BS: Obit: My Dad

Subject: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Partridge
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 01:45 PM

click here

Its over a year since my dad died but I feel as if it was yesterday. All my emotions have been on stop until the inquest was over. If you get ill in Northumberland don't go to the Wansbeck hospital.
I know everyone says that their dad is the best, well mine was and I miss him.

love
Pat x

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: wysiwyg
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 01:54 PM

(((((((( Pat ))))))))))

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: katlaughing
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 02:11 PM

Oh, what a senseless tragedy. My dad's been gone over two years and I still reach for the phone to tell him something. All my sympathy and hugs are yours, Pat.

love,

kat

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Alba
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 02:17 PM

Pat all I can do is send you {{{{{Hugs}}}}}
Love
Jude

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Alec
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 02:24 PM

Pat a hideous injustice was done to your father.
Nothing I can do or say will change that, but I must let you know that you are in my thoughts.
I must also let you know that for the first time in my life I am ashamed of the county I come from.
Take care & remember that nobody fully dies while someone who genuinely loved them lives.
Alec

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Mrs.Duck
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 02:27 PM

{{{{{{{{Pat}}}}}}}}}

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: fat B****rd
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 02:49 PM

All of the above, Pat. Best regards from Charlie.

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: GUEST,saulgoldie
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 02:54 PM

My deepest condolences, Pat.

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: alanabit
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 02:57 PM

My condolences. I hope the good memories come back to console you.

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: skipy
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 03:00 PM

So sad to read this,
Skipy

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Micca
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 03:33 PM

Pat, My deepest sympathies and lots of hugs to you too

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Partridge
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 03:50 PM

Thanks for all your kind thoughts, very much neeeded.

Pat xxxxxxxxx

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Slag
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 04:01 PM

God bless you Pat. I just lost my Dad Sep 21, '06. Though I don't know the details of your tragedy the lousy hospital here contributed much to the demise of my father. You have my sincere condolences.

Tom

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 04:05 PM

Losing a father is hard enough without it having been caused by medical care improperly given.

A huge cosmic hug to you and I hope the hospital truly cleans up its act. Besides a father, you've also had your ability to trust medical providers taken from you.

It won't bring your father back, but remember that those whom you have once held in your heart are never gone.

My deepest condolences.

Linn

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: catspaw49
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 04:57 PM

Good Lord Pat, that isn't just tragic, that's criminal.   All my best thoughts are yours and your family. Truly senseless, but that doesn't make the pain any less............

My Dad has been gone 35 years now and my Mom 40 years in November. Not a day goes by that I don't think of them both. Iam now older than either of them lived to be and it always seems odd.....so many times I still want their advice.

Many hugs...Much Love

Pat/Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Bee
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 05:23 PM

So sorry, Pat. When a death is so un-necessary, it seems even harder to bear.

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Hawker
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 05:25 PM

Sending you kind thoughts, an injustice indeed.
Much Love, Lucy X

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 05:30 PM

Sympathy.

If you get sick, don't do it in North Kent.

The locals call Darenth Valley "Death Valley".

Medway Maritime ("Murdertime") killed my wife. They put her on a ventilator, sedated her and restrained her hands, and then failed to ensure the ventilation tube did not get blocked. That was just how they finished the job.

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: freda underhill
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 05:41 PM

Pat, your Dad looked like a lovely man. I know how you feel, thinking about him, a year is not a long time. Like you and like Richard, I have lost a loved one to medical negligence (my mother) it's a shock, everything happens so quickly, and there's no going back.

all my best wishes

freda

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Ebbie
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 06:15 PM

I'm speechless. {{{{{hug}}}}}

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: CapriUni
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 07:26 PM

{{{{{{{{{{{{{Partridge}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Death is always hard, and the timing of grief can be just as hard, even in the best of times, much less when the world keeps getting in your way.

Just know that you are still loved and cared for, and work at your own pace, not the world's.

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: kendall
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 07:41 PM

Unfortunatly, the older we get the more loved ones we lose. I just made a list of close friends, (not relatives or mere aquaintences) that have passed on in the last 5 years. Eleven.
One of them was in the hospital for a series of treatments, and he died of a heart attack one night. (Not related to the treatments).

You have my sympathy, but no words are enough.

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Houston_Diamond
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 07:56 PM

I feel so much for you Pat {{{Hugs}}}.

The NHS are so bad at dealing with things... I felt like crying when I read this article in the Metro today (found at http://www.metro.co.uk/news/article.html?in_article_id=34563&in_page_id=34 for all those who cant click the link)

A hospital is a place to recover not deteriorate!

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Elmer Fudd
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 07:58 PM

Very sorry for your loss. Hands across the ocean.

Elmer

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: GUEST,petr
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 07:59 PM

my deepest sympathy for your loss.
My dad has had to start kidney dialysis - (pd) last sept and I was amazed at the incompetence at the hospital and lack of communication.
he came out of it and is doing better now, and the best thing was getting out of the hospital.
So each day is just a gift to have him around, and now he can enjoy his two granddaughters. (2yrs and 2mths)

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Janie
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 09:34 PM

Pat, another {{{{{{{{{{{{hug}}}}}}}}}}}}. Peace be with you.

Janie

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Metchosin
Date: 26 Jan 07 - 12:50 AM

Oh dear....not much I can add that hasn't already been expressed, except to say that you are in my thoughts too, Pat.

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Morticia
Date: 26 Jan 07 - 03:57 AM

(((hugs)))

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 26 Jan 07 - 04:51 AM

It's 3 years today since my Mother died!
G.

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: guitar
Date: 26 Jan 07 - 04:58 AM

on the 17th of Jan 2006 my father died, while we were on holiday in Australia, and 17 years previous my mother died also on holiday in Australia, so I know how much sadness it brings.
however just remember they are still alive in our memories.
and just remmeber the good times you had
tom

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: gnu
Date: 26 Jan 07 - 05:45 AM

Thoughts and prayers to each.

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: My guru always said
Date: 26 Jan 07 - 07:57 AM

Thinking of you Pat, and all of us who have lost loved ones, whether naturally or by misfortune. {{{{{{Group Hug}}}}}}

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: jacqui.c
Date: 26 Jan 07 - 10:24 AM

So sorry Pat - the death of a loved one is bad enough, but this goes beyond belief, particularly as the hospital seems not to want to apologise.

I hope that you can get closure soon and just have good memories of your Dad.

Thanks for letting us share this, and the warning that we cannot always trust those who are supposed to know what is in our best interests. There is a need for hypervigilance in any hospital stay. I know that if any of mine are in I will be questioning what is going on. I'd rather be thought a pain in the arse than let something slide by. It's just a shame that people have to die to teach us this lesson.

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Partridge
Date: 26 Jan 07 - 03:27 PM

Thank you all so so much for your kindness and your hugs. I have millions of wonderful memories of my Dad. I try not to think of him just prior to his death - as this was not him, I remember the man who taught me how to make funny faces, and the man who introduced me to the music I will love forever. He always told me that " life is for the living" and I believe that. But its so good to have friends that give you support when life gets a bit difficult.

My advice to anyone who has a loved one in a hospital is to be their eyes and ears and speak up for them. Hind sight is a wonderful thing

I believe in an afterlife, so I know I will be reunited with my dad, I just want it sooner rather that later.

Pat xxxx

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: SINSULL
Date: 26 Jan 07 - 03:35 PM

I am sorry that you lost your Dad, Partridge, and sorrier that it had to be this way. Keep fighting the good fight. The very least they owe you and your family is an apology and a plan preventing it from happening to anyone else.
SINS

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: GUEST,ib48
Date: 27 Jan 07 - 09:36 AM

i know how you feel,my thoughts go out to you.

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: jimlad9
Date: 28 Jan 07 - 07:57 AM

To all of you who have responded to this thread, I have to tell you that the pain never goes away. My dad died in 1972 and hardly a day goes by without me wishing I could see him again and seek his advice on matters that trouble me. I only have to hear that song "The Living Years" and it's Kleenex time.

As for cleanliness in our Hospitals, a friend of mine who sadly died last week was told that a place was ready for him in the Royal Bolton Hospital. His MacMillan nurse was horrified at the prospect of his being placed in what is in everyone's mind a germ-ridden place (MRSA is Us) and she got him into the Bolton Hospice for the last 8 weeks of his life.


Pat

Like you, I know that there is an afterlife. I hope your dad and my dad have met up they sound as if they would get along together. When my dad died his Golf Handicap was 18 so I hope they don't play for money !.

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Partridge
Date: 28 Jan 07 - 12:56 PM

Jimlad9, my Dads handicap was about the same, so they will be evenly matched!
I know what you mean about "the living years" it gives me a lump in the throat.

I've waited over a year for this verdict, and I don't know how I feel, its very strange, Again I thank you all for your support.
((((((((((hugs))))))))))) to all of you,

love

Pat xx

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Jeanie
Date: 28 Jan 07 - 01:10 PM

So sorry to hear about this. Thinking of you and all your family,
With much love,
- jeanie

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Mooh
Date: 29 Jan 07 - 09:44 AM

My sympathies, especially given the circumstances.

No matter how "well adjusted" (sorry if that description doesn't quite fit) we think of ourselves, there will always be those times when we search for parental comfort and guidance. In time that can only be from within. Every time I hear 1 Corinthians 13, like yesterday, I am reminded of those feelings of loss experienced each of the several times I've read it at family funerals.

Still waiting for the hurt to pass.

Peace, Mooh.

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: GUEST,Greycap
Date: 29 Jan 07 - 07:06 PM

I lost my dear dad to prostate cancer 6 years ago and miss him every day, every hour and every minute.
He was my hero, my friend, my role model, apart from his excessive drinking. I wish he was back here with me.
Some parts of life's journey you can't change.
You have my utmost sympathy,sometimes life's a bastard.
Roger

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Partridge
Date: 30 Jan 07 - 02:03 PM

Yeah, tonights a bastard.... My dad liked a drink, but he was also my hero.

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: katlaughing
Date: 30 Jan 07 - 02:36 PM

Last night, I was in bed and my mind went walkabout. It came flush up against a brick wall which said "No! This cannot be!" I was suffused with a feeling of surreal disbelief that I was actually an orphan. My mind reeled, I shook my head back and forth and said aloud, "No!" It felt so unreal, I was confronted anew with the monumental loss of my mother and my father. It was unbelieveable to me, at that intense moment, that I would never see them again; never hear them, again; never be able to speak with them, again; sing with them, again; listen to them, again. It is such a deep, deep sense of loss. While I hope my time here is a long one, I will be deeply grateful when I die to see them again and in the meantime, I give thanks for any little *connections* with them I may experience. May it be so for all who suffer such great loss.

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Partridge
Date: 31 Jan 07 - 01:56 AM

I too have moments where being an orphan is overwhelming. Deep down somewhere, I know they are still with me and always will be. But there is a longing for the physical hug, and words of encouragement.
As a child, I remember thinking that I was sure that i would die if my Dad did. Well, now that I'm growed up I know that things are different and you have to get on with life, but its hard.
I treasure my connections that happen on a daily basis - the song on the radio, the pennies, and many other little things.

Most of the time I live alone, in some ways its good if I feel like a good cry, then there are no holds barred, but sometimes when a little disraction is needed, I've no one to turn to. I try not fall into the chasm of self pity.

No, life is for living, so I'd better get on with it and learn whatever lesson I came here for.

Pat xx

Subject: RE: BS: Obit: My Dad
From: Pistachio
Date: 02 Feb 07 - 05:47 PM

Pat, turn to Mudcat, life is for living and you are not alone even if you feel lost on your own. There is always someone here for you. My Dad died in 1984 on his 66th Birthday. It was such a shock and my grief took me by surprise but there are so many happy memories to make me smile. Hold on to your memories. Cry if you feel like crying - it is such a release of emotion you WILL feel better.    ((((HUGS))))
Hazel. x