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BS: Breastfeeding In Public

GUEST,Eliza 23 Mar 14 - 06:03 AM
Dave the Gnome 23 Mar 14 - 05:21 AM
akenaton 23 Mar 14 - 05:03 AM
GUEST,Musket 23 Mar 14 - 03:57 AM
McGrath of Harlow 22 Mar 14 - 10:41 PM
Joe Offer 22 Mar 14 - 10:26 PM
Steve Shaw 22 Mar 14 - 10:11 PM
Ebbie 22 Mar 14 - 09:54 PM
Steve Shaw 22 Mar 14 - 09:45 PM
frogprince 22 Mar 14 - 09:39 PM
akenaton 22 Mar 14 - 09:11 PM
Steve Shaw 22 Mar 14 - 05:46 PM
Stilly River Sage 22 Mar 14 - 04:48 PM
Dave the Gnome 22 Mar 14 - 03:33 PM
GUEST,Musket 22 Mar 14 - 08:15 AM
GUEST,Troubadour 22 Mar 14 - 07:40 AM
maeve 22 Mar 14 - 07:40 AM
maeve 22 Mar 14 - 07:38 AM
akenaton 22 Mar 14 - 05:37 AM
GUEST,Eliza 22 Mar 14 - 05:11 AM
GUEST,Shimrod 22 Mar 14 - 04:11 AM
GUEST,Musket 22 Mar 14 - 03:52 AM
GUEST,Stim 21 Mar 14 - 11:54 PM
Steve Shaw 21 Mar 14 - 09:44 PM
olddude 21 Mar 14 - 08:52 PM
maeve 21 Mar 14 - 08:40 PM
GUEST,Troubadour 21 Mar 14 - 08:08 PM
GUEST,Eliza 21 Mar 14 - 03:31 PM
Greg F. 21 Mar 14 - 03:04 PM
Uncle_DaveO 21 Mar 14 - 02:29 PM
GUEST,Eliza 21 Mar 14 - 01:44 PM
GUEST,major mudcat 21 Mar 14 - 01:08 PM
GUEST,Musket 21 Mar 14 - 12:58 PM
Steve Shaw 21 Mar 14 - 12:45 PM
Stilly River Sage 21 Mar 14 - 11:27 AM
Dave the Gnome 21 Mar 14 - 10:50 AM
Steve Shaw 21 Mar 14 - 10:38 AM
akenaton 21 Mar 14 - 09:33 AM
Dave the Gnome 21 Mar 14 - 09:12 AM
eddie1 21 Mar 14 - 06:49 AM
Musket 21 Mar 14 - 06:30 AM
GUEST,Eliza 21 Mar 14 - 06:10 AM
Musket 21 Mar 14 - 06:00 AM
GUEST,Eliza 21 Mar 14 - 03:49 AM
Janie 20 Mar 14 - 11:22 PM
GUEST,bbc on vacation 20 Mar 14 - 11:04 PM
McGrath of Harlow 20 Mar 14 - 10:48 PM
Janie 20 Mar 14 - 10:35 PM
frogprince 20 Mar 14 - 10:19 PM
Steve Shaw 20 Mar 14 - 09:49 PM

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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 23 Mar 14 - 06:03 AM

I have looked up the law in England (as opposed to Scotland) which was enacted as late as 2010, and it forbids discrimination against any woman feeding her child in any place at all. So the law is supportive. But the women I read about were so embarrassed and humiliated that they hadn't the courage to tell the objectors to go and boil their heads, law or no law. I think it's brilliant and quite funny that a huge gang of feeders arrived and swamped the place, breasts a-waving! It's a peaceful and pertinent demonstration. I know that if I ever saw a lady being hassled like that, I'd speak up. I can be extremely fierce at times!


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 23 Mar 14 - 05:21 AM

It was not obvious to me, ake. And your explanation just sounds like you are trying to justify a long outdated attitude.

I think many silly women turn this into a "feminist" issue, just to cause a fuss.

reads, to me, like you are saying that many (your word, not mine) women who do not like being told to leave or go and feed their child in the toilet are silly to complain. How many is 'many'? Is it a majority? A large minority? What? And there you go again with quotes. Why is it a "feminist" issue and not a feminist issue? It is an act that ONLY women can do so it can only ever be feminist. Without the quotes.


DtG


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: akenaton
Date: 23 Mar 14 - 05:03 AM

Ebbie...now you're being a "silly woman". :0)

I was actually repeating the views of my wife, who breast fed our family.

I cannot believe that you were not aware of that, as I had made it clear earlier.....a bit of attempted point scoring perhaps?

However, I am magnanimous enough to accept an apology ...if offered.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: GUEST,Musket
Date: 23 Mar 14 - 03:57 AM

SRS. I refer to the posts I have checked to see they exist, not the ones that occasionally get lost in the ether. Ditto whole threads I have started.

There are more than just you moderating, don't take it personally.

There's no problem feeling uncomfortable in the company of a feeding mother. You are what you are and are guided by your upbringing and experience.

The problem is when you project that uneasiness where it is neither appreciated nor helpful. In this case, it says more about the state of mind of the offended than the "liberal" actions of the mother. I didn't know that only feminists breast fed. You live and learn. (Or continue to vindicate earlier weighing up of certain people.)


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 10:41 PM

The notion of a mass breast feed in a restaurant does seem rather to be taking the babies for granted. Babies like to feed when they like to feed, not according to the needs of a demo timetable. It's an individual thing.

When a restaurant needs teaching a lesson about such things, a picket makes more sense.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Joe Offer
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 10:26 PM

I guess that I have to admit that I have difficulty carrying on an intelligent discussion in the presence of a woman with bare breasts, whether she's breastfeeding or on the beach. Rapparee suggests "a light blanket goes a long way," and I agree. Diapers work just fine, too. I've rarely been in the presence of a breastfeeding woman who is exposed to the point where I feel uncomfortable, so I see this as kind of a non-issue. And whatever the case, I think it's horrible if a woman is made to feel she has to go to the loo to feed her child. That seems downright unsanitary.

-Joe-


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 10:11 PM

Hooray, Ebbie.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Ebbie
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 09:54 PM

"Its a two way bonding process, as well as a means of getting nutrition into an infant, as such it is private and personal.
I don't think anyone gets upset over the sight of a bare breast, it's more about the deeper emotions involved for mother and child." ake

You know, ake, your exhortation reminds me that what is "silly" is a MAN telling WOMEN what a woman feels.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 09:45 PM

He hasn't learned it, has he?


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: frogprince
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 09:39 PM

"Eliza's example, of a mass breast feed at a restaurant which asked a nursing mother to go into a private room, is silliness personified."

Almost as bad as a bunch of darkies lining up at a southern lunch counter where they know full well they're not wanted.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: akenaton
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 09:11 PM

Dave, read my post again.
"I think many silly women turn this into a "feminist" issue, just to cause a fuss."

The meaning was obvious when I first posted it, there ARE silly women, just as there ARE silly men.....that does not signify that ALL women are silly.
I don't believe this should be turned into a "feminist" issue, but that does not signify that I think ALL feminist issues are silly.
Eliza's example, of a mass breast feed at a restaurant which asked a nursing mother to go into a private room, is silliness personified.

I have not changed my views in the slightest.

Do you honestly think that all "liberal" issues are sensible?


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 05:46 PM

I suspect though that you have just learned that you should not say these things in public.

Yes, one hopes so. But one thing's for sure: if he has learned it, he learned it from us, not a Mudcat moderator.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 04:48 PM

Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: GUEST,Musket - PM
151.227.6.112
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 03:52 AM

Dear moderator . . .


Dear Musket, none of your posts were deleted or edited here. It must have gotten lost in the ether. You should save a copy before hitting send or compose them in another program.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 03:33 PM

Credit where credit is due. Well done, ake. You have gone from

I think many silly women turn this into a "feminist" issue, just to cause a fuss.

to

Don't see what all the stooshie is about, there are silly men and silly women in all sectors of society, all feminist issues are not "silly".

Within the course of this thread.

I do hope that you have genuinely learned that 'silly women' with 'feminist issues' is an attitude that should have died out years ago. I suspect though that you have just learned that you should not say these things in public. I hope that I am wrong.

DtG


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: GUEST,Musket
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 08:15 AM

I don't think he needs to answer that. I could though...

Let's not upset the bigotry fairies though eh?

I am sitting in a cafe at the moment. A lady is feeding her baby. I don't see people sat with their arms folded trying to look offended though.

Most of society is decent you see. People who enjoy being offended or those who use such offence to justify their sad bitter existence don't tend to be in the majority.

On the flight back from Dublin on Thursday I was sat in front of a screaming baby. I wish the mother had breast fed then.....


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: GUEST,Troubadour
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 07:40 AM

"Its a two way bonding process, as well as a means of getting nutrition into an infant, as such it is private and personal."

When you are ten miles from home and said infant is shrieking at the top of its voice for a feed, it is PRECISELY about "getting nutrition into an infant".

What would you suggest?.......All nursing mothers to confine themselves to home, or use the insanitary facilities provided for disposal of bodily wastes?

Why is it that you always profess to have such altruistic and high minded motives for your most noxious contributions?


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: maeve
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 07:40 AM

Drat- thought my late night post with the song links hadn't taken- sorry for re-posting unnecessarily!


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: maeve
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 07:38 AM

Humor/humour is more effective than stridency. Two singers I admire greatly for this approach are:

Cindy Kallet "I'm a Mammal" Lyrics here "I'm a Mammal" (listen here)

And Janet Russell    "Breastfeeding Baby in the Park" (lyrics) "Breastfeeding Baby in the Park" (listen here)


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: akenaton
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 05:37 AM

Don't see what all the stooshie is about, there are silly men and silly women in all sectors of society, all feminist issues are not "silly".

I think this particular one has been over hyped, and the true purpose of breast feeding ignored.
Its a two way bonding process, as well as a means of getting nutrition into an infant, as such it is private and personal.
I don't think anyone gets upset over the sight of a bare breast, it's more about the deeper emotions involved for mother and child.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 05:11 AM

I agree with Troubadour that staff at dining establishments and waiting rooms etc can hardly complain 'on behalf' of others, assuming that these 'others' object to breastfeeding without actually asking them. It reminds me of the quite mad 'Winterval' substitute for Christmas, in an attempt not to offend Muslims, who stridently pointed out they weren't in the least offended anyway. The 2 song lyrics posted by maeve are very good, especially the point that 'page 3' ladies can bare all for sexual titillation (sorry!) but a simple feeding activity is found to be indecent in some way. Those that say the baby can wait, or the mother should go in a toilet, or slip a shawl over herself (shades of Muslim veils here) make me cross. Why the blazes should she? I must look up the exact wording of the law for England on all this, and see if it's the same as the excellent one of 2005 in Scotland.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: GUEST,Shimrod
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 04:11 AM

I was on the top deck of a bus the other day and spotted a young woman, with a long, diaphanous shawl around her shoulders, sat at a pavement cafe having a coffee. I suddenly realised that the shawl was to protect her 'modesty' and that under it she was breast feeding her baby. There was nothing, even vaguely, offensive about this sight - I thought that it was rather pleasing and she looked rather beautiful and elegant. My only slight concern was that I should respect her privacy and didn't want her to catch me staring - so looked away.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: GUEST,Musket
Date: 22 Mar 14 - 03:52 AM

Dear moderator

When you censor my posts, please remove the one that accidentally posted before I got anywhere with the typing as well.

After all, we can't have the boys and girls thinking I said something, can we?

I bet you can't think whose comments I questioned?

Sick puppy


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: GUEST,Stim
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 11:54 PM

I am amazed that people sit quiet through ethnic cleansing, forced famine, drone attacks and such things, and then fuss when a woman feeds a baby. That's just me, though...


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 09:44 PM

Steve Shaw opined:

babies need to be fed, but it is not unreasonable to pay attention to the feelings of others in society.

Fair enough, as far as it goes.


For the record, Dave, Steve Shaw opined no such thing. That was Akenaton, a bloke whose views on this and on many other matters are as far removed from mine as can be. Thank you.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: olddude
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 08:52 PM

Well my daughter uses a blanket but when a creep starts taking photos or trying to then grandpa has a conversation that involves some form of violence as I mentioned in my thread his cell phone didn't fair well


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: maeve
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 08:40 PM

Cindy Kallet's classic take on the issue:

http://cindykallet.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/Im-a-Mammal.pdf

And another classic, by Janet Russell:

"Breastfeeding Babies in the Park"

(Both links for lyrics only- well worth digging up a recording online or on a cd. No time now, but I can help with both.)


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: GUEST,Troubadour
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 08:08 PM

I'm with Eliza on this! Back in the late sixties and early seventies when my wife was breast feeding my daghter and then my son, for a short time both at once, we never had any comment at all from bystanders, who accepted it as a normal part of existence. Some averted their gaze, some took a quick and slightly apologetic peek, none of which bothered my wife.

But nobody EVER complained.

By the time that my daughter was breast feeding her first, she was directed to some quite insanitary places (toilets etc.), by staff who were ASSUMING that customers MIGHT be offended.

Now, I don't mind anybody coming to me and saying "This, or that, sight is offensive to me".

I may, or may not, take notice!

But there is one thing that will elicit a vigorous and vociferous response from me (and not in a good way), and that is when anyone professes to be offended on behalf of someone else, or some nebulous group.

He will hear MY expression of displeasure, and so will everybody else within earshot of a hypothetical bomb blast.

Such was the case when dining out with daughter on more than one occasion. Some complainers still remember how quickly a venue can be emptied.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 03:31 PM

Well it has. As I've just said, if people can be persuaded that breastfeeding is not 'nice' in public, mums may feel more comfortable using a bottle. This means more formula milk sold, and profits for the companies that manufacture it. And why use the expression 'bugger all'? You sound a bit cross, but I can't see why.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Greg F.
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 03:04 PM

We haven't yet touched on the issue of milk-formula companies having a vested interest in promoting bottle over the breast.

Probably because that has bugger-all to do with the point under discussion.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 02:29 PM

Steve Shaw opined:

babies need to be fed, but it is not unreasonable to pay attention to the feelings of others in society.

Fair enough, as far as it goes.

But equally, it is not reasonable to expect slavish obedience
to the demands of others in society just because of their prurient
personal feelings.

"Pay attention", yes; "obey", no.

Dave Oesterreich


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 01:44 PM

We haven't yet touched on the issue of milk-formula companies having a vested interest in promoting bottle over the breast. I notice they've invented 'follow-up milk' now, as they know full well women understand the importance of breast milk for their babies. I imagine they'd be ever so delighted if women were ashamed to breastfeed in public and chose a bottle instead.
Sorry akenaton if I branded you as a doddery old thing. As I'm one, I tend to treat everyone else like that too. Many apologies! :)
I agree with major mudcat about naturism and nothing being shameful. The trouble is, cultural taboos prevent such a total commitment to nature. In Africa, legs are totally taboo. A lady can go around topless all day (and they often do) but if she wears a shortish skirt instead of the pagne (traditional wrap-around cloth, maxi length) people will jeer and spit on her. A kindly neighbour will run out with a spare pagne and wrap it round her for decency (so my husband tells me).
If I became a naturist, people would have terrible nightmares. My bottom alone would blot out the sun and be a danger to traffic.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: GUEST,major mudcat
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 01:08 PM

Why should not women breast feed in public, why should not we all walk around naked? I do not get upset by women breast feeding.
As a naturist,I also believe we should be allowed to wak round stark naked.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: GUEST,Musket
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 12:58 PM

Odd j


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 12:45 PM

Helloo? I don't recall being the one referring to silly women turning it into a feminist issue just to annoy us tender souls who might actually get an outrageous glimpse of disgusting bare breast (if we stare hard enough). You know, I'd have thought that one of the points of a forum which discusses controversial issues is that we can express sharp intolerance of illiberal views emanating from backwoodsmen, such as the one above. Like I said, you have better targets if you really want targets.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 11:27 AM

You're the one trying to make an argument, Steve, instead of simply accepting akenaton's point of view and moving on. He thinks it's complicated - and it is, in some ways. Breastfeeding is the easiest way to feed a baby, but cultural barriers were erected by those who chose the bottle decades ago and new generations are rethinking that artificial standard and the health complications that arose from cows milk and formula. They are accustomed to the artificial methods of feeding babies, and I would guess that people protest nursing in public spaces (discretely or not) because they don't know better. Educating them is complicated.

SRS


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 10:50 AM

What 'gang of 3' and what liberal doctrine, ake? Am I included and is it the doctrine that says statements like "I think many silly women turn this into a "feminist" issue, just to cause a fuss." are no longer socially acceptable?

I have already said it is a complex issue about balancing the needs of a mother and child and social acceptability. I also agree that It should not be used as a political weapon but, by your saying this, you imply that there a significant number of 'silly women' doing the same. What did you expect the reaction to labeling breast feeding mothers as 'silly women' would be? Did you not stop to consider the offense you may cause to any women on here who have breast fed in public and endured the type of abuse that you are happy to repeat?

Maybe you are one of those stupid men who turn this into a "PC gone mad" issue just to cause a fuss? You know you once commented that you had very little basic education? Have you not heard the phrase that you are never too old to learn? Maybe it is time you started.

DtG


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 10:38 AM

It is not a complex issue at all. A complex issue is sterilising a bottle, having a supply of sterile water at just the right temperature, especially if you're out and about, measuring the right amount of (second-rate) feed to mix, making sure the teat is germ-free and holding it at the correct angle to the baby's mouth until your arm nearly drops off. That's what I call complex. Alternatively, you expose your breast and put the baby to it. That's what I call simple. So simple, in fact, that even a baby can do it. And I can't remember ever seeing a woman whip out her breast for her baby in order to use it as a political weapon. Generally speaking, they seem to do it in order to feed the baby. It's illiberal people like you who turn perfectly natural things into "political issues".


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: akenaton
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 09:33 AM

I'm not THAT bloody old Eliza. :0)

The point I was making was explained to me by my wife, who reckons that breast feeding is part of the mother and child bonding process, and involves much more than just filling the child's belly.
It is and very personal relationship, giving both to mother AND child, and involving touch, sounds and satisfaction through feeding.
It should not be used as a political weapon to gain feminist status, to do so is a form of abuse.
The ideology of "self" seems to be everywhere, look how the gang of three can't wait to dive on every remark or statement that they think they can demonise.....pitiful.
I like to discuss all issues, this thread has nothing to do with homosexuality , but the "liberal" doctrine hides in every thread, waiting to pounce.

These issues are always much more complex than we think, and involve complex emotional reactions....certainly too complex to be pigeon holed by idiotic political activists.....male or female.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 09:12 AM

Another one of those silly feminists I suppose :-S

Absolutely preposterous.

DtG


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: eddie1
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 06:49 AM

I had a studio guest + baby on my radio programme. The baby was getting a bit fractious (and probably bored). In the middle of the interview, and without a break in her contribution, she breast fed her baby.
I actually felt quite privileged that she considered this OK in my presence!

The baby does not have too much choice in deciding when she/he is going to be hungry and can't be talked out of it. Provided the mother is not driving or in any other potentially dangerous situation - go for it! If anyone is offended, look away or go somewhere else!

Eddie


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Musket
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 06:30 AM

Men's interest is entirely natural, as you say.

I am full square behind any attempt to shout down people who enjoy being outraged. They love controlling others and a plague on their houses.

I just needed to point out that no matter how much it is a norm, feeding mothers will always have to put up with the odd glance. I don't see how instinct can be removed. Breasts are objects of supreme fascination to many men. I even went as far as marrying a breast surgeon!

For the record, legs, bums and red high heels have to be factored in too with most of us.

We are simple souls at heart.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 06:10 AM

Well, there again Musket, men's interest is also entirely natural. What I dislike is people tutting and moving the poor little mum on, or shoving her into a toilet in disgrace to nurse. I can't see why people get their knickers in such a twist. (Oh dear, mustn't mention knickers either I suppose! tee hee) Luckily for me I am very well-endowed in the bottom department, so my husband is quite content!


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Musket
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 06:00 AM

Don't mention that men like bottoms Eliza! You'll have our resident Major Misunderstanding embarrass himself again by taking it out of context ;-)

It has to be said though. It is commendable to remove stigma and nonsense over offence in this necessary function. But what you can't either legislate for nor socially condition is the reflex action of most men to quickly cast a glance. Sorry, it is instinct not conscious action. It ain't going alter either. So long as we don't exacerbate our position by asking that if you are selling those puppies, I'll have the one with the pink nose, I am sure we can reach a consensus.

Funnily enough, at the time most of us actually think women are impressed that our eyes are cast slightly downwards when chatting them up.

Granted, we have much to learn.









Officer.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 21 Mar 14 - 03:49 AM

Perhaps I should have added to my original post that the 'fracas' here in UK started when a mum breastfed outside a pub and the manager came out and chased her away. The upshot was that a large (20 or so) angry group of militant mums arrived and overtly breastfed their babies on the same spot. Apparently, this has happened a few times when a mum has been made to feel ashamed like this; a Swat team of nursing militants arrive in droves and do the deed waving placards and flaunting slogan-printed T shirts etc. I find this amusing and quite see their point of view. If people continue to persecute a lone mum in this way, then maybe a huge group of insistent ladies will turn the tide. I'm really heartened by the responses here on Mudcat. And I'm delighted with the 2005 Scottish Law enacted to protect mums from persecution. Having experienced the African way of life, I can see how daft our Westernised uptight attitudes actually are. I'm not sure about weeing in public, although in W Africa it's always accepted any old where. I had to quickly explain to my husband when he arrived in UK that he must not have a casual wee on the street. But that's different because it's unhygienic. I suppose the bottom line is, I hate to see anyone made to feel ashamed and upset for merely tending to her child and doing nobody any harm. By the way, my husband assures me that breasts are of absolutely no interest to men there. They are not a sexual turn on, any more than one's nose or one's ears! It's bottoms they like. Interesting that.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Janie
Date: 20 Mar 14 - 11:22 PM

I hope this isn't too much thread drift. I think it is related. I used the word 'conservative' above and also 'puritan.' Now realizing those are not necessarily the salient descriptors, based on my own experience.

My grandparents were United/Old Regular Baptists, through and through. Folks in the USA will probably know what that means, though maybe not folks from across the pond. Very strict/ modest/this is right this is wrong. Morally very conservative though not politically conservative. And very practical people. My grandmother died at age 93 exactly 2 months after my son was born. The entire time at her wake, he was on my breast - he was colickly and fussy otherwise. The deacon had us form a prayer circle - intense and fervent experience with Old Regular Baptists - and my gassy infant kept cadence with the prayer, farting more frequently and loudly as the fervor of the prayer intensified. We heathens and the old-line old Testament, and mostly quite elderly Christians smiled and giggled throughout without embarrassment or condemnation. After the prayer circle I retreated a little bit to a quiet corner and kept my son at my breast - he was content latched on to my breast, whether snoozing or actively nursing - as opposed to squalling like a banshee otherwise at that tender time of his gastric and attachment development. I was discreet and respectful and also obviously had a baby at my breast. All those country folks, 'conservative' as can be, 'puritan' as can be by conventional definition, but especially the eldest or the 'countriest', made sure to seek me out to offer their condolences, and to comment on and admire the youngest of my grandmother's line without exhibiting any discomfort or inhibition whatsoever at approaching a mother with a child at her breast. Maybe it is the difference between country folks and city folks, I don't know. But I do know how very morally conservative and biblically literal were the tribe and church of my grandparents. But to them, a babe at the breast of a mother was nothing to shun or to avert one's eyes from - at least providing there is nothing exhibitionist in the 'tableau.' A nursing mother was as normal and natural to them as a nursing calf or sheep.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: GUEST,bbc on vacation
Date: 20 Mar 14 - 11:04 PM

My kids are now 29 & 32, but, when they were babies, I nursed each of them for an extended time. I fed them when they needed to be fed (or for comfort), regardless of where we were. I did, however, wear loose tops that would "blouse" over my breast, for modesty's sake. In this, as in many things, I think some balance makes sense.

Best,

Barbara


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 20 Mar 14 - 10:48 PM

Well Pope Francis recently told mother in the Sistine Chapel to go ahead and breastfeed them.

"Today the choir will sing, but the most beautiful choir of all is the choir of the infants who will make a noise. Some will cry because they are not comfortable or because they are hungry," Francis said, according to Reuters. "If they are hungry, mothers, feed them, without thinking twice. Because they are the most important people here."


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Janie
Date: 20 Mar 14 - 10:35 PM

I guess I'm quite surprised this is still, on occasion, an issue. I was 42 when I had my kid, who is now a young man, and never encountered any problems or askance glances when I was breast feeding, lo! those many years ago.

Never made a public spectacle of it, never seemed to attract much attention. It is really very easy to breast feed an infant in a public space while remaining modest and/or respecting the reasonably modest sensibilities that one might anticipate other, perhaps more conservative, folks might have when breastfeeding in public. (not the same as surreptitious, btw.)

I understand that cultural norms vary. I don't know the circumstances that have resulted in the uproar to which Eliza refers and don't want to make assumptions. I suppose it is possible that some folks want to make a "statement" and may be rather exhibitionist about breast feeding. Also, in places much more diverse in terms of nationalities and immigrants than where I have lived, there may be some cultural differences of which an immigrant to more western puritan environs may be unaware.

Where I lived and where I went at that time, which is all I know about, there perhaps were and still are people who were/are outraged by a woman breastfeeding an infant in public under any circumstance, but I never had anyone comment or complain "to management" in a public place, and I don't think that is the norm in most places and venues I am likely to find myself.   

Dress appropriately for the occasion, I always say, and when breast feeding, wear a nice scarf for insurance. Takes just a little education to understand what to wear on the upper torso to make breast feeding in public a discreet enterprise.

I also would think that most folks in a public place would prefer to share space with a quiet, nursing child in the booth, on the bus, or at the table beside them than to a screaming, hungry infant.


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: frogprince
Date: 20 Mar 14 - 10:19 PM

Actually I still like nibbling on those things, but my wife won't let me do it in public...


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Subject: RE: BS: Breastfeeding In Public
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 20 Mar 14 - 09:49 PM

I find it pretty normal myself.


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