Lyr Req/Add: Football Crazy

Subject: Football Crazy
From:
Date: 03 Jan 99 - 07:55 PM

I am trying to find the lyrics to a British or Australian song I heard about 10-12 years ago. I can remember only two lines of the chorus:

'He's football crazy; he's football [bloody] mad; Football has taken away The little bit of sense he had.."

All help gratefully accepted.

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Art Thieme
Date: 03 Jan 99 - 10:38 PM

"Football Crazy" iis on an old Riverside LP called __CHAMPIONS AND SPORTING BLADES___ done by various British singers including Ewan MacColl--"The Card Song"-"Morrissey And The Russian Sailor", A.L. Lloyd, Patrick Galvan (who I think sang "F.C."), Alf Edwards on concertina on many tracks/cuts---and many others. A GREAT album. Don't know if it's on CD, but I doubt it. Once again, all my records are incommunicado for a while. If I can ever find it, I'll post it. I gave the LP to Dan Keding years ago--when I put it on cassette----but Dan is packed up & ready to move too.

Best of luck,

Art

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From:
Date: 04 Jan 99 - 07:56 AM

Thanks so much for the quick reply. Fortunately, I still have my old stereo turntable. Please do post the info, when or if you find it.

Esther

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: alison
Date: 04 Jan 99 - 11:56 PM

Hi,

From memory,

He's football crazy, he's football mad
That football team has robbed him of the little bit of sense he had
And it would take a ?????????? to??????????
since our ??? became a member of that terrible football club

I think it made it into the British charts possibly in the 70's around the same time as Chelsea football club had a hit with "Blue is the colour." (Nearly every Christmas some of the soccer clubs would release a single........ terrible it was too........ didn't get to see nearly as much of the Bay City Rollers!!)

Slainte

alison

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: AndyG
Date: 05 Jan 99 - 06:13 AM

He's footba' crazy, he's footba' mad
That footba' it has robbed him o' the wee bit of sense he had
And it would tak a dozen skivvies his claes (clothes) tae wash an' scrub
Since oor Jock became a member o' that terrible footba' club.

Robin Hall & Jimmy McGregor - a long tim ago..

AndyG

Apologies to any Scots language specialists.

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Fergus
Date: 05 Jan 99 - 06:17 AM

fwiw, the version of the chorus I learnt in school went:

He's football crazy, he's football mad The football it has taken away the little bit of sense he had And it would take a dozen servants To wash his clothes and scrub Since Paul became a member of that terrible football club.

It had verses, too, but they don't come to mind.

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: AndyG
Date: 05 Jan 99 - 06:37 AM

For alison,

BEE AY WHY !
BEE AY WHY !
BEE AY WHY SEA EYE TEA WHY !
With an ARE OH DOUBLE-ELL EE ARE ESS,
Bay City Rollers are the best !

AndyG

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: alison
Date: 05 Jan 99 - 08:08 AM

YEAH Andy,

Thanks, I was young and very annoyed because my mum wouldn't let me go to there concert or wear tartan drainpipes.... but I did have the stripey socks....

All together now....

And we Sang Shang-a-lang as we ran with the gang

Doing doo-wap-be doo-be-do way------

Slainte

alison

Subject: Lyr Add: FOOTBALL CRAZY (from Steve Benbow)
From: Bert
Date: 05 Jan 99 - 08:53 AM

I seem to recall Steve Benbow doing an Irish version of this long before Robin Hall & Jimmy McGregor.

All I can recall is...


I have a favourite brother, and his name is Paul
He's lately joined a football club, 'cos he's mad about football.
.........(something, something, something,)............
They'd two half bricks for goal posts and a tin can for the ball

Chorus: He's football crazy, He's football mad.
Football it has taken away the little bit of sense he had
Oh, It would take a dozen servants to wash his clothes and scrub
since Paul became a member of that terrible football club.

It was in the middle of the field at Masterton, the captain says to Paul
'Would you kindly take me place, 'cos your mad about football.'
He took a few steps backward and shot off from the mark,
The ball went sailing over the bar and landed in New York.

Chorus:
His wife she says she'll leave him, if Paul he doesn't keep,
away from football kicking at night time in his sleep.
He calls her Pat McGinty, and other names so droll.
Last night he kicked her out of the bed and swore it was a goal.

Chorus:

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Uncle Fred
Date: 05 Jan 99 - 09:20 AM

I have an old Riverside recording of Football Crazy. I'll give you the chorus off the top of my head... I'll dig it out and give you the rest later. "He's football crazy' Completly off his head His right shin bone is fractured And he's lookin' very bad His jaws are droppin inwards now (can't remember the next line) Since Greasey took a notion for To join a football club.

There's something in there about, "The judges bein' gentlemen went off to have their tea" and "He slaughtered every Kerry man who threatened not to yield" and "Once again poor Greasey was flung headlong in the ditch."

More later.

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Art Thieme
Date: 05 Jan 99 - 09:38 AM

Fred & all,

That must be the same Riverside LP I gave to Dan. Still can't find the tape o' it, but I do recall it was Ewan MacColl singing it on there. Soooo, the race to post that one is out o' the gate & runnin'...

Art

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Steve Parkes
Date: 05 Jan 99 - 11:22 AM

I remember Steve Benbow's version as well! Whatever happened to him?

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: AndyG
Date: 05 Jan 99 - 12:33 PM

Odd what one recalls, I remember Steve Benbow for his rendition of The Terrible Man-Eating Shark. Not that I remember the words of course, that would be asking too much.
And it might have been Steve Benbow I heard performing the temperance parody The Poor Young Man, to which I can remember the words but not, of course, who sang it.

Ho-hum

AndyG

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Gene
Date: 05 Jan 99 - 12:51 PM

Here's a few more football songs:

FOUR SCORES AND SEVEN BEERS AGO:
* COWPIE *
ANOTHER FOOTBALL YEAR:
* COWPIE *
And there's also Dick Feller's:
-FOOTBALL CARD-
And the classic Andy Griffith narration:
-WHAT IT WAS, WAS FOOTBALL-

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Bert
Date: 05 Jan 99 - 01:36 PM

The man eating shark is in DT. search for [chivalrous shark].

I also remember Steve Benbow singing Master McGrath. Haven't heard of him in years.

Bert.

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Pete M
Date: 05 Jan 99 - 03:08 PM

Nah Gene, we're talking Football here man, the greatest game in the world, not some wierd ritual wi' a bunch of overstuffed ninnies head buttin' each other!

I did hear of a Celtic supporter who, when his wife complained that he thought more of Celtic than he did of her replied "Hen, I think mair o' Rangers than I do o' ye!"

Pete M

Subject: Lyr Add: FOOTBALL CRAZY
From: Uncle Fred
Date: 06 Jan 99 - 12:49 AM

Art and all, OK here goes.
It's Patrick Galvin. RLP 12-631 or S-2. (Riverside died in '63).

Have you ever heard of Breezy who came from Closter Green
He was the picture of a man whose life was never seen
Until he joined a football club above in Evergreen
To play agin the Kerrymen below in Aggardreen.

He stood there like an idjit in the center of the pitch
The Kerry center-forward came and kicked him in the ditch
His overcoat on top of him he lay there in his gore
And 1000's of spectators was screamin' out for more.

He's football crazy, completely off his head
His right shin bone is fractured and he's lookin' very bad

Subject: Lyr Add: FOOTBALL CRAZY
From: Uncle Fred
Date: 06 Jan 99 - 01:04 AM

His jaws are droppin inwards now his too slep in his gob (whatever that means)
Since Breezy took a notion for to join a football club.

27 casualties at 25 past 3,
The courtmen bein' gentlemen broke off to have their tea.
They carried poor old Breezy in a long white linen sack,
And they manicured his fingernails before they brought him back.

Breezy went demented he charged across the field.
He slaughtered ev'ry Kerry man who threatened no to yield.
He scored a dozen goals away before you'd blink an eye.
Mcvaney from the coalkey held his half until he died.

The crowd they couldn't stand it they all began to boo,
The like of it was never heard outside of Killaloo.
Spectators in the 1000's came a chargin' down the pitch,
And once again poor breezy was flung headlong in the ditch.

Subject: Lyr Add: FOOTBALL CRAZY
From: Uncle Fred
Date: 06 Jan 99 - 01:12 AM

So all you handsome courtmen, a warnin take from me.
Never join a football club, you're better off at sea.
The curse of ev'ry nation ask Breezy and you'll see
He's cursin' evry football club from Cork to Killagree.

Choruses between every two verses...

that's it as well as I can decipher from Irish. Oh yes, the album is Irish Humor Songs. Cheers.

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Uncle Fred
Date: 06 Jan 99 - 06:35 PM

O.k. here's the chorus again to Football Crazy since I had a flash of clarity on my way to work.

He's football crazy, completly off his head'
His right shin bone is fractured and he's lookin' very bad
His jaws are droppin' inwards now he's TOOTHLESS in his gob
Since Breezy took a notion for to join a football club.

If anyone can dig up the rest of that other F.C. I'd love to see it. It sounds very funny. Kinda from the laundry workers point of view.

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Chet W.
Date: 09 Jan 99 - 01:08 PM

If it's football songs you want, look up Ukelele Ike's rendition of "I may not be a football hero, but I'm a bear in a lady's boudoir...". It does have a somewhat adult theme though, be warned, with lines like "When I removed my interference, the goal line wasn't very far" and "Those boys get a letter for not playin' rough, I should get an alphabet for doin' my stuff".

Chet W.

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: rick fielding
Date: 09 Jan 99 - 01:35 PM

Absolutely true tale. Twenty or more years ago while playing for school kids I was taught this by a 10 or 11 year old. (she insisted on singing it to me away from the teacher and all but a couple of her classmates) "The game was played on Sunday in old st. Peters yard. Moses he played halfback and Jesus Christ played guard. The Angels filled the bleachers and oh, how they did yell. When Moses scored a touchdown to beat the boys from Hell. Goal they cried! Goal they cried! Moses on the ten yard line, Jesus, he played guard damn fine! Goal they cried! Goal they cried! Hoke em' poke em' bloody well choke em', goallll..they cried." Don't remember if she told me who she learned it from, but a couple of the terms sound British in origin. Anybody else heard it?

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Art Thieme
Date: 09 Jan 99 - 05:14 PM

Mr. Bert,

I learned "THE CHIVALROUS SHARK" from Burl Ives a long while back; A Decca record I'm pretty sure. Once, at Winfield, Kansas Festival (actually the WALNUT VALLEY FESTIVAL) I pulled it out & sang it. It was included on a benefit tape they and Cathy Fink produced for us when I was undergoing one surgery or another. (I don't remember which one.) The name of that cassette was __Art Thieme--LIVE AT WINFIELD__. It's now out of print, but that song was on there.

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Ritchie
Date: 10 Jan 99 - 08:23 AM

As Bill Shankley , the late manager of Liverpool F.C., used to say.. "Football is not a game of life or death..it's much more important than that."

I went to Liverpool the other week to watch Newcastle.. and although we lost I had the good fortune to meet some really lovely, warm, genuine people.

For our friends across the water... for 'football' read 'soccer'.

I have often wonderered if soccer or American football crowds chant at games, because here ,sometimes the humour and singing is better than the football.

love and happiness

Ritchie

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Pete M
Date: 10 Jan 99 - 03:04 PM

I always understood that Anfield was the biggest "folk club" in the world!

Pete M

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: The Shambles
Date: 13 Jul 99 - 04:05 PM

I had forgotten that the chap featured in the song was called Paul.

It could have been written for Gazza? Maybe he bases his life on the song?

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Den
Date: 13 Jul 99 - 09:59 PM

You know its one of those bloddy songs that go round and round in your head at night when your lying in bed trying desperately to convince yourself to go to sleep before the alarm clock goes off and you have to drag yourself into another work day. Football crazy, to be honest I can only remember the chorus. I'd love to have the rest of the lyrics though. I too am a self confessed Football (soccer to all our N. American friends) nut, come on you reds. The Bay city Rollers even got a mention...S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y. Anyone remember Jilted John...Alison?

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Ritchie
Date: 14 Jul 99 - 07:47 AM

Den, Lets guess...you support Man Utd...and you live in..? OK you win I give up.

Roll on August !!

Ricardo Forstericci.

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Den
Date: 14 Jul 99 - 01:42 PM

Your right Ritchie. I've been a United fan all my life. I grew up in N. Ireland but now live in Canada. Thank goodness for TSN, ESPN and Sportsnet. Roll on August is right.

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Penny S.
Date: 16 Jul 99 - 11:16 AM

I will look for my copy of this. I used to have a set of spirit duplicated words in the classroom, but they aren't here now, because I found out they are copyrighted, and ...

Penny

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: The Shambles
Date: 16 Jul 99 - 05:22 PM

Oh and congratulations to the USA. The World Champions

Football crazy?

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: Penny S.
Date: 16 Jul 99 - 06:47 PM

I haven't found my long set of words, but a copy of "Folk Song Today" 1969, published by EFDS, has a two verse version, arranged by Seamus Ennis, heard sung by Paddy Cronin in East Kerry in 1949.

Penny

Subject: RE: Football Crazy
From: rich r
Date: 16 Jul 99 - 06:52 PM

Aye, the women were fantastic, but that is soccer mind you, not "football" in the true Vince Lombardi tradition

rich r

Subject: Lyr Add: FOOTBALL CRAZY
From: Jason Xion Wang
Date: 05 Sep 10 - 12:04 AM

Football Crazy
(Traditional???)

Well, you all know my big brother and his Christian name is Paul
He's lately joined a football club for he's mad about football
He has two black eyes already and teeth out from his gob
Since Paul became a member of this terrible football club

For he's football crazy, he's football mad
And the football it has taken away the little bit of sense he had
And it would take a dozen servants to wash his clothes and scrub
Since Paul became a member of this terrible football club

At the first match that he played at, I was there myself and saw
Two turf sods for goalposts and a tin can for a ball
And the lord mayor he was there himself and all the ladies grand
Paul got an orange box and made a whole grand stand

For he's football crazy, he's football mad
And the football it has taken away the little bit of sense he had
And it would take a dozen servants to wash his clothes and scrub
Since Paul became a member of this terrible football club

In the middle of the field one afternoon, the captain said to Paul
Would you kindly take this place kick since you're mad about football
He took forty paces backwards and he shot off from the mark
And the ball went sailing o'er the bar and landed in New York

For he's football crazy, he's football mad
And the football it has taken away the little bit of sense he had
And it would take a dozen servants to wash his clothes and scrub
Since Paul became a member of this terrible football club

Oh, his wife says she'll leave him if Paul he doesn't keep
Away from football kicking every night time in his sleep
For he calls her (someone's name unknown)* and other things so droll
Last night he shot her out of bed and swore it was a goal

For he's football crazy, he's football mad
And the football it has taken away the little bit of sense he had
And it would take a dozen servants to wash his clothes and scrub
Since Paul became a member of this terrible football club

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Football Crazy
From: Joe Offer
Date: 05 Sep 10 - 02:20 AM

Where's you get your version from, DDPro?

-Joe-

Subject: RE: req/ADD: Football Crazy
From: Jason Xion Wang
Date: 05 Sep 10 - 02:38 AM

Joe,

Thanks for putting the two threads together.

This version comes from a 1973 BBC television show - quite late for this old song. It was sung live after a short comment on Chelsea FC, a English football (soccer) club. I think that it's a more complete version of this song, comparing with the 3-verse versions. I cannot figure out the name in the last verse - maybe it's the name of a then member of Chelsea FC.

Jason

Subject: RE: req/ADD: Football Crazy
From: GUEST,Suibhne Astray
Date: 05 Sep 10 - 03:24 AM

Refering to my antiquated Folktrax cassette of Seamus Ennis's superlative rendition it seems to be:

He shouted "There's a fifty!" and other things so droll...

Alas, I am no follower of football, so whether this makes any sense I couldn't say.

Subject: RE: req/ADD: Football Crazy
From: Dave MacKenzie
Date: 05 Sep 10 - 03:26 AM

Since metrication, a fifty has been a forty-five in Gaelic Football.

Subject: RE: req/ADD: Football Crazy
From: Steve Parkes
Date: 05 Sep 10 - 09:45 AM

He calls out, "Pass, McGinty!" and other things so droll

... something we were always told off for at school.

Subject: RE: req/ADD: Football Crazy
From: Dave MacKenzie
Date: 05 Sep 10 - 10:11 AM

Here's an earlier thread:

Who was he Football Crazy about?

Subject: RE: req/ADD: Football Crazy
From: Jim Carroll
Date: 05 Sep 10 - 11:00 AM

THE WHITE TORNADO
Ewan MacColl and Jim O'Connor

I know a smashin' fella, and his name is Paul,
He's the apple of his country's eye when he kicks a rugby ball ;
His teeth are white as ivory, his skin's like fairy snow,
He's built like Table Mountain from his tonsils to his toes.

chorus.
And. oh, he's football crazy, he's gone clean mad!
And he's the best ambassador his country's ever had,
He's handsome as a racehorse with a kick like dynamite,
He's six-foot-three and fifteen stone and (best of all) he's white.

He's pure as any virgin, a credit to the race,
No thought has ever left its mark upon that handsome face;
To see him stripped for action fills rugger fans with pride,
He's one of Vorster's supermen in the famous Springbok side.
Chorus

That his pedigree was spotless was obvious to
All from the time when in his cradle he lay playing with his ball.
So they built him up with outs pan to help him grow each day,
And evicted his black neighbours so he'd have more room to play
Chorus

In the middle of the game at Newport the notion came to Paul,
That (apart from cops and skinheads) no one loved him at all;
The crowd was trying to throw him with arguments and such,
They might as well have saved their breath, for his brains are in his crotch.
Chorus

One night as Paul lay sleeping, he had the strangest dream-
He thought that Adolf Hitler made him captain of the team;
Tricky Dick was in reserve and so was Marshal Ky,
And, there as large as life, was Enoch Powell as referee.
Chorus

The Springboks they were three points down the crowd began to howl,
When Paul, with perfect timing, passed the ball to Enoch Powell;
The two of em charged up the field, no-one could match their pace,
They scored the winning try and saved the Anglo-Saxon race.

Jim Carroll

Subject: RE: req/ADD: Football Crazy
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 06 Sep 10 - 01:01 AM

Dave Mackenzie:   Thanks for ref back to that earlier thread. I clicked on it to see if I had ever come across it before and found to my amazement that it was a thread that I had started myself just a year ago & forgotten every word about. Woe alas, I must be getting old...

~Michael~

Subject: RE: req/ADD: Football Crazy
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 06 Sep 10 - 08:11 PM

Here's a YouTube video with a recording of the original song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wDRBDX3nt_o

What instrument is that in the back, the soft one that's playing towards the end?

Subject: RE: req/ADD: Football Crazy
From: GUEST,Suibhne Astray
Date: 07 Sep 10 - 04:40 AM

I can hear guitar & mandolin - & a lot of echo! What year was this?

Subject: RE: req/ADD: Football Crazy
From: Joe Offer
Date: 07 Sep 10 - 04:59 AM

Ewan MacColl's recording of the song bears the title "Gaelic Football" on the Lloyd/MacColl/RoyHarris album titled Bold Sportsmen All.

-Joe-

Subject: RE: req/ADD: Football Crazy
From: Jim Carroll
Date: 07 Sep 10 - 08:19 AM

This is the note to Seamus Ennis' version in the BBC rchive
PAUL AND THE FOOTBALL CLUB

Singer:                                                         
Seamus Ennis                1m.39s        13775
Dublin.
19.9.49 (R.V.A.G..)        
'You all know my big brother and his Christian name is Paul/He lately joined the football club for he's mad about football....'
                
A modern humorous song, probably composed in the district of Kerry where it was heard.   

Ennis would presumably have collected it when he was working for the Irish Folklore Commission (never been able to find out what RVAG stands for in the index)
The Hall and McGregor version was issued in the early 1960s - I think, some time after 'Bold Sportsman All' was released (late fifties).
MacColl learned it from Ennis.
Jim Carroll

Subject: RE: req/ADD: Football Crazy
From: Jim McLean
Date: 07 Sep 10 - 09:28 AM

I posted a link on a previous thread which gives the derivation and story behinf Fitba' Crazy. Dooley's Fitba' Club

Subject: RE: Lyr Req/Add: Football Crazy
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Aug 13 - 10:36 PM

Oh The Game was played on Sunday
In Heavens own backyard
With Jesus playing quarterback and Moses playing guard
The Angels in the Grandstand my gosh how they did yell
When Jesus scored a touchdown against the boys from hell.

Chorus                 Stay with God
Stay with God
Jesus on the 6 yard line JESUS You're doing fine
Stay with God
Stay with God
Rock-um Sock-um