BS: MY version of HELL

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: pdq
Date: 12 Mar 09 - 03:32 PM

HEAVEN: A place where people speak the English lauguage, eat French food and use German technology.

HELL: A place where they speak the French language, eat German food and use English technology.

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: frogprince
Date: 06 Mar 09 - 08:32 PM

Ah, yes...now for my imitation of a torpedo tube...

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: olddude
Date: 06 Mar 09 - 07:28 PM

When they stick you in that little tube to do the MRI
it is also unwise to eat a bean burrito before going in ...

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Micca
Date: 06 Mar 09 - 05:52 PM

I got a brief preview a few weeks ago, they did an MRI scan on my brain (Think holding perfectly still with your head in a washing machine) they put special headphones on me to heep my head perfectly still. They played Pop Music through the headphones for the ENTIRE 25 minutes the scan took, but not just Pop Music, but a Pop Radio station so the in between the "songs" there was some inane, irepressibly cheerful MORON making "small talk" (as in VERY small in content). If That was Hell, I would not be very surprised!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Diva
Date: 06 Mar 09 - 01:18 PM

I don't think I've heard that old dude..........don't think I'd like to

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: KEVINOAF
Date: 06 Mar 09 - 11:57 AM

if you're anywhere in britain you're in it!

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: John P
Date: 05 Mar 09 - 04:05 PM

Classically trained violinists playing reels exactly as the music is written -- arrghh!

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: olddude
Date: 05 Mar 09 - 08:56 AM

Diva
how about Pop singers trying to do Folk music to Kenny G
OH that gave me chills

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Diva
Date: 05 Mar 09 - 08:50 AM

Pop singers singing folk songs and applying pop singing standards to them. Makes me very cross and grumpy. I think I am becoming a militant ballad singer!

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: SINSULL
Date: 05 Mar 09 - 08:20 AM

There you are!

To answer your question - I think you did, Micca.

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Micca
Date: 04 Mar 09 - 08:36 AM

Who was it said that "Hell is a place where all the Beer barrels have holes in the bottom and none of the women do"

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: SINSULL
Date: 04 Mar 09 - 08:26 AM

Yesterday, one of the office phones went wonkie and produced an itchy staticky noise like the one I used to get with dial up computer connections. I thought would explode. Like nails on a blackboard. I wasn't alone. Someone unplugged the guy's phone. He wasn't happy but at least no one was murdered.

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Riginslinger
Date: 03 Mar 09 - 10:40 AM

The reincarnation of Ronald Reagan!

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Donuel
Date: 03 Mar 09 - 10:13 AM

...being one of those people who are made to apologize to Rush Limbaugh.

Its become a sort of a rite of passage to be a true Republican.

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: JennieG
Date: 02 Mar 09 - 11:01 PM

Have to agree with you on Kenny G. But the worst thing - really truly my idea of hell - would be an endless loop playing Whitney Houston singing "and Aaaaayyyyyyyy wiiiillll alwaaaayyyyyysss laaaarrrve yoooouuu". Or that song from Titanic. That kinda stuff.

Cheers
JennieG

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: kendall
Date: 02 Mar 09 - 07:44 PM

Reminds me of Homer and Jethro singing their version of Wildwood Flower. ...as a stripper she thought that her fortune would be found,
But she ran into trouble and then she was gone,
Instead of saying "take it off" they hollered, "Leave it on".

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: John P
Date: 02 Mar 09 - 02:36 PM

My room in hell is full of people playing frantic non-melodic jazz on saxophones. Odd how many hells have saxophones.

If nudity were legal no one would notice after a few weeks, and we might actually get a generation without the Victorian hang ups.

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Ebbie
Date: 02 Mar 09 - 10:28 AM

sheesh I pictured a donut sliced in two.

Not that I'm literal.

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Becca72
Date: 02 Mar 09 - 09:44 AM

There has been a topless donut shop in Westbrook, Maine for years...

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Ebbie
Date: 02 Mar 09 - 01:10 AM

Rodney Crowell, a good musician who does country music, at one time was married to one of the Mandrell girls,

Just a minute - I'll go look him up:

From Wikipedia:

Rodney Crowell (born August 7, 1950) is a Grammy Award-winning musician, known primarily for his work as a singer and songwriter in country music.

Crowell was born in Houston, Texas to James Walter Crowell and Addie Cauzette Willoughby. He is considered to be part of both the alternative country and the mainstream country music camps[citation needed]. He is a contemporary of Steve Earle and, like Earle, was also influenced by the songwriting greats Guy Clark and Townes Van Zandt. Rodney played guitar and sang for three years in Emmylou Harris' "Hot Band".

By the way he was *not* married to a Mandrell but Rosanne Cash. Humpf.

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: kendall
Date: 01 Mar 09 - 09:05 PM

Who?

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Ebbie
Date: 01 Mar 09 - 06:07 PM

Good grief, Rapaire. You never hear of Rodney Crowell?

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Mar 09 - 05:42 PM

Ain't no country singer worth the powder ta blow him away who's named "Rodney." Hell, he'd be laughed outa Nashville.

"LADIES AN' GENNULMEN! RODNEY...hehe...hehehehehehe...HAWHAWHAW...."

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 01 Mar 09 - 05:14 PM

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: olddude - PM
Date: 01 Mar 09 - 10:31 AM

Some country guy wrote a song recently called "show them to me"
first off, he sells a gillion records and makes a gillion dollars. Then in his concerts when he plays it all the young girls flash him


Ah do bleeve that's Rodney Carrington... was available on YouBoob for a while... but I couldn't begin to tell you where.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: olddude
Date: 01 Mar 09 - 11:25 AM

Another version of Hell
I love my mother to pieces, She is 88 years old, looks and acts 20 years younger but is losing her hearing. So this morning she calls me on the phone, I cringe I know what is coming

Hi Dan it is your mother, just called to say hi and make sure you are not sick

I am fine mom ..

What! you are drinking wine this early in the morning.
No mom I am not drinking wine I don't drink I am not sick

OH you are working on your sink
No I am not working on my sink I am not sick I am fine and I don't drink

Well you need to drink lots of fluids if when you are sick and you should not be working on your sink if you feel ill

I am not sick, I am not working on my sink, and I don't drink wine

Well just wanted to say hi and I hope you feel better

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: olddude
Date: 01 Mar 09 - 10:31 AM

Some country guy wrote a song recently called "show them to me"
first off, he sells a gillion records and makes a gillion dollars. Then in his concerts when he plays it all the young girls flash him

now life just aint fair

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: jacqui.c
Date: 01 Mar 09 - 10:21 AM

Fine - but only look - no touching.

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: kendall
Date: 01 Mar 09 - 09:46 AM

I'd like to volunteer to be judge.Kinda like American Idol.

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: jacqui.c
Date: 01 Mar 09 - 09:25 AM

Still... I would prefer it was low key and not in my face

Quite - it depends how far south is still considered good to look at and what happens if a older gal with less than nice tits applies for a job? Given the present economic climate that ain't beyond the bounds.....

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Feb 09 - 10:30 PM

Reminds me of an old joke, the punchline to which is "Ah, I didn't ask for cream in my coffee."

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: gnu
Date: 28 Feb 09 - 09:18 PM

Sorry about the thread drift yet again...no pun intended, but re the tits...

Age discrimination? Why?

If you got nice tits and you wanna work at one of those places, you get hired. Nice tits are nice tits.

Matter of fact, since the population is aging, maybe a titty cafe with older gals would make money?

Still... I would prefer it was low key and not in my face.

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: jacqui.c
Date: 28 Feb 09 - 01:41 PM

What a beautiful piece Dean.

Liz - I was thinking something about the same. What I want to know is if some one will start shouting age discrimination when, maybe, they are turned down for a job there.

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: GUEST,Jayto
Date: 28 Feb 09 - 01:38 PM

Dean that is beautiful.
JT

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: olddude
Date: 28 Feb 09 - 01:36 PM

Dean
I have an office full of Art. I collected it for years
and that is first class my friend

absolutely beautiful

Wow what an artist !!

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 28 Feb 09 - 12:21 PM

"only young, firm women will go topless, so the rest will decline such offers of employment anyway."

Oh Kendall... have you never seen a real nudist camp? Those who happily drop their kecks at the drop of a hat are never those most physically suited to doing so!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Ebbie
Date: 28 Feb 09 - 11:11 AM

That's beautiful, Dean.

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: frogprince
Date: 28 Feb 09 - 10:35 AM

You could say that this was done, in part, to show appreciation for certain lovely things and the purpose they serve. When I finished it, a couple of years back, a couple of the Mudcat folk helped me sort out the name for it, "Promises To Keep", a backhanded play on a Paul Simon line.
                         Dean

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: olddude
Date: 28 Feb 09 - 10:06 AM

and it would be a single malt also Rapaire

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Feb 09 - 09:57 AM

Nothing to read, and the air filled with the music of bad bagpipers and bad concert harpists, all trying to play in tune music transposed from a ukelele-bass saxophone duet, with lots and lots of whisk(e)y available but which evaporates before it touches your lips.

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: kendall
Date: 28 Feb 09 - 09:05 AM

If God had wanted us to be nude, we would have been born that way.

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: gnu
Date: 28 Feb 09 - 08:01 AM

I like tits. But, I just don't see the appeal of titty bars or titty cafés. As a young and curious lad, I performed extensive research, every spare moment I had, which included investigating such venues of exposure when I was in the big city. Cover charges, expensive drink and food... nice tits, yes, but, "water, water everywhere and not a drop to drink". Essentially, useless as tits on a bull.

And, I certainly understand SINS's viewpoint. Such has no place in a residential neighbourhood or on Main Street. I am disgusted by a situation we have in Moncton, a strip club across the street from Moncton High School. I am no prude, but, not in my back yard, thank you.

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: kendall
Date: 28 Feb 09 - 07:24 AM

They don't have to worry about age discrimination; only young, firm women will go topless, so the rest will decline such offers of employment anyway.
I predict that when the novelty wears off the place will fold. What ever happened to those theaters that showed only xxx films?

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 28 Feb 09 - 03:31 AM

Ah, but in the interests of diversity and economics, are they going to employ older workers? I'm not adverse to the odd boobie here and there but I do object when it's dangling in my cocoa (I don't drink coffee)!

My idea of hell - a cruiseship stocked with books by Jeffrey Archer and Barbara Cartland, and no Mudcat!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: olddude
Date: 28 Feb 09 - 01:29 AM

Bert
can't stop laughing good point

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: Bert
Date: 27 Feb 09 - 11:49 PM

Slag says try equal parts berry (blue) and orange. I was gonna say Blueberry and milk would come close.

I also second Kendal's thoughts that boobs are kinda nice and if I were in a topless coffee shop, OldDude it wouldn't be the donuts that I'd be choking on.

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: GUEST,Slag
Date: 27 Feb 09 - 11:48 PM

I'm with you kendall, the human female breast IS one, if not THE loveliest things in the world. And come on! There is nothing perverse about it. It was the first thing I truly recognized this side of the womb. We are all predisposed to find it, admire it, love it and grow from it.   Talk about mana!

The shape is lovely and has fascinated artists through the ages. It is repeated in form over and over again in nature. It has a velvety texture, just the right amount of turgor and resilience and the nipple is alive and responsive to touch. What's not to love!

Without the breast and the wonderful species, the human female, who bares, bears it, this would be a hellish world indeed

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: katlaughing
Date: 27 Feb 09 - 11:35 PM

In an attempt to fulfil the duties thrust upon me by Sinsull in another thread, for those who don't know/remember, I give you a thread which has some of the earliest evidence of the infamous Tavern Jello Pit!

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: kendall
Date: 27 Feb 09 - 10:13 PM

The surest way to make something interesting is to ban it.

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: olddude
Date: 27 Feb 09 - 08:11 PM

Vassalboro
Is that one of those little donkeys they have at the North Rim of the Grand Canyon

Subject: RE: BS: MY version of HELL
From: kendall
Date: 27 Feb 09 - 08:01 PM

I didn't know you are familiar with Vassalboro. Tell me about it.
My feeling is,if you don't like it, stay away!