BS: Iraq Jack

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 11 Feb 06 - 07:19 PM

Well, the 'p' is still silent... :-)

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 11 Feb 06 - 05:37 PM

Not my Raven... you can hear him rootling about in the litter tray for ages before he settles.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 11 Feb 06 - 07:21 AM

Actually, ther real cat names (every ca knows it's own real name!) are

Spqueak & Bpubbles...


as you know every cat has a silent 'p'....

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 10 Feb 06 - 12:38 PM

Whatever......


: )

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: pixieofdoom
Date: 10 Feb 06 - 12:19 PM

Is that for Phot or for Jack?

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 10 Feb 06 - 11:51 AM

You may be thinking of the jacket with the zippered holes and spangly straps.....

Send me your measurements and I'll see what I can knock up.....

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Phot
Date: 10 Feb 06 - 09:52 AM

Hey Khatt, back to front jackets.........I'm not that kinky..................Well maybe!!

Wassail!! Chris

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 10 Feb 06 - 07:47 AM

WHAT?? More than one Squeak?? It's not allowed *I* am THE Squeak!

The puppies had their first outing into the garden today.... they also had their first dunking in the pond. They've been drying out on the radiator since this morning... much like their mother is drying out at Chez Patterson (but probably without the duckweed)!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 10 Feb 06 - 07:03 AM

Thread Drift...

My current older cat is called Squeak - her new companion - a half sister from her mum's next litter is called Bubbles

viz : Bubble & Squeak...

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: GUEST,Aunty Khatt
Date: 10 Feb 06 - 06:21 AM

Jack, Jolene is back and trying to sober up. We may have to put her into rehab for a couple of days to dry out but she will be fine. She is going to stay with the Squeak tomorrow and she will be reunited with the pups...and the cats....and Limpit. I'm sure she will feel better then.

Now you behave yourself Jack and make sure you and Phot come back to us all in one piece...or in a back to front jacket!

Aunty Khatt x

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Mudcat Jack
Date: 10 Feb 06 - 01:58 AM

I dunno why Phot is gigglin so much, has someone bin givin him stuff? I like Snatches too. Can't wait to get back to Joline..................It aint fair, she's in Ireland gettin pissed on whiskey wiv Auntie Khatt, an I is stuck here not gettin nuffink, dere aint even brasso out here. I is wonderin if Joline could smuggle herself out here, den we could get somthin together............Heh, heh, heh!

I is off watching aeroplanes with Phot now, Bye!

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 09 Feb 06 - 05:10 PM

Keep giggling Phot, maybe they'll send you home early with one of those nice back to front jackets.....

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Phot
Date: 09 Feb 06 - 08:59 AM

LOL Jane! A snatch is somthing I enjoy spending quite a lot of time in!!



























Out here a Snatch is an armoured Landrover, which comes in quite handy if some bugger is waving an AK 47 in your direction!

Wassail!! Chris (Still giggling like a nutter!!)

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Mrs.Duck
Date: 09 Feb 06 - 08:09 AM

Jack is the original weapon of miss destruction and should be kept as far from the snatch as possible!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From:
Date: 09 Feb 06 - 07:16 AM

We've managed to stop Jolene drinking the meths but she is determind to get her trailer trash paws on my bottle of Feckin' Whiskey!! I will return her to The Squeaks and her puppies on Saturday!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 09 Feb 06 - 07:11 AM

I disagree... whilst staying with us he did leave a half empty bottle... mind you, it was Brasso..... Didn't do him any good but he had a lovely finish.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 09 Feb 06 - 05:14 AM

Jack the alium? I bet he knows his onions!

Nodding Wild Onion ? He's certainly wild!!

G

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Morticia
Date: 09 Feb 06 - 04:37 AM

half-empty bottle? That's not Jack you have there, it must be an imposter or an alium.Everyone knows Jack never leaves a drop.

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: ranger1
Date: 08 Feb 06 - 04:38 PM

One never knows where Jack is concerned...

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Phot
Date: 08 Feb 06 - 11:45 AM

I'm just wondering what time in the morning he'll turn up this time, with what half empty bottle, how much half eaten pizza all over the floor, and just how much of the mess silver!

Wassail!! Chris

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: pixieofdoom
Date: 08 Feb 06 - 11:36 AM

They shouldn't invite him...............he's worser than vampires

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Phot
Date: 08 Feb 06 - 10:47 AM

Batten down the hatches folks, someone in their infinite wisdom!??? Has invited Jack and myself to the officers mess tonight, for someones leaving party....Anyone know a good lawyer? Coz I think Jack is going to be tapping the boards tommrow!

Wassail!! Chris

PS. Its STILL raining out here! And you should have seen the thunder storm we had last night! So much for a bloody desert!!

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: pixieofdoom
Date: 07 Feb 06 - 06:52 AM

It's the more the chaos he causes when he doesn't find one

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Phot
Date: 07 Feb 06 - 05:10 AM

The last thing that mad mutt needs is a parachute! What happens if he takes it into his head to jump out of a helecopter over Basra? Just imagine the chaos he could cause looking for a bar!

Wassail!! Chris

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Alba
Date: 05 Feb 06 - 01:50 PM

refresh

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 05 Feb 06 - 05:38 AM

Jack - Jolene is in Ireland keeping an eye on Khatt and Micca, while the pups are with me. I will try to teach them some manners, but it's an uphill struggle. So far they haven't eaten anything they shouldn't have... but that's only because I don't leave the chocolate out overnight again and Limpit hides her curry down the back of the sofa.

Glad to hear Phot is taking care of you.... would you like a parachute?

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Mudcat Jack
Date: 05 Feb 06 - 02:13 AM

Ullo, it is me again. Phot has buggered off an left me alone again in the room, I is not avin any more parties for a bit coz Phot threw his teddy out of der cot after the last wun, still was a bloody good party though! I is missin Joline an der pups, coz it is a long way back home. You did say you wus makin me a a combat jacket love, could you urry up as I might be goin out wiv Phot next week, an last time I did, we wuz in a helecopter type fing, and you knows me an bein travel sick, I threw up all over Phots vidio camara. Dunno why he was upset though, I ate up all the lumpy bits! All he had to do wuz clean off der slime, his mate Griff got sum good piccys though, of me lookin all brave again, when we gets time we'll put them up on my site.

More news soon, Jack

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Amos
Date: 03 Feb 06 - 11:28 AM

Thanks, Freda. I have heard other tunes relating to travels to Gundegai. The name alone makes it sound exotic and curious.

It is located at -35.069362 degrees latitude, 148.104117 degrees longitude, and about 745 feet altitude, shouuld anyone wish to visit.

Here's a view from above (if it works).
A

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Snuffy
Date: 03 Feb 06 - 10:47 AM

The (alleged) original version with the missing "h" is here in the DT NINE MILES FROM GUNDAGAI.

That dog sounds more like the Jack I know

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: freda underhill
Date: 03 Feb 06 - 09:42 AM

It was originally written by someone under the pen name 'Bowyang Yorke', Amos. It was a poem about the early pioneers of Australia, who went west and south from Sydney, looking for the source of the Murrumbidgee River. Many went to the area around Gundagai district in the period 1830-50.

They were tough times with supplies being transported along bush tracks by bullock teams. To pass the time while often being bogged, or for the river level to fall at crossings such as Muttama Creek near Gundagai, 'bullockies' would recite doggerel and rhymes picked up on their travels - and, sometimes, even write a few lines. Often on such occasions the bullocky's dog would sit guarding its master's tuckerbox and possessions while he was away seeking help.

The poem of 'The Dog on the Tuckerbox' was written some time in the 1850s. The original author used the pen name 'Bowyang Yorke', then the verse was amended some time later and promoted as a poem by Jack Moses. Jack O'Hagan put it to music in 1937. There is now a statue of the dog on the tuckerbox outside Gundagai !

(hope you enjoyed that Phot!)

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Amos
Date: 03 Feb 06 - 09:11 AM

What a grand song, Freda!

Whose is it?


A

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Snuffy
Date: 03 Feb 06 - 08:44 AM

Aren't there a few "h"s missing there, Freda?

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: freda underhill
Date: 03 Feb 06 - 08:21 AM

As I was coming down Conroy's Gap,
I heard a maiden cry;
'There goes Bill the Bullocky,
He's bound for Gundagai.
A better poor old beggar
Never earnt an honest crust,
A better poor old beggar
Never drug a whip through dust.'
His team got bogged at the nine mile creek,
Bill lashed and swore and cried;
'If Nobby don't get me out of this,
I'll tattoo his bloody hide.'
But Nobby strained and broke the yoke,
And poked out the leader's eye;
Then the dog sat on the Tucker Box
Nine miles from Gundagai...

I've done my share of shearing sheep,
Of droving and all that;
And bogged a bullock team as well,
On a Murrumbidgee flat.
I've seen the bullock stretch and strain
And blink his bleary eye,
And the dog sit on the tuckerbox
Nine miles from Gundagai.
I've been jilted, jarred and crossed in love,
And sand-bagged in the dark,
Till if a mountain fell on me,
I'd treat it as a lark.
It's when you've got your bullocks bogged,
That's the time you flog and cry,
And the dog sits on the tuckerbox
Nine miles from Gundagai.


We've all got our little troubles,
In life's hard, thorny way.
Some strike them in a motor car
And others in a dray.
But when your dog and bullocks strike,
It ain't no apple pie,
And the dog sat on the tuckerbox
Nine miles from Gundagai.

x freda

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Phot
Date: 03 Feb 06 - 05:49 AM

Just back from a little three day jaunt around doing stuff, but I made the mistake of leaving Jack in charge of my accomodation. BIG mistake! The little sod has been having parties with the dog section, There's half eaten Bonio's and empty beer tins everywhere! That does it, next time he's coming too, and hes doing top cover from the snatch!

Wassail!! Chris

PS. Dust storm this morning, and now its pi**ing down with rain! I wish I was at home!

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: lady penelope
Date: 30 Jan 06 - 04:15 PM

Giok, it's no use you know, Pixie won't pay you any more money for putting cards in phone boxes than she already has........

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: ranger1
Date: 30 Jan 06 - 04:00 PM

Jack, Henry says to mind your Ps and Qs, he hasn't got any contacts in Iraq to bail you out this time. And Mrs. Possum is considering suing you for child support...

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 30 Jan 06 - 11:03 AM

Well Pixie I heard your tours of all those low joints [ankles?] in Aldershot were for the purposes of research, and that you were plannning to open a Morris and Pole Dancing dive called Bells and Baldricks. With Idris as the main attraction, just strutting around in those leather trousers that some female Mudcatters still dream about! Jolene I hear will be doing the dance of the Seven Army Surplus Blankets, complete with soft music and iron rations.
It is no good denying it I have seen the business cards in phone boxes as far south as Basra.
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: pixieofdoom
Date: 30 Jan 06 - 10:38 AM

That probably wouldn't be difficult

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 29 Jan 06 - 06:16 PM

Funny, they seem to be getting on like a house afire with my kitties.. maybe they have better manners than yours!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: pixieofdoom
Date: 29 Jan 06 - 09:55 AM

So that's where they are.......they ran off after a disagreement with one of my cats and I've not seen them since. I've been searching every strip club and seedy dive in Aldershot.....taken me two weeks so far and I'm only up to D

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: GUEST,Joleen
Date: 28 Jan 06 - 05:18 PM

Dont wurry ma darlin' Ahm tying a yeller gibbon round that oak tree fur ya, ma hunny.

Should Ah be mekin youall a camelflaj jakit?

Joleen

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: SINSULL
Date: 28 Jan 06 - 04:46 PM

Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene!
I'm begging of you please don't take my man.
Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene!
Please don't take him just because you can.

Now it's a music thread.

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 28 Jan 06 - 04:36 PM

I would just like to state that I did not offer to put up with Jolene and the pups... they just moved back in.... and I'd only just got the carpet smelling right again.

Don't think they're staying for the duration.....

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Catherine Jayne
Date: 28 Jan 06 - 03:19 PM

Jack I do hope you are behaving yourself out there.

I can confirm....just to put you mind at rest, that Jolene and the pubs are staying with LTS. I have seen them today and they are settling into life in the wilds of East London well. They are all missing you loads and are asking the Goddess for your safe return.

Behave yourself

Love Aunty Khatt and Uncle Micca x

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Alba
Date: 28 Jan 06 - 11:12 AM

Sins..shhhhhhhhhhhhhh...Phot has enough to content with (lol)
Phot can you burn some essential oils... may help with the pong:)
Jude

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: SINSULL
Date: 28 Jan 06 - 10:46 AM

Has he been neutered yet?

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 28 Jan 06 - 08:38 AM

He can't spell Jacqui, and he thinks it's short for Jemima, he has always fancied Imran's ex wife.
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: jacqui.c
Date: 28 Jan 06 - 08:19 AM

Just trying to imagine Jack in the gym! Doesn't seem quite his style.

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: pixieofdoom
Date: 28 Jan 06 - 07:25 AM

I just hope Jack isn't teaching them any bad words!

Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack
From: Phot
Date: 28 Jan 06 - 06:30 AM

I'm not letting him drink tonight, he's coming down the gym with me! Thing is, out here its not just soldiers that are a bad influence, there's the RAF, and the RN too! I'm being good though,........Honest!


Wassail!! Chris