Bull, Barton, Beds - September things

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 15 Sep 06 - 07:16 AM

I went down the paper shop

But it had blown away

What's the difference between illegal and unlawful

Ones a sick bird

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: The PA
Date: 15 Sep 06 - 07:24 AM

A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."

A jump-lead walks into a bar. The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 15 Sep 06 - 10:34 AM

Cheers PA

You've kept me going today - the laughs and all

Have a good weekend

and the same to everyone

Chris Flegg Sunday at the Comfort Hotel - 17th

and special guest at the Bull folk session next Wednesday - 20th

Singaround etc at the Bucks Head, Little Wymondley next Monday - 18th

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 17 Sep 06 - 08:01 AM

Here's a note from Mike Blair concerning Bedford Folk Club

Now at Daley's Club, on Bedford Road opposite Addison Park in Kempston

Dear All,
Just a reminder that we have our first concert night at the new venue this Thursday, 21st September.
Our first 2 singers' nights have been fine, and those who have joined us have thoroughly approved the new room. I would like an even better turnout on our first concert, particularly as it is very comfortable and spacious, with a proper performance area.
Steve and Kristi are very good performers and songwriters in the mould of Tom Paxton and Gordon Lightfoot - they call it Americana, but I just think of it as American folk.
Anyway, they are from Tacoma, Washington State, and I think you will enjoy them.
By the way, our first meeting when we revert to Wednesdays is on October 4th.
Any problems with maps or anything else, get in touch by phone or e-mail.
Hope to see you all on Thursday,
Mike

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: The Unicorn Man
Date: 17 Sep 06 - 03:06 PM

Oh dear he does not want to tell this lot he is changing to a Wednesday. Sacralage. If that is how you spell it. PS when is the Bedfordshire day of song Dude?

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: The PA
Date: 18 Sep 06 - 04:11 AM

Good morning Ross and all, greetings from sunny Worcestershire. I've had a wonderful start to the day, however my husband has not. Not only is he stuck in the worlds biggest traffic jam on the M6 north, (well maybe not quite the worlds biggest) but he has also go off this morning wearing our sons school trousers! Now, does this mean I have a rather slim youthfull kind of husband or a rather oversized 16 year old son!
Hope you all had a super fun packed weekend which with any luck will continue through the week. No jokes from the boss yet but I'm sure it wont be too long.

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: breezy
Date: 18 Sep 06 - 04:55 AM

Morning Ross

Many thanks for your support last night, sorry i overlooked Fleggy's visit to you this coming wednesday, hope you will be well supported.

i think his environ mental song is one of his best, 'Fairest Flower' I believe its called

N/w promises to be a stunner with Anthony John Clake dispite the fact that his arrangement of Fleggy's song maybe rather 'alternative'

all the best

and to the treader of grapes

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 18 Sep 06 - 06:08 AM

Hi all - very nice weekend thanks - topped off by Mr Breeze's excellent hospitality - cheers JB - I'll try and get over to see you again soon

Hi MD - BEDFORDSHIRE DAY OF SONG & TUNES IS SATURDAY THE 11TH NOVEMBER - 12 MIDDAY TO 12 MIDNIGHT - It should be in Unicorn - small ad & chatterbox

Morning PA - what a start - when did he find out? - when he pulled the catapult out of his back pocket

The weekend was excellent - I went to see a play Saturday night called Dealers Choice - very good

To early for any jokes - I fatally injured myself last week by walking into a overflow pipe sticking out of a brick wall - my IQ level has sunk since the last hair cut

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: GUEST,Manager, Nuits St Albans
Date: 18 Sep 06 - 08:04 AM

Has one of my treaders been absconding windward?

I heard it on the grapevine.

la la la la la

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: breezy
Date: 18 Sep 06 - 08:50 AM

they wus keeping tabs on the real folk scene to bring it back to the mission

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 18 Sep 06 - 10:50 AM

Not sure what that's all about - wot grapes/wot treaders etc

I'm going to Alan Hewson's do tonight:

On Monday 18th there is a monthly free open session at The Bucks' Head, Stevenage Rd, Little Wymondly, it starts around 8.30.

It's been going three months and I haven't made it yet

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: breezy
Date: 18 Sep 06 - 12:19 PM

wish Alan all the best for the forthcoming autumn.

report back tomorrow in detail please

cathy was exposing her toeses

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Cathie
Date: 18 Sep 06 - 06:30 PM

Ross should provide detail (he pays better attention than me), but the Bucks Head was vibrant. I am sure I was flashed going in the carpark. Shirley I wasn't travelling too fast again.

And so nearby for me. I actually got home before my family locked the back door on me.

No difference in the state of the kitchen though. Ho hum.

moanie minnie

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 19 Sep 06 - 05:01 AM

Hi all - here's my report from Little Wymondley

After spending ten minutes trying to park (this is good I thought -loads of people), I finally entered the large but rather cluttered pub
It's one of those pubs where the bar seems to dominate the whole building and everyone's left to sit in the coridors

Sure enought the folk singers where huddled in a pack - Alan, Sue and three other blokes, 2 No. with guitars and a piper + a rockabilly type group comprising double bass and guitars (a wop bang a whoppa me do la la etc)

It was a splendid evening of song however and the regulars seemed to enjoy the music - plates of food arrived from the landlord and everyone was recording on digital cameas and laptops

The pubs music license doesn't allow windows and doors to be open so it was a bit hot

Cathy sat in an armchair in the corner like old ma and talked about the good old days when you could leave your back door open, make cakes from powdered egg and hit your children with a bucket

I celebrated the end of the evening by throwing my empty glass at the fruit machine (I'm getting worse)

The car park was empty as I left - the stars shone and life continued unabashed under the milky way

In the distance I could see flashes of blue on the skyline as Cathy set off every speed camera on her way back to Stevenage

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Scrump
Date: 19 Sep 06 - 05:32 AM

Hi Ross, I was one of the 2 blokes with guitars! Alan pointed you out to me and I meant to introduce myself, but you seemed to have b*gg*red off by the time I got round to it.

Last night's session was not typical - the rockabilly type group had spoken to Alan and he had tried to explain what a session was, but in the end he agreed to give them a half-hour slot. Nevertheless they went down well* (I admit I quite enjoyed them myself) - a bit of fun, but didn't leave as much time for proper folk!

* well they would do, most of the crowd were their mates/relatives/ fan club, from what I could tell.

(Piper? I think you mean flute/whistle! :-))

Yes, it was too hot (and smoky) in there for my liking. It's also a bit noisy in there, with a lot of cross-talk from the other bar. The closed doors/windows thing seems odd, given that the last session was outdoors in the garden. It seems OK to make noise in the open air but not to allow noise to 'escape' from indoors. I never will understand these daft licencing laws :(

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Cathie
Date: 19 Sep 06 - 07:38 AM

What a report!

Scrump - Now a face to the name and comment about builders' bums last month! That's another mystery solved. Hello.

Maybe we will see you at Barton one day - 15.75 minutes Little Wymondley to The Bull is my record so far. No speed cameras en route.

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 19 Sep 06 - 08:03 AM

Hi Scrump - nice to meet you - sorry I fled so quickly and didn't get a chance to talk to you - the way we were sitting made it hard to mingle - I wanted to get home early as I was tired

Which bloke with guitar were you - I think you were the six string player or were you the 12 string player

I enjoyed the session a lot and the pub - it was alive - the rockabilly was good fun - it's not everyday you hear a double bass and the young singer who reeled off song after song without missing a word and playing every blues fill trick you could imagine; was inspiring

Sorry about the piper - my folk technology is a bit rubbish at times

I think a traditional song is 'The green green grass of home'

You are very, very welcome to come along to Barton should Baldock allow - we are a friendly bunch with all over tans and we have grape treading facilities

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Scrump
Date: 19 Sep 06 - 08:09 AM

Hi Cathie

(Ooerr! I don't remember what I said about builders' bums last month - I just hope it wasn't too rude though) ;-)

Sorry I didn't get a chance to talk to you or Ross. For avoidance of doubt I was the bloke sitting next to Alan, singing the odd song (very odd, sometimes) and and occasionally accompanying him (a tough job but someone has to do it!) ;-)

(I'd like to try to get down to Barton one of these days, but unfortunately I'm usually busy on Weds - 'tis a popular night, folk-wise.)

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 19 Sep 06 - 08:49 AM

Cheers Scrump - no problem - I thought the band around Alan sounded very good - is that the new Tam Lin line up?

On Wednesday we have Chris Flegg doing a guest spot at the Bull from 9 to 9:30ish

Chris will be appearing on Three Counties Radio Wednesday afternoon from 2pm talking about his new CD and how wonderful the Bull Folk Club is (really)

I know it's not what the singaround's about, but Chris has been a great supporter of our charity events and I think he deserves our support - he is also an inspiration to us all

Usual singalong chaos will apply and I'll try to get there 8:15 and kick off the night with the Planet Suite by Gustav Holst, on my drum

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Scrump
Date: 19 Sep 06 - 09:37 AM

Yes, that was almost but not quite the full line-up - our other fiddler was absent (I won't say where to save her the embarrassment!) ;-)

Just seen your previous posting Ross, for some reason it appeared later on my server than Cathie's even though posted earlier. Yes, you're right, I was the 6-string player. (The guy with the 12-string was from Stevenage, but I never found out his name.)

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: breezy
Date: 19 Sep 06 - 03:14 PM

thanks for the info on the time for Fleggy on 3 counties

His song 'The Mermaid of Zennor' should appeal to the Cornish element, this is close to being a folk ballad

'The Fairest Flower' is most topical regarding environmental issues

The opener 'Commutor Breakdown Blues' works well particularly
'give up trains and buy a scooter blues' I think the line goes.

'Charles and Diana - on a porcelain plate'

Some very simple and effective lines

If you havent seen him then you could be pleasantly surprised.

Good luck on Wednesday, buy one as a present to a friend.

'My Sweet Lady' is a also worth adding with his 'Hill So High' award winning song that has permeated into festival singarounds recently

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Cathie
Date: 19 Sep 06 - 04:09 PM

Planet Suite eh?

Musical Voices Enjoy Mayhem - Just Sing Us Naughty Poems

What's your line?

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 20 Sep 06 - 03:52 AM

Today I will mostly be a Quantity Surveyor

I am looking forward very much to seeing & hearing Chris Flegg tonight

To all our silent readers - go wild and say something

You are very, very, very, very welcome

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: The PA
Date: 20 Sep 06 - 03:59 AM

Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny?"

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 20 Sep 06 - 07:11 AM

ha, ha - did they eat the funny bone

DO vegetarian cannibals eat scarecrows

Dentists are tooth filling

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: The PA
Date: 20 Sep 06 - 07:47 AM

Noooo stop it, you're worse than me. If you're mostly a QS today what are you when you're not?

A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, "My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him? "Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him" So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says "I'm going to have to put him down." "What? Because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy"

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 20 Sep 06 - 08:13 AM

Well tonight I will be mostly a crumbly old folk singer with dishevelled straw filled hair and badly dented guitar

I like dogs, but I couldn't eat a whole one

I see they have crossed a labrador and poodle to get a labradoodle

Will they cross it with a cockerel to get a labradoodle do

Cannibals won't eat folk singers - they're too disagreable

Don't forget CHRIS on 3 counties radio show; that starts 2pm

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: The PA
Date: 20 Sep 06 - 08:31 AM

That last really bad joke was sent to me from my pal Lucy who's actually a vet. She is scared stiff of spiders and hates budgies. Most small animals (mice hamsters etc) drop dead from shock when she touches them. She has a wonderful trick for restraining vicious dogs when you have to inject them, you trap their head in the surgery door. She assures me that its OK to do that as long as you remember not to slam the door. And I let her mess with me 'oss's!!

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: GUEST,Hitchin John
Date: 20 Sep 06 - 09:15 AM

Today I am contemplating redundancy and unfair dismissal.

Not too much of a laugh, except so far they have told two people they are redundant and then had to beg them to stay. Bunch of muppets - can't consult and can't count.

They are still waiting for one guy to reply - he's gone on holiday for two weeks

Should see be there tonight.

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 20 Sep 06 - 09:23 AM

Oh - very sorry to hear that John - we'll cheer you up tonight

CHRIS IS ON THE 3 counties RADIO NOW

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: The PA
Date: 20 Sep 06 - 10:40 AM

No, redundance is no laughing matter, we know from first hand experience and its no picnic for those handing out the bad news either. Then some clown tells you there's loads of jobs out there - yeh right, not if you're over 50 there aint!

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: The PA
Date: 20 Sep 06 - 11:25 AM

And I cant resist sharing this :

David Beckham decides to go horse riding.
although he has had no previous experience he skilfully mounts the horse and appears in complete command of the situation as the horse gallops along at a steady pace.
Victoria admiringly watches her husband. After a short time David becomes a little casual and he begins to lose his grip in the saddle, he panics and grabs the horse around the neck shouting for it to stop.
Victoria starts to scream and shout for someone to help her husband as David has by this time slipped completely out of the saddle and is only saved from hitting the ground by the fact that he still has a grip on the horses neck. David decides that his best chance is to leap away from the horse, but his foot has become entangled in one of the stirrups. As the horse gallops along David's head is banging on the ground and he is slipping into unconsciousness.

Victoria is now frantic and screams and screams for help!!!!

Hearing her screams, the Tesco's Security Guard comes out of the store and unplugs the horse!

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: The Unicorn Man
Date: 20 Sep 06 - 12:57 PM

The Unicorns are ready. Will see you tonight. FCY

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 21 Sep 06 - 03:45 AM

Cheers Unicorn man - it was nice to see you - have you had your hair done a different way

Many thanks to Chris Flegg for a storming set - it was nice to hear and see you - good luck with the CD

Also thanks to Derek, Yvonne, Rita, Tony, Chris, Jane, Geoff, Davinia, Nat, Lorna, Hitchin John, Trevor W, Jeff, Bill, Martin, Bob, Teresa, Keith, Eve, Roy, Geoff (accord) & wife) and marvelous Cathy

Very good PA - didn't DB finish a jigsaw puzzle in a week and then phone the papers because it said 4-5 years on the box

I'm in Bletchley today, it's sunny and I'm in a windowless office measuring an extension, 16 deer have been flattened in Woburn Safari Park - they have a scoreboard at the entry gate & it lights up at night

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: The PA
Date: 21 Sep 06 - 04:44 AM

Code breaking eh! Sorry dont get the Woburn thing???? is that serious or am I having a girlie moment !!

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 21 Sep 06 - 05:27 AM

Sorry, on the way to work in Bletchley, I drive through the Woburn Estate
It's quite pleasant and there are normally herds of deer sweeping majestically across the grasslands
Unfortunately, they are always crossing the road and hence the flattening part
To calm us motorists, they have put up signs on the entry to tell us the score
and as a useful guide, they give us last years total too
14 were bumped off last year; so 16 so far up to September is not good news

Dear, deer - one might say

Almost leads me to say what do you call a blind stag?

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: The PA
Date: 21 Sep 06 - 05:35 AM

Oh I get it! How exotic.

No eye-deer!!!!

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Scrump
Date: 21 Sep 06 - 06:00 AM

Sounds ideal for a folk club BBQ. Venison burgers - delicious ;-)

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: The PA
Date: 21 Sep 06 - 06:04 AM

Oh No! How could you, think of Bambi!!!!!!!

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 21 Sep 06 - 06:26 AM

How about a blind stag, with no legs?

(probably eaten by Scrump)

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: The PA
Date: 21 Sep 06 - 06:48 AM

No sorry got me there, dear!

re scrump, the blind stag didn't see him coming !

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 21 Sep 06 - 06:59 AM

Blind stag with no legs

still, no eyed deer - cor blimey - ya can't get the staff

The peanuts on bars in pubs are always speaking to me and saying nice things

Evidently, they're complimentary nuts

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: GUEST,Hitchin John
Date: 21 Sep 06 - 07:10 AM

Are there no good jokes left in the world.

I need cheering up while composing my appeal against selection for redundancy.

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: The PA
Date: 21 Sep 06 - 07:10 AM

That is so bad!!!! I shall take my revenge when I return from the pub.
(Thats how I know its Thursday)
In the meantime, what do you call a deaf alsation?

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 21 Sep 06 - 07:24 AM

Anything you like - he won't be able to hear you

or Herr Ingaid

or a German stopheard

Lucky you - pub - all I got was a banana and a peach yoghurt

Sorry JP - give em hell

Sing that song by the strawbs - you can't get me I'm part of the Union

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: The PA
Date: 21 Sep 06 - 09:04 AM

Oooo err technical hitch, had to do some work. Ye Gods, you can see my jokes from there!
Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with nuts & hundreds and thousands. Police say that he topped himself.
Back to work, boss off to Argentina this afternoon for a week on business. Get the work done now, feet up next week!

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 21 Sep 06 - 12:08 PM

Hi PA - same problem - overworked & underfed

I'm offline tomorrow

See you all Monday

Probably a relief after the standard of jokes today

You've all done very well

(thankyou Mr Grace)

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: The Unicorn Man
Date: 21 Sep 06 - 04:05 PM

Just thought. Where's Bert?

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Scrump
Date: 22 Sep 06 - 05:03 AM

Are there no good jokes left in the world.

There are plenty of good jokes left in the world, it's just that like many of us they're old now.

Subject: RE: Bull, Barton, Beds - September things
From: Ross
Date: 25 Sep 06 - 05:49 AM

Hi all and welcome to Monday

I had a very nice weekend - went to see an Ayckbourn play on Saturday and joined in Keith's have a go open mic last night at the Chequers in Streatley - I sang some Beatles

Friday, I had my car in the garage so I cycled from Arlesey to Barton (crikey - I was rusty)

Bert is moving house so he is under pressure - MR Unicorn man

Folk news - Blue Anchor monthly sessions will now recommence at the KING HARRY, King Harry Lane, ST ALBANS on Tuesday October 3rd

It's open mayhem at Barton this Wednesday - all welcome