BS: What happens to.......

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 07 May 03 - 05:55 PM

We have no fewer than 6 remote controls for various things .... and that's just one room! Keep the buggers in a basket but they always end up spread across the house! Found the DVD remote in the fridge a while back.......

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 May 03 - 06:11 PM

You can increase your dependence on remotes greatly by destroying the TV(s) in your place with a gun, ax or crowbar. I recommend this technique highly. And think of all the great books you'll read instead! :-) The $ySStem has not yet figured out how to put interactive audiovisual advertising inside books...

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Doug_Remley
Date: 07 May 03 - 09:47 PM

JennyO, isn't it a tad difficalt to walk with socks sewed together? Socks are proof of sentient aliens. They escape from the washer or dryer and flee like large inchworms. Absolute proof is in the parking area near a laundromat in the village where the poor tykes have been run-over.

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 May 03 - 10:37 PM

The solution is simple. All pairs of socks must henceforth be joined together by a thin metal chain attached to a reinforced rim around the top of each sock. No more socks would be lost!

I have patented this idea, and expect to retire shortly, as the royalties pour in from a grateful World.

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 08 May 03 - 04:20 AM

Firstly LH - I resent the suggestion that people who watch TV, Video and DVDs don't listen to music or read books. I read books for at least 2 hours a day, probably more. The radio is nearly always on when I'm at home and we have a huge collection of CDs, cassettes and vinyl we listen to (mostly whilst posting here)! The intrusion of remote controls is minimal - it's the decrease in braincells, particularly those that control memory that is the problem. I find I'm watching more TV simply because I can't find the remote to turn it off (am presently unable to use the old fashioned method because I've injured my foot and the crutch doesn't reach that far) - I have to wait until the child comes home so I can get her to change the channels.

Similarly, I find I'm reading more in the mornings because I can't find the remote to turn the TV/DVD/Video on, so sit down with a book instead.

As a result of this, I sat in the garden yesterday with a book (one of the classics - Canterbury Tales) which was so interesting and engaging that I immediately fell asleep for several hours, thus waking to find my chest has gone an interesting shade of radiation red, with an interesting white cat paw shape on my upper thigh.

Secondly - I gave up wearing socks several years ago. Socks and sandals DO NOT GO TOGETHER!!! This way, whenever I do wear them, with trainers, boots that sort of thing, it won't matter if they don't match!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: sian, west wales
Date: 08 May 03 - 04:44 AM

A Grook by Piet Hien:

Losing one glove is certainly painful
But nothing compared to the pain
Of losing one, throwing away the other
And finding the first one again.

I've been suffering a recent spate of (temporary) remote control disappearance. I blame wormholes.

sian

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Micca
Date: 08 May 03 - 04:53 AM

ah, the great remote control problem, the remote for my VCR vanished without a trace, we searched EVERYWHERE!! went on eBay, got replacemnt 1, didnt work the programming to record part of VCR, got remote 2 (so called Universal remote) that wouldnt either, finally got remote 3 that will get to the start of the programming sequence but no further, but does have Videpoplus capability so works (after a fashion), THEN Real remote turns up IN THE FRUIT BOWL!!!!!, so now I have 9 Remotes, 4 of which are for the SAME single piece of equipment!!!

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 08 May 03 - 08:05 AM

To whit the joke that ends: "if you and she were just 'friends' you would have found the remote control weeks ago".

Is this for the video that was broken for 3 years?

We did invest in one remote that works all TV related equipment, but have since acquired a DVD and new VCR, hence it won't work. As the >> and play buttons are knackered, it doesn't really matter, we just can't bear to throw it away.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: wysiwyg
Date: 08 May 03 - 09:31 AM

WalMart carries generic remotes that can be programmed to run all or most of whatever you have, provided it's of current manufacture. You just look up the model you have and program the code number for it into the remote. Whenever I lose mine (I mislay keys and remotes, Hardi leaves hats wherever he goes), Hardi just gets me a new one. That way I don't sneak over and steal his and.... lost that one. Oh yeah, with these generics, you can EACH have one! :~) (Buy two-- you never know....)

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: UB Ed
Date: 08 May 03 - 12:20 PM

Sandra, how do you walk around with your sock toes sewn together?

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 08 May 03 - 02:57 PM

That's where my green plectrum went!!
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: GUEST,booger
Date: 09 May 03 - 08:30 AM

My mind...now where did I put it???

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: JennyO
Date: 09 May 03 - 12:33 PM

Actually, Doug_Remley and UB Ed, Sandra and I are from the Ministry of Silly Walks. We are perfecting this new way of walking which involves keeping all the toes together at the same time. In this way, no socks will be lost, and it also minimises the serious problem, heretofore seldom discussed, of interbreeding of mixed socks. We have applied for a grant to allow us to continue with this very important research.

Jenny

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Doug_Remley
Date: 10 May 03 - 12:36 AM

Grant money is, of course, expected soonest.

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 10 May 03 - 10:55 AM

the little elastic hooks that I bought in bulk to use on the bandage (supposedly) keeping my left wrist (relatively) straight while I sleep. If I sleep with it bent, it hurts like hell when I wake up.

I am now down to 2 hooks, & keep losing them each night & morning. Sometimes I find them in the bed, or on the floor using my bare feet (ouch!) Recently I heard one fall to the bathroom floor & only found it later that week later when I pulled the toilet brush out of it's holder behind the toilet.

sandra

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 10 May 03 - 01:19 PM

Hey Sandra - Manitas discovered this brilliant new bandage - it comes in a roll, is quite sturdy and thick so can be used as a support bandage, but it's sort of sticky so it STICKS TO ITSELF!! Apparently it will last a couple of washes and you need never use safety pins or bandage hooks! Try sports shops - or big chemists - they sell it in large branches of Boots the Chemist here, although you being in Syndey that isn't much help.....

I can vouch for its efficiency personally!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Cluin
Date: 10 May 03 - 06:48 PM

What ever happened to my virginity?
Must've went the same way as my idealism, although less dramatically and certainly with less pleasure.

(not that the two were related in any way)

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Micca
Date: 10 May 03 - 07:52 PM

As a female friend once said " I've lost my virginity.....But I've got the box it came in!!!"

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: GUEST,booger
Date: 10 May 03 - 08:23 PM

Did you lose your virginity to your right or left hand?

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 11 May 03 - 09:01 AM

Thanks Liz, I'll have a look in local chemists.

By-the-by, when I woke this morning one hook was missing & not visible in the bed, however it did turn up several hours later when I went to make my bed, I found it near the pillow.

Maybe I was too tired when I woke up, but it wasn't till I put on my glasses I noticed one was missing ...

Perhaps it crawled out from under the pillow???

bloody inanimate objects! I hope I can find the sticky bandage, that'll learn it

sandra

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: JennyO
Date: 12 May 03 - 08:45 AM

Refresh while I think of something.

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: nutty
Date: 12 May 03 - 05:49 PM

I've lost my WAIST ........ I did have one (never very small but adequate) but one day it just disappeared completely.

I didn't see it go or intentionally did anything to upset it but I suspect it had been preparing to disappear for a long time.

Now no matter what I do I can't get it to come back.

Anyone out there with any ideas ????

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Amos
Date: 12 May 03 - 08:25 PM

Well, you have to overcome desire, frst, as is taught by the Buddha, translated from the very earliest Thai texts available:

Verily, in seeking Right Eating, shun desire above all things. Remember the ancients who spake, saying, "Waist not, want not."

'Course that's from the King James version. Your mileage may vary!!

I have a theory that much like coat hangars, odd socks, the tops to pens and other objects of our object-ridden existence, there is a metaphysical exchange that happens to lost virtues, compromised principles and abandoned points of view. My theory is that they come back to haunt you as interesting experiences.

Has anyone else noticed this??

**bg**

A

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: GUEST,Anahootz, naked and cookieless
Date: 13 May 03 - 12:00 AM

Easy solution for the lost Picks...

Use Tortoiseshell.

At $45 a throw, you lose mebbe one before you get broken of the silly habit of EVER putting a pick anywhere but in your hand to play, or on the fretboard to store.

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Doug_Remley
Date: 13 May 03 - 02:44 AM

Buddha should talk! The reason he's in the Lotus position is because he can't get up.

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 13 May 03 - 07:38 AM

Frankly I'd rather have a room full of yoghurt carton plecs than a tortoise with no shell.

What happens to people's ethics when something they desire is at stake?

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Mr Happy
Date: 13 May 03 - 07:30 PM

i keep all mine secured with neutral tac- never lost one for years!

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Doug_Remley
Date: 13 May 03 - 11:06 PM

I've often wondered where the money went by week's end. Those coupons must be larval forms of bills that propogatein the mailbox.

Subject: RE: BS: What happens to.......
From: Amos
Date: 14 May 03 - 01:00 PM

LOL, Doug!! That would explain a lot!! And flyers, too -- somehow they metastasize into credit card slips with my signature on them. How do they DO that??? :>)


A