Lyr Req: Puff the Magic Dragon (parody)

Subject: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From:
Date: 01 Sep 99 - 04:22 PM

Does anyone know the lyrics to a parody of Puff the magic dragon called Flush the magic toilet, sung in the UK folk clubs in the early 1970s. Whether this version was ever recorded by anyone i don't know. The first line starts, Flush the magic toilet lived near Southend. Does anyone know the rest. Ken L

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: bill\sables
Date: 02 Sep 99 - 01:50 PM

Hi Ken L I will post it to you later Cheers Bill

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From:
Date: 03 Sep 99 - 03:55 PM

Hi bill\sables I appear to have made an error in my e mail address. My correct one is now included. Awaiting your response to my request. Thanks in anticipation Ken L

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: campfire
Date: 03 Sep 99 - 11:14 PM

Bill - I hope you post here and not just send it privately - sounds interesting.

campfire

Subject: RE: Lyr/Chords Req: PUFF THE MAGIC DRAGON
From: Dave Bryant
Date: 05 Jul 02 - 07:25 AM

All I know is:

Poof the magic dragon, lived on the shelf.
He had no-one to play with, so he played with himself.
Poof the magic dragon, wasn't very tough.
He only played with little boys - that's why they called him Poof!

Subject: RE: Lyr/Chords Req: PUFF THE MAGIC DRAGON
From: Hecate
Date: 05 Jul 02 - 07:40 AM

Got another rude version (credit to a chap called Michael Bye)

Puff the magic dragon *anks down by me he shaves his bollocks in the autumn mist and pisses in the sea Hoy!

Think the original goes something like....

puff the magic dragon lived by the sea and frolicked in the autumn mist in a land called honolee,

Little Jackie paper loved that rascal puff, and brought him rings and sealing wax and other fancy stuff.

Dragons live forever, but not so little boys, Paper, strings and (something) rings make way for other toys,

One grey night it happened, jackie paper came no more, And puff that might dragon he released a fearful roar.

(You can see why people get the urge to do rude versions.)

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 18 Aug 03 - 02:52 PM

It's not really a very good idea to put your email address in an open thread.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From:
Date: 18 Aug 03 - 03:11 PM

McGrath, it was a LONG time ago.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: Son of the Mill
Date: 04 Dec 03 - 01:13 AM

Puff the Magic Dragon couldn`t find a mate
He wandered through the forest, quite accustomed to his fate
Then one day he found her, a real hot bit of stuff>
But he did not know what to do with her
Thats why they called him "Puff"

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: Leadfingers
Date: 04 Dec 03 - 06:34 AM

There ae a number of Puff variations in the threads relating to the Original song,including the 'follow up' verses.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 04 Dec 03 - 07:29 AM

"Puff the Magic Faggot, worked for the ABC"... :-)

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From:
Date: 26 Mar 04 - 01:46 AM

Hi, I used to have a Swedish girlfriend...she used to like to sing Puff the magic dragon in swedish:

Puff en pappers drake, lo:g na:r vid strand...

Does anyone have the lyrics to it? Or can anyone find it's mp3? I have searched for it on google, kazaaa...etc. not even a mention of a Swedish version

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: Janice in NJ
Date: 26 Mar 04 - 10:11 AM

I have heard quite a few Puff parodies, including

Puff the Marijuana

Puff the Fucked Up Pot-Head

Fuck the Giant Penis

AIDS the Nasty Virus

Ralph the Magic Faggot
a/k/a Ralph the Magic Drag Queen

Pat the Irish Faggot
a favorite at the NYC St. Patrick's Day parade

Squish the Tiny Maggot

and most recently

Bush the Tragic Puppet.

I presume there are many more.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 26 Mar 04 - 03:53 PM

Would like to see the Ralph ones, please...

Subject: Lyr Add: RALPH THE MAGIC DRAG QUEEN
From: Janice in NJ
Date: 26 Mar 04 - 05:32 PM

RALPH THE MAGIC DRAG QUEEN

Oh, Ralph the magic drag queen,
Lived at the Y,
And frolicked in her neighbor's room,
Whenever they got high.
Ralph the magic drag queen,
Lived at the Y,
And frolicked in her neighbor's room,
Whenever they got high.

Little Tommy Tight-Toosh,
Loved that drag queen Ralph,
And whenever he was feeling hot,
He'd stick it in her mouth.
Ralph the magic drag queen,
Lived at the Y,
And frolicked in her neighbor's room,
Whenever they got high.

Together they would travel,
With earrings made of pearls,
Ralphie she would dish the dirt,
With all the drag queen girls.
Gossip, gossip, gossip,
Around her they would flock,
She'd shake her tits, it gave 'em fits,
And then she'd wave her cock.

One sad day it happened,
Poor Ralphie got the bug,
Tommy Tight-Toosh came no more,
For a blow job or a hug.
Without her lifelong friend,
Ralph could not get high,
So they sent Ralph to some hospice,
To waste away and die.

Oh, Ralph the magic drag queen,
Lived at the Y,
And frolicked in her neighbor's room,
Whenever they got high.
Ralph the magic drag queen,
Lived at the Y,
And frolicked in her neighbor's room,
Whenever they got high.

Subject: Lyr Add: PAT THE IRISH FAGGOT
From: Janice in NJ
Date: 26 Mar 04 - 06:27 PM

Although no one asked...

PAT THE IRISH FAGGOT

Oh, Pat the Irish faggot,
Lived in New York town,
And dreamed about the big parade,
When Saint Patrick's Day came round.
Pat the Irish faggot,
Lived in New York town,
And dreamed about the big parade,
When Saint Patrick's Day came round.

But the cardinals and bishops,
Said that buggery's a crime,
Unless it's done to altar boys,
Below the age of nine.
Still Paddy waited patiently,
Again each year he'd try,
Said the leaders of the A.O.H.:
"No faggots need apply!"

Then one sad day it happened,
Poor Paddy he turned straight,
And like a good straight Irishman,
He joined the A.O.H.
But at his initiation,
Much too his surprise,
A hundred naked Irishmen,
Pranced before his eyes.

Some had gaping ass-holes,
And some had quivering hips,
Some of them had hard-ons,
Or semen on their lips,
Some of them were married,
And some attended mass,
And some went up to Paddy,
And kissed his Irish ass.

Now Pat the Irish faggot,
Marches every year,
You can watch him blow his Irish pipes,
And never know he's queer.
While the A.O.H. will tell you,
That gayness is a sin,
Pat the Irish faggot knows,
Their secret's safe with him!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 26 Mar 04 - 07:06 PM

Frankly the versions posted here are unjustifiable, nasty, unwitty, and homophobic. This is not the mudcat as I know and like it.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: fiddler
Date: 26 Mar 04 - 08:45 PM

Most of these versions were written long ago when political correctness was not such and issue and lots of us still had senses of humour. If I thought folk meant or in any way beleived in any of the above lyrics then I would be horrified and agree with you totally Richard.

Teh Lyric requested was in fact posted acouple of months ago - I used to do it in the North about 7 miles form Peterlee - the toen in which it had its parady!

Andy

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: GUEST,Kent Davis
Date: 27 Mar 04 - 12:28 AM

Mr. Bridge,
"I gently suggest you need to challenge your own repressions. What you say so strongly echoes the art establishment response, for example, to composers who "broke the rules" of classical composition, to "Dejeuner sur l'herbe", the response of the Reverend Dr. Bowdler to Shakespeare.

Art - including the performance of folk music - may not be that great, but if it is not allowed to disturb it will never be great...

If you censor all art that is capable of causing offence you do art a disservice. If you do not censor it but withdraw then you likely do yourself a disservice."

Or so you said, in part, on March 14 and 15. Maybe it depends on whose ox is being gored.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 27 Mar 04 - 12:43 AM

Oh for goodness' sake - here we bloody well go again!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 27 Mar 04 - 05:03 AM

It may be arguable (although I would disagree) that I have over-reacted here, but although the parallel is close enough to be worth debating, I think Kent Davis draws an imperfect analogy. Where did I say that it would be wrong to say that the T-shirts under discussion (elsewhere) were nasty and unwitty? Where here did I say that I would or should walk out of a performance of these songs?

By all means disagree with points of view. That way lies civilised discussion and the possibility of convincing the respective persons that they have erred.

"Justifiability" is an issue of balance. In my opinion (IMHO, if you like) these songs do not have sufficient redeeming virtue, but their central vice is bigotry. It is the be-all and end-all of their "wit".

Traditional songs may (it may be a matter of balance) with expressions in them unacceptable today (perhaps of colour prejudice or anti-semitism) may still be "justifiable" to perform because of historical interest. Others because of musical merit despite associations - eg "Die Lindenbaum". I don't (but it is a matter of perception and evaluation, and others may disagree with me) see a parallel in these songs.



I expect history will decide.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 27 Mar 04 - 09:12 AM

If there are not a lot of fools like the two who just gaasked form gave and aceppted the songs, then they will disappear, most likely. But popularity by itself was never a good precursor for preservation over extended periods of time..

having senthese two examples, I doublt if I will ever sing them, but it has been educational to see them.

Robin

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon (parody)
From: Janice in NJ
Date: 27 Mar 04 - 11:39 AM

Such is the nature of bawdy songs. They are often raunchy, offensive, disgusting, and not fit for public performance. Unless you are Chuck Berry leading a house full of screaming teenagers singing My Ding-a-Ling. Go to the Immortalia website and you will find MP3 files for hundreds of songs, many of them much more offensive than these two. Most however, are heteroerotic. I find it refreshing to find at least a couple of bawdy songs that are homoerotic. Just let me add that both songs came from LGBT sources. Ralph, it has been pointed out, has been around in one form or another for many years. I first heard it at the Atlantic House bar in Provincetown, Massachusetts, in the 1970s. The verse referring to AIDS was added later. Pat came out of ILGO's still unsuccessful campaign to march in the NYC Saint Patrick's Day parade.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: fiddler
Date: 27 Mar 04 - 06:45 PM

So no one here approves of the Vicar and the Frog!

Words in digitrad and associated threads

To develop the arguments

I once heard a politician defending fox hunting prints on their walls lovely prints and right for the time when the originals were painted - and should be viewed in this light - but praps not valid as a commment on foxhunting today!

I have sing puff the magic dragon and flush the magic toilet for ever and no one has ever objected - I did come near to getting hit for the Hartlepool monkey though!

I'm rambling

A
XX

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 28 Mar 04 - 07:11 AM

Odd - I don't find the Hartlepool monkey offensive at all, and find the Frog and the Vicar inoffensive enough to be redeemed by its wit.

But the point about bigotry (of the "humorous" variety) surely is that it assumes and denigrates (allegedly as "funny") a characteristic (or, I should make doubly clear, an alleged if not actual characteristic) of a minority that is discriminated against or a minority that is vulnerable.

So, arguably, "Eskimo Nell" while pretty direct, does not have (to my ears) this element of bigotry, as neither do for example (albeit less direct, but quite unambiguous) Shakespeare's erotic poems ("License my hands, and let them roving go..." etc).

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: Fibula Mattock
Date: 28 Mar 04 - 09:24 AM

Metaphysical poets. John Donne. Elegy to his mistress going to bed ("Licence my roving hands, and let them goe..."). I remember learning this for A-level English, and I remember how embarrassed my poor English teacher was, faced with a class of adolescent girls who knew full-well what the metaphors were! He handed out a few notes, mumbled something, and went on to George Herbert.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: Janice in NJ
Date: 28 Mar 04 - 10:47 AM

Finnegan's Wake began as an English musical hall song that ridiculed the Irish. But it is such a damn good song, with such a wonderful metaphor of resurrection, that the Irish soon adopted it as their own. Likewise, The Auld Orange Flute started as a song that ridiculed the Roman Catholic Church, but it is such a wonderful song that today it is more often sung by Irish Catholics in self-mocking humor than it is sung by Protestants. By the same token, did the songs of the late Alan Sherman perpetuate stereotypes of the Jews? Or were they intended to lampoon one's own group, and thereby confront prejudice with humor? I believe we all know the answer.

I do not know where, when, or under what circumstances Ralph the Magic Drag Queen originated. It has certainly been around for a long time. A friend tells me that he heard Al Cooper (later from Blood, Sweat, and Tears) sing a version of it in the mid 1960s. I do know that it has been taken up my gay men, and that if you go to Provincetown in the summer or Key West in the winter there is a chance you will sung in chorus around a piano. Pat the Irish Faggot is a piece of more recent political satire that came out of the struggle by the Irish Lesbian and Gay Organization of New York to march in that city's official Saint Patrick's Day parade.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: Janice in NJ
Date: 28 Mar 04 - 10:58 AM

Sorry, I hit the "submit" button without proofreading. That sentence should be: I do know that it has been taken up my gay men, and that if you go to Provincetown in the summer or Key West in the winter there is a chance you will hear it sung in chorus around a piano.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 28 Mar 04 - 01:01 PM

Yes, Fibula, I accept your correction. My wits wandering in stead of hands.

Janice, I am not sure I agree with your argument (if I correctly paraphrase it) that since the songs have been adopted they are acceptable, or justified for all to sing.

Since I am not of colour (a nice safe bit of PC-speak, but not being American, I can't say "Afro-American"), I would not risk calling someone "nigger". But those of colour have adopted it.
Comparably "ho", and "queer".

I even remember hearing some other lawyers bantering about "Who's a clever Jewish boy then". But it wouldn't make it right for me to say it.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: Janice in NJ
Date: 28 Mar 04 - 06:49 PM

Richard, are these not your words?

"Frankly the versions posted here are unjustifiable, nasty, unwitty, and homophobic. This is not the mudcat as I know and like it. "

I took that as an attempt to shut down dialogue, and not as an attempt to discuss what songs are apprpropriate (or inappropriate) to be sung by such and such people, at such and such times, and under such and such circumstances. But since you made the statement, let me respond point by point.

Unjustifiable? Au contraire! This is a thread about Puff the Magic Dragon parodies, is it not? You may not like these particular parodies, but here they are.

Nasty? Yes. As I said earlier, that is the nature of bawdy songs. In Pat the Irish Faggot the nastiness is aimed at the homophobic leadership of the Ancient Order of Hibernians, and not at the lesbians and gays who want to march in their parade. Or maybe you didn't notice?

Unwitty?. There's no accounting for taste, is there? I find Ralph the Magic Drag Queen to be rather silly and simplistic. I find Pat the Irish Faggot to be exceptionally witty.

Homophobic? Well, that depends upon context, doesn't it? But since you wanted to silence the debate, we would never have had the chance to discuss context if you had your way.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the Tragic Faggot (parody)
From: GUEST
Date: 20 Feb 10 - 10:06 AM

Puff, The Tragic Faggot (as sung by Tony Snell, ca1965)
    (Tune: "Puff, The Magic Dragon"

    Puff, the tragic faggot, went on the spree
    And he frolicked in the summer at the Nudist Colony!
    Little Jackie Paper, loved that rascal, Puff,
    But wished he'd never started using that "greasy kid stuff!"

       Puff, the tragic faggot, went on the spree
       And he frolicked in the summer at the Nudist Colony!

    Together they would travel, on a boat with billowed sail
    Jackie Paper climbing up on Puff's romantic tail
    Noble Kings and Princes would bend low when they came
    Pirates lowered *everything* when Puff roared out his name!

       Puff, the tragic faggot, went on the spree
       And he frolicked in the summer at the Nudist Colony!

    A faggot lives for ages, but not so little boys;
    Ding-a-ling in a Fairy Ring make way for other joys.
    One grey night it happened, Jackie Paper came no more
    And Puff, the tragic faggot, was prostrate [?] on the floor.

       Puff, the tragic faggot, went on the spree
       And he frolicked in the summer at the Nudist Colony!

    His head was bent in sorrow, his tears they fell like rain
    Nobody would come to play along his "Cherry" Lane
    Puff the Faggot killed himself, and I know why he did
    Life was nothing when he could not use that "greasy kid".

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the Magic Dragon (parody)
From: GUEST
Date: 22 Feb 13 - 12:48 PM

Gosh, this version was posted 10 years ago!!! Anyway .. this is the chorus I remember and I'd love to find the complete song ... who was it sang it? jasper carrot? Noel Murphy? I cant remember!!



Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Puff the magic dragon ( parody)
From: Son of the Mill
Date: 04 Dec 03 - 01:13 AM

Puff the Magic Dragon couldn`t find a mate
He wandered through the forest, quite accustomed to his fate
Then one day he found her, a real hot bit of stuff>
But he did not know what to do with her
Thats why they called him "Puff"