Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls

Subject: Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls
From: GUEST,Ol' King Troll
Date: 23 Aug 00 - 07:48 PM

Mudcat is so much fun for trolls because, no matter how obvious the troll is, there are a bunch of Mudcatters who never fail to snap at the bait.

An obvious troll message will easily generate fifty or a hundred angry responses. If you people would just control your anger and ignore the obvious trolls, they would just go away.

Subject: RE: Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls
From: rabbitrunning
Date: 23 Aug 00 - 08:12 PM

Us catfishes is just plain naturally attracted to worms, I guess.

~~~~~~~~~~/ ><<<<<<> &

Subject: RE: Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls
From: GUEST,Joerg
Date: 23 Aug 00 - 08:47 PM

If there are people who think it's "fun" to be a troll - well I (capital capital i) think they don't know what fun is.

AND, you poor trolls, there is also FUN!

Interesting to me: Obviously one can get far ahead enough to be helpless against being offended by people who are proud of being far behind.

Joerg

Subject: RE: Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls
From: Lox
Date: 23 Aug 00 - 09:08 PM

The thing about trolls is that they're ugly, and they are easily outsmarted by goats.

Whats more, they have terrible warts and can't get jobs, otherwise they wouldn't live under bridges.

Did someone say worms?

Subject: RE: Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls
From: Troll
Date: 23 Aug 00 - 11:43 PM

I am Not ugly. Just ask my wife. And the goats cheat.

Furthermore, I have no warts (thanks to my dermatologist) and I don't need a job; I'm retired.(nyah, nyah,nyah)

And lastly I do not now, nor have I ever lived under a bridge of any kind. Not a bridge, overpass, trestle, and most certainly not a CULVERT!

I live in a very nice cave in a good neighborhood in a small southern town with my Wife, son, two cats,and my younger brother,who, for reasons of his own, lives in the garage.

So there.

troll

worms?

Subject: RE: Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls
From: Brendy
Date: 23 Aug 00 - 11:51 PM

Ah ah ah, Lox.
Lay off the unemployed.

B.

Subject: RE: Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls
From: katlaughing
Date: 23 Aug 00 - 11:54 PM

Here you go, Troll, with a capital "T"; thought you might like this:

Trolls

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Most often the term "troll" is used in a derogatory manner on the internet to refer to unsavory folks. However, since we wish to be open to people of other races/genders/religions/evolutions, we asked for the Troll's viewpoint. Here, presenting the opposing viewingpoint, is Mike Troll

An open letter to the internet from Trolls United Against Defamation.

I'm posting this note to the above newsgroups because I feel that they are they probably the ones that would best understand what I'm about to relate in this note. First an introduction - what I'd like to talk about are "Trolls" - we've been much maligned over the years but we've decided to come out from under our 'bridges' and once again take our rightful place in society.

Many of you older readers may remember the friendly little man who lived under the courthouse steps in your home town, he was a well-liked and respected member of the community, your parents approved of his occupation and understood that "it was a tough job, but someone had to do it". In small town America in the '50s no one questioned the valuable place your local trolls played in society.

Readers who grew up in the '60s may remember being distraught by Oppie's special friend Max's sudden disappearance from Mayberry after the actor who played him was blacklisted following the McCarthy hearings.

Let me try and explain the whole sordid story as briefly as possible. It all started with what we trolls commonly refer to as "that goat incident". Back in the spring of 1964 there were wild press reports from Eastern Europe about a poor hungry troll molesting some goats who woke him up while sleeping under a bridge - naturally the press blew it way out of proportion, someone noticed that not only were there trolls behind the iron curtain, but here in the US too - Joe McCarthy (a lawyer!) came out of retirement and started up 'HURT' the 'House Unamerican Reaction to Trolls' - Trolls were subpoenaed, question, publicly vilified and driven from their occupations all across the country, in the south trolls were driven from town by the KKK on horseback. Those trolls whom survived moved to the wilder parts of the country to hide out, some even moved north to Canada.

At the time our knowledge of ecology and ecosystems was not great enough for anybody to predict the horrible results this would cause. As the Soviets were finding out by the '60s if you take away it's usual prey a predator will turn elsewhere, having banned lawyers in most communist countries this of course explains the plight of that poor hungry troll under that bridge that started this whole mess.

After banning Trolls the US is now suffering from a most horrible scourge. Just like removing the wolves from Yellowstone resulted in Elk herds that multiplied out of control and devastated the grazing for all other species, taking your local troll out from his usual place below the courthouse steps has resulted in lawyers multiplying completely out of control with dire consequences to all parts of society.

We intend to once again become the respected useful members of society our parents and grandparents were. And after much soul-searching we realized that we would need good legal council - as you might imagine this was hard to come by, so we decided that we needed to train some of our own people in the law. I, and my colleagues, worked our way through law school, it was hard, we suffered under much discrimination from the faculty, we spent long nights suffering working through the law books, and days resisting temptation in class. In the end we graduated, top of our class, in fact in that year we were the only ones who graduated. We moved into private practice as "Troll, Troll, Troll and Bandicoot" mostly doing civil rights law for other trolls. Recently you may have heard of the very substantial out of court settlement we received from the Tolkien estate in our libel case. We intend to use this money to fund future legal work for our clients.

Which brings me to the main purpose of this letter .... it has come to our attention that some people on the internet have been using the name 'troll' in a negative, derogatory manner. This must stop immediately. Along with our co-litigants the Spam Industry Council we are today serving a class action suit, on behalf of all trolls everywhere, on all people who have participated in the practice of 'trolling'.

We were lucky that the law firm of Canter&Siegel after some initial reluctance were yum^H^H^H able to help us in searching the Usenet archives to discover the perpetrators and to electronically serve all those who were found responsible.

Once these cases are closed I hope that this will be the end of this matter.

Thank you for your attention

Mike Troll Attorney at Law Troll, Troll, Troll, and Bandicoot

--------------------------------------------------------------------- Trolls United will never be defeated - take a lawyer to lunch

Originally found on: alt.usenet.reposts As posted by: Mike Troll ([e-mail]) Author: Same (An original article) Date: 6 Jun 1995

Subject: RE: Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls
From: Troll
Date: 24 Aug 00 - 12:08 AM

kat: Thank you for one of the best laughs I've had in many a moon.

I've been "troll" or "ol'troll" since the CB days of the 70's and have never found a reason to change.

I took the name after a young lady upon whom I had -shall we say- designs, informed me that she could never get romantically involved with me because I had the manners and disposition of a troll with a toothache. We had both been drinking a bit at the time. We later almost got married but thats another story.

Lawyers are ok but they are a real bugger to clean.

troll

and it's "troll" with a lowercase "t".

Subject: RE: Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls
From: Clifton53
Date: 24 Aug 00 - 01:20 AM

" Troll Troll Troll cake, Please good missus' 'a troll cake"

Clifton

Subject: RE: Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls
From: Rollo
Date: 24 Aug 00 - 08:19 AM

I asked Grendel from next door why mudcat is so much fun for trolls. he said: "Mudcat no be fun fer trolls. 'Tiz gettin' on me nurves when I be workin' under me bridge all diz fishermen lurkin' around. Alzo 'tiz no eazy ter catch dem an' de tazte is ter muddy. An' yer hav' ter strap off de rubbah bootz furst fer a good meal.

Me prefer sheep an' cattle an' young maiden best. Orr zum hero to hav' fun with."

Subject: RE: Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls
From: Troll
Date: 24 Aug 00 - 08:58 AM

Knights is good too. Crunchy on the outside 'n soft 'n chewey in th' middle.

I like fun with young maidens but Wife says no-go.

troll

Subject: RE: Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls
From: Lox
Date: 24 Aug 00 - 09:30 PM

I'm unemployed.

(I'm a musician - I thought that would have been obvious.)

Lox.

Subject: RE: Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls
From: Brendy
Date: 24 Aug 00 - 10:03 PM

So are other people.

B.

Subject: RE: Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Aug 00 - 10:17 PM

Hmmm. Is this compassion, Brendy? Applause, applause.

Ol' Troll - Angry? Who's angry? The only person who's succeeded in getting me angry around here is flattop, and he's an old friend of mine. That's probably why I got angry.

You wanta see some lowdown on trolls, read Elfquest.

Subject: RE: Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls
From: Troll
Date: 24 Aug 00 - 10:45 PM

I've read Elfquest. I have a picture of my son at age 10 as Cutter for halloween. The Pinnis were at a Con here in Fla. and we got to meet them. Nice folks. Martin got an autographed picture of Stargazer which is still on his wall (he's now 17). He wrote a song based on Elfquest for our family bands first cassette. He now gets horribly embarassed if anyone mentions it.

Elfquests trolls live in caves, it's true, but they lack an appreciation for the finer things in life like vintage guitars and a good 401-K. Of course they don't have any lawyers so maybe they warrant a closer look.

Bash first and then ask questions is another trait that bears further investigation, Perhaps they have some other good points that I have overlooked.

Let me get back to you on that one.

Little Hawk: I don't think I asked why you were angry on this thread. maybe a little cross-thread drift?

troll

Subject: RE: Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Aug 00 - 03:24 PM

No, not me, it was people in general whose anger you were referring to actually. You said their anger was usually sufficient to generate 50 to 100 posts, or something like that...

ELFQUEST!!! Yay! What a wonderful tale that was, and beautifully drawn. What's your take on Picknose...did you like him? How about Two-Edge? My favourite character in the whole series was Skywise...if I could be any one of them it would be Skywise.

Subject: RE: Why Mudcat is so much fun for trolls
From: Troll
Date: 25 Aug 00 - 08:55 PM

L.H.: Me and Old King Troll are two entirely different people...er...trolls. If he wants to be king, GO FOR IT! I'm retired. Bein' a king is too dang much like work.

I liked Picky. I think that he grew into the job and turned out to be a good guy in spite of himself and not just a foil for the elves.

Two-Edge? I dunno. A little too close to home for me. It's hard to never feel like you truly belong. I feel a great deal of sympathy for him but it's not what he needs or wants. A very complex character.

If I could be an elf? Treestump would suit me fine. Otherwise, Picknose.

troll