BS: The romance of breaking bones

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: GUEST
Date: 04 Mar 12 - 04:41 PM

In 1990 I was carrying a bag of files in each hand and opening the door of a train with my left hand, when without warning the train started to move, wrenching my thumb which became fractured. This was a week before playing guitar in a show based on The Mysteries.

My hand and lower arm was put in NHS Plaster locally, which removed the pain but was very uncomfortable. The next day my GP referred me to a private hospital for a more comfortable plaster which enabled me to play in the show. My consultant told me that the injury would give me slight discomfort in years to come - he was right, in cold weather it hurts like crazy!

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: gnu
Date: 04 Mar 12 - 04:09 PM

Nick... odd how that can happen. My old man was advancing down a street of row housing in WW2 by blowing out basement walls. He was carry a Bren and ammo down some stairs and one of the stairs was missing. He felt his neck crack and it was very painful and he could barely move his neck. But there was a job to be done.

In the 60's, the pain became chronic. When he was examined by a doc at CFB Camp Borden in Ontario, the doc asked how he had gotten there. "Drove." The doc went out and looked at his car. Dad asked why and the reply was he wanted to know if Dad had been in a car accident. "Why?" "You have a broken neck." Twenty years with a broken neck and pain. Odd indeed.

And, I'd stick with the football story... the barstool... no. >;-)

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: EBarnacle
Date: 04 Mar 12 - 02:29 PM

Sheesh, what a bunch of wrecks we are!

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: Nick
Date: 04 Mar 12 - 09:12 AM

Mind you I did find out recently I had dislocated my kneecap at a gig a few years ago and not realised because it had gone back. Not very good with injuries.

Snapping the cruciate in my right knee gtting off a bar stool was misinterpreted too. (It was already torn from playing football)

I he a discussion with work tomorrow about what is practical over the next period so I'll practice the appropriate story.

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: Janie
Date: 03 Mar 12 - 11:44 PM

Definitely go with Will's offering - adventure AND romance - unbeatable combo.

I'm shuffling along pretty good with a broken left patella in a knee immobolizer and an opposite leg that was unaffected. Reading of your injuries puts merely being in the knee immobilizer a few more tiresome weeks in perspective.

Heal well, and heal fast!

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: Gurney
Date: 03 Mar 12 - 11:39 PM

I think the potter gave you the perfect cover story. Embellish that.

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Mar 12 - 10:29 PM

Tell them that you were on a classified mission and can't talk about it, but that you did accomplish the mission.

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: JennieG
Date: 03 Mar 12 - 05:10 PM

My broken arm a couple of years ago was pretty prosaic....rolled on my ankle on a rough edge of footpath and down I went. Didn't put my arms out to break the fall, but nonetheless ended up spraining my right wrist and breaking both radius and ulna at the wrist end in my left arm. Bummer was.....we were on holiday in Canada at the time.....it was a holiday souvenir I didn't want!

When people asked how it happened, once I had recovered my sense of humour, I would say "you know sometimes things fall down,and they break? well......"

Cheers
JennieG

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 03 Mar 12 - 02:50 PM

Ouch, Nick! I broke bones in my foot when I tripped over a tree root taking my class down a path to a field for the school's field day. That's a pretty boring story, too. However, because it was a few days before the school year's end, I did well financially. Teachers are paid for the number of days in the school year, and I had more than enough sick leave to cover those last few days I took out, earning my full year's salary. Then the personnel director called a few days into summer vacation and said I should watch the mail for disability checks throughout the summer. I told him I knew disability insurance would cover any medical copays not included in my health plan, but I asked why I qualified for disability checks. He told me the school department had to assume I would have got a job teaching summer school!

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Mar 12 - 02:08 PM

I have a scar on the outside of my right leg, just above the knee, from a slash with a corn knife (think heavy short machete or bolo knife if you aren't familiar with corn knives). I've had surgery on both knees to clean up after injuries. My left rotator cuff has been repaired, and just before last Christmas I was under the knife to repair a ruptured right distal bicep (tore the right bicep loose as the elbow). And there's a scar over my right eye, in the eyebrow.

1. I got cut on the leg by another Boy Scout when we were chopping weeds out of a field of soy beans. Unlike the embezzlement he did later in life, this was an accident.

2. I damaged my right knee by falling in the middle of a parking lot which was empty save for my car.

3. I did the rotator cuff by stumbling against a pillar outside of a restaurant in Boise.

4. Falling down the last three steps did in my knee.

5. I tried to stop a guy from falling and ruptured the bicep.

6. The scar above my eye comes from the time my mother dropped mon my head.

Much has been made of these things, especially the last.

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: Nick
Date: 03 Mar 12 - 01:11 PM

Sinsull - taking them off not putting them on. Huuuge difference.

I'm thinking of perhaps going down the free running
route...

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: Bill D
Date: 03 Mar 12 - 01:06 PM

taking OFF trousers, SINSULL... no doubt trying to leap upward and slip them off both legs at the same time.... (the way I put mine on) ☺

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: gnu
Date: 03 Mar 12 - 01:05 PM

There comes an age when you can and DO put your pants on two legs at a time... when you know it should be done sitting down. >;-)

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: SINSULL
Date: 03 Mar 12 - 12:42 PM

You broke your leg putting on your trousers?
I am speechless...
And you admit to it - WOW
LOL
SINS
Hope you feel better.

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: gnu
Date: 03 Mar 12 - 12:32 PM

On the left side of my neck? Chainsaw chain broke. Wrapped it up, put on a spare chain, and finished cutting my cordage for the day before I hiked out to the road and went to the hospital. The left side? Buddy hooked me from behind and then slashed me with his skate. Wrapped it and scored a hat-trick but the trainer made me go to the hospital after the first period.

Tumours and stones tend to bore, even make some people uncomfortable.

Great story, Will!

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: Charley Noble
Date: 03 Mar 12 - 12:00 PM

Will-

That'll do!

Nick-

You could also explain that you had the lead part in a new play and as one of the cast on opening night whispered "Break a leg!" you were foolish enough to turn and glare at him, and then stumbled off the stage...

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: Will Fly
Date: 03 Mar 12 - 11:09 AM

"As the getaway car roared dangerously through the thronged city streets, Nick realised the only way to stop it and bring the criminals to justice was to intervene. As it careered towards the spot where he stood on the pavement, he hurled himself over the bonnet and against the windscreen. As he rolled over the roof of the vehicle, propelled there by the sheer speeds, he heard and felt the glass screen shatter under his weight. Blinded by the shattered glass, the driver hit the brake and brought the car to a screeching halt. Nick clung to the rear bumper as the car came to a halt and the driver and his crooked companion opened the doors and made as if to flee. With a mighty effort, Nick sprang up and kicked out against the driver's door, sending the crook hurtling, but breaking his fibula and spraining his ankle in the process. Ignoring the pain, he hopped around to the other side of the car and gave the accomplice a karate-style chop in the neck, dropping him like a sack of potatoes. Daphne rushed up to him, tears of adoration in her eyes and, throwing her arms around him, kissed him passionately, murmuring, "Oh, my wounded hero! My darling!"

That do you? Just learn by heart and recite on prompt...

Subject: RE: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: GUEST,999
Date: 03 Mar 12 - 10:56 AM

Well, Nick, may I suggest a mugging attempt by five to seven bad dudes and you intervening on behalf of the elderly lady who lives just down the street from you? It ain't perfect, but it's a start.

Subject: BS: The romance of breaking bones
From: Nick
Date: 03 Mar 12 - 10:49 AM

I have gone through my life up to last Saturday and avoided breaking a bone to my knowledge. Last Saturday I managed to break my right fibula and badly sprain my left ankle which means six weeks of relative immobility as one is sore from the operation and the other is not getting better as it has to take all my weight in its already rather poor state (nice yellow bruise from toe to almost the knee and still about twice its normal size after a week).

Anyway... I write this not for sympathy but from a different perspective.

Over the last few days in hospital I have met and shared stories about injuries and breaks with various people. To quote a couple -

* The chap opposite had fallen 30ft+ through a perspex roof, landed on his feet but broke his back
* The lad in the next bed had been out drinking too much and gone to his attic room, out the skylight to 'chill out' and fell off the roof - luckily not killing himself in the process but breaking his femur and elbow

How did I do mine?

I feel a bit embarrassed to say but - I was taking my trousers off. It somehow doesn't have the same romance does it?

One of the ladies in the Potting Shed (as they call the plastering area at the hospital - as an aside, if it were men I presume they'd call it the Casting Couch) asked whether it was in my haste to escape the clutches of a jealous husband returning unexpectedly from work but, unfortunately, nothing as glamorous or daring. Her reaction did however point out the need for a bone breakage to be linked with something slightly less mundane.

I have some weeks to polish up my story to give it the veneer of dash and excitement that I feel it deserves.