BS: Who woulda Thought?

Subject: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: Jerry Rasmussen
Date: 29 Apr 04 - 06:00 PM

When I was a teenager, I had a general idea of what my life would be like as it unfolded. I would be a mechanical engineer, get a job somewhere near home when I graduated, make a lot of money, get married and live happily ever after. I was wrong on all counts. And, if my "plans" for the future turned out to be wrong, my parent's plans for me turned out to be even more ridiculous.

When I was 30, I thought I had my life figured out. It wasn't anything like I planned, but I thought I knew where I was going. Wrong again.

By the time I reached my 50's, you'd think I had my life pretty clearly figured out. I'd gone through a destructive marriage, an ugly divorce, raised two sons and was making plans for retiring back to where I grew up. I was dead wrong again.

I think we all like to feel that we are in control of our lives, because it's too frightening to think we aren't. But, just when you think you got this darned thing called life figured out, you're made a fool of again. I've been surprised more times than I can count..
Sometimes the surprise has been devastating, sometimes joyful beyond my wildest dreams.

Six years ago, I met the woman I would marry. She was absolutely nothing like the woman I dreamed of in my wildest imagination. She was far better than that. I never thought I would be married to such a beautiful woman. When I told my friend Joe that I was going out with Ruth, the woman I would marry, he made a classic comment. He said, "She's a beautiful woman, and she's good looking, too." Sums it up.

Life has a funny way of turning our plans upside down. Jeanie, here in Mudcat, said something once that not only made me laugh, it stuck with me. "Want to know how to make God laugh?, tell Him your plans for the future."

So, how has your life turned out, measuring it against your plans when you were a teenager?

Jerry

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: Amos
Date: 29 Apr 04 - 07:34 PM

I didn't really believe in plans, back then, but whatever impression I had of the future has gone into a cocked hat three or four times over, Jer.

And I'm not even gonna pretend I planned that!!

A

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: freda underhill
Date: 29 Apr 04 - 08:15 PM

my life went a long unexpected journey. when i was a kid, i wanted to be an artist or writer when i grew up, my mother wanted me to work with children. I had a very happy home & childhood.

I had two quick marriages. the first to an Irish hippie - I walked out with a nine month old baby girl. The second to a very controlling man, abusive. two more children, and i experienced a form of grand mal epilepsy - temporal lobe epilepsy, while i was pregnant with the second. I refused to take any medication for this, as I was pregnant, they said it would be okay, years later it was shown it would have damaged the baby. He walked out when she was three months old, and went to live in another country with a friend of mine, leaving me and the kids without any support.

The epilepsy had damaged my memory severely, luckily I had some lovely friends who helped me get by, but I was mentally limited and challenged for around three years after that. I was told by one doctor that if I was not careful I could spend the rest of my life in an asylum.

yes, the brain is an amazing thing and I healed, but will tell the sceptics the truth, I was healed, in a miraculous way. anyone who wants to know, I will pm the details.

I then went on to rebuild my life, fought off a challenge for the kids from my ex, when he came back to the country, got work as a cartoonist and illustrator for a few years, and then ended up working initially voluntarily with prisoners and the homeless. I got into a new relationship with a talented blues musician, he helped me bring up the kids and is a kind and wonderful person. Our relationship progressed to supportive friendship after 14 years, he lives next door and we have joint custody of the cat. I did paid work as a social welfare worker in the area of housing. I did some legal work for the housing organisation i worked for, this gave me the skills to talk my way into a job working interviewing and assessing asylum seeker applications for ten years, under the UN Convention for Refugees.

I was told that my superiors in Canberra had the highest opinion of my decisions and my intellect. I put this in, not because I'm boasting, but to give hope to anyone who has had their mind or memory damaged by illness - don't give up, you can heal, and contribute something. I have not told anyone at work about my previous illness and memory problems, people use these things against you in a very competitive environment. And nobody has noticed, however, I always take a lot of notes in any job I have, just in case.

I now work writing briefs on a number of sensitive matters including the Jewish community and the Middle East for a government minister. I am valued in this workplace as well.

Seven years ago I left blues for the music I loved in my teens - folk, and have never looked back.

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: Jerry Rasmussen
Date: 29 Apr 04 - 10:18 PM

A wonderful, understandable story, freda. There can be a value in going through destructive experiences, in that you can then empathize and support others who are going through them. At one point in my first marriage, I committed myself to a psychiatric ward, because I could no longer cope with my life. I probable learned more in those 17 days than I did in all the rest of my life leading up to that point, and like you I offer encouragement and hope to people who can't believe in it, themselves.

Not only can the mind and body heal miraculously, so can the heart.

Jerry

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: GUEST,freda
Date: 29 Apr 04 - 10:30 PM

thanks jerry. you are a sweetheart. my road has turned into a good one now, and i'm relieved and feel lucky. and have been free of health problems for 20 years. but i know things could have been very different.. yes, it has made me identify with people who have it hard.

one of my favourite songs is "Farther Along" - often I wonder why I must journey, over a road so rugged and bleak, then do I wonder why others prosper while with the lost i labour and weep..

farther along we'll know all about it..farther along we'll understand why, cheer up my brother, live in the sunshine, we'll understand it all by and by..

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 29 Apr 04 - 10:35 PM

I learned at a young age that plans don't work out.
A friend and myself did some years of hitchhiking around the country back in the late 70's, early 80's.
We pretty much threw a dart to decide where we were going to go. It was the PLAN. We were headed for Freedom, CA.
We were picked up by a trucker and he said to us, "There's nothing in Freedom for you girls. You should go to Santa Cruz."
That's only the beginning of the story. That was the end of making PLANS.

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: catspaw49
Date: 29 Apr 04 - 10:49 PM

Well like they say, if you fail to plan, you plan to fail. My life has been filled with failures as the result of well made plans turning to complete crappola! On the other hand, it has been equally filled with glorious accidents.

I have the greatest friend and partner in Karen I could ever imagine, two wonderful kids, and a good prescription drug plan, so what else is needed? .................................Actually, I could use a few more bucks.............

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: Allan C.
Date: 29 Apr 04 - 11:02 PM

Like many kids, I wanted to be a garbage man when I grew up. I was torn between that and wanting to take Gabby Hayes' place as Roy Rogers' sidekick. I knew all of Roy's songs - especially the ones he did with the Sons of the Pioneers. In my pre-teens I revised that wish. I wanted to be a writer; but recognized that I might need a real job and decided that a veterinarian might be a useful trade. Almost simultaneously, I wished to become a pop singer. The Kingston Trio changed all of that. Although I still paid close attention to the pop charts, the songs I usually played on the guitar, (my first) that I received for my 13th birthday, were those I learned from my KT3 albums. At one time I had all of those that are now referred to as being a part of "the Capital years". (The albums, themselves, have gone the way of roommates and divorces; but just yesterday I ordered the CD collection from Dick Greenhaus.) It was soon evident that music was a driving force in my life. I entered and won a bunch of talent contests, singing folk songs, mostly. I also sang in choirs throughout high school. The choir director I had during my senior year was so dynamic and inspiring that I decided I wanted to follow his career path. After a semester of music theory, I realized that doing music was much more fun than studying it. That realization was among the reasons I canceled my plans to attend a music conservatory after I graduated.

During these years my folks seemed happiest when I was pursuing my interest in biology. Mom and Dad both created a butterfly net for me out of stuff around the house. They allowed me to keep a young squirrel I caught. (I learned a lot from that squirrel!) They bought me a dandy microscope for Christmas during my junior year of high school. I later found out that Mom was convinced I would become a physician. When I announced my short-lived intention of becoming a high school choral director, Mom said, quite contemptuously, "A fat lot of money you'll make doing that!" I think that was the day I realized that my parents weren't perfect. If Dad ever had any thoughts about what he wanted me to be, he kept them to himself.

My high school yearbook predictions included a note mentioning that I would someday be performing in Greenwich Village. (Hm-m-m...I'll be attending my fortieth class reunion this summer. Wonder if I can find my way to Bleecker Street before then.)

The war was steadily expanding in Vietnam as I neared the end of high school. I was to turn 18 just a few months after graduation. I attempted to explore ways of side-stepping The Draft; but those wheels were moving much too slowly and The Draft wasn't. So, in order to keep from being drafted, I joined the Air Force. I flew a typewriter during my stay with them. After I got out I went through a long list of jobs. (See Brief Mudcat Biographies for a lengthy, but only partial listing.)

I recall that when I attended my twentieth high school class reunion I joked that I was still in high school -- working as a custodian. Try that sometime if you want to stop a conversation dead in its tracks!

If a career is defined by the jobs one has held the longest, then I had a career as a donut baker. I did that for something close to four years. Some time later, I became a nursing assistant. I did that for about seven years in a variety of settings. (The training came in handy some years later when I took care of my mother for two years.) I later spent twelve years managing copy centers at instructional facilities.

What ever happened to the writing? Virtually all of it goes into emails or postings here at the Mudcat. Once in a great while I find some subject that inspires me to expound. But, again, it usually goes into an email and is lost to me the moment I push the Send button. I've written a small few songs, only two of which I have ever performed.

What about the bent toward biology? I have a keen interest in the natural world. I'm especially fond of wildflowers as well as edible and medicinal plants. I won't claim to be especially knowledgeable, but I do know a few things about a good many plants. I also am a student of animal behavior and am an amateur tracker.

More recently, I've been working at hotels - often as what is called a Night Auditor, but also as a daytime Front Desk Clerk. (Capitalization makes them appear ever so much more important, don't you think?) After a long and tiresome job hunt here in Dallas I finally landed a position at a local Holiday Inn Express. Three weeks later the hotel was sold and I was out of a job.

So, now I am about to spend a year or so wandering about the country, singing and listening to as much folk music as I can. Maybe this is what I was meant to do from the start. I do plan to keep a journal. (Details about that will be forthcoming.) Perhaps this was the writing I was destined to be doing.

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: Gypsy
Date: 29 Apr 04 - 11:04 PM

I have always been present centered.........don't really look too much farther than today...either because i am having so much joy, that i don't want to stop, or am so miserable, that the thought of another day is too much.

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: Bobert
Date: 29 Apr 04 - 11:15 PM

Well, when I was 17 Iwas playing Babe Ruth baseball and hittin' over .500 and this was not long after the haydays of the Yankees so I figured that I would be a professional baseball player playing with the Washington Senators... Problem was, I was gettin' kicked out of school fir' skippin' and ended up in military school just to get a high school diploma...

Then the Lord got me into college in Richmond, Va. and it weren't oo much of jump from 3rd base to aiti-war demonsttations....

In 1996, my wife, Judy, died from cancer and I felt so empty. Then the Lord hooked me up with the P-Vine and she is to mw what beautiful and classy Ruthie is to Jerry... And everyday, I'm like bewildered in how God continues to bless us in taking adversity and turning it into something beautiful.

Bobert

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: LadyJean
Date: 30 Apr 04 - 01:13 AM

When I was in high school I expected to become a teacher. I didn't want to be. But it had been sort of decided that since I was good with children I should teach.
My senior project in high school was helping in a special education class.
I worked with one gifted teacher. The rest were bullies or incompetents. I decided, with all due respect to any educators who may read this, that teaching was not a job for anyone who likes children.
I'm a cleaning lady. Teaching would pay better, and there would be benefits. But I do not work with bullies or incompetents.

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: CarolC
Date: 30 Apr 04 - 01:58 AM

When I was a child, I heard this quite a lot, "You're going to grow up to be a street sweeper".

This is because I had a couple of learning disabilities before the days when they knew about things like learning disabilities. I had always tested above average on the aptitude tests, but I was getting terrible grades. So the adults thought I was a lazy underachiever, and the other kids just thought I was dumb. And I guess I believed them.

When I was 15, I became chronically ill, an illness from which I have never completely recovered. But it was an invisible illness, and nobody, including me, knew I had it, or just what, exactly was wrong with me. I just know that I remember a time when I felt healthy, and had energy, and that after a bad flu when I was 15, I never felt well again.

So, I have never really tried to make any long-term plans. I got ideas about things I wanted to try, and then I would try them. I've done almost everything I ever got an idea to do, including being a wildlife rehabilitation worker, a veterinary assistant, a zookeeper, an interpretive naturalist, a mother, a professional weaver, a back to the land, self-sufficient, living out in the middle of nowhere, hippy lady, and quite a few other things.

I can't really say I was necessarily successful at any of the things I've done (except being an interpretive naturalist... I think I was good at that, but it paid minimum wage, and I needed a living wage), otherwise I would probably have continued to do them. But because I kept hoping I would find something I would be successful at doing, I kept trying new things. And I think that is the real success of my life. I've had a very interesting, although much of the time, a very gruelling life.

Back when I first joined the Mudcat, I was working towards getting a bachelor's degree and then I hoped to get a masters degree in counseling. For a long time, I have felt that I could do a good job in that field. But problems with my vision and short term memory have probably made that an impossibility. But I guess that's ok, because I've still got a couple of things I want to accomplish, and I think they are within my capabilities.

And what a pleasant suprise it has been to discover a whole new life through just being here in the Mudcat, this being where I met my husband, and all of the good things that have come to me as a result of that.

Anyway, although I've been a lot of different things, and I've done a lot of different things in my life, one thing I've never been is a street sweeper.

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: Jerry Rasmussen
Date: 30 Apr 04 - 09:30 AM

What a delightfully unpredictable life many of us have lived. Maybe "plans" isn't the right word. I have lived life by the seat of my pants, mostly. Over the years, I've become comfortable, not knowing what the future holds for me. I realize that it isn't necessary to know where you're going. I'm a firm believer that life is as much preparation as fulfillment. I can see how seemingly meaningless experiences in the past have shaped and prepared me to do things in the present that I never could have forseen.

I also can see in this thread how early dreams and desires end up being fulfilled. When I was nine or ten years old, I really wanted to be a cartoonist and work for Walt Disney. For the last few years, I've created a string band of animal cartoon figures and used them on Christmas cards and as a logo. My desire to do art has also been helpful in doing layouts and drawings, and my high school days of mechanical drawing have been a big help in laying out construction projects around the house.

Nothing goes to waste.

Jerry

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: Allan C.
Date: 30 Apr 04 - 09:58 AM

Frankly, I was both puzzled and amazed by fellow classmates in high school who seemed to know precisely what career path they wanted. My friend, John, was totally certain, at the ripe age of 16, he wanted to be an electrical engineer. Stranger still, he actually became one. Carmen decided at the same age that she wanted to get into biological research. She did. I know of many other examples. Still, I can't for the life of me understand how these people could be so certain of their career paths so early on. (By the way, it didn't seem to be a matter of following in their parents' footsteps. These fields were very different from the ones their parents chose.)

I can remember my thoughts at the time. I was only sure of one thing: I couldn't picture myself walking through the same door to the same workplace for twenty years.

Did the way my life turned out surprise anyone? Perhaps. I think I've probably surpassed many people's estimation of my degree of underachievement (albeit, an inaccurate term by my standards.)

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: Scabby Douglas
Date: 30 Apr 04 - 10:56 AM

Ah, this rings a bell.

Like a few other people here, I had no clear vision of what my future would be, or where I would be. But it's turned out much better than I thought it would. That's not saying that anyone else would envy me my life, or approve of my choices, after all they're mine. I wouldn't live your life for all the tea in China (or anywhere else that has a large quantity of tea).

What I do know is that just as you turn your back on it, just when you think you have it all figured out, Fate or Life or Kismet will sneak up behind you with the baseball bat, and crack you a good one in the back of the skull. in the last 6 months I have seen this happen to two families I know - families who were "just like us" - ordinary people, trying to make end meet and do their best. Without going into details, both of these families who were "just like us" have suffered grief, loss and profound pain in a way that could not have been anticipated. And if it can happen to them, it can happen to us.

However, you can't live your life looking over your shoulder. That way, you either can't move forward, or you trip over things.

I have two-thirds of a song written, and it's driving me crazy, but it seems sort of appropriate.

Did they say, when you were younger, that you'd understand one day?
That you'd come to see the reasons why things have to be this way?
And as the years rolled over, were the hidden secrets shown?
Or were you left with just the ashes of the little you had known?
Even though you're not much wiser than you were away back then,
Would you want to be that certain of anything again?
But the road is still before you, and your feet are in your shoes
If the prize is not worth winning, then you've even less to lose.


Cheers


Steven

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: Allan C.
Date: 30 Apr 04 - 11:02 AM

"Fate works through time to produce irony in men's lives." - Thomas Hardy

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: Chief Chaos
Date: 30 Apr 04 - 11:19 AM

As a military brat I learned never to make any long term plans as we never knew when the next cruise would come up, when we'd have to move etc. I looked at life as a journey and have been across country more than a few times and met all sorts of interesting folks (including a chef for Pres. Jimmy Carter).
I went to college with the intent of becoming a marine biologist (Jacque Cousteau was my first idol) but became dissillusioned with the money machine that the colleges have become. Met my wonderful wife of 15 years and decided I needed a career. The Coast Guard offered a job in environmental protection (close enough to my original intentions) and I joined. It's been a roller-coaster ride at times (and the fun continues) but I have two great kids, a wonderful wife and two mischevious little corgis to see me through. I'm looking at retirement at twenty and have been thinking about teaching.

Im not the new Cousteau, or the new John Denver, thought I might be a paleontologist (but what young boy doesn't). But I'm satisfied!

"Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans"
---John Lennon

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: Mudlark
Date: 30 Apr 04 - 01:22 PM

Great stories, everyone, and Freda...just from your posts on MC I'd say you have a very superior and creative brain!

I started out wanting to be a painter, but 2 years of night classes at UCLA proved I was up against a bad case of no talent. OK, barring that I wanted to own a coffee house where I could preside over interesting BS conversation and play my guitar and sing Olde English ballads. Well, I sang in a lot of coffee houses, but never owned one. Went to Europe when I was 19 and vowed to go back for longer. Was just getting ready to embark on a 6-month stay in Spain when I met John...and we were married 3 months later. I just assumed I'd have children, but that didn't work out either. And my fill-in job as a tech typist, slowly turned into being a tech editor, then tech writer, and I--who had never held a job for longer than a year or so--ended up running the art department of a computer research firm for 7 years.

Then life took another turn. John, at 38, had a very bad heart attack, and nearly 2 years later we were the owners of a 160 acre Ozark hill farm. I could no more have imagined myself in this place at 23, than I could imagine becoming a deep sea diver. We lived there for nearly 13 years, running cattle, raising all our food, doing all our own butchering...a real back to the land trip, and honing our skills at being studio potters.

Allergies finally drove us back to the West Coast. Getting re-established here was difficult, but we somehow managed to build back a great and enthusiastic client base for our pottery, readjusted to 5 acres, rather than 160, and made a wonderful life here. The only thing missing was music. Pottery was for us, anyway, a highly rewarding but high energy-low paying career, so there was little time for much else. And altho John and I shared many things--aesthetics, philosophy, a love of living in the country, our dogs--he had absolutely no interest in folk music; in fact, tho he tried to be nice about it he found it monumentally boring. So I found myself playing my guitar less and less.

3 years ago John died unexpectedly. And my life has taken another turn, altho sometimes it feels like I've come full circle. I was devastated for a long time after John's death, and to pull myself out of this pit I decided to start volunteering with Hospice to play in critical care facilities. From that time on music has steadily become an ever bigger part of my life. Through Mudcat, and lots of good luck, I've found many people to share music with, have regained at least some of the youthful confidence I once had for playing in front of an audience. Although the pottery died with John, I've taken up an old love, photography, and am having some small success with this. And my life is suddenly full of people, wonderful friends and acquaintances. John was a bit of a recluse, and over the years we had both become somewhat isolated. So I am celebrating the rebirth of many of the things that were important to me as a kid.

True, I never got the pony I prayed for, but I have had 40 truly remarkable years with an amazing man, and am both astonished and grateful to find another life now emerging. I've got a home I love in the country, 3 great corgis, friends, music and the ocean just 35 miles away. At 23 I never thought about being 66, never thought I would get that old! But if I had been able to imagine that, I think this is the life I could well have imagined for myself, as well.

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: GUEST,Whistle Stop
Date: 30 Apr 04 - 02:46 PM

Chief Chaos, I also ended up in the Coast Guard pursuing a career in environmental protection; specifically, four years at Captain of the Port New York (1978-82), and three at Marine Safety Office Boston (1985-88). In 1988 I turned down orders to a LEDET out of Portsmouth, VA to accept a job with the Massachusetts Department of Environmental Protection. Perhaps we ran into each other somewhere along the way?

And no, none of this was part of the plan.

Steve Roberson, BM2-type

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: Ebbie
Date: 30 Apr 04 - 06:34 PM

What interesting people you all are! This is like a large room filled with lovely people engaged in laidback conversation that gives us each a glow. I hope someday to meet a good many of you in the flesh- but if not, it's OK because I already know you.

I have ended up with a much more satisfying life than I actually earned. Just yesterday I told a friend that if I didn't have music - a LOT of music- in my life I don't really know what kind of life I'd have, or whether I would even be alive today.

After a difficult time of it in early life, my first outlet was writing, fiction first and then children's fiction and then non-fiction. It got me through a lot of years of pain. Eventually I added art to the mix. It was much later that music became so important to me. Now and for the last 20 years or so, music and its people is a constant source of peace and serenity and creativity and excitement and just plain pleasure.

There really was no plan until about 15 years ago, sad to say. And now I've given even that up, since I no longer need to know.

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: Chief Chaos
Date: 01 May 04 - 01:20 AM

Steve - Not likely, I joined in July '88 (Papa 187)(actually enlisted on July 4th, how patriotic! and stupid. Spent my first night in the Coast Guard sitting in a squad bay with my back against a wall so we wouldn't sky lark at the fireworks! Our current skipper down here is a Bostonian by the name of Steven Garrity. He still roots for the Sox, the Celtics, and the Pats. Bit of an eccentric to me, strange that he's in the guard but no stranger than me I guess (I'm an MSTC if you hadn't figured that out already).

Mudlark - Another person owned by Corgis - and you know that's true! Sorcha also owns a few. I wonder how many of us there are in Mudcat?

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: GUEST,Fred Miller
Date: 01 May 04 - 02:07 AM

I planned to never marry and to be dead by now. I grated and sifted asbestos in my room to make a plaster diorama for a 3rd grade student fair. I used the chemically polluted water from a hometown cave in my bong. I think I'm probably in the express checkout lane. But I'm happily married.

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: GUEST,Whistle Stop
Date: 03 May 04 - 08:25 AM

Sorry for the thread drift, folks.

Chief Chaos, I guess we just missed each other, as I got out in July '88. However, I did know Steve Garrity, in both New York and Boston, and he might remember me; please mention me to him if you get the chance. And you know, we're all a little eccentric, when you come right down to it. All the best,

Steve (Romeo 98)

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: dianavan
Date: 03 May 04 - 05:41 PM

Oh dear - many many changes!

My mom said, "Whatever makes you happy." Dad said, "Airline stewardess or dietician." The career options test said, taxidermy. I thought I'd get married and have kids.

I've been a retail sales clerk, model, medical claims clerk, deckhand, fisheries officer, coffee shop manager, telemarketer and teacher. Those are just the things that made some money to put the food on the table because I did manage to become a mother as well. I've also travelled a fair bit.

I always thought that owning land was the "root of all evil" but two years ago, realized that unless I wanted to become a bag lady, I'd better "get with it". I now own a house and a washer and dryer. I guess you'd say I've come a long way from being the wandering, free spirit of my younger days. I make plans. I have goals. I even have a credit card.

I was never good at life-long committments, therefore not very good wife material. My children call me a serial monogamist. I managed to be a decent mother. I defied the odds against single parents and produced a couple of decent, intelligent, emotionally stable, human beings. I also managed to remain friends with the fathers of my children.

I somehow thought that my life would settle down once I reached forty but have learned only to expect the unexpected.

I often wonder what my mother meant when she said she wanted me to be happy. For me, happiness is but a momentary glimpse of something very beautiful. Content? Yes! My friends are life long friends and I have many. I count my blessings every day.

Subject: RE: BS: Who woulda Thought?
From: Jerry Rasmussen
Date: 03 May 04 - 07:06 PM

Hey, Dianavan:

Happiness? I have my own thoughts on that topic. Our constituion givs us the right to the "pursuit of happiness." That's well put. If happiness was so easy to find, you wouldn't have to spend your life pursuing it. It is very elusive, and often turns out to be short-lived if you ever catch it. "Content" is good. It's probably more realistic than "happiness" and more lasting. It has fewer ups and downs. "Appreciative" is another wonderful state to be in.

And when you can find it, I'll take "joyful" any day.

"Adventurous" needs to be part of the formula, too. It sounds like most of the people who've contributed to this thread know all about "adventurous."

Jerry