BS: BS Gas not CS gas

Subject: BS Gas not CS gas
From: GUEST,Roger the skiffler
Date: 06 Jun 01 - 11:45 AM

I copy this story from BBC online without comment, knowing it will appeal to some of you (YOU KNOW WHO!).
Police inquiry over breaking wind claim

Eight detectives are to be questioned after complaints that one of them broke wind in front of a family during a raid. The Metropolitan Police said the complainant described the incident as rude and unprofessional.

The male officers, who were carrying out a drugs search at an Essex home, will be interviewed by Scotland Yard's internal disciplinary body.

The officers will also be questioned in relation to a complaint of assault.

RtS ("Drop the gun, sonny, or the sargeant here will turn round and let one rip!")

Subject: RE: BS: BS Gas not CS gas
From: GUEST,Amos
Date: 06 Jun 01 - 11:53 AM

Internal disciplinary body? Sounds like that was what was missing all along!

Subject: RE: BS: BS Gas not CS gas
From: Gary T
Date: 06 Jun 01 - 02:10 PM

During a RAID? Seems to me if I were in the middle of (especially the target of) a police raid, I would not be focused on counting farts. But even more amazing, the Yard is going to investigate the incident. I can just see some poor schmuck explaining to friends and family that he's on Flatulence Detail.

So it was unprofessional, huh? What does a professional one sound and smell like?

Subject: RE: BS: BS Gas not CS gas
From: Pseudolus
Date: 06 Jun 01 - 02:56 PM

This thread stinks! *BG*

However I know I would have been sued too even if I WASN'T the one who let loose. I would have been sued for laughing my ass off!!!!

"....Well Sergeant, we can let it go that you damaged the door upon breaking into the residence, we can look the other way dealing with the fact that the door fell on one of the residents. We can even forget about the stiches to the owner's head, but when Jonsie here cut the cheese, did you have to fall down on the floor laughing?!?!? And did you have to wipe your tears on the good curtains?!?!?! huh?!?!?!

Frank

Subject: RE: BS: BS Gas not CS gas
From: kendall
Date: 06 Jun 01 - 08:46 PM

Spaw will love this! By the way, I also consider it rude!

Subject: RE: BS: BS Gas not CS gas
From: gnu
Date: 06 Jun 01 - 09:48 PM

Rude and unprofessional ? I would call it being caught short. Let he who is without wind....

Subject: RE: BS: BS Gas not CS gas
From: Bert
Date: 06 Jun 01 - 11:45 PM

A policemans fart should smell like a doughnut.

BTW, this sounds like a song challenge to me.

Subject: RE: BS: BS Gas not CS gas
From: paddymac
Date: 07 Jun 01 - 01:10 AM

The details not reported in the story make all the difference. IMHO, if it was a natural act with out fanfare, well, such things happen and are normally overlooked in polite society. If, however, it was "presented" with great fanfare, with some sort of an "in your face" attitude, then it is an entirely different matter which certainly does warrant discipline.

Subject: RE: BS: BS Gas not CS gas
From: Crazy Eddie
Date: 07 Jun 01 - 01:12 AM

I think all the cops should deny it "It wasn't me"
Then, call in the forensic lab! Expert Witness
"Well, Me Prosecutor, having examined PC Smiths underwear, I can definately say that he broke wind between, 10.00am, and 11.00am"
Defense Lawyer (cross-examining)
"But can you say with certainty, that this fart was the one in question?"
There's definitely a script for a sketch here somewhere. Come back Monty Python, all is forgiven!

Subject: RE: BS: BS Gas not CS gas
From: MudGuard
Date: 07 Jun 01 - 02:16 AM

Song challenge?
Here come the lyrics, someone else has to come up with a tune!

A policeman, while being on a raid
Did something that was not very kind.
'Twas something for which he isn't paid,
He let go of a stinky sort of wind!

It was not one fart, it was a pair.
Now he is off duty, that's a fact,
But this can be considered fair
For he did break the Geneva act

His victims are still slightly dazed,
Of nothing else they are able to think
By bad dreams they'll forever be chased
Of the day when they were attacked by stink

MudGuard (should I rename myself to MudFart?)

Subject: RE: BS: BS Gas not CS gas
From: Steve Parkes
Date: 07 Jun 01 - 04:05 AM

No wonder they had to disband the Serious Crimes Squad! I have to say, it's an improvement on shooting little boys and pregnant women.

Steve

Subject: RE: BS: BS Gas not CS gas
From: Les from Hull
Date: 07 Jun 01 - 05:31 AM

Open up! Open up in there! Fart Squad!

Subject: RE: BS: BS Gas not CS gas
From: GUEST,Roger the skiffler
Date: 07 Jun 01 - 05:59 AM

I hope 'Spaw sees this before he goes in for his de-coke.
BTW , all the best, Pat from the usual loonies!
RtS (So that's why fictional coppers are always saying:" I don't like the smell of this."!)