Double Entendre Anyone?

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: GUEST,Bardan
Date: 23 Mar 07 - 12:01 AM

The one I always remember is in all the Christmas services where Mary asks the angel how she'll bear a child since she's a virgin and the angel goes "the holy spirit will come upon you". You could always rely on one or two sniggers at school.

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: Leadfingers
Date: 23 Mar 07 - 10:15 AM

200 !!

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: GUEST,Eternal Youth
Date: 23 Mar 07 - 11:10 AM

Tommy Cooper, a British comedian, got into a lot of trouble with the BBC censors, with this one:

"I was walking along a narrow bridge, and I saw this naked woman standing in front of me. I didn't know whether to block her passage or toss myself off"

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: Fiolar
Date: 24 Mar 07 - 10:07 AM

Eternal Youth: That wasn't Tommy Cooper. It was actually Max Miller one of the great musical hall entertainers.

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: Snufkin
Date: 22 Jul 08 - 12:14 AM

What about The Game of All Fours, sung by (among others) Maddy Prior and Kate Rusby? The whole thing is pretty much a double entendre, but here are a few verses from Rusby's version:

We hadn't been walking a few miles together,
Before this young damsel began to show free,
She sat herself down, saying "Sit down beside me,
The game we shall play will be one, two and three."

I said, My dear lady if you're fond of the gaming,
There's one game I know I would like you to learn,
The game it is called The Game Of All Fours,"
So I took out my pack and began the first turn.

She cut the cards and I fell a dealing,
I dealt her a trump and myself the poor Jack,
She led off her ace and stole the Jack from me,
Saying, "Jack is the card I like best in your pack.

"I dealt the last time; its your turn to shuffle,
My turn to show the best card in the pack,"
Once more she'd the ace and stole the Jack from me,
Once more I lost when I laid down poor Jack.

So I took up my hat and I bid her good morning,
I said, You're the best that I know at this game."
She answered, "Young man, come back tomorrow,
We'll play the game over and over and over and over and over again"

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: Bryn Pugh
Date: 22 Jul 08 - 10:56 AM

Confucius he say : man with big balls had no toys as a child.

What about "Old King Cole" ?

He called for his pipe and he called for his bowl
And he called for his jugglers three.

Every Juggler had a fine pair of balls
And a fine pair of balls had he -
Oh ! Throw your balls in the air, said the jugglers . . .

Coalmen three : Would you like it a the front or the back, said the coalmen . . .

Lots more where they came from !

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: Folkiedave
Date: 22 Jul 08 - 11:20 AM

Too much thread to read.

Roy Bailey's goodnight wish for many years.....

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: quokka
Date: 22 Jul 08 - 12:37 PM

I'm surprised nobody has mentioned the Woody Guthrie song
"Walt Whitman's Niece" - words by Woody (1946) music by Billy Bragg,(1997) from the album Mermaid Avenue:

Last night or the night before that
I won't say which night
A seaman friend of mine
I'll not say which seaman
Walked up to a big old building
I won't say which building
And would not have walked up the stairs
Not to say which stairs
If there had not have been two girls
Leaving out the names of those two girls

I recall a door, a big long room
I'll not tell which room
I remember a deep blue rug
But I can't say which rug
A girl took down a book of poems
not to say which book of poems
And as she read, I laid my head
and I can't tell which head
Down in her lap
and I can't mention which lap

My seaman buddy and girl moved off
After a couple of pages and there I was
All night long, laying and listening
And forgetting the poems
And as well as I could recall
Or my seaman buddy could recollect
My girl had told us that she was a niece
of Walt Whitman, but not which niece

And it takes a night and a girl
and a book of this kind
A long long way to find its way back

Sleeve notes say Woody wrote this in 1946 - pretty explicit for the time, I think! Now just to figure out if it was a twosome, a threesome or a foursome!

Cheers,
Quokka

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: GUEST,Pisces
Date: 22 Jul 08 - 12:44 PM

And what about the policeman who summons a lady for questioning with a moving crook'd finger. Then said, "I knew you would come on my finger."

Or the girl who is about to get unwanted sex and says. " No, Dont, Stop. No dont, stop. No, dont stop.".............

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 22 Jul 08 - 02:05 PM

I really love driving down country lanes in the Summer and seeing all the young couples on the verge !!

I once took my girlfriend out into the fog and mist !!!

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: Alan Day
Date: 22 Jul 08 - 02:51 PM

I've got a Woodpecker on my nuts.
Al

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: Joe_F
Date: 22 Jul 08 - 08:22 PM

If you were at the end of a pier and a suicidal young lady came bearing down on you, would you toss yourself off or obstruct her passage?

Further Old King Cole stanzas:

...painters...brush...slap it up & down, up & down...
...tailors...needle...stick it in & out, in & out...
...baker...tart...fill that tart with cream...
...butchers...block...slap your meat on the block...
Fiddle-de-fiddle-de-dee, said the fiddlers,
Merry, merry men are we!
There's none so fair as can compare
With the boys of the varsity.

One might also note a stanza in "My God, How the Money Rolls In":

My uncle makes big tallow candles
Of wax that is specially soft.
He says they may come in quite handy
If ever his business drops off.

Cf.

If you should wed a businessman, be wary, O be wary!
He'll say he has to stay in town on business necessary.
His business is the business that he gives his secretary.
Oh, I hate men! -- "Kiss Me, Kate"

Subject: Un Joueur Du Luth / The Lute Player
From: Genie
Date: 23 Jul 08 - 04:35 AM

The Limeliters ("Our Men In San Francisco") did a song called "Le Joueur du Luth" (The Lute Player), which is entirely double entendre.

I can't find the lyrics on line, but I'd love to have them! They are in both English and French.

The story of the song is that a young lute player advertises "lute playing lessons" and becomes a sensation, with many a young lass beating a path to his door to, um, "learn to play." One day a much older lady comes to his door asking for "lute lessons," and he tells her that "you're too old to play this game." Whereupon she replies, "I've been playing this game for 60 years -- and there's no substitute for experience!"

Anybody got the lyrics?

G

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: GUEST,Tise Tobin
Date: 06 May 09 - 05:51 PM

Pete credits his friend "Joe" with the authorship of the song, and I believe the woman's name is Molly, but I'm grateful to you 'cause you got down the words I had forgotten!

The song was part of a Folk Alley stream for Pete's 90th birthday, if you care to hear it.


http://www.folkalley.com/archives/001122.php

Peace,
Tise

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: MorwenEdhelwen1
Date: 22 Apr 11 - 04:57 AM

Four words. "My Donkey Want Water."

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: GUEST,David Dana-Bashian
Date: 01 Aug 19 - 12:18 PM

Although Alex Hassilev received the writing credit on the 1963 live album "Our Men in San Francisco", the lyrics to "á làuberge de l'écu" (in English, "At the Buckler's Inn") apparently largely anticipated the lyrics to "The Lute Player". If so, then, by today's standard, the lyrics are tame. See https://lyricstranslate.com/en/%C3%A1-l%C3%A0uberge-de-l%C3%A9cu-bucklers-inn.html .

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: GUEST,Sol
Date: 01 Aug 19 - 02:25 PM

Re. earlier posts about Max Miller & the Beeb ban. I think it was Max Wall who was banned by the BBC for telling a similar joke about meeting a young lady on a log while crossing a river. He didn't know whether to ....etc. IIRC, he told it on a lunchtime radio show called "Workers Playtime". Unbeknownst to him, he was still On Air.

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: Mrrzy
Date: 03 Aug 19 - 10:00 AM

I read once of a drunken musician saying that syncopation was an uneven movement from bar to bar...

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: Steve Gardham
Date: 03 Aug 19 - 03:46 PM

Most of these posts refer to 'puns' not 'double entendres' with a few other things thrown in. Quite entertaining but a dictionary wouldn't go amiss.

Double Pedant!

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: Mrrzy
Date: 04 Aug 19 - 07:13 PM

A double entendre IS a pun, but not all puns are double entendres. If that is the plural...

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: FreddyHeadey
Date: 04 Aug 19 - 07:30 PM

At choir practice couple of months ago the 'mistress' asked
"Now, basses, would you like me to beat your parts out on my organ?"

Subject: RE: Double Entendre Anyone?
From: Mrrzy
Date: 06 Aug 19 - 11:16 PM

What's better than roses on your piano? Tulips on your organ.