Songs about breakups, breaking up

Subject: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: JenEllen
Date: 10 May 00 - 10:46 PM

Yup, that horrible topic....Break-Ups. What songs set you free after the relationship goes south????

My best friend and I were laughing ourselves sick because my never-fail break-up ritual has been completed once again. Goes a little something like this:

The break-up conversation with the dialog from Pee-Wee's Big Adventure. "There's things about me you wouldn't understand, things you couldn't understand, things you SHOULDN'T understand....I'm a loner (insert name), a rebel...." (I swear, if there was ever a guy who said "Wait a minute...isn't that PeeWee?" I'd keep him...)

Then, it goes straight to music:
That Hank Williams-y 'I had someone else before I had you, and I'll have someone after you're gone'
Nanci Griffith 'When ya can't find a friend you've still got the radio'
Girls Night Out
Don't Fence Me In
Ode to Joy
Kate Wolf's 'Safe at Anchor'
MLK Jr's 'Thank Gawd Almighty Free at Last' speech
.....etc

~Elle

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: paddymac
Date: 10 May 00 - 11:01 PM

Hmmmm - how about "So long, it's been good to know ya". Or my personal fav - "I would'a wrote ya a letter but I couldn't spell yecccchhhh"

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: katlaughing
Date: 10 May 00 - 11:02 PM

Isn't there one about "Don't let the door slam ya in the ass on yer way out!"**BG**

It's been a long time, Elle, let me think, um....HE could sing that Hank Wm's great "Move it On Over" and go sleep in the doghouse for good!

For real support, I'd go listen to some strong wimmin like Ferron, Holly Near, kd lang, Melissa Etheridge, Sweet Honey in the Rock, Tina Turner OR, you could join us in HearMe and wail away some bluesy kind of thing!

Do something nice for yourself and your heart, darlin'

luvyakat

Subject: Lyr Add: YOUR SECRET (James Keelaghan)
From: Clinton Hammond2
Date: 10 May 00 - 11:03 PM

From James Keelaghans ROAD cd...

Your Secret

I walked out on a winters night
I felt like I was driven
A bundle tucked beneath my arm
A debt to be forgiven
I turned up 14th street and climbed
Above the distant traffics roar
Reached a crest and dropped my bag
I won't be your secret anymore

I lit a fire on the hill
The winter snow had drifted high
I watched the smoke from letters spill
Into the ink black midnight sky
Your words were mingled with the stars
Every line you wrote that I adored
Time has come for this to end
I won't be your secret anymore

I next threw on the things you gave
All of those well though out gifts
They were enfolded in the blaze
They turned to smoke and up they drift
Photographs and poetry
Those chimes I hung outside my door
Reduced to ash and memory
I won't be your secret anymore

I stayed until the fire died
That was shortly after sunrise
I tried to burn the memories
But they still smolder deep inside
Slaves they say revere their chains
Prisoners fear the open door
I know one day that I'll be free
And I won't be your secret anymore

{~`

Subject: Lyr Add: LOVE WILL ENDURE^^
From: catspaw49
Date: 10 May 00 - 11:16 PM

When first I came to town, I came in from the country
Not a penny did I have and not one cent could I offer
But still our love was new and our troubles they were few
They were few.

Many times I tried to tell you, all the hurt that I was feelin'
But my thoughts stumbled in my mind, and my words they lost their meanin'
I didn't mean to cause you pain, so I'm leavin' once again
Once again.

There's no need to think of me, I'll be happy where I'm goin'
I've got roots that need a plantin', and a love that needs a growin'
Where my pride won't have to bend and my lips can taste the wind
Taste the wind.

As for you the years will heal all the wounds that have been opened
Just like time will rid the fields of all the flowers that have ripened
Of all these things you can be sure.....Only love...
Will endure.

"Love Will Endure"----Patrick Sky

Spaw

Subject: Lyr Add: BUTTON OFF MY SHIRT (from Ronnie Milsap)
From: Mbo
Date: 10 May 00 - 11:45 PM

Oh, the classic is by Ronnie Milsap:

BUTTON OFF MY SHIRT
As recorded by Ronnie Milsap on "Heart and Soul" (1987)

I heard the word goin' 'round town.
They say that you're making a fool out of me.
Baby, it took me some time to come around
To realize you were not what you seemed.
Each day's passing; the clock's been my friend.
Help me get back on my feet again.

CHORUS: Like a button off of my shirt, tust an everyday distraction,
You'd be overreacting if you think that I still hurt.
You're just a button off of my shirt, and someday I will replace you.
I don't care what I have lost; you got what you deserve.

I was down, down, down
I was down....

I am not the first, and I won't be the last
To make the mistake of believing in you. (Listen to me now.)
I don't intend to live in the past.
Just like they say, some you win, some you lose.
You never loved me, and you made it plain.
Now it's my turn and I'm playing your game. CHORUS

Love and affection.
You started changing direction.
You threw it away.
Girl, you threw it away.

You never loved me, and you made it plain.
Now it's my turn to make you understand.

CHORUS 3X [The last time ending with "Someday I will replace you."]


--Mbo

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: MK
Date: 11 May 00 - 12:12 AM

Jump - Van Halen

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Brendy
Date: 11 May 00 - 12:18 AM

And remember that if you are drinking and driving, don't throw your empties out the window.

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: ddw
Date: 11 May 00 - 12:20 AM

I always sorta liked Ray Stevens's "Get Your Tongue Out of My Mouth, I'm Kissing You Goodbye."

But if she's not into subtle, Tom Rush's "No Regrets" makes a pretty good closing number.

david

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Amos
Date: 11 May 00 - 12:40 AM

Awwww, Jen....I am a tad sad for you, but maybe I shouldn't be.

Guess I'll write'cha litttle note, huh? Me, I like "Don't Think Twice, It's All Right!"

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Mark Cohen
Date: 11 May 00 - 01:11 AM

For many years Gordon Lightfoot's "If You Could Read My Mind" was my theme song; I always found myself saying, "I don't know where we went wrong but the feelin's gone and I just can't get it back." Then I got married and realized that "the feeling" was only a small part of what it was about, that you had to choose to love and continually make that commitment -- more like Kate Wolf's "Give Yourself to Love." Now at the end of the marriage I can see that I was half right -- the love and commitment have to flow in both directions. But I'm all right now, and I can sing any song I want. And so can you. Be good to yourself, find your own strength, and life will flow to you. As far as songs, I'd go with kat's advice, also Gordon Bok, and basically anything that makes you feel GOOD.

Aloha,
Mark

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 11 May 00 - 01:26 AM

Aw, JenEllen, everybody's got a big but. Let's talk about yours.

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Amergin
Date: 11 May 00 - 01:32 AM

I write about it. Sing about it. Do whatever it is I do and all the while thanking god for antidepressants.

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Racer
Date: 11 May 00 - 01:45 AM

"A Letter To Elise" by The Cure. I'd include the lyrics, but they're so long no one would read them. The song lasts about seven minutes, and Robert Smith apparently didn't want lyrical repetition in this song.

After I'm done depressing myself with The Cure, I'll usually move on to something happier like The Minutemen.

-Racer

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Ana
Date: 11 May 00 - 02:21 AM

Nick Cave - The Weeping Song

"This is a weeping song ...BUT I WON'T BE WEEPING LONG.."

XXAna

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Escamillo
Date: 11 May 00 - 02:28 AM

Why not internationalizing a little, and sing a famous tango ? :
Vitoria ! Saraca, Vitoria !
Pianté de la noria !
SE FUE MI MUJEEEEEERRR !!

(Victory ! Hey all ! Victory !!
Escaped the joke !
She´s GOOOONEEE!! )
(Insert the most slang word you may find instead of "Hey All" and "Escaped")
Un abrazo - Andrés

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: The Shambles
Date: 11 May 00 - 03:01 AM

Link to the (wonderful) Mudcat Songbook Move On Down The Line

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Escamillo
Date: 11 May 00 - 03:03 AM

Sorry, in my previous message, "joke" should be "yoke"

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Midchuck
Date: 11 May 00 - 06:25 AM

I have been married - happily about 98.426% of the time - to the same person for 33 years, the middle of next month; and we were "going out" for almost 5 years prior to that. So I can't contribute much to the discussion. Sorry I'm not more help.

Peter.

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: jeffp
Date: 11 May 00 - 07:13 AM

Roy Clark's "Thank God and Greyhound You're Gone"

jeffp

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Escamillo
Date: 11 May 00 - 07:17 AM

You are fortunate (and old) like me and many others, Midchuk. Somehow we were chosen for such a blessing. Let´s demonstrate them that we love them and their lives have been well invested.
Un abrazo - Andrés (28 years next December)

Subject: Lyr Add: YOU MADE THIS LOVE A TEARDROP
From: GUEST,Timbrel
Date: 11 May 00 - 07:38 AM

Another Nancy Griffith song: YOU MADE THIS LOVE A TEARDROP.

What have got to say for yourself, now baby blue?
Now that I am leaving you, what have you got to lose?
The truth you tried to keep from me,
Well it nearly drove me crazy.
I have grown weary from sleepless nights with you.
Is that a broken heart in the corner of your eye?
Something to remind you.

You made this love a teardrop waiting to fall.
There are those who can't love right; I just can't love wrong.
If you're lonely in the night I hope you will recall (?)
You made this love a teardrop waiting to fall.

I will not forgive you for betraying the trust between us
Though I will always care for you, I've loved you half my life.
And if I give my heart again, I know that I'll remember
Love is but a fragile flame and trust just fuels the fire
When I think of all the years your love has taken from me
I can't believe I'm leaving you...

-----also, any Patsy Cline!

HTML line breaks added --JoeClone, 10-Nov-01.

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Margaret V
Date: 11 May 00 - 08:40 AM

PeeWee's Big Adventure--- oh, JenEllen, I wish I had thought of that! Mind if I use it the next time (there will, of course, be a next time)?! Jane Siberry expresses everything brilliantly, and beautifully, and break-ups are no exception. On "The Walking" (1987)listen to "Red High Heels" and most especially "The Lobby." Also "Goodbye" and "The Walking." On "When I Was a Boy" (1993) listen to "Love is Everything." You can find the lyrics if you go to www.sheeba.ca/ and type "lyrics" in the search box.

From "Love is Everything": "Love is everything they said it would be, and love made sweet and sad the same, but love forgot to make me too blind to see you're chickening out, aren't you? You're banging on the beach like an old tin drum. I can't wait till you make the whole kingdom come so I'm leaving; I'm just leaving."

Of course in a completely different vein I also like James McMurtry's "Where'd You Hide the Body"; not precisely about the break-up itself but about all the behaviors leading to it. . .

Really there are too many possibilities to list here! Hope you're feeling okay. It's a big world out there, after all.

Margaret

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Mooh
Date: 11 May 00 - 09:35 AM

"Welcome to Dumpsville, population you."

Babe, I'm Gonna Leave You with Robert Plant singing "I ain't jokin' woman, I got to ramble..."

Peace, Mooh.

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Whistle Stop
Date: 11 May 00 - 10:39 AM

As long as we're in British Invasion territory, my personal favorite, for endings of all kinds, is "I'm Free" by the Who (off Tommy).

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: GUEST,Pete peterson
Date: 11 May 00 - 11:22 AM

I've always loved Roy Acuff's Two Different Worlds--
We live in two different worlds, dear, That's why we're so far apart
You made a world out of vows that were broken, I built a world in my heart

a long time ago was singing that down at the Mt. Airy music festival (first weekend in June, almosthere!) and saw the bluegrassers in their RVs down in the level spots and the old timey musicians in their tents on the hill, and what came out was
We live in two different worlds, dear, That's why it nevercan be
I want to camp in a tent in the open, You want a shiny RV
JenEllen I feel sad for you and happy for you at the same time; sometimes you have to kiss a lot of frogs before finding a prince.

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Bert
Date: 11 May 00 - 11:29 AM

In his musical 'Maggie May', Lionel Bart used 'Leave her Johnny leave her'

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: MAG (inactive)
Date: 11 May 00 - 11:47 AM

Eagles' "Already Gone"

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: MAG (inactive)
Date: 11 May 00 - 11:48 AM

Oh, and Sweet Honey's version of "Sittin' on top of the World"

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Hollowfox
Date: 11 May 00 - 12:19 PM

The two songs that have helped to bring a smile to my face during my breakup (this is Not A Bad Thing) have been "Farewell He" (in DT) and "Sun's Gonna Shine On My Back Door Some Day". May you enjoy your breakup as much as I'm enjoying mine.

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: GUEST,Mrr
Date: 11 May 00 - 12:29 PM

My issue has always been the time after the breakup when I can't stand any music the X introduced me to, even if I loved it. Then, as I begin to get over it, I get to where I can listen to, say, The Moody Blues, without having the disastrous breakup come into my brain by association. And, I know (or decide) I'm really over it when I can listen without CARING if I think of the (expletive not repeated) or not. I don't ever get (or haven't yet gotten) to the point where I don't associate the music with the person who first had me listening to it. But as long as that association no longer "ruins" the music for me...

I have a similar theme with food and drink. One of my old flames liked layered Toasted Almonds, one of the best sweet alcoholic drinks ever imbibed (pour slowly over ice equal measures of Kahlua, Amaretto, and cream. Once it's served, use stirrer to fold, very slowly and carefully to avoid "bruising" the cream, till the color is unified. You end up with something like coffee almond ice cream in texture. If you let the bartender mix it, it's as thin as milk). After the breakup, I couldn't drink them for a while, but now can enjoy them, and be glad I was taught about them, and not have it "ruined" by memories of the (unmentionable) who did the teaching. But I doubt I'll ever order one without remembering how we met (the drink and I, I mean).

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 11 May 00 - 12:34 PM

Yeah, Mrr, I know what you mean. I had an ex that ruined Coke and Cognac for me. Still haven't gone back.

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: katlaughing
Date: 11 May 00 - 12:43 PM

From today's newspaper: It (heartbreak)is a curious sensation: the sort of pain that goes mercifully beyond our powers of feeling. When your heart is broken, your boats are burned: nothing matters any more. It is the end of happiness and the beginning of peace. Geroge Bernard Shaw

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: GUEST,Peter T.
Date: 11 May 00 - 12:46 PM

I wish I had known about Emmylou Harris much longer ago -- the woman has a voice like a knife through the heart (homeopathic medicine!). "Boulder to Birmingham", "You Don't Know Me" - Whew. You almost want to find someone to break up with just so you can put the records on.

yours, Peter T.

Subject: Lyr Add: EVIL WOMAN (from Electric Light Orchestra
From: Mbo
Date: 11 May 00 - 01:14 PM

You know it had to come sometime....ELO!!!

You made a fool of me
But them broken dreams have got to end.

Hey woman, you got the blues
Cos' you ain't got no one else to use,
There's an open road that leads nowhere
So just make some miles between here and there.
There's a hole in my head where the rain comes in,
You took my body and played to win,
Ha Ha! woman it's a cryin' shame,
But you ain't got nobody else to blame.

Evil Woman, Evil Woman
Evil Woman, Evil Woman

Rolled in from another town,
Hit some gold too hot to settle down,
But a fool and his money soon go separate ways,
And you found a fool lyin' in a daze,
Ha Ha! woman what you gonna do,
You destroyed all the virtues that the Lord gave you,
It's so good that you're feelin' pain
But you better get your face on board the very next train.

Evil woman how you done me wrong,
But now you're tryin' to wail a different song,
Ha Ha! funny how you broke me up,
You made the wine now you drink a cup,
I came rinnin' every time you cried,
Thought I saw love smilin' in your eyes,
Ha Ha! woman very nice to know,
That you ain't got no place left to go.

Evil Woman, Evil Woman
Evil Woman, Evil Woman

--Mbo

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Jim the Bart
Date: 11 May 00 - 01:17 PM

If you're teetering on the brink, try "Don't Think About Her When You're Trying to Drive" from Little Village. It'll take you all the way over the edge.
After a "better for both of us" breakup I still like "Love the One Your With" just to get the juices flowing.
And when it's "good riddance" time, give me "Like a Rolling Stone", loud, heavy on the "How does it feel?".

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: GUEST,Steve Latimer
Date: 11 May 00 - 01:25 PM

My Walkin' Shoes Don't Fit Me Anymore.

Idiot Wind. "I can't even touch the books you've read"

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Mbo
Date: 11 May 00 - 01:41 PM

There's always "Death on 2 Legs" by Queen, but I think that's a little too vengeful, even for the most angry of the heartbroken!

--Mbo

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: DougR
Date: 11 May 00 - 02:09 PM

Tex Ritter's "When You Leave, Don't Slam The Door."

DougR

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: jeffp
Date: 11 May 00 - 02:14 PM

My musical partner of long standing has written a song dedicated to his ex-wife, which would be perfect. I'll ask him for permission to post the lyrics.

jeffp

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: TerriM
Date: 11 May 00 - 02:23 PM

How about Paul Simon's '50 Ways to Leave Your Lover'?

I always play all 'our'songs until I'm all sobbed out as a cartharsis, holed up with Hagen Daaz and those special girl friends who can always find you more reasons to hate him without questioning your judgement as to why you ended up with him in the first place.

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: JenEllen
Date: 11 May 00 - 02:42 PM

Good Gawd! I knew I'd come to the right place! (Another GREAT one is the Geezinslaws "I Kissed the Bus")
When I took her to the station
I didn't kiss her 'bye
But I kissed the bus for hauling her away...

Lessee...
kat: the preferred expression here is 'don't let the door hit'cha where the good lord split'cha...*bg*
Spaw: that was BEAUTIFUL!
Amos: don't be sad! It's TONS better to get out before you wind up in divorce court....
Mark: thanks for the inspiration, I'm still at the spot where songs make a knife to the heart...nice to know time will fix it
Leej: WHAT ABOUT MY BIG BUT????? (thanks for the belly laugh!)
Amergin: Good sound advice, but I canna handle the antidepressants. How are you supposed to know what feels good if you've never felt bad??
Mbo: knew that rock music had to be good for something.....:)

Great songs guys, and twist your friend's arm jeffp, I'd love to hear his song as well.

Basically the healing is about over. I think it starts when you first think 'what am I doing here anyways?' Then you have to do like Amergin says....just keep on keeping on, and eventually the little 'ACK' moments go away. Luckily for me, everyone's been there....Thanks guys.
~Elle

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Kim C
Date: 11 May 00 - 04:41 PM

Well, Mister and I will celebrate our 10th anniversary this year. BUT I still remember when I was a very pained soul, about 20 years old, and I listened the hell out of Rosanne Cash's King's Record Shop album, and Dire Straits Love Over Gold, especially Romeo's Song. Haven't listened to those in about, well, about 10 years. :)

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Peter T.
Date: 11 May 00 - 05:05 PM

What hasn't happened here is the parsing of this into different songs for different sequences. Where is Elizabeth Kubler-Ross? That is:
a) Songs for the first half hour (Ding, Dong the Witch is Dead through to Gotterdammerung);

b) Songs to sit and mope to, hour after hour, day after day.

c) Songs to get you through the night (these are different than mope songs).

d) Songs to bring back/eviscerate/cover over/eradicate memories.

e) Songs to begin to move back to human being status.

The best example of (e) that I know is George Jones' "He Stopped Loving Her Today". The song is so ridiculously, completely over the top, that you have to laugh. Which is a start towards (e).

yours, Peter T.

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: JenEllen
Date: 11 May 00 - 06:53 PM

Who the hell needs Lizzy when you've got a PeterT? :) That was beautifully put...

A)The 'I've had someone else' song
B) Mary Chapin-Carpenter's 'Just Because' (still makes me feel as if to vomit)
C) Anything by Dave Carter/Tracy Grammar or Steve and Shelly Hines
D) Leaving London, which USED to be one of my favorite songs, but seems more than a little tainted now
E) Sitting on the porch with a few friends and bottles of Washington wine, belting out 'You Picked a Fine Time to Leave Me Lucille' until you laugh yourself ill, or the neighbors call the fuzz, whatever comes first...:)

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Micca
Date: 11 May 00 - 07:37 PM

There is , always, Sandy Denny, " Who knows where the time goes" and even better "Solo" from the "Like an Old Fashioned Waltz" album.
"...Theres a time to be talking and a time when its no use
sometimes I think the things you say are liable to confuse
I have just gone...Solo
do you play... Solo
aint life a .. Solo

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: paddyc
Date: 11 May 00 - 09:37 PM

That's what you get for lovin' me........

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Jim Krause
Date: 12 May 00 - 04:42 PM

A buddy of mine, and partner in musical crime wrote a song called "You Broke My Heart, You Pig." Too bad he never recorded it.

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Mark Cohen
Date: 12 May 00 - 11:48 PM

Oh, yes...

You done stomped on my heart
And you mashed that sucker flat
You just sorta
Stomped on my aorta
You started going out with guys
I felt us drift apart
And every step you took
Was a stomp upon my heart

That was a big hit among us (single) medical students back in the good old days. I know John Denver recorded it, but who wrote it?

Aloha,
Mark

Subject: RE: What do you say/play when it's over?
From: Amergin
Date: 13 May 00 - 12:38 AM

Jen, unfortunately I pretty much have to take antidepressants. You see I am the proud inheritor of a gene that causes a chemical imbalance, causing abnormally low levels of serotonin. Antidepressants just boost production of the serotonins to normal levels. So we can feel the pain the way every one else does, not feeling like your sinking in a bottomless lake, with no hope of swimming to the surface. Keep your chin up.

BTW glad you liked my advice.

Amergin