BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 07:08 PM

A good name for a drunken gasbag...

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 07:05 PM

Blotto Blimp? What kind of name is that?

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Bongo Bimp
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 06:33 PM

Beat it, Bible Dude! Go settle your "mutual differences" with the Atheists;-) But If one of them gets out a tube of Chapstick, you'd better get out there quick. And don't come crying to me. I'm not your safe ride home. I'm a Bonobo, dammit. A BONOBO!

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 06:13 PM

Bonobos settle their differences with mutual masturbation. Your pal the snow monkey is more of a howler.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 06:03 PM

He's tired of people utterin' special slurs, Jack.   (not spesh-'l....SPEESH-'l) As in slanderin' a species, see?

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 05:07 PM

You are pretty cranky for a bonobo. I think you are just a snow monkey that got its tail caught in the ski lift.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 05:02 PM

100 visits to Covington towers!.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Bongo Bimp
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 04:46 PM

Peace be with you, Brother Chongo! Our time will come!!!

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Bongo Bimp
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 04:44 PM

And when it happens, all these tough guys will be squealing, "Help me! Help me!" like little weenie pigs. And do you know what I'm gonna say? "I'm not a miracle worker, I'm a Bonobo,dammit! A BONOBO!!"

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 04:33 PM

Nobody knows when it will happen, Bongo. If they say they do, they're lyin'. But happen it will!

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Bongo Bimp
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 03:49 PM

You don't get it, do you, Rapparee? The humans time is almost over. One more stupid stunt, and you'll be history. The other primates will get their turn, and if you don't shut your mouth and accept your place in the New Order, you'll pay the price. When this will happen, I don't know. I'm not an oracle, I'm a Bonobo, dammit, A BONOBO!

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 03:28 PM

I have nothing against monkeys like Chonga as long as they know their place -- wearing cute jackets and hats and dancing for an organ grinder. Alternately, they serve as admirable subjects for experiments too dangerous to risk a human in.

For instance, King Kong was the result of a genetic experiment gone terribly wrong and he had to be "put down" in the most merciful way possible. He was so cute on the stage, but he got all uppity and, well, you know the unfortunate ending.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 02:56 PM

"Notice how I don't even hafta be around for these yoyos to keep yammerin' on about me, Stim?"

Well my charming tail deleted, monkey passing for chimp. That was because the character you share a loft with in the Covington Apartments asked us to. So iffin ya don't like it take it up with him.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Stim
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 02:48 PM

It's sad, Chongo. It really is. I keep asking myself, "Where's the love?".

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 02:20 PM

Notice how I don't even hafta be around for these yoyos to keep yammerin' on about me, Stim? That's coz they wish they was more like me, insteada bein' a buncha sad losers. It's true that Rap briefly served as my runnin' mate back in '08...and it's probably the main reason I lost the damn election! He set the nation back by decades. He will be remembered in future centuries the way Benedict Arnold is remembered now. The man is a total disaster. Lower than Death Valley. Even worse than Bobertz!

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Stim
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 01:32 PM

"They're all soft and cuddly-like and would jist love ta have ya snuggle up with 'em." Especially the Grizzly Bears.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: The Sandman
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 01:00 PM

i admire the way he handles his feticule

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 09:29 AM

I have to say rap that looking at the variety of animals in your "Zoo" it does look like y'all just built a fence around the dumpster at the McDonalds.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 09:20 AM

You oughta come visit and git up close and personal, like they say, with some of the critters. They're all soft and cuddly-like and would jist love ta have ya snuggle up with 'em.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Stim
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 12:11 AM

And as for that "Pocatello Zoo", all it's got is two bears that they caught over at the dump, couple bobcats that got stuck in the mayor's chicken coop, and a raccoon named "Mr. Waddles".

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Stim
Date: 22 Apr 13 - 12:05 AM

You may say "I ain't never been to that there "zoo" in Idaho Falls." Rap, but police surveillance cameras tell a different story. The judge didn't buy it either which is why the Pocatello bookmobile is up on cinder blocks until August 23.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 21 Apr 13 - 11:38 PM

not even a appaloosa rhinosaucerous?

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Apr 13 - 11:05 PM

I ain't never been to that there "zoo" in Idaho Falls. We got us a good zoo, a REAL zoo, right here in Pocatello. We don't have any of them "Brindled Pandas" or "Pinto Elephants" or whatever. We sure don't have no Pan Troglodytes. Used to, but they got too damned uppity and we had to deal with 'em in the old-fashioned way. We'd deal with Chonga just like we dealt with the rest of 'em iffen Chonga was stupid enough to come 'round.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Stim
Date: 21 Apr 13 - 08:56 PM

The Red Panda, too? He's kind of mottled.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 21 Apr 13 - 07:58 PM

I mean the whole mottled crue!!

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Stim
Date: 21 Apr 13 - 07:37 PM

Do you mean Rapparee?

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 21 Apr 13 - 06:54 PM

What do you expect from a pigmy marmoset passing as a monkey?

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Stim
Date: 21 Apr 13 - 02:31 AM

Sorry, Rap, ain't what I heard. Word on the street is that you "borrowed" Chongo's Ford Cortina and smashed it into the Red Panda cage at the Tautphaus Park Zoo in Idaho Falls.
The Red Panda blamed Chongo and hasn't spoken to him since, and the Cortina was beyond "Rapaire"--

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Apr 13 - 11:10 PM

I discovered the Truth About Chonga. Sex change operation coerced from a poor missionary doctor by an unkept promise of big money for the medical mission, forced his/her mother and twin sister Chinga into the sex trade so s/he could get money for first-class passage to the US and then abandoned them, her/his mother died of shame and broken heart.... About as sordid morass of lies as any politician ever covered up. Makes the Teapot Doame, the Grant administration, Watergate and Iran/Contra look like Sunday school classes.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Stim
Date: 20 Apr 13 - 11:34 AM

It's time to end this feud with Rapparee, Chongo--what happened between you two, anyway? We remember that he was your running mate, back before he learned how to spell his name. Chongo names Rapaire as his VP!!!

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Rapparee (without cookie for some reason)
Date: 19 Apr 13 - 12:29 PM

I just read the title of this thread as

"What cruelties in Chongo do you admire?"

Ya know, I think that's a lot more appropriate. (NOTE: I did not start another thread using that title.)

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 19 Apr 13 - 10:06 AM

He had his Mafia pals straighten them out, that's what.

You r nuts to incinerate that ole blue eyes was a chiropracter.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Apr 13 - 09:57 AM

Aaaaaaaaaaand...Chonga strikes out big time when compared to Sinatra.

1. S/He doesn't know any wise guys, not being wise him/herself.
2. The only "bad" s/he has played with was after s/he had diarrhea.
3. S/He can only make "music" after a dinner of beer and cabbage.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 19 Apr 13 - 03:01 AM

You got a sick mind, buster, but I know you ain't really as twisted as you pretend to be. If you was, the guys in the white suits woulda taken you away a long time ago.

You know what Frank Sinatra did with guys like you? He had his Mafia pals straighten them out, that's what. Frank liked playin' with the bad boys. The wise guys. But at least he made some good music.

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 19 Apr 13 - 12:12 AM

As I recall I remember seeing a piece of boogerart at a hot dog stand under the el at the stop by the Sears Tower. Not the type of place you go to enjoy your food. The owner had noticed that Chongo had been coming in every day and leaving a "calling card" under the table in a booth. After a few weeks the owner looked under the table and found a near perfect bas relief replica of the "scream" except of course the "screamer" was pygmy marmoset, the only colors were gray and green and it had "my mom the day I was born" scrawled in red at the bottom. It made pretty much everyone urge a little when the figured out what he used for the red.

Anyway its probably still there hangin' there. Right over the door preserved with a weekly coating of lemon Pledge and dead flies. It ain't pretty but it sure is a conversation piece.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 18 Apr 13 - 11:38 PM

It pains me to say this, Rap, but Chongo comes off as considerably more mature in his comments than you do! ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Apr 13 - 10:08 PM

No, Chonga, you were talking about that big booger, not Bogart. You called it "Booger art" but spelled it wrong.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 18 Apr 13 - 06:32 PM

Jack, LH did mention Pink back there somewhere, but what has that got to do with me? He has his opinions, I have mine, and they often differ, see? We are as unalike as Woody Allen and Clint Eastwood, fer Chrissake! (And I ain't the "Woody" half...) I said Bogart was still cool. You responded and said Pink ain't Bogart.

No kidding!!!!! And the Pope ain't Muslim! And pigs don't fly.

Gimme a break. It's LH who was talkin' about Pink...not me. I was talkin' about Bogart.

You gotta stop confusin' the two of us.

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 18 Apr 13 - 06:09 PM

"From: Little Hawk - PM
Date: 17 Apr 13 - 11:08 AM

Yeah? So...who do you think he should be getting calls from, Jack? Pink? Rihanna? Shakira? Eminem? "

"Jack - You mentioned Pink for some reason. I got no interest whatsoever in Pink. She don't rate higher than a stray dog in my view of the world.

- Chongo "

Little Hawk brought up "Pink.", Don't you think it is time that you two communicated? At least read what the other has written?

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 18 Apr 13 - 05:58 PM

That's right! I've seen gangs of Chimps tear librarians limb from limb. Caution is the best policy. The Chimp you insult today could be the Chimp who puts flowers on your grave tomorrow as a sign of mild regret...or just to be nice to yer bereaved relatives.

Jack - You mentioned Pink for some reason. I got no interest whatsoever in Pink. She don't rate higher than a stray dog in my view of the world.

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Stim
Date: 18 Apr 13 - 03:41 PM

You'd better rein it in a bit, Rapparee. Chongo is a master of restraint, but when push comes to shove, the other chimps step in, and I've seen what they do to librarians.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Apr 13 - 03:06 PM

Neither is Chonga.

I think that I admire the fact that Chonga pulled out the biggest booger in history -- had to use both hands and one foot.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 18 Apr 13 - 01:38 PM

Bogart IS cool.

Pink ain't Bogart.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 18 Apr 13 - 11:29 AM

"Cool" ain't got an expiry date on it, Jack. Not if it's the real deal. Bogart is still cool, and always will be.

Anyways, I am touched by all the kind compliments and recognition I have received on this thread. I'm also pleased about the specist insults and stuff from my detractors, cos it helps gather more info so the Ape Homeland Security can deal with 'em after I'm elected. See?

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 18 Apr 13 - 11:02 AM

When have you ever been this cool?

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 18 Apr 13 - 10:58 AM

"Yeah? So...who do you think he should be getting calls from, Jack? Pink? Rihanna? Shakira? Eminem? "

Those people MAY have been cool in the early 2000's

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Apr 13 - 09:34 AM

Chonga has known many Hollywood personalities: Johnny "The Wad" Holmes, Fatty Arbuckle, Joan Crawford, Ronald Reagan, Cheetah, Mr. Ed, Francis the Talking Mule, Minnie Mouse, Daisy Duck, Ma Kettle, Liberace. And when I say "has known" I mean in a purely biblical sense.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: gnu
Date: 18 Apr 13 - 05:58 AM

Sounds rather severe to me.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 17 Apr 13 - 11:32 AM

Typical. Chongo knows all those entertainment people. Too bad it didn't work out, though. He'd have been a great manager.

He also talks to Sarah Palin regularly. Or at least he did until his gal pal Renata threatened to cut his balls off if he didn't severe the connection.

Subject: RE: BS: What qualities in Chongo do you admire?
From: GUEST,Stim
Date: 17 Apr 13 - 11:26 AM

Speaking of the people that call Chongo--From what I understand, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson was contemplating a return to wrestling, and had wanted Chongo to act as his ringside manager. They'd worked up an agreement in principle that was to be based on the old "Chongomania" concept, but Chongo's original backers demanded too large a cut and the project was scrapped.