BS: rough folkie men

Subject: BS: rough folkie men
From: GUEST,trouble & squeak
Date: 24 May 05 - 09:01 AM

Its a festival. my big chance to listen to some good music, and, as my good friend Delilah so often points out, to meet a good man.

At 3 am on the third day, we're is the session bar, singing in long and quivering harmonies. I look around a little, and see the sweat patches under their armpits, the hairy legs, the matted beards, and i smell the reek of three day old funguis & urine on their filthy nailed fingers.

There's Folkie X - a bit of a lad, known as a good warbler and fast on his feet. I look at his bloodshot eyes, the hands which only just recently have been attached to some young woman's thigh, and the white beer beely, covered with thick black hair which emerges from under the ratty T-shirt. uurrrrggcchh.

and here's dear old Snorty. Once a rather fine looking bloke, his eyebrows now sweep towards the stars, while his mind is firmly in the gutter. Snorty emits a very dirty laugh as I walk past, sniggering to his mate.

sigh. really, Delilah - these folkie men are a rough lot.

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: GUEST,Lavender Lil
Date: 24 May 05 - 09:13 AM

You're being a little pessimistic there, T & S, while there is many a fungal male in a folk festival, there are also a few gems amongst the chaff. Take my good friend Spotty Pete, for example, admittedly he has a severe acne problem and sleeps in the back of his rusty old bomb of a car every night, but he has a heart of gold. While his feet may be a little putrid, he is the best harmonica player known to God's earth.

and our good old mate, Owen Bucks - whiskers, dribble, but WHAT a repertoire for a session. He is the only person I know who can fart "the Mountains of Mourne" while tap dancing.

and as for armpit smell - don't be tooo fussy, dear T & S - its nothing to the odour of dried vomit in the lounge room after a long night's swilling. really girl, i think you're being just too fussy. Pull yourself together and face reality - WHAT YOU SMELL IS WHAT YOU GET.

TTFN,

Lil.

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: Paco Rabanne
Date: 24 May 05 - 09:14 AM

Agreed. Us flamenco boys on the other hand, are always clean of limb and un bearded.
                Brut spalsh on, the true path!

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: GUEST,Batty Betty
Date: 24 May 05 - 09:18 AM

dearest trouble, i know you've had a hard life. be true to yourself - dont stink to the lowest common denominator (and i MEAN common).

folk music is like hypnotic honey - it lures you in, saturates you, and makes you completely addicted to it. the men in the scene you could just regard as flies in the honey. a little difficult to swallow at times, but there all the same.

what is wrong with a set of muscular thighs and body hair? there is nothing more appealing than a rainbow tattoo'd nipple - on a man. who wants a pink and clean office boy?

think about it, honey.

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: Alba
Date: 24 May 05 - 09:19 AM

LOL ted...BRUT!!! oh no!!!

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: GUEST,trouble n Squeak
Date: 24 May 05 - 09:21 AM

i find it hard to sing out with joy when i'm next to rancid boy..


... * sigh * ...

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: GUEST,Picker
Date: 24 May 05 - 09:35 AM

Hey, girl. You want one of them girly boys, you go to them clubs and things. You want a real man, you come to folk festivals. Ain't none of them panty-wearing poofs at a real festival. Us men there are real men. Take me. I drive a D-9 caterpillar bulldozer during the day, pushing over mountains and trees when I'm not shooting off some dynamite, and play a genuine Martin Dreadnought to make music with. Ain't none of them nancy-boys who sit in an office all day do that. Yeah, so I'm a little whiff at times, but I guess you ain't never smelled a real man before.

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: GUEST,Delilah
Date: 24 May 05 - 09:37 AM

Yeah tas, i know whatcha mean. Last bloke i got on wif at a festival, we were in his panel van, doin' whatcha do, y'know, and 'e 'ad 'is dawg in there too, an' all 'is dirty socks an' other stuff lyin' around, like old tinnies 'n' rubbish and that, an' there was this kinda black stuff growin' round the edges of the winders - like, i fink 'e lives in there all the time, know wot i mean?

Anyways, we wuz just gettin' sorta hot'n'heavy like, then 'e sez "Wanna see my pet snake?" Well i tell ya tas, I was outta that place like a shot, i mean like, enuff's enuff, know wot i mean? He's probly got a pet croc in there to i bet. I don't care if 'e is kinda cute an' all, wif them fethers in 'is 'at. Cum to fink of it, i wonder wheir 'e got them from? Probly killed some pore bird to get 'em. After all i do have standids y'know.

Del

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: gnu
Date: 24 May 05 - 10:02 AM

In a bar at 3AM on the third day?. I'd say you were lookin fer love in the wrong place, at the wrong time.

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 24 May 05 - 12:24 PM

Ah Delilah you sound antipodean to me, which could mean you're looking for a bloke who's big down under?
Giok ¦¬]

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 24 May 05 - 04:34 PM

Looks like I have an alter ego.... Trouble and Squeak - I hear where you're coming from.... but worse is fagbreath (or ciggiebreath for the left ponders)...

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: GUEST,Delilah
Date: 24 May 05 - 11:59 PM

Hey Giok, anti-podean? i ain't anti-anything, like, anyfing goes, know wot i mean? An' big down under, yeah, i could handle that, know wot i mean ha ha?

yeah, we sure got a lot of ants tho - we got big blue bull-ants, we got them red'n'black bastards, the hoppy joes, an' all sorts of others that bite ya, an' we got spiders too - we got redbacks fer the toilet seat - gotta watch them buggers y'know. We got funnel webs, we got huntsmen spiders big as yer hand, an' we got ROUGH FOLKIE MEN, god love 'em.

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 25 May 05 - 07:30 AM

Saw one of them huntsmen spiders in Melbourne Botanic gardens, Jaysus Keeerist!!!!
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: Micca
Date: 25 May 05 - 08:50 AM

Give me some men who are Rough Folkie men
Who will play me the Tunes I adore
Start me with ten who are Rough Folkie men
And you'll soon have have folks crying for more-ore

Shoulder to shoulder, and bolder and bolder
They sing as they go to the fore
Then there's nothing in the world
Can halt or mar a plan
When Rough Folkie men
Can sing together - man - to man...

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: John P
Date: 25 May 05 - 10:21 AM

Hey, I go to folk festivals and I manage to stay clean and not stink and wear clothes that cover me adequately. I don't paw women or eat with my mouth open. But I'm married. It's easy to see why some of these blokes aren't hitched up yet . . .

I guess you have to look for a recent divorcee or widower before he gets snatched up again.

JP

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 25 May 05 - 10:42 AM

I'm glad you cover your adequately!
G. ¦¬]

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: AggieD
Date: 25 May 05 - 05:09 PM

Know exactly what you mean T & S, it's what puts me off them late night sings at festivals. Trouble you've got is that all the decent males have been got at by us wifeys who won't allow our men to stink.

My advice is if you find one that's half decent, lure him to the nearest river, give him a good dunkin' & see if he scrubs up. If not go back & find another one & give him the same treatment. You never know one might just scrub up OK.

Good luck to you gal!

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 26 May 05 - 03:29 AM

Put him in 3 times and if he doesn't scrub up, take him out twice!
G¦¬]

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 26 May 05 - 04:32 AM

We know a song about this........!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: rough folkie men
From: Hand-Pulled Boy
Date: 28 May 05 - 09:27 PM

Members of 'harriwatts band' are totally removed of all body hair and can be available for inspection at any time. Pet snakes optional.