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BS: New Year's at El Swanno's
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Subject: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Peter Kasin Date: 04 Jan 03 - 12:56 AM Pam and Dave Swan hosted another of their big annual new year's day bashes at their beautiful East bay home. I thought I'd report on the event, which was, as every year, eventful. It started at 12 noon, as every year. The early crowd has more of the relatives and non-music friends than later. I arrived around 4:45, in time for the singing and tune session to begin. It was a bigger crowd than usual this year. Pam and Dave are great hosts. Dave cooks his legendary vegetarian pizzas, and Pam makes her equally legendary Thai vegetable soup. It's a great schmooze party as well as a music party. Eat, sing, play, talk, eat more, sing more, talk more.... It started to get eventful around 8pm. Pam was bringing out a fresh tureen of soup when she accidentally tripped over BSeed's outstretched legs, sticking out from his 6'8 frame as he played a tune on his banjo. Half the soup went on Seed's lap, the tureen flying away and landing on top of Riggy's head while he was taking out his concertina. Unable to see anything or remove the tureen, which fit his head like a surgical glove, he tried to use it as a battering ram in order to break it. He aimed for nothing in particular and charged ahead. Fearing for his life, as he was charging straight towards him, Dave opened the front door and watched as Riggy charged through it and out onto the front porch, knocking over Pam's best friend as she was reaching for a bottle of ale from one of the coolers. In a panic, Pam ran outside and wheeled Riggy around towards the open door. Riggy charged back inside and ran, head down, straight into Seed, who pushed him back against another singer, who promptly flung her guitar down and put Riggy in a headlock. Thinking Riggy was being attacked, Radriano, who just entered, grabbed hold of the guitar player, who still had Riggy in the headlock, and tried to pry her loose. Other guests joined the fray, some grabbing Riggys legs and puling him in one direction, others grabbing Radriano and the guitar player and trying to pull him in the opposite direction. Spilling out onto the porch, the growing tug of war attracted about 30 neighbors who heard the commotion. Never wanting to miss a Swanfest, the neighborhood joined in the fray, choosing between the guitar pullers and the concertina pullers. One of the neighbors was wearing his 49ers jersey, and as he grabbed the shirt of a Raiders fan in front of him, rumors began to spread throughout the neighborhood that 49ers fans were invading an Oakland Raiders fan's party and causing a ruckus. Calls went out to the "Raider Nation" (hardcore Raiders football fans) and a Raiders rescue posse was quickly formed. In only fifteen minutes, a mass of over 500 fans in silver and black jerseys and face paint converged on the Swan home. This ofcourse angered the 49er fan, who decided to even the odds, and, going to the Swan' computer, put out an e mail alert to the "49er Faithful" to rescue him. Braving the bridge traffic, a red and gold 'niners fan battalion arrived and joined the battle, which now raged over several blocks. The police and fire departments were alerted, and an all-points announcement brought a force of 600 police officers to quell the disturbance. Several 49er fans, also being folk musicians, decided to e mail the 2,000-strong mailing list of the city's folk music club, accordion club, and Scottish fiddle club. Brandishing accordions, pipes, didgeridoos, bodhrans, and copies of Rise Up Singing, the folk music club's elite SWAT team headed for the melee. Not to be outdone, the Bay Area Country Dance Society contacted the West coast Morris teams who were in town for an ale. Shouting "Wassail!" and Huzzah!" the Morris dancers gleefully danced into the now full-fledged riot, trying desperately to rescue any accordionists they could spot. Then all hell broke loose. Silver and black jerseyed fans lunged for red-tinted Paolo accordions, bodhrans were flung into backyards, handkerchiefs flew through the air, police and firefighter's bullhorns were stolen, and they tried desperately to calm the crowds by speaking through abandoned didgeridos, which only further inflamed the mob. Word quickly spread to the Governor's mansion in Sacramento, where the Governor called in reporters and declared Berkeley a disaster area (even though the party was in Oakland). Arriving on the scene and forming two contra lines, the 5,000 plus National Guard soldiers arranged the rioters into "ones" and "twos" couples, and executed a perfect California Twirl, swinging the rioters around and sending them through the lines and into the awaiting trucks. Order was finally restored at 4:00am. Thanks, Pam and Dave, for hosting another fantastic party. I hope Riggy finds a way to return your tureen. Chanteyranger |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Dave Swan Date: 04 Jan 03 - 01:14 AM It was exactly as Chanteyranger remembers it. - Dave & Pam |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Amos Date: 04 Jan 03 - 01:52 AM ROTFLMAO! Good thing I couldn't make it, Dave -- I am sure I would have started something! :>) A |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: katlaughing Date: 04 Jan 03 - 06:26 AM My, it's pretty deep in here!! LMAO!! This one's gonna be a Mudcat Classic!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: MMario Date: 04 Jan 03 - 09:08 AM *sogh* such a shame nothing ever happens in California. What you people need is some good New England Blood to help you learn to express your emotions. |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: SINSULL Date: 04 Jan 03 - 09:37 AM Did the hot soup burn Seed's privates? Or worse yet, damage the banjo? |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Tinker Date: 04 Jan 03 - 09:42 AM Sinsull, I'm glad you noticed the shocking disregard of intstrument care as well. Banjo, concertina, and guitar all flung down into the melee without regard !! Can we get an instrument condition update ?? |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Noreen Date: 04 Jan 03 - 12:31 PM Wonderful, chanteyranger! ...tried desperately to calm the crowds by speaking through abandoned didgeridos... ROTFL! |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Amos Date: 04 Jan 03 - 12:38 PM Chanyeyman, I think you need to own up to your gift and go public!! That is, if you've been taken down from the post-office walls yet! :>) A |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Winters Wages Date: 04 Jan 03 - 12:46 PM Napa State Hospital please copy! (LOL) |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Peter Kasin Date: 05 Jan 03 - 04:49 AM They rejected me, Winters Wages. |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Melani Date: 05 Jan 03 - 05:47 AM You should definitely consider re-applying. |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Peter Kasin Date: 06 Jan 03 - 04:56 AM Refresh |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: katlaughing Date: 06 Jan 03 - 10:32 AM I guess the other Layabouts-At-Large must be too busy on the job to stop in here. I really expected to hear their take on this departure from the usual um....well...laying about by El Swanno etc.! |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Winters Wages Date: 06 Jan 03 - 11:28 AM Melani: After some people heard my CD,I have been advised to apply (BG) WW |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Art Thieme Date: 06 Jan 03 - 04:14 PM That was nothing compared to what went down here. But I am real sorry that seed got spilled on the ground. That's where clones come from I've heard. ;-) Art Thieme |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Peter Kasin Date: 07 Jan 03 - 04:13 AM and it was "B" Seed yet. (after the "A" Seed is all used up). |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Peter Kasin Date: 07 Jan 03 - 10:30 PM Refresh |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: katlaughing Date: 07 Jan 03 - 10:32 PM Looks like the Layabouts At Large may be doing their jobs too well...**BG** |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Big Mick Date: 08 Jan 03 - 01:09 AM I will be back to respond as soon as I change my pants, and clean the mess off the keyboard and computer monitor................better blow my nose as well.................LMAO Mick |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Jeri Date: 08 Jan 03 - 12:52 PM In New England, we would have been glad for the soup-tureen-on-the-head as long as we could knock some eye-holes in it. Warm, y'know. at least once the chowda dries and the little bits of clam fall outta your hair. Mick, just how many keyboards and monitors have you gone through since you've been here at Mudcat? I mean, half the time it's stuff coming out your nose or eyes, and I don't wanna know what it is the other half. You need to wrap some plastic stuff over the keyboard and monitor. (Don't use aluminumium foil.) Maybe a clear shower curtain and you could just run the garden hose inside to clean up. SPLF could market the idea. |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Tinker Date: 08 Jan 03 - 01:22 PM Can Layabouts market?? Seems to be in violation of their basic mission statement.... Jeri, you better hope that Fielding guy doesn't take your suggestion for cleaning up.... This time we'll know who to blame.BG |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Jeri Date: 08 Jan 03 - 01:31 PM Tink, Heather's got brains, but 'RICK'...'CLEANING'...same sentence?! If Layabouts got shirts and Layabouts got a logo, Layabouts are already into marketing. Seems like marketing's a good thing for Layabouts to do...or for their un |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: MMario Date: 08 Jan 03 - 01:31 PM passive marketing. requires little to no exertion - perfect for layabouts |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: radriano Date: 08 Jan 03 - 07:11 PM I don't know what it is about a good fray but it just makes me disregard all care, cast my canes aside and jump in with vigor! Had I had my wits about me I could have used my canes to wreak havoc and pummel Seed with heavy blows on his skull and torso till he released the writhing Riggy who, at the time, was wRiggling indeed. Radriano |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Jeri Date: 08 Jan 03 - 07:29 PM Bruce "Radriano" Lee. "Canes of Fury" |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Amos Date: 08 Jan 03 - 09:42 PM LOL!! Two-fisted Crutch Wielder -- Rider From the Nursing Home-- The Stranger from the Third Floor Ward--- Slap Leather, Senior! LOL! A |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Susan A-R Date: 08 Jan 03 - 10:26 PM Ah yes, I can see it all. Wish I could ha been there. |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: radriano Date: 09 Jan 03 - 11:14 AM Hey now, I'm not that old, you know. "Canes of Fury" does have a nice ring to it though. |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Rick Fielding Date: 09 Jan 03 - 11:42 AM Oh MY GAWD!!! What IS the matter with me?! Four years on Mudcat and I've yet to once lose total control of my bodily fluids! It would appear that Big Mick spews fluids all over his work space at least thee times a day......and twenty minutes later....he's ready for another onslaught! I'm gonna try an experiment here..... OK, here goes: (drinks half cup of coffee....holds in mouth....thinks about #1. Pam Swan carrying soup....NUDE! #2. How'd we'd even FIT a six foot eight inch pianist (er.. banjoist) in our living room. #3. Big Mick replying to a Mudcat thread entitled "100 things to do with your expired IRA membership". .....oh oh,.....running out of breath....picturing Dave Swan dousing all with fire hose..............GULP! Nope....managed to swallow it. MICK.....have some control! |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Tinker Date: 09 Jan 03 - 11:57 AM Rick I apologise for my first comment but after review of the following I'm left with another question... (Original quote) "Pam was bringing out a fresh tureen of soup when she accidentally tripped...." (Rick's Hypothesis) "What IS the matter with me?! Four years on Mudcat and I've yet to once lose total control of my bodily fluids!" (Expeimental proceedure) "#1. Pam Swan carrying soup....NUDE!" Just one quetion... which bodily fluids were you concerned about anyway??? Never mind, Let's keep it rhetorical okay?? |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Jeri Date: 09 Jan 03 - 12:15 PM Tinker, I'm glad you got it first! It's not the sort of thing that would tickle most people's funny bone. |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Tinker Date: 09 Jan 03 - 12:58 PM Perhaps having met Pam at my first Getaway made this senerio(sp) much easier to visualize. Or maybe certain unnamed mudcatters having whetted an interest in Mississippi John Hurt and Memphis Minnie shouldn't be surprised if I start sounding more like Barrel House Annie and Lil Johnson now and then...Mudcatter's don't tend to be most people anyway. Okay, I'll go back to preparing this week's Sunday School lesson now... |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Amos Date: 09 Jan 03 - 02:39 PM SOme Mudcatters try as hard as they can to be most people, but somehow they never pull it off! :>) A |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Rick Fielding Date: 09 Jan 03 - 07:41 PM Look, I spend half my life picturing Pam Swan nude with soup....it has nuthing to do with the rest of my post! But sadly, I'm now having trouble NOT picturing Big Mick at his keyboard. Damn, it's hard when yer on drugs! (oh and plus, I'm reading neil Young's biography...so I'm very confused) |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Amos Date: 09 Jan 03 - 07:45 PM Rick: Enough, man -- I urgently beseech you to go onto a diet of fresh water and grape skins for a month, eschewing all use of cathode ray tubes and printed media, and take two hours of vigorous walking a day!! Do it for poor PJ's sake if not your own!! LOL!! A |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: catspaw49 Date: 10 Jan 03 - 07:46 AM I read this thread when it first began and I wanted to make a few comments on it. I couldn't. I waited a bit in the hopes I could make some additional jokes in relation to it. I couldn't. Several friends PM'ed me alerting me to this thread and suggesting I read it. I already had and was beginning to feel guilty for not commenting......but I couldn't. Finally, I have decided that there is indeed little to say.....except upon the issue of PJ and the Soup in the Nude bit. But first, let me make this statement to Chanteyranger: Peter, that is one of the funniest things ever written here. It's a work of art without peer on these threads. I have long suspected that you are indeed a funny sumbitch and pretty perverted as well. I base this on several things, including the fact that your hero is an obscure Albanian pants presser with a pierced tongue, and also that you are one of the very few grown men so puerile and moronic that you still have a copy of "The Crepitation Contest" and can (and do) quote it extensively. I also suspect but cannot prove that your brain was fried at an early age when a family friend drilled a hole in your head with a Black&Decker and claimed they were releasing demons. My heartiest congrats on this sick piece of work! As to Pam Swan carrying soup in the nude........Rick, I find it interesting that you have had this fantasy as well, since I have had it for quite some time now. I want to know if you have had other "Pam in the Nude" fantasies such as, mowing the grass, decorating the Christmas tree, feeding the pigeons, etc. BTW, Dave never enters into these in my case.....what about yours? Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Amos Date: 10 Jan 03 - 11:01 AM I wash my hands!! Obviously this is one of those things where, if you try to resist or correct it, it just doubles -- the Layabout OOBLECK from Inner Space! Gaaah! PJ, I'm sorry -- I tried to get these guys to change the channel but they weren't having any of it!! Mebbe we shouled talk to Koko about Rick and Spaw, eh? A |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Big Mick Date: 10 Jan 03 - 12:41 PM PUUUULLLLLLEEEEEZZZZZ..........I beg of you..........talk to Koko and see if you can get her interested in Rick and Spaw............since she did the Nads thing and started wearing fishnet stockings, she is right up Spaw's alley anyway..........Rick.............who you trying to shit?????.........Peej could get your attention only until you walked by a stringed instrument store and then she would be standing there nude with a pot of soup, on the sidewalk, all by herself...... Peter..........I sell subscriptions to The Crepitation Digest to help fund my various bad habits.......Interested? Mick |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Peter T. Date: 10 Jan 03 - 12:51 PM Is nude soup a consommé devoutly to be wished? yours, Peter T. |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Amos Date: 10 Jan 03 - 02:06 PM The soup kind of gets in the way of consommation, I believe, Peter.... |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Peter Kasin Date: 10 Jan 03 - 10:58 PM My god, Spaw, I think that's the finest compliment I've gotten here. just one innacuracy, though. My brains were never fried. They were scrambled. Chanteyranger |
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Subject: RE: BS: New Year's at El Swanno's From: Jeri Date: 10 Jan 03 - 11:12 PM In Toronto in the winter, I'd say it was a risky bisque. "Nude Soup" is a hell of a band name by the way. |