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BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!!
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BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: Bobert Date: 06 Dec 07 - 06:54 PM Sheet fire, boys!!! No wondee that WGSR ain't quite come up with the schamatic situation with the womens... The danged thing was invented by Edith Ethel Frazier... Them Fraziers ain't right... None of 'um... 'Specially the Frazier women... My cousin Rufue married a Timpkins gal from round them parts but her mama was a Frazier... Mean as cat Sh*t that woman was... She was so mean that one day a freight train was headin' into town, took one look at that woman, jumped track and took a dirt road... Sho nuff did... That woman was mean... I believe that I nedd to get the WGSR exhortized to get them evil Frazier spirits outta it... Sho nuff... Hey, remember them Frazier cars??? You know why they ain't 'round any more don't ya... I mean, other than bein' butt uglee... Well, them cars got posessed just like my slide rule by Edith Ethel... Tell, ya' what, Janie... Next time you talk to her you tell her that we is kin... Kinda... That oughtta sweeten the ol' gal up, evenm if she is dead.... (Nah, Bobert... She is a Frazier, you know...) Might of fact, don't say nuthin' to her at all... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: Janie Date: 07 Dec 07 - 12:34 AM Can you say Edith Ethel three times, really fast? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: Bobert Date: 07 Dec 07 - 09:03 AM Edith Ethel, Edith Ethonol, Elect Elenor... Don't mess with me... Me and Al Gore invented talk... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: Janie Date: 07 Dec 07 - 02:21 PM Good thing she didn't marry an Edison. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: Tweed Date: 08 Dec 07 - 02:58 AM O lord....they is two of 'em now... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: Helen Date: 08 Dec 07 - 03:29 PM John on the Sunset Coast, Of course Bobert's "woman" has a sense of humour. She's married to him isn't she? That's funny enough! Eh, Bobert, isn't that right? :-) And Bonecruncher, them's the rules all right! And this useful info was sent to me in an email this week. Very relevant to this discussion, I think. Nine words women use... 1.) Fine : This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up. 2.) Five Minutes : If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house. 3.) Nothing : This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine. 4.) Go Ahead : This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It! 5.) Loud Sigh : This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.) 6.) That's Okay : This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake. 7.) Thanks : A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say you're welcome. 8.) Whatever : Is a women's way of saying @#$% YOU! 9.) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to #3. Helen |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: Bobert Date: 08 Dec 07 - 05:14 PM Thank you, Helen... I will print this off and tape it to my bathroom mirror and memorize it backwards and forwards... I mighjt turn it into a song to help... I've also given a copy to the WGSR... Maybe it will help in his final diagnosis... Maybe not... Oh, and for the record, the P-Vine has a sense of humor but she is also of the woman race and therefore a friggin' luney but, hey, I loves her... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: Desert Dancer Date: 09 Dec 07 - 02:28 PM Helen, you are a traitor to your sex. ~ Becky in Tucson |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: GUEST,Bill the sound Date: 09 Dec 07 - 07:14 PM Can you still get those slide rules? I found one in the back of a cupboard. Alas I've forgotten how to use it. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: Bobert Date: 09 Dec 07 - 08:27 PM Ummmm< you ain't got one of them battery operated one's do ya, BtheS??? If so, throw the sumabich out... And if yers ain't wood, throw it out... Wood gets the job done... The WGSR don't like me messin' with it at all... Okay, we sit down for an occasional talk but then it jus' does it's thing... You know, like figurating the wirin' problem in womenz... Okay, it ain't fool proof... It once told me that if I wne to the North Pole and just ealked 'round it counterclockwise that fir revolution 'round the pole I'd be a day younger'... But, what the heck... I saved up all year and went on up there and walked round that sumabich 'nuff to have taken off at least 20 years... Wore my poor ol' hillbilly out, it did... Tood a couple weeks to recover and after everything was said and done I felt a couple years olders... But other than that and the 200 election, the WGSR has been purdy much reliable... And, between you and me, I think the WGSR got the 2000 election right... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: astro Date: 10 Dec 07 - 05:00 PM Now, is this slide rule one of those straight ones or is it one of those fancy ones that are round? Philosophically speaking, what if it's round or straight? What does it mean? Astro |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: Amos Date: 10 Dec 07 - 05:09 PM IF its round, it is not a slide rule but a Tuit. For those tasks you mean to get to when you get a round Tuit. A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: Bobert Date: 10 Dec 07 - 05:26 PM Well, at one time it was straight as a string but with age and all it's got a little bow to it... Hmmmmmm, seems I do too but makes it easier to walk under tree limbs... Ain't affected either of our thinkin' abilities, though... ...yet... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: astro Date: 10 Dec 07 - 05:39 PM I know that tuit thingy and I know that bent angle thingy too...but, many times gettin tuit and gettin bent conflicts and then what do ya do... astro |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: GUEST,leeneia Date: 11 Dec 07 - 02:33 AM See if this link works http://www.fotosearch.com/DGT071/cb023557/ The West Virginia Slide Rule is the brown thing, not the green thing. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: Amos Date: 11 Dec 07 - 06:03 PM Bobert, the ancients worked this out long ago, and left this cautionary tale to explain the mystery of it all: Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him but was moved by Arthur's youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer and, if after a year, he still had no answer, he would be put to death. The question?....What do women really want? Such a question would perplex even the most knowledgeable man, and to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query. But, since it was better than death, he accepted the monarch's proposition to have an answer by year's end. He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everyone: the princess, the priests, the wise men and even the court jester. He spoke with everyone, but no one could give him a satisfactory answer. Many people advised him to consult the old witch, for only she would have the answer. But the price would be high; as the witch was famous throughout the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged. The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no choice but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer the question, but he would have to agree to her price first. The old witch wanted to marry Sir Lancelot, the most noble of the Knights of the Round Table and Arthur's closest friend! Young Arthur was horrified. She was hunchbacked and hideous, had only one tooth, smelled like sewage, made obscene noises, et c. He had never encountered such a repugnant creature in all his life. He refused to force his friend to marry her and endure such a terrible burden; but Lancelot, learning of the proposal, spoke with Arthur. He said nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to Arthur's life and the preservation of the Round Table. Hence, a wedding was proclaimed and the witch answered Arthur's question thus: What a woman really wants, she answered....is to be in charge of her own life. Everyone in the kingdom instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth and that Arthur's life would be spared. And so it was, the neighboring monarch granted Arthur his freedom and Lancelot and the witch had a wonderful wedding. The honeymoon hour approached and Lancelot, steeling himself for a horrific experience, entered the bedroom. But, what a sight awaited him. The most beautiful woman he had ever seen lay before him on the bed. The astounded Lancelot asked what had happened The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her when she appeared as a witch, she would henceforth, be her horrible deformed self only half the time and the beautiful maiden the other half. Which would he prefer? Beautiful during the day....or night? Lancelot pondered the predicament. During the day, a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but at night, in the privacy of his castle, an old witch? Or, would he prefer having a hideous witch during the day, but by night, a beautiful woman for him to enjoy wondrous intimate moments? What would YOU do? What Lancelot chose is below. BUT....make YOUR choice before you scroll down below. OKAY? Noble Lancelot said that he would allow HER to make the choice herself. Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the time because he had respected her enough to let her be in charge of her own life. Now ...what is the moral to this story? Scroll down The moral is..... If you don't let a woman have her own way.... Things are going to get ugly Ponder this, and sin no more. A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: Bobert Date: 11 Dec 07 - 07:58 PM LOL, Amos.... Actually, I think there's a little witch in every womenz... But then there's a little beer-drenkin'-carburator-rebuildin'-dumbassin' in every man... BTW, the WGSR ain't awayed and is still on the case... As fir letting womenz be themselves??? Try stoppin' 'um!!! Yeah, I think all men eveentually learn this... Okay, there are exceptions but I can't think of any right off the bat.... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: GUEST,HughM Date: 12 Dec 07 - 08:11 AM The strange thing is that women are very often right about things they know nothing about, including carburettors! And another thing puzzles me: they never look where they're going in supermarkets and yet their trolleys never collide! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Wes Ginny Slide Rule Breakthrough!!! From: Amos Date: 12 Dec 07 - 09:59 AM Woemen are "tuned" from birth to know where each other is at all times in all dimensions, so that they can stay current with the current configuration of the sisterhood. THis is what they do best -- make the network, run the network, and work out where the network should go next. THey occasionally employ men to assist in the heavier-lifting aspects, but it is their radar that does all the traffic control. They not only keep shopping carts from colliding, they usually keep states-of-mind from colliding!! A |
