A request from kat- new blog posting-April 2010

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-update 2 Apr 2010
From: Tinker
Date: 06 Apr 10 - 09:05 AM

You've been in my thoughts dear one, but come to find out the body aches which I thought were from being on my feet so much last week preparing for Easter weekend well, it seems I also gave a tick a ride home from my retreat and have Lyme Disease..... As I rest in the sunshine you are in my thoughts....

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-update 2 Apr 2010
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 05 Apr 10 - 06:29 PM

It sounds like he's very close to making things work again. Let's hope he manages that one step in front of the other and gets it going this time.

SRS

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-update 2 Apr 2010
From: jacqui.c
Date: 05 Apr 10 - 02:46 PM

Hope things work out Kat - no matter how old our children get to be we still worry about their well being.

Good thoughts coming to all of you from Maine.

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-update 2 Apr
From: Bonnie Shaljean
Date: 05 Apr 10 - 01:15 PM

Wishing restful sleep and peace to you, that the downtown cottage rental works out for Colin (let us know), and that all the visiting kitties behave themselves. Happy Easter (remember it represents a new beginning).

B xx

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-update 2 Apr 2010
From: katlaughing
Date: 05 Apr 10 - 10:54 AM

Thanks, Sins, 2Ls. Vtam, Janie, and the rest of you. He is up and just taking a shower. Said he didn't feel like doing anything for lack of sleep, but knows he has to go box up the rest of his stuff AND that he cannot be here during the day. Me? I am going back to bed. Third night in a row of no sleep and I've got to replenish. I don't think it is from fretting, rather emotional eating within my WW points, but still adding an .8 of a pound and it is noticeable, plus my body is a little sluggish and won't let me sleep when it gets that way.
Here's hoping he gets his paycheck, lines up more jobs, gets his unemployment, goes to AA, and etc, etc! He has been told staying here hinges on these things and I think he is motivated regardless. The caravan is not the most comfy, ideal situation. Thanks for your help and love, Dear Ones,

luvyakat

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-update 2 Apr 2010
From: SINSULL
Date: 05 Apr 10 - 10:05 AM

Sun's up. Another warm and beautiful day. Hope all is well at the kathouse.
Mary

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-update 2 Apr 2010
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 04 Apr 10 - 06:32 PM

love.........................♥♥♥

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-update 2 Apr 2010
From: SINSULL
Date: 04 Apr 10 - 03:30 PM

Always here for for you, Miss Kitty. Wish I could offer more than an attaboy.
Mary

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-update 2 Apr 2010
From: katlaughing
Date: 04 Apr 10 - 02:51 PM

Thanks for the dream wishes. I had a difficult time settling...finally slept from about 6a-9a when my dau. called to invite us over for the Hunt and it was Nanny Dizzy's bday (the matriarchal pit bull 13 yr old lady) so she got a toy football to puncture and tease us all with. She is such a doll.

There may be a chink in my dau.'s armour...she okay'd Morgan coming over here as long as Colin is out in the caravan, his Blazer, or gone doing stuff. When she heard he is looking for a rental, she offered to talk to the friend whom they helped move yesterday. She had a small cottage downtown with a lease through Aug, which the landlord won't release, and pets are okay, so it may be doable. We'll know more tomorrow when Colin sees how much work he can line up or how quickly he can get unemployment...he's still active, just hasn't needed it recently.

The other good thing, is he did some major decluttering of my caravan as we had tons on empty boxes and stuff in there. Rog helped. It's actually a huge relief that that job has been started. Now, if only my sisters would get their junk out of it!*bg* It is NOT comfy and he will not be staying long, but his cats are familiar with it and needed to get out of his Blazer. There is a bed, lights and heat if he needs it. He cannot be here during the day and no drinking, has to go to AA, counselling, etc. He knows it is that OR he is out to the shelter...his kitties can stay. So far he's been resolved and doing well. Right now, he is over at Melissa's packing his stuff and there was a noon AA mtg. he thought he might get to...otherwise there are others.

Thanks for your continued support, my friends,

luvyakat

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-update 2 Apr 2010
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 11:27 AM

hope you and Colin had good rest.


hug

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-update 2 Apr
From: Janie
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 01:07 AM

I second Stilly, Kat. Sweet dreams.

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-update 2 Apr 2010
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 12:35 AM

Oy.

Sweet dreams, Kat.

SRS

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-update 2 Apr 2010
From: Art Thieme
Date: 02 Apr 10 - 10:40 PM

Kat,
Someone once said, "Ninety percent of life is just showing up!"

I'm glad he has begun...

Art

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-update 2 Apr 2010
From: katlaughing
Date: 02 Apr 10 - 10:22 PM

Thank you so much, my friends. She came home and had a fit about him being there. By law, he has one more week to get out of there, but she got ugly tonight and threatened him with her "big guns" i.e. "big, ugly guys" who work at the restaurant where she works. I know she did this out of fear and rage, disappointment, etc. and because of her own past experiences with alcohol, but nobody threatens my son; she has lost a friend and support, although I will be civil. I don't believe in kicking someone when they have been so down and vulnerable and then demonstrated they are working on rehab. Oh well. For now, he is in our driveway with his kitties, a SAFE space heater, and a snuggly sleeping bag. He is exhausted, has spoken with a counsellor and we will help him sort out some things, tomorrow, as in where to park his van, where to live, etc.

He just came in to say Melissa is calmed down and told him thank you for not being there, tonight, and apologised for not wanting to speak to me, earlier. She and I have had good communication, so I will continue to keep those lines open, but will be a bit more circumspect than I have been with her.

And, now to a shower, then to bed...wish me sleep, please? Colin, too. Tomorrow morning could get interesting if my daughter calls and Morgan wants to come over...he is not allowed to see Colin as my dau. has been shunning him since a year ago last Christmas. It's fucked up, as far as Rog and I are concerned, but there ya go...we raised them to be independent and she is a stubborn, judgmental person. I hope she grows up someday.

This too shall pass, eh?:-)

luvyakat

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-update 2 Apr 2010
From: olddude
Date: 02 Apr 10 - 09:15 PM

I AM RIGHT HERE FOR YOU ANYTIME KAT
you call anytime

love Dan

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-update 2 Apr 2010
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 02 Apr 10 - 08:26 PM

Oh, Kat, that's good news. One day at a time, indeed, but it looks as though there's a chance this might work. Blessings on you and Colin and everybody!

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-update 2 Apr 2010
From: gnu
Date: 02 Apr 10 - 08:11 PM

Good news! T&Ps.

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: katlaughing
Date: 02 Apr 10 - 07:44 PM

And, here it comes, some good news,...one day at a time, as they say and I know, but my son is at an AA mtg. as I type and I am gratefull! He went home today armed with phone numbers of counsellors, AA folks, and others he can call/see at any time; is seeing his doc, who now knows what he was doing and how serious it is, this coming week; and, has a therapy appt. this coming week, too AND, a commitment to himself and the rest of us to go to AA daily. As he said, that is what worked for him before, for ninety days until he convinced himself he could do it alone (not!) Still don't know if he can stay with Melissa and Patrick until the rental unit is ready on May 1st, (they are supposed to talk tonight) but, for now, he is sober and has taken that first step. He still feels really crappy, physically, and was just going to go to bed and go to a mtg. in the AM, until I reminded him that's what he kept doing and none of us will believe him if he promises and then puts it off. He had offers of rides, etc. no excuses. I am pleased he chose the wise way and went to the mtg.

Thank you, all!

kat

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: katlaughing
Date: 31 Mar 10 - 09:44 PM

Thanks for the PMs and offers for phone visits, folks. Right now, I feel kind of talked out, but I know there will be a time, very soon, when I will want to call and have a good visit; I hope with good news to recount.

luvyakat

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: jacqui.c
Date: 31 Mar 10 - 07:23 PM

Still here Kat - hoping for the best.

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 31 Mar 10 - 07:15 PM

You know you are held in love, my dear. So is Colin and your whole family.


Allison

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: katlaughing
Date: 31 Mar 10 - 05:47 PM

My Fine Art, you have had a LOT on your plate lately. I didn't expect you to be around much AND I didn't want to add any to your burdens. Just knowing you care, as do the others, is of great solace to me. Thank you all...Neil, there is much solace and many wise words on here which are all helpful. I am most gratefull.

In the past hour, after talking to a triage nurse at Colin's doc's office, I called EMS and requested they do a welfare check and transport him to a place which deals with these kinds of things. He had blown off his first counselling session, was drinking and taking prescription meds. His doc is now fully aware and he will be in good care, at least for the night. I told them he is suicidal, as far as I am concerned, if not quickly, at least slowly, the latter of which he has agreed with when we've talked. He has respect for the place they are taking him and promised to be honest about feeling this is the worst he's ever felt in his life. I only hope he really will be.

For now, I feel relieved and, I hope, the others involved will also. After tonight, we'll just have to see where the chips fall.

Thank you, all, again. I can never say that enough to each and everyone of you.

katonetoughmom!

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: Art Thieme
Date: 31 Mar 10 - 05:04 PM

Kat, Even when we talked recently I had no iidea that all this was going on. I completely lost this thread as it xhxnged and lengthened. Either that or my very real problems with recent memory have blunted my sensitivity. I'm just sorry it's all happening--as is Carol. I''l be thinking of you, and looking in here now that I've finally a bit more aware.

Love to you and Rog,

Art

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: GUEST,Neil D
Date: 31 Mar 10 - 09:54 AM

Keep yourself whole, do what you can for everyone else and leave the rest to fate. I wish we could give you some solace but we're sending our best wishes for the best possible outcome.
                               Neil and Christina

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: mouldy
Date: 31 Mar 10 - 06:56 AM

Sending as much as I can from this side of the pond.

Here's hoping a way can be found to enable him to pour out all that he needs to. He needs to come to realise how much he is loved, shown by all the efforts that are being made on his behalf.

Easier said than done...

Andrea x

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar
From: Genie
Date: 31 Mar 10 - 03:07 AM

Kat, I haven't been online much over the last few days. Just now catching up with your thread. I am sending asking as much good energy, calm, peacefullness, as I can muster. (I have a real cat curled up beside me to help with the calm and peacefulness.) I'm glad you are getting some good suggestions from Janie and others here.

Much love,

Genie

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: katlaughing
Date: 30 Mar 10 - 10:39 PM

By tomorrow morning, his doctor who prescribed yet another drug for him, over the phone, without knowing he is drinking, will know he is mixing the meds and alcohol. Not sure what good it will except to keep her from doing any more prescribing without seeing him. She will also know he was in the ER last night. And, so much for "detoxing" at home...he's at it, again, and has to move out by Thursday. My main concern is his 22 year old cat and his other cat. I think there are some options, but not involving me. His bio-father is going to talk with him tomorrow and he has the counselling session tomorrow, if he goes. At this point, I do not believe anything he tells me. I am working on fully and freely releasing him to his highest, surrendering him to the Cosmic. Thank you for you help, all of you Dear Ones.

If I do not answer your PMs please do not be offended or fret...my energy is a bit low right now. Thanks for understanding.

luvyakat

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: Maryrrf
Date: 30 Mar 10 - 10:35 PM

I don't post much nowadays, but I do check in. I hope things progress in the right direction and that things resolve for the highest good.

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar
From: Bonnie Shaljean
Date: 30 Mar 10 - 05:12 PM

I can't add anything to what everybody else has already said here, only echo it. Thinking of you, wishing you peace and comfort...

xxx

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar
From: Charley Noble
Date: 30 Mar 10 - 12:37 PM

Kat-

Best to you and your family.

I do hope Colin fully accepts the care and counseling he needs.

Charley Noble

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: katlaughing
Date: 30 Mar 10 - 12:07 PM

Thank you, my friends. He did survive the night. Slept in the driveway in his old, cold, uncomfortable Blazer with just a blanket until he went in and got his sleeping bag. I am gratefull he believed Melissa and me when we told him he could not sleep at home, i.e. in the house. He says today is "detox" day and has spoken to an AA friend who said he'd come get him to go to a mtg. Colin said he doesn't want to go open up in front of a group as he will break down and cry. Of course that is something he needs to do. He says he will with the therapist, tomorrow. We talked about his lack of self-love and how everything started going really down hill about nine years ago over a break-up. I know that is true, but I am not sure anything else he says right now. I asked him to please all the AA guy and go to a mtg. It's all I can do...will not get sucked in to the negative.

I actually slept fairly well until about 4a, then I was up and down About ready for a nap, now.:-)

Thank you for your aid, my dears,

luvyakat

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 30 Mar 10 - 10:26 AM

I'm reading along, fingers crossed that he gets the help he needs. As someone with my own family loose cannon to worry about, I'm afraid I don't have any tried and true advice. We haven't sorted out how to help our sibling. I also keep my fingers crossed when I read news accounts of some violent assault in that town that he wasn't the culprit. Or the victim, after pissing off the wrong person. Good luck. The moon is full, maybe the crisis will pass soon.

SRS

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: Tinker
Date: 30 Mar 10 - 09:17 AM

Arms open to hold you.....all of our physical health stuff pales... welcome the morning

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: SINSULL
Date: 30 Mar 10 - 08:36 AM

Stay strong, kat. This is a mother's worst nightmare. It doesn't matter if they are 16 or 40.
I keep you in my prayers.
Mary

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 30 Mar 10 - 08:33 AM

Here with you, my friend. I am thinking sensible logical things at the medicos, insisting they see the need to hold Colin over in hospital. Thinking some hope in the direction of Colin. Seems that is the ingredient he is missing about now.


hugs to you, dear one.

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: jacqui.c
Date: 30 Mar 10 - 07:59 AM

Thinking of you all my friend.

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 30 Mar 10 - 07:25 AM

Waves of love...

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: fat B****rd
Date: 30 Mar 10 - 05:32 AM

More kind regards and best thoughts to you and yours, Kat. X

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 30 Mar 10 - 01:41 AM

sending love & hugs to Colin & Melissa & Kat & everyone

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar
From: KT
Date: 29 Mar 10 - 11:55 PM

Exactly what Janie said.

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar
From: Janie
Date: 29 Mar 10 - 11:05 PM

Love and Light to all of you, Kat.

Janie

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: katlaughing
Date: 29 Mar 10 - 10:56 PM

Well, I just typed an update and it didn't take, got lost. I can't do it all right now, but he is refusing to stay in hospital and insisting he will go home. The hospital folks have deemed him fit to go home to detox (which he will not do according to past behaviour) and hadn't even notified his doc. I put a bug in their ear so maybe they will try to keep him. I have to let it go, tonight and take care of myself.

Thanks for any and all assistance,

luvyakat

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: Ebbie
Date: 29 Mar 10 - 10:05 PM

{{{{{{{W I D E hug}}}}}}}

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: katlaughing
Date: 29 Mar 10 - 09:55 PM

Thank you, my friends. Melissa just called to let me know he is now in hospital; they were checking his vitals when she left to take care of herself and collect her son from his friend's house. Thank goodness he didn't see or hear any of this, today. For now, Colin is safe and being cared for...that's all we can ask for at this point. It is still going to have to be him who wants to change and uses the tools available. We'll see where it goes after this day. It could be a long night for him, but I am sure there will be some sense of relief, too. I know without health insurance (he couldn't afford his Cobra payments) he didn't want to go in, but was also crying out about being so severely depressed. I am giving thanks for Melissa and her strength and love of him as well as all of you and family.

In gratitude and peace,

kat

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: Michael Harrison
Date: 29 Mar 10 - 09:46 PM

A lot of prayers and good thoughts have been coming down here to our house, both to me and my wonderful wife, Kelly, who now has to burden the whole of keeping our ship financially and physically afloat. We will share and direct those to your house, too. God bless. harrison

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Mar 10 - 09:27 PM

Whatever is in my power to do....

Subject: RE: A request from kat- help for son-please29 Mar 2010
From: maeve
Date: 29 Mar 10 - 08:32 PM

Here, Kat; waiting with you in whatever way I can.

m

Subject: RE: A request from kat- Family glitch 24 March 2010
From: katlaughing
Date: 29 Mar 10 - 08:28 PM

Please send whatever you can to our son, Colin, and his girlfriend, Melissa. He has not done well...has been using anti-depressants and valium and alcohol. It has come to a head, as we all suspected it would. She is either taking him to hospital, if he will go, or calling emergency services to remove him from their house. It can no longer go on the way it is, for either of them.

Please understand, I don't have the energy nor desire to relate all of what has been done to help, including tough love, nor to answer lots of questions. We know it is a cry for help and slow suicide, well maybe not so slow if it isn't stopped, and he does have a counselling appt. this Wed. but, of course that may be moot. I am okay...I was strong with him on the phone earlier, today, and just now with her. She has my support and love, as does he, but not for the self-destructiveness. She is making the right decision.

May the Light surround them and guide them through this time. I give thanks for this or something better for the highest good of all concerned. So mote it be.

Thank you, my friends,

luvyakat

Subject: RE: A request from kat- Family glitch 24 March 2010
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 26 Mar 10 - 07:41 PM

yah!

Subject: RE: A request from kat- Family glitch 24 March 2010
From: katlaughing
Date: 26 Mar 10 - 04:03 PM

Thank you, my friends. Things have calmed down, for the moment which is all we have really, the Now, right? I ought to have more to share after tonight. Apparently Colin & Melissa are to talk this evening. I didn't get much sleep so am off for a nap, now. Not sure if Morgan will be over or not. He and his dad were downtown after school and his mom gets home early, today, so I suspect he'll just stay home.

I found a fun-keep-my-mind-off-of-things site...keep an eye out for a thread on science experiments.:-) Morgan will love it.

Can't remember if I said I had a great session at biofeedback and, also, at therapy. Both are happy with where I am at and I am zoloft free!!

More as I know. Love you,

kat