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Mudcat religion
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: The Shambles Date: 06 Jul 99 - 05:41 AM SeanM Can we have more predicitions, gifted one? For you indeed have the sight. |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: SeanM Date: 06 Jul 99 - 02:36 AM Can I be the young upstart agitator? I don't have access to a printing press to list any articles, but I DO have Microsoft Word... But where would I post them? And how would the offshoot run? Would we just start our own threads and cyberglower at outsiders? NOI to all the Lutherans (or anyotherans) out there... Last Prophet of the Unprofitable Commute, Patron Saint of the 500 mile drive to rehearse, M |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: Craig Date: 06 Jul 99 - 02:26 AM BSeed, I wish to be an acolyte. I'm used to carrying around old relic bones. (My own.) I think we could use old tiples for the bonfires at the worship services. Any ideas on what we can use for incense? Craig. |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: bseed(charleskratz) Date: 06 Jul 99 - 12:00 AM And AlistairUK, as well? And Northfolk? And whom else are we missing lately? --seed (I had to think a while about the m in whom--the word is in the subject position, but the real subject is we; whom is the direct object of the present progressive verb are missing (a brief bit of holy pedagogy). |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: Alice Date: 05 Jul 99 - 11:49 PM bbc, tell your son I am a long time Mudcatter and a longer-time cult watcher. I have had to help people who were abused (and their children abused and neglected) in destructive cults. The word cult is a loaded term, because it does have many meanings. There are groups the fit my definition of 'destructive cult' that use deception to get people involved, manipulation to change their behavior, and a form of control that causes members to monitor their own thoughts to keep themselves aligned with their new beliefs, no matter what happens. Eventually people fear leaving the group more than they fear the bad things that happen to them in the group. I have had the unfortunate experience of having to deal with these types of people and groups, because a new-age apocalyptic cult, complete with a 'messenger from God', illegal fire arms, and fall out shelters they went into because their leader told them it was the end of the world. Here is my page on cults with linked pages of my comments and info. click here Here is the site that deals with exposing the cult that moved from California to Southwest Montana. (Loonies keep thinking they can 'hide' in Montana. duh, wrong) click Click on Interesting Things and read 'Purely For Prophet'.
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: katlaughing Date: 05 Jul 99 - 11:33 PM Wow! Thanks, BillD. I missed the first post re' virgins. I understand the context of your posting better now. Also, appreciate your comments about privacy regarding some postings. Sorry, Barbara if I came off too serious and judgemental. Glad to hear the kid is "jist jealous" of mom's on-line time.**BG** It stayed in the seventies, here, today. really nice, but of course it just did that because it was in the 90's yesterday and Rog bought me a swamp cooler and put it in, so now we don't need it, BUT we will, I KNOW! Which reminds me....anybody heard from Frank in the Swamps, lately? All Good Wishes, katlaughing |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: bbc Date: 05 Jul 99 - 11:15 PM Shambles, I had a problem w/ that word "exclusive," too. Let's do a little creative dictionary editing & change it to "inclusive" & you've got Mudcat. kat, Usually when David calls "cult," he's teasing me for spending (from his perspective) too much time 'catting. Duane & I had a good time away today--much cooler in the lake than the un-air-conditioned house (100 degrees in NY today!). Arrived home feeling somewhat more mellow. Read all of your posts. Some are clever; some are funny; some we'll just accept, anyway. best, bbc & Duane D. |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: Bill D Date: 05 Jul 99 - 10:53 PM kat..*shaking my head*..actually, I was trying to 'tone down' the virgin remarks with the cartoon references...guess I was too oblique...I do think that some remarks are best left to private wisecracks and not to public chats...ok, guys? 'nuff said? |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: bseed(charleskratz) Date: 05 Jul 99 - 08:42 PM If anyonw has need of a holy relic, I have an endless supply of insignificant scraps of paper (in every color but green). --seed |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: Banjer Date: 05 Jul 99 - 08:35 PM Wasn't feeling too hot last night, (the 4th) so went to bed about ten minutes before this thread started. Got home tonight to read it and I gotta say "I stand in awe at the Holy Altar of the Mudcat". Never in all my put togethers, and I've been to two county fairs and a asskickin' contest, have I ever seen such a group! I LOVE it! I'm gonna go get my Unholy Instrument and play us a song. |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: Pete Peterson Date: 05 Jul 99 - 07:38 PM I was trying to find L. Sprague De Camp's definition of a cult and couldn't so have to rely on the (overdrawn) memory banks-- when a person joins and becomes deeply involved in a religion other than the one practiced by his family of origin, he is said to have joined a CULT, but a good Catholic (for instance) who is called to become a priest is not thought to have done anything strange. Food for thought, which reminds me that I'm hungry. Yes, maybe I have joined a cult since learning of Mudcat, and one of its characteristics is that I want to convert all my friends! And we care about each other-- will never forget some of the threads concerning Catspaw 'bout a month ago and found myself singing the Stanley Bros. "who will sing for me?" Glad it was not necessary. love PETE |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: LEJ Date: 05 Jul 99 - 07:04 PM Gather round, Pilgrims and don't be shy. Crowd on up to the table and feast yer eyes on some of the finest Holy Relics ye'll find on any internet site. And I'm not talking coffee table conversation-pieces or paperweights here. Each of these items is possessed of properties both sublime and magical, having the power to make the lame walk, the barren fertile, and the shy the life o' the party. Now ye take this elegantly bound volume, why it's no ordinary book- this be the Sacred HTML Guidebook of Mystical Offer! Yea, friends the very one used by Cardinal Offer to Correct the Threads, and banish the evildoers to The Christian Deer-Hunters Page! And this, the legendary Condom of Power, once used by Arthur himself to suddue the Seven Wicked Wenches. Or this seemingly insignificant scrap of paper- actually the Poetic License of Saint Seed the Thread-Slayer! Enables the bearer to make unlimited outlandish analogies in the face of enmity! Gaze on this, the F7 key from the keyboard of Exalted Max the Mudcreator, he who saw the void, and formed out of it the Mudcat! Or if you favor the Dark Powers, this vial of Gargoyle's Breath, which can be used as the antidote to the Curse of Dull Postings, or as a Flame Potion against your enemies! And so much more: Banjer's Unholy Instrument, the Sacred EarthShoes of Katlaughing, St Peter T's Sword of Irony, the Torch of Big Mick (to be carried in cases of unrequited love), the Last Post of AlistairUK,a flagon of Tears of Laughter from Alice in Montana, and this scratchy 78 rpm version of Larry LaPrise performing the Hoky Poky Ritual in Sandy Payton's basement in 1966. Yes, we accept Visa and Mastercharge. Sorry, no out-of-state checks. |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: John in Brisbane Date: 05 Jul 99 - 07:00 PM I have just copyrighted the first hymn, and will be selling hymnals to all of the faithful, a mere $19.95 each, Ownership of a hymnal is compulsory.
In terms of vestments I now have a great line of Mudcat Holy Shrewd T shirts, woven by vestal virgins, and you guessed it, these too are compulsory garments when attending a cyber service.
Anyone interested in a franchise in this entry level investment, please email me at johninbrisbane@churrchoftheholymudcat.com.
Regards
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: The Shambles Date: 05 Jul 99 - 06:13 PM Great tidings!! We have found our prophet!! SeanM.Well we are all still here
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: katlaughing Date: 05 Jul 99 - 05:33 PM Hey, guys....I know I just said let's give it the light touch, but now I am going to be serious. Talking about using 2, 7, or 14 yrs old virgins, read out of context by any schmoe joe who happens in here, sounds like we are way too cultish, for my taste. Allow me to throw the politically correct and fully legal wet blanket on any of those comments, unless they are in a longer posting with tongue fully in cheek, pulleeezzzeee! katlaughingalbeituncomfortablyattheabovereferences |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: The Shambles Date: 05 Jul 99 - 04:50 PM The only word in the definition that I have trouble with is 'exclusive', but I am just being picky. Can I organise the trips to see the relics and sacred sites? |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: MudGuard Date: 05 Jul 99 - 04:43 PM Bill D, lets use two 7 year old virgins instead, or if we can't find those, seven two year old virgins... ;-) |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: Tony Burns Date: 05 Jul 99 - 04:27 PM Can I be the guy that sits quietly in a corner and smiles knowingly from time to time? |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: Bill D Date: 05 Jul 99 - 04:24 PM umm..seed....I have a cartoon from years ago...two Aztec priests..standing on the rim of a churning volcano...one is shrugging in frustration and saying..."but where are we going to FIND 14 year old virgins these days?!" Perhaps you need some alternate 'calling'? |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: katlaughing Date: 05 Jul 99 - 04:19 PM Well, if Harpgirl gets to be a High Priestess, that must mean I get to be the Mother Earth Superior, birkenstocks, cotton clothes and all. As such, of course, I shall supervise ALL fertility rites! Are you listening Mick? heeheehee. BBC: I see nothing wrong with the definition you quoted. I am very pleased to be part of "An exclusive group of persons sharing an esoteric, usually artistic or intellectual interest". I wish more people in the world would do so, whether here at the cat or elsewhere! I believe the term "cult" is much too subjective to be used as a catch-all phrase for what we have here. This is a community/global village. In genereal, no one is done harm here; everyone is respectful here; positive words, deeds, thoughts, and music are shared here. To me, a cult generally signifies a group of people who are "blind" followers of some megalomaniacal leader; basically brainwashed and misguided. This site is much too open and egalitarian for it to fall under that type of category. There is no coercion, are no needles, no dealers, no preachers who force any of us to be here, nor do we have to shave our heads, wear certain sneakers, give away all of our wordly possessions, wear any kind of robes, ar any of a myriad of other things which might smack of being cultish, not even dancing by the light of the moon! Perhaps it is youth and inexperience of life, in a broad sense, that contributes to your son's concern? I am sure he knows about your commitment to your personal beliefs and respects that. There are many of who were old enough to realize the awful news of Jim Jones and lethal kool-aid, as well as the terrible crimes committed by the Charles Manson cult. I do NOt believe the Mudcat comes anywhere near being lumped in the same category as those "cults". My dictionary also says cult can be defined as a "sect". a quick look at sect and I read, "a group of people having a common leadership, philosophy, etc.". By that definition, every city council, church, PTA group, union, etc, could be classified as such. I guess what I am saying in a belabouring sort of way is: we must be careful of the connotations of our words, when labeling especially. Lastly, I would like to say, I believe in trying to "walk in balance". That means having a sense of fun and good humour along with being serious when necessary. This thread is just another example of the completely free and open spirit of fun and humour that exists among a diverse and incredibly well-educated and well-spoken group of people it is my privelege to be a part of. In other words, while I respect your concern and applaud your courage in sharing with us, as well as your openness in discussing this with Duane and your son, I would suggest giving it the "Light Touch" and not taking it too seriously. With all good wishes, katlaughing
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: bseed(charleskratz) Date: 05 Jul 99 - 04:07 PM As the founder of the religion I get to choose my own position: venerable deflowerer of virgins. And Fadac and Gargoyle: Writers of the gospel. Great job, guys. And Catspaw and Fielding: Propagators of the faith (or consigliores, whatever). --seed |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: Big Mick Date: 05 Jul 99 - 03:22 PM Too late, Rick. LMAO. Mick |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: Rick Fielding Date: 05 Jul 99 - 02:35 PM I wouldn't want big Mick getting into any habits. |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: harpgirl Date: 05 Jul 99 - 01:35 PM ...since I don't qualify to be the VIRGIN SACRIFICE can I be a HIGH PRIESTESS? (can anyone stop me?) |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: Big Mick Date: 05 Jul 99 - 01:24 PM Can I be one of the Priests???? Come on guys, pulleaze???? How about keeper of the sacred fertility rites????? hahahahahahaha Mick |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: Bill D Date: 05 Jul 99 - 01:17 PM to gargoyle..yowsa! I believes! that is classic! to bbc and others who may be uncomfortable...NOTHING is this life can be fully appreciated if one cannot see the lighter side...I hope that everyone will keep in mind the distinction between parody and ridicule... to those who posssess the power..please bless my hard disk and modem and keep them safe from 'fatal errors' and "stack overflows"...I will sacrifice 12 AOL CDs at sunset..
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: bbc Date: 05 Jul 99 - 10:48 AM Thanks, catspaw. I will look forward to your personal email. Thanks for your word, too, Rick. I come from quite a traditional spiritual heritage & believe it deeply, but I feel as strongly that each must find his/her own way. Although I would be glad to discuss my beliefs w/ anyone, I would never try to *push* them on anyone. Belief must come from within. My first reaction to this thread was that it is, from my perspective, sacrilegious. At the same time, I assume that the intention is to just have some creative fun. This *is* an artistic community & I value that. To get some perspective, I've printed out the thread so far & Duane & I are going to take it w/ us today on our day trip to a resort in NJ & discuss it on the drive or as we lounge by the lake or in the hottub. catspaw, like you, I love the intelligence, kindness, & diversity I've found here. "Over the top" is ok! best to all, bbc |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: catspaw49 Date: 05 Jul 99 - 10:10 AM Hi Barb----thanks for the e-mail and I'll get back to you, I promise. For now, let me say this to David: Yes David, in a way your fears may be justified because in many respects Mudcat is a cult. But never in my experience have I been involved with a group of people that are so intelligent, articulate, introspective, compassionate, caring, and forgiving as the ones who inhabit this "village." And many times they're quite humorous too. There is a sarcastic, caustic, and yet self deprecating humor here that can seem offensive, but is truly harmless. One of my kids about your age made a joke about something the other day, but he didn't understand the words he was using. I called him on it and suggested that to be a smartass you have to be smart first. Maybe that was harsh, but here at the 'Cat, you find extrememly erudite and well educated (by whatever means) people. Most of us would tell you that out in the world where we spend our days, we tire of dealing with the lowest common denominator. Personally, around this place, I often think I am the lowest common denominator! One of our best citizens, Sandy Paton, once said he always wanted to live somewhere like this. THIS may be as close as any of us get to that kind of place. We poke a lot of fun at each other and at ourselves. We do it with a healthy respect for one another. Perhaps that is what this "cult" is really about......respect. Mutual respect. Almost every religion in the world teaches respect, but I've found that many don't practice what they preach. Most times at the 'Cat we do and we often agree to disagree. So don't worry about your Mom or Duane.......They are integral parts of our village, and your Mom is often a voice of sanity as I (and a few others) seem to go "over the top." Yeah, we're all addicted, but a healthier addiction I cannot imagine. catspaw |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: bbc Date: 05 Jul 99 - 08:44 AM I'm going to attempt a little reverse thread creep, from sublimely ludicrous to slightly more serious. What, after all, *is* a cult? And, is it possible to have a positive cult? When Mudcat is the 1st thing you check on waking, the last thing you check at night, & causes you to keep your Internet connection up all day when you're home (if you have flat-rate phone service!), so as to not miss late-breaking news, that is certainly starting to sound like addition, cult, whatever. I went to the several dictionaries I have at home & read until I found a definition that fit what I wanted to say--American Heritage, def. #6--"An exclusive group of persons sharing an esoteric, usually artistic or intellectual interest. What do you think? I still have some problems w/ this thread, but you guys go ahead & have your fun. There *is* room for all of us. love, bbc |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: Steve Parkes Date: 05 Jul 99 - 03:43 AM How did this thread get onto my personal page? Is somebody up there trying to tell me something? |
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Subject: Tune Add: YOU GOTTA HAVE HEART From: John in Brisbane Date: 05 Jul 99 - 03:32 AM If there is a hymn, and what a beauty it is, there must be music in the hymnal. Here goes:
Regards Timebase: 120 TimeSig: 4/4 24 8 This program is worth the effort of learning it. To download the March 10 MIDItext 98 software and get instructions on how to use it click here ABC format: X:1
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: The Shambles Date: 05 Jul 99 - 03:23 AM Great stuff. I'm still laughing as I write. For those who may be offended, I would suggest that nothing we could come up with here, could be as sur-real as some of the so called religions I see on US Cable TV. Remember that religions are man made, not made by God. |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: gargoyle Date: 05 Jul 99 - 03:00 AM Brothers and sisters, lend me yo' modems. Yo' taskbar is empty. You have downloaded the foul virus of Country and Western and called it Folk. Repent! Reformat! Reboot!
Lo, verily, I have walked through the circuit city of death. I have seen the Mudcat and know His URL. Yeah, his bandwidth is wide, and the entry to his dominion is not password-protected.
Do not allow yo' life to be downloaded into the HTML trash can. You can be saved. We can undelete and restore you to the thread of the chosen. Saint Joeseph shall protect thy head and pass upon thine own keyboard a blessing.
Greater love hath no man than this, that a man not stray from the path of the discussion and into thread-creep.
In my Father's PC are many threads: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go now to prepare a subfolder for you.
Verily, veriIy, I say unto thee, except a cookie be activated, you cannot access the domain of the privilaged.
Thou shalt direct link thy homepage to the Mud. Thou shalt not have any other website before the Mud.
Thou shalt not take the name of dick, Susan or Max in vain.
Remember the update day, to keep it holy and order early.
Honor thy hardware and software: that thy Internet connection may be long upon the net which the lord thy Gates hath given thee.
Thou shalt not remove Microsoft software.
Thou shalt not commit software or music piracy .
Thou shalt not post without citing sources.
Thou shalt not give memos to Janet Reno.
Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's ocurina, accordian or nose flute.
After this manner therefore pray ye: Our holy Mudcat, who art in Cyberspace, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done in the LAN as it is in Cyberspace. Give us this day our daily download. Forgive us our spam, as we forgive those who spam against us. And lead us not into the hands of the copyright police, but deliver us from system errors: For thine is the domain name and the bandwidth and the start page, forever and ever. Amen.
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: MudGuard Date: 05 Jul 99 - 02:57 AM As Max, Dick, Susan, Joe and Art are already proposed to be Saints, who will be the high priests? And what kind of food do you offer (instead of a plate of brown rice and yogurt)??? |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: Rick Fielding Date: 05 Jul 99 - 01:57 AM Bbc, let your son witness all that goes on here at the Church of the Mudcat and I guarantee you he'll run into the first house of worship he sees just to recover his sanity! Once while playing frisbee in a park, I was approached by two Hare-Krishnas and invited to a feast at their temple that night. Well this was in the days when I'd do anything once, so I thought, "Ok, they'll probably have neat Indian food or something". I went. I listened to 2 hours of chanting and got a styrofoam plate of brown rice and yogurt. Some feast. I'll take Mudcat! |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: Fadac Date: 04 Jul 99 - 10:27 PM In the begining there was mud. Then there was clay, from the clay came the Possom. The Cat found it good. The sun shone and smiled down upon the Cat, the mud, and the Possom. Only the great can blow the hole. Tap the tapper. and Pokey the Hokey. Only good comes from this. We the humble, bow before the one with the Possom. Humble in our hearts and loud in our shirts, we ask. WHERE IN THE BLOOMEN' BLOODY HELL CAN I GET ONE? With sad heart, and bowed head, this poor Fadac, goes quietly to practice Lady Of Spain, upon the box of squeeze, For someday, some will say. GET IT HERE! Then there will be joy in the land. -Fadac |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: bseed(charleskratz) Date: 04 Jul 99 - 10:14 PM And that has to be another bit of Mudcat Religion's holy text. Note: We believers in the spirit of the Mudcat do not insist that all members of the society believe as we do. We're a tolerant lot who believe--Mud is thicker than water. --seed
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: Bill D Date: 04 Jul 99 - 10:07 PM *grin*...and there was a guy who claimed to be offended by potato ads in the newspaper, too....some people handle snakes, some shave their heads & wear saffron robes, some sacrifice goats...I imagine that reverence for ceramic possums is not too far out... 'I may not agree with what you believe, but I will defend to the death your right to believe it...and my right to giggle at it..' *ßill D--1999* |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: bbc Date: 04 Jul 99 - 09:02 PM This thread could offend some who have a more traditional spiritual leaning. My son is already concerned that we are a cult, given the devotion we seem to have to the 'cat & the amount of time we spend on it. Just a thought. bbc |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: catspaw49 Date: 04 Jul 99 - 08:49 PM So above the altar we hang a tiple suspended by two condoms. catspaw |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: bseed(charleskratz) Date: 04 Jul 99 - 08:12 PM Omigod, Peter--The hagiography must of course be updated to include Sts. Max and Dick, Ste. Susan, San Jose, St. Arthur... What an absolutely fantabulous song, a masterwork indeed. --seed p.s., and Dave, right you are: add 'em to the list of holy icons. |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: Bill D Date: 04 Jul 99 - 07:40 PM and OH the entries in the Hymn Book... "The 'Cat Came Back"; "Blow, Bullies, Blow"; and this number that Peter T gave us long ago..
MAX (to the tune of "You Gotta Have Heart") You gotta have Max, (Max D. Spiegel's It began with a song If you want to sort ascending (doowadoo) (If it's illegal, He'll give you your choice Max is always plotting something (doowadoo) (Hey ma'am or hey sir, wanna get yourself a tracer?) You gotta have Max If you want your body searched (doowadoo) (Max Vobiscum, not Nabiscum!) Indestructible Max Yours, Peter
^^ |
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Subject: RE: Mudcat religion From: Dave Swan Date: 04 Jul 99 - 07:31 PM Let us not then ignore the monitor and keyboard, for they are good. They are vessel in which our humble petitions are carried unto the Mud which is the Cat. |
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Subject: Mudcat religion From: bseed(charleskratz) Date: 04 Jul 99 - 07:24 PM If we are to believe all of the glorious praise which has been heaped upon the Mudcat and its membership, it must be a religion. If indeed it is, we should define its creed, identify its saints, describe its holy rituals and holy relics, and... I'll start with the easy part, the rituals and relics: Naturally, the most holy ritual is the Hokey Pokey... The most holy relic is the possum ocarina Barbara made for Catspaw, especially since it had the string attached... Most notable among the saints is Barbara who has bestowed blessings upon us all... --seed |
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