How to really annoy people - Part Duh

Subject: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: Little Hawk
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 11:05 AM

Relaunch the "How to really annoy folks" thread.

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 11:28 AM

Sticking two large oil funnels into my rosewood kazoo and playing (sic) "You Light up my Life" would qualify. Louder than Pete Townsend at his best.

Rick

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: KingBrilliant
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 11:33 AM

Saying someone's name continually before each sentence, to get their attention. So mum says !

- Hammarite

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: KingBrilliant
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 11:34 AM

Too true Hammerite.......

Mum

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: catspaw49
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 12:34 PM

Continuing this thread with a Part 2, or in this case, "Duh."

Reading an even dumber thread about "Folk Music."

Spaw

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: Mrs.Duck
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:09 PM

The fact that I am Geoff the Duck, but I happen to be using Internet Exploder instead of Netscape means that you all think that I am my dear wife is something which I find particularly annoying. While I always respect the opinions of Mrs.Duck they are not necessarily identical with my own. The fact that Mr **** Gates is an obnoxious GIT who should have been drowned at birth and never been let near a computer (unless it was plugged into his bath) is no excuse for the world being ruined by me having to waste my precious time using CRAP BLOATED SOFTWARE which only ever does things I do not need it to do - but never does the things which a reasonable intelligent person would require. That is what I find annoying!
Quack! (Geoff the Duck)

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: Mrs.Duck
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:22 PM

ALSO the fact that Bas**rd Gates's software logged me off the internet whilst I was writing my last message, and it took me about ten minutes to log back on to post it gives me more annoyance which quite frankly I can do without.
Also the fact that I am STILL Geoff the Duck, but Interminably Crap Explorer will continue to insist that I am my wife unless I go to the Mudcat Login page and reset the computer's cookie and thereby bollocks-up any messages which Jane might wish to send. That annoys me.
Also the fact that I am sat here with an incredibly strange feeling of Deja-vu not so much annoys as worries me. Have I been here (in this conversation) before??? I don't know!
Quack!
Geoff the Duck.

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: Mrs.Duck
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:23 PM

They disconnected me again!!!!!!
Is this becoming my personal thread?
Geoff the Duck.

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: Little Hawk
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:24 PM

Geoff - Are you experiencing deja vu? Here's a little poem...

Mary had a rooster
She also had a duck
She put them on the windowsill to see if they would...
Play and sing.

The duck began to waddle
And the rooster had a fit
He jumped into a bucket that was full of...
Poodle hair and stuff.

The poodle came a-running
To see what had gone wrong
He tripped over the bannister and twisted off his...
Collarchain.

The rooster broke out laughing
To see the poodle fall
The duck jumped off the windowsill and pecked off both his....
Licenses.

The poodle, in a fury,
Tried to tear the duck to bits
The rooster lost his head and tried to hide in Mary's...
Chest of drawers.

The poodle chased the duck
Around the room from back to front
The rooster and the duck both tried to hide in Mary's...
Jewelery box.

Now Mary's had them stuffed
And she keeps them on the shelf
And if that's not enough for you, then go get stuffed yourself!!!

As you can see...it was primarily the duck who was responsible for the whole tragic episode, the pervert! I hope that, as a duck, you are suitable sorry.

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: Little Hawk
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:32 PM

King Brilliant - Or...do what my dad does...preface every monologue with the word "Listen..." He does that just to be sure you do, cos he himself seldom listens to what anyone has to say...unless they have something he wants, that is...like money.

Rick - follow that version of "You Light Up My Life" with a similar rendition of "Sometimes When We Touch" and I guarantee that you will never play Orillia again! :-D

- George

Geoff - You can reset your cookie by going to Quick links. Try it. Then you will not appear as Mrs. Duck. I learned this through bitter experience, after posting on Fidel Castro's cookie one time, while using his computer...man, did I ever get in trouble! :-)

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: mousethief
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:32 PM

Pete Townshend at his best is completely silent.

Alex
O..O
=o=

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: GUEST,Pete Townsend
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:35 PM

So is Mousetheif.

Pete Townsend (who knows how to spell Mousethief)

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:40 PM

"Pete Townshend at his best is completely silent."

That works pretty well, especially when someone is on the phone to you with some kind of grievance against you. Just don't give the grunts and the little sounds that indicate you are listening. Just listen in total silence, and when they say "Are you there still?" you just say "Yes," and stay silent. Drives em crazy.

And face to face you can do the same, just don't give the body language nods and that. When you do it to someone in authority that's called "Dumb Insolance".

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: GUEST,Dan Quayle
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:42 PM

Repeat stupid spelling mistakes just like McGrath of Harlow does.

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: GUEST,Dan Quayle
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:45 PM

Sorry, I pushed the button too soon.

I meant to ask McGrath of Harlow if he meant "insolence?" "Insolance" is not in my Mr. Potato Head Dictionary.

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: GUEST,Pete Townsend
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:47 PM

I also know how to spell "McGrath of Harlow."

Pete Townsend

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: Ebbie
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 02:00 PM

Guest, you're giving d. quayle a bad name.

Ebbie

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: wildlone
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 02:12 PM

Ride a motorcycle down the 303 from Honiton get caught up in a tail back caused by one of the many carnival floats that clog up the roads at this time of the year traveling at 10 mph overtake all the traffic at 20 mph, get in front when doing the national speed limit of 60 mph get overtaken by boy racer in his little portable boom box,wait behind until you come to the really twisty bends overtake and watch as he tries to keep up.

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: wildlone
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 02:17 PM

I see our anal retentive Gusset is still with us

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: Mrrzy
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 02:53 PM

I don't know ho he does it, but the younger of my twins does it so well!

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: GUEST,Joerg
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 08:49 PM

Geoff -

I agree that Mr. *BG* should have been drowned long before, but I can by no means agree that this would have been at his birth. He (i.e. Microsoft) did extremely good work until some §$%&@! convinced him that there was a chance to make much more money by considering the world analphabetic and therefore inventing Windoze. Unfortunately that f* a*h* was right. The world does indeed not object to paying much, MUCH, MMUUCCHH money for being considered analphabetic. Wanna be an intellectual? Just tell the people that simple things are complicated. Wanna be a billionaire? Just tell the people that complicated things are simple.

Things like these happen when the heads of kids rise faster than their feet are able to still touch the ground. Get your head as high as you want, but do it BY GROWING. (That's my own one).

Things like what happened there are the kind of things that really annoy me.

And sorry for being so late again.

Joerg

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: Little Hawk
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 09:14 PM

Gentlemen, you are quite right. Microsoft has foisted ridiculously top-heavy software on a hapless public, by assuming people are too lazy to read. Fortunately, talk forums such as this one are proving them wrong. Where TV turned people into couch potatoes, the Net is liberating them to some extent by making them active participants in the process. It is also allowing great worldwide communications between private individuals, and that is an excellent thing, so there is something to be happy about there.

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: CarolC
Date: 21 Oct 00 - 09:51 PM

Become a member of a website and forum that is devoted to the discussion and promotion of folk, traditional, and blues music, and talk incessantly about accordions. (Try it. It's fun!)

Carol

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: Little Hawk
Date: 22 Oct 00 - 01:33 AM

Yeah, but it's more fun playing them, I hear.

Besides, I'd rather talk incessantly about Bob Dylan. Have I explained "Ballad Of A Thin Man" yet? Got a couple of hours? Hmmmm?

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: CarolC
Date: 22 Oct 00 - 01:44 AM

Little Hawk, I agree with you that talking about Bob Dylan is annoying. Singing his songs is even more annoying. How about going for the BIG ENCHILADA, and learning to play the accordion while singing Dylan songs and talking about him? You could come to my accordion workshops in May, and take lessons from Skipjack.

Spaw could never compete with all of that.

Carol

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: Little Hawk
Date: 22 Oct 00 - 10:20 AM

You have a really nasty mind, Carol. You're right, Spaw could never keep up with that. I like it. I will have to give this serious thought, and get back to you on it ASAP. Of course, I've got till May, don't I? Perfect!

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: Troll
Date: 22 Oct 00 - 11:05 PM

And you don't HAVE to deal with the people on the forum in person unless you want to. Except for Skeptic. I see him nearly every day.
Oh well, nothings perfect.

troll

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: GUEST,Alliekatt
Date: 23 Oct 00 - 12:08 AM

Using apostrophe's to make all the plural's like the moron's who write the days special's on their diners dry erase board's.

And by the way I used to believe that only pobucker Yank's did it, but now since I've been to Ireland, their just as guilty of it too, maybe even more so. Tsk Tsk.

As a matter of fact I think its getting popular everywhere in the English speaking country's.

Donut's 50 cent's.

Subject: RE: How to REALLY ANNOY PEOPLE - Part Duh
From: kimmers
Date: 23 Oct 00 - 12:24 AM

When people *do* persist in all of that apostrophe abuse, one way to be suitably annoying is to point it out to them. Reapeatedly. I live for this.

My office administrator cannot write a simple memo without at least one extra or missing apostrophe or misused word. I amuse myself by red-inking his memos and giving them back to him for correcting. Reminds him of who's in charge.