Let's write a song together!

Subject: Let's write a song together!
From: Jim Lad
Date: 19 Feb 07 - 11:04 PM

Let's write a song together, about the loss of a loved one from Cancer
The tune:... You choose.
Two lines apiece until four verses are completed.
No more than two lines per verse by any individual. (so no "Guest")
A complete work over by all when we're done (With a vote on the final version)
And finally; we each create a chorus (if needed) with a vote on that also.
No royalties attached or donate it to the cause.
Who's game?
First two lines.... (mind the meter)

It barely seems like yesterday,
You held me in your arms.

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 02:43 AM

A Mothers love for her only son,
Amongst the Devonshire farms.

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Alec
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 02:56 AM

It only seems like yesterday,
But twenty years,since then have past

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 03:07 AM

Lung cancer took you from us,
A year ago you breathed your last.

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: the fence
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 03:21 AM

But in my memories you remain
A light forever more

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 04:38 AM

Memories stay with us
So I'll always feel you near

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: the one
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 04:45 AM

sun is now setting, your out of harm

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: growler
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 07:01 AM

But I remember when you were young
Your future like the sun

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Jim Lad
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 07:09 AM

All very good for a four-line-song. I was aiming for four verses. Let's try and keep this soul alive for at least the first one. Mind your head on the meter!

Start again?
First two lines... By alec Whose next?

It only seems like yesterday,
But twenty years,since then have past

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Rasener
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 07:32 AM

I have this massive growth on my nose
Will they save me - no one knows

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Jim Lad
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 07:36 AM

Ok! Let it die.

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Scrump
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 07:40 AM

They buried you in the churchyard
And with you lies my heart

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Rasener
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 07:43 AM

Jim Lad my two lines are true. I can send you a photo if you could stomach it.

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Alec
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 07:44 AM

And that ought to have been "Passed".

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Rasener
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 07:46 AM

LOL

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Scrump
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 08:05 AM

Skipping the bits that don't seem like lines of the song, we have this so far:

It barely seems like yesterday,
You held me in your arms.
A Mothers love for her only son,
Amongst the Devonshire farms.

It only seems like yesterday,
But twenty years,since then have past
Lung cancer took you from us,
A year ago you breathed your last.

But in my memories you remain
A light forever more
Memories stay with us
So I'll always feel you near

sun is now setting, your out of harm

But I remember when you were young
Your future like the sun
I have this massive growth on my nose
Will they save me - no one knows

Ok! Let it die.

They buried you in the churchyard
And with you lies my heart

(we need 2 more lines to rhyme with those - anyone?)

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: the fence
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 09:12 AM

As long as I have these memories
We will never be apart

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Ross
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 09:14 AM

And on the wind, I hear you sing
As I ride me horse and cart

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Scrump
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 09:18 AM

Was that a crow I heard just then
Or did the horse just fart?

... I'll get me coat.

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: David C. Carter
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 09:37 AM

This is only a wild guess,but I think this song just went tits up!

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 12:34 PM

Tits up can be a pleasant thing,
Tits down too has a special ring.
Tits anywhere or so to speak,
Now let's hear from Liz the Squeak.

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Rasener
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 12:48 PM

LOL you get worse GS

Tits in the belfry
Tits on your nuts
Tits in the apple tree
Tits on the grass
Where else could your tits go
Why up the kyber pass

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Jim Lad
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 12:59 PM

Alright! Now I feel really stupid. I'm outa here!

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Rasener
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 01:00 PM

Don't go Jim Lad

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Jim Lad
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 01:02 PM

Ah. Ah. Ah... Cheerio!

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 04:05 PM

Can we please have another go and be a little sensitive to what this thread is really all about.

It barely seems like yesterday,
You held me in your arms.
A mothers love for her only son,
Amongst the Devonshire farms.

Next verse please.....

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Songster Bob
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 04:52 PM

Why cannot anyone stick to the meter, much less the sentiment?

And, by the bye, you're not writing a song, you know -- just a lyric.

Other'n that, Mrs. Lincoln, how was the play?

Bob

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: fat B****rd
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 03:53 AM

Now as I await my captain's call
To run through a foriegn land
I remember your gentle face
As I write with trembling hand

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Ross
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 04:34 AM

Well done Jim Lad - nice thread - sorry about the horse & cart

A bit better than the general up your arse threads, what's the point of being a folkie bollocks/lets have a moan

Scrumps original appraisal of the lines collected was quite nice

Anyone got a cracking tasteful last two lines?

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: GUEST
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 05:04 AM

And if i should sing the song we wrote,
      It will pierce love,like a dart.

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 05:06 AM

So its sentiment will travel far,
And maybe touch YOUR heart.

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Scrump
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 05:10 AM

Bah! I posted in this thread earlier, and my posting seems to have gone AWOL.

Anyway - apologies to Jim Lad for my last contribution yesterday, which was intended as a bit of fun. Jim Lad, don't give up, it's a grand idea. Here are the words so far (below). Jim Lad, as starter of this idea, please edit it to remove any words that don't seem correct, etc., and let's see the result so far.

It barely seems like yesterday,
You held me in your arms.
A Mothers love for her only son,
Amongst the Devonshire farms.

Now as I await my captain's call
To run through a foriegn land
I remember your gentle face
As I write with trembling hand [added by fB]

It only seems like yesterday,
But twenty years,since then have past
Lung cancer took you from us,
A year ago you breathed your last.

But in my memories you remain
A light forever more
Memories stay with us
So I'll always feel you near

sun is now setting, your out of harm

But I remember when you were young
Your future like the sun
I have this massive growth on my nose
Will they save me - no one knows

Ok! Let it die.

They buried you in the churchyard
And with you lies my heart
And if i should sing the song we wrote,
      It will pierce love,like a dart.
So its sentiment will travel far,
And maybe touch YOUR heart.

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: old salty
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 05:18 AM

sorry i was a guest on my bit.
                                       
       And if i should sing,the song we wrote
       It will pierce love,like a dart.

    All better now, reset me cookies!

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: LukeKellylives (Chris)
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 03:58 PM

So I sing my song now, loudly so you can hear it.
For if I sing loud enough, I believe, I may reach your spirit.

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: LukeKellylives (Chris)
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 03:59 PM

Forgot to mention, the way this song is going so far, and with the style of it, I think Sam Hall would be a fitting tune for it. Anyone else?

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Jim Lad
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 05:33 PM

Look what they done to my song, Ma.

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Jim Lad
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 05:40 PM

It barely seems like yesterday
You held me by the hand
We walked along the seashore
kicked our shoes off in the sand
Then up along the riverbank
and to the shady glen
I'd part with all I own
Just to have yesterday again.


Something like that....

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: skipy
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 05:53 PM

Maybe, just maybe, this may be important to someone, maybe to help someone reconcile a recent or even long past event, perhaps we should be gentle here & try to write something worth singing.
Or pehaps I may be wrong, as I am often and able to admit it!
Skipy

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Jim Lad
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 05:56 PM

Maybe!

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: GUEST
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 05:58 PM

CANCER SUX

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Dave Wynn
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 05:59 PM

"The dog rose curled around your grave"
"the blossom white and orange"......oh bugger

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Jim Lad
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 06:03 PM

It barely seems like yesterday
You held me by the hand
We walked along the seashore
kicked our shoes off in the sand
Then up along the riverbank
and to the shady glen
I'd part with all I own
Just to have yesterday again.

Ah but that was in the springtime
When the air was fresh and clear
We never had a worry
Never shed a single tear
But now my heart grows heavy
As I ponder back to then
Won't somebody please show me
The way to yesterday again



Okay! I'm into it now....

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Rasener
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 06:06 PM

Good LOL

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: LukeKellylives (Chris)
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 06:08 PM

Yeah, scratch my line. It's too long. I'm really thinkin' it should be sung like Sam Hall, still, but it's your song. *shrug*

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Jim Lad
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 06:15 PM

It barely seems like yesterday
You held me by the hand
We walked along the seashore
kicked our shoes off in the sand
Then up along the riverbank
and to the shady glen
I'd part with all I own
Just to have yesterday again.

Ah but that was in the springtime
When the air was fresh and clear
We never had a worry
Never shed a single tear
But now my heart grows heavy
As I ponder back to then
Won't somebody please show me
The way to yesterday again

Well the summers nearly over
And the nights are closing in
The sparrow long since left her nest
The geese are on the wing
And all the joys we ever had
We'll never share again
But please God above can I
Just have one yesterday again


needs work...

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Rasener
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 06:16 PM

Your Song as by Elton John :-)

Keep it going Jim Lad

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Jeri
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 06:28 PM

Jim it's hard to write anything serious as a group because everyone wants to contribute, even if they don't have anything to contribute but throwaway garbage they don't have to put any thought into. At least it's helpful that they self-identify.

Now there are photographs
And a memory, as I turn the page
You're beautiful and perfect
For never will you age
And these thoughts light my heart
Like the stars the heavens above
Everything in this world dies
Everything, but love

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 06:46 PM

And when I think of you my love,
My heart leaps in my breast.
My memory of your beauty, of
the one I loved the best.
And when the Winter comes once more,
And I sit by our log fire,
I'll think of you with a passion,
You are still my hearts desire.

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: Jim Lad
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 06:48 PM

It barely seems like yesterday
You held me by the hand
We walked along the seashore
kicked our shoes off in the sand
Then up along the riverbank
and to the shady glen
I'd part with all I own
Just to have yesterday again.

Ah but that was in the springtime
When the air was fresh and clear
We never had a worry
Never shed a single tear
But now my heart grows heavy
As I ponder back to then
Won't somebody please show me
The way to yesterday again

Well the summers nearly over
And the nights are closing in
The sparrow long since left her nest
The geese are on the wing
And all the joys we ever had
We'll never share again
But please God above can I
Just have one yesterday again

So now my love, I'll say Goodbye
As you go on your way
And know my heart is aching
Just to make it through the day
And though we may be parted
Darling in my heart I pray
That someday we'll be together,
Love, just like .....


jeeze, I can't think of the last word. Let me see. Rhymes with "Heart I pray" .... any takers?
And all done before the wee one wakes up from her nap!

Subject: RE: Let's write a song together!
From: LukeKellylives (Chris)
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 06:51 PM

We could do the ultimate cliche and finish it with "Love, just like a morning in May."