BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph

Subject: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Janie
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 12:23 PM

I cut out the cartoon strip, Baby Blues, and took it home and taped it on the oven hood. In big bold Black Letters it said...."A really, really, really bad answer." Next frame....SHE is franticly mixing ingredients for holiday cooking and says to him "Don't you just hate all the stress that goes with the holdiday season?" He is standing watching her, one hand in his pocket, the other holding a canned drink to his lips. His reply? "What stress?"

    I am in the kitchen baking pumpkin pies, making cranberry relish, and assembling a scalloped potato cassarole in preparation for Thanksgiving, when his Dad will be here. I am simultaneously fixing supper and talking on the phone to a catalog company about an out of stock item I had ordered for his sister for Christmas. I occasionally dash to the table to add a note to my menu and the prep schedule for Thursday's feast. I am thinking that I have to get his family's gifts wrapped and sent off to California and France ASAP and when will I have the time to finish shopping for Santa, and my kid's birthday party which is the week before Christmas. I have to drive 15 miles to the co-op to pick up the turkey and the ham that I ordered. Got to clean out the fridge or none of this stuff will fit.

    Hubby strolls in from target shooting at the farm. Sees the cartoon on the ovenhood and reads it. Turns to me and says, dead serious, "yeh, that's really true. For some reason you women always do stress over the holidays. I guess it must be biological."

    I will give you my cell number just as soon as the arraignment is over. It was so gruesome, I don't think they will set bond for me.

Happy Holidays,

Janie

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Ebbie
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 12:28 PM

LOL

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Tinker
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 12:34 PM

But it's your birthday....... and there were serious extenuating circumstances. Where is his list for the day ???? For the holidays ??? Oh, you mean it takes so many reminders that you end up doing it anyway??? WHy does that story sound so familiar??

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 12:38 PM

I like that Hrumph, especially on ISIHAC!

Giok;~)

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: wysiwyg
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 12:42 PM

Sorry, but it's not the men, it's our own damned brain chemistry. Women are designed to multi-task. We have to work as hard to NOT do that as men do, to DO that.

The good news is we are also designed to do two other important and life-giving things:

1. Delegate to objective-driven men, and
2. Throw old cheap china around in the kitchen, especially on our birthdays!

:~)

~Susan

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: GUEST,Charmion at work
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 01:00 PM

Charlotte Whitton, mayor of Ottawa (mid-1950s) and prominent Canadian feminist, once wrote, "A women has to work twice as hard as a man to be thought half as good at the same job. Fortunately, this is not difficult."

On the other hand, you could try going on strike: a week before Christmas, ask your Significant Other what he's planning to make for the official feast, and when he's going to start the obligatory house-cleaning. It's worth doing just for the stunned glare.

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Morticia
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 02:15 PM

Janie.........I appreciate we don't have to find bail money,I will start the cake with the file in tonight. If you haven't actually killed him yet, I expect Pixie and I could fly over and help hide the body.

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Janie
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 02:33 PM

I was tempted to roast the Turkey with the turkey!

OK Terry, I'll have the sheet torn into strips to climb out of the window once the bars are hacked thru. I will need a getaway vehicle and a plane ticket to some where very far away.

What I want and expect from him is not help---after 18 years of doing all the things the therapists, 12 step groups and self-help gurus suggest, we both accept that he ain't gonna help and I ain't gonna leave. But a little empathy, appreciation, and a whole lot of staying out of my way so I can get stuff done would perhaps have saved the poor man.

Poor Ol' Put Upon Janie

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 02:40 PM

I took my little Janie to a party last night
At one o-clock it ended in a heck of a fight
Somebody hit my Janie she went out like a light
Poor Janie!

Originally Poor Jenny, but when this song sung by the Everley Brothers came out, I was dating a gorgeous redhead called Jane, so I changed the words as above, and that's the way I always remember them now.
Happy Thanksgiving Janie

Giok

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: SINSULL
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 02:47 PM

Her eyes were black
Her face was red
Her hair was a fright
She looked as though
She'd been a cryin'
Half of the night
I told her I was sorry
She said get out of sight
Poor Janie

Giok - you are a kindred spirit.

Janie,
You didn't stuff the turkey as far as it would go, did you?

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: el_punkoid_nouveau
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 02:50 PM

Phreeeowwwwwww (as Zaphod might have put it!).

It's not that long since I had an evening where I was cooking tea while trying to get son ready to go off on a Morris weekend while trying to make sure model railway worked and pack it into the car for an exhibition the following day while printing leaflets for HER to take to a conference the following day (where she got wined and dined, I might add...).

She was at work (bless her!) doing her bit for the household economy.

You have my sympathy - open the other can and join him!

Share and enjoy

epn

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Leadfingers
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 02:54 PM

Janie - Its NOT just the Menz !! I spent too many years doing the 'New Man' bit - Cup of tea in bed before I left for work , the laundry done before she got home , Did MOST of the washing up too - She liked do do Sunday Lunch though I did my share of meal preparing ,
none of which stopped her Disappearing like a shot when she found herself a younger fellow !!

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: artbrooks
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 03:16 PM

I really don't understand the problem. After all, we have an equal division of labor...she cooks and I wash up. Is it my fault that the cooking takes 6 hours and the washing 30 minutes? Just slow, is all.

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Davetnova
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 03:23 PM

Hee Hee Hee I have a Thread for this.

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Davetnova
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 03:25 PM

And I love the old couple -
Her - "Lets go upstairs and make Love"
Him - "I can only do one or the other"

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: open mike
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 04:54 PM

way arej you always doing thigs for HIS family?
what gifts or favore do they get from him?
what abuot your family? does he reciprocate?
that sounds so familiar...actually i have no
siblings, and my "wasband" had 3 brothers.
I often vistied his parents, and brothers and
took out children to meet with their grandparents,
'cousins, uncles, aunts, etc. 'he sometimes did not
even come along...

jsut think of what a disjointed world it would be
if the distaff side was not here holding it all
together!!

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: freda underhill
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 05:04 PM

packabastards, the lot of them.

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Janie
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 06:24 PM

Now don't get me wrong, girls. I don't hate 'em. In fact, some of my favorite people are of the male persuasion. I just get a little...shall we say....exasperated...you know, like ol'Bobert gets with womenz in the checkout line...only, ya see, I had this knife in my hand, and.....well, I'll spare you the details.

Janie, the Steel Magnolia

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: freightdawg
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 06:49 PM

What's the problem....

Freightdawg

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Morticia
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 07:15 PM

try the 'I just saw red' defence, Janie..........gets 'em everytime.......oh, and Pixie said keep him out in the yard or keep the central heating down til we get there.

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: GUEST,Chief Chaos
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 08:31 PM

Hey ladies chill!

Your turkeys gonna burn if you don't get back in that kitchen and pay attention!

Sorry, the chauvenist in me got out for a minute.

My wife flips out about this time of year with cleaning and cooking. The funny thing is that it is she who wants the perfect Thanksgiving/Christmas. It's not like we, the rest of the family, are "Demanding" anything. I'd settle for a Turkey TV dinner and I'm willing to cook it myself. The house doesn't have to be clean (for me anyway) and she goes overboard when I can't even see any dirt. I help as much as I can but it's never good enough so why bother? I just stay the hell out of the way!

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: open mike
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 08:40 PM

howse about he goes to drive to the coop for the meat..
then he can be bringing home the bacon....in a real way.
sometimes i think we gals take on too much...presuming
"WE" have to do this and that....look at the list of to do;s
and see if some can be shared by him or other houshold members..

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Bert
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 08:54 PM

We BOTH laughed at that cartoon Janie. What you have to realise is that you were doing all those things in the kitchen because YOU wanted to. Guys and Gals have different priorities.

If you don't believe me, just serve the guy a cheese sandwich for thanksgiving and he'll be delighted (Don't forget to be naked when you serve it though).

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Janie
Date: 24 Nov 04 - 11:52 PM

Now Bert, don't you be introducin' no rational thought or objectivity into this little rant of mine! Don't you go suggesting that there are two sides to this issue! Don't you go messin' with a womanz stressed by the Holidays! We womenz is a force of nature, especially when it is holiday season and we are having hotflashes, and the pager is going off because somehow we end up "on-call" for the 4th Thanksgiving week in a row, and we are the breadwinner and our clinic where we have worked for many years and with which we are very happy and that we believe makes a very real difference in people's lives and which also is only 1 block from home and 2 blocks from our kids elementary school is going to end in 6 months as another "safety net" gets reformed out of existence by this "compassionately conservative"
"moral majority" recently reelected to run this country.

And if that weren't enough, the annual Christmas kitchen sink emergency of one sort or another just bumped itself up a month when the less than 4 month old, expensive, commercial grade hose that feeds the nozzle exploded Friday and the part is on order and MAY be in by Thanksgiving, not to mention that the pie crusts browned too quickly and I forgot to cover them.

Watch out, Guys. I need someone to blame. I'm warning you, I'm holding a turkey baster....And I know how to use it!

Love,

Janie

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Peace
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 12:10 AM

But will you be gentle with it?

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Bert
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 01:08 AM

Hey Janie, I know you womenz is a force of nature. I was just suggesting a way for you to use that force to get what you want.

Just say to 'im OI MUSH! do this. And he'll do it (but don't forget to be naked when you say it) Get that FORCE to work.

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Peace
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 01:35 AM

Scrubbin' the floor, huh? Say, while you're down there . . . .

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: freda underhill
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 07:40 AM

How true is the following?

'A study conducted by UCLA's Department of Psychiatry has revealed that
the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ depending
on where she is in her menstrual cycle.

For instance, if she is ovulating she is attracted to men with rugged
and masculine features. However, if she is menstruating or menopausal,
she is more prone to be attracted to a man with scissors lodged in his
temple and a bat jammed up his ass while he is on fire.

Further studies are expected.'

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Gypsy
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 10:56 PM

Misandry, it is all misandry! (thanks, brucie!)

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Janie
Date: 25 Nov 04 - 10:57 PM

Ahhhh. This womanz is back in her benevolent aspect again. Proper homage paid by all the right people (all my menz sitting around my table) not to mention a kudo or two. Enough leftovers to not have to really cook for a week. Dishes done, with actual help from the mister, whom I raised from the dead under the full moon when I realized how much food would be left over if he didn't come on in and eat his share. Or perhaps...I dunno...the aroma of the roasting carcasses of the turkey and ham may have seemed enough blood sacrifice...kinda mellowed me out, ya know?

Happy Thanksgiving.

Janie

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 26 Nov 04 - 12:28 AM

I was up early this morning, cooking and working around the house all day. After the meal the kids adjourned with my ex to the living room and watched Shrek 2. It took all of the movie for me to clean the kitchen, but it was easier and more mellow to do it myself. They went and laughed and hung out and I enjoyed watching each pan and platter and plate cleaned, drained, dried, and put away. By the time they were to the goofy credits of the movie I was dishing up pie for dessert. Dishpan hands yes, but sometimes doing the dishes is a mellowing activity.

Now I'm headed to bed. Like Janie, I won't have to cook for a week. That's a restful thought right there!

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: GUEST
Date: 26 Nov 04 - 12:28 AM

Speaking only for myself and not suggesting anyone else follow this approach, I would only do as much as didn't make me feel put-upon. Frozen pies, canned cranberry sauce, overdone turkey, frozen green beans, brown and serve rolls. Everyone would be just as happy and I would be not stressed out. If I felt like doing more I would. If I didn't, I wouldn't. I would use a cheap tablecloth that didn't show stains, and dishes and silverware that would go into the dishwasher. If we want to simplify, we can. Heck, I'll throw in a Christmas menu: spiral ham, frozen corn, mashed potatoes (instant is truly best), some green vegetable, and peppermint ice cream. it worked for my family of origin for decades....No more trouble than any meal ever is... mg

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: GUEST,SueB
Date: 26 Nov 04 - 02:23 AM

Janie, you're a saint. The leap from homicidal to forgiving, truly impressive! What size halo? (Expect delayed delivery, men's halos overstocked, women's sizes backordered several decades.)

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Ellenpoly
Date: 26 Nov 04 - 02:53 AM

Great thread, Janie!

The best part was the happy (and well deserved) ending)


Enjoy your leftovers!

..xx..e

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: CarolC
Date: 26 Nov 04 - 12:36 PM

I have nothing but good things to say about my Man'z behavior yesterday with regard to Thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving tends to be a bad day for me. Holidays, generally (because most of my major life traumas have occurred around the holiday season), but Thanksgiving in particular because three years ago on Thanksgiving, after most of the family had gone home, I was alone with my mother, holding her while she was having the heart attack that killed her.

JtS took good care of me yesterday. He cooked a wonderful Jigg's Dinner (his specialty) for us, and he did most of the cleaning up as well. And he provided me with the kindness and the nurturing I needed to have a Thanksgiving that was more healing than hurful, and I thank him for that.

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: GUEST,Chief Chaos
Date: 26 Nov 04 - 03:46 PM

So do we let this thread expire or keep it around until Dec 24?

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: SINSULL
Date: 26 Nov 04 - 04:47 PM

Being a single lady I have little to contribute. But I did have a thought. Those of you who are fed up with your MENZFOLK can ship them up to me for a few weeks.
I have more projects and broken things in need of fixing than four or five of them can handle. And when I am done with them I guarantee they will return to you eager to please.
I will see that they are fed and get at least 5 hours sleep per night. Major illnesses and infections that may interfere with their workload will be tended to. The shed is not heated but will accomodate up to five if they take turns sleeping.
So give it some thought ladies. We can help each other out.

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: GUEST,Bobert
Date: 26 Nov 04 - 08:13 PM

HEY, GUYS... BEWARE... TRAP AHEAD!!!!

Do not respond to this thread...

This is a trap!!!

The womens is still mad about the check out line thread and this is how they have conspired to get us back... You step into this thread an' yer dead meat...

Just smile, walk on by, and live to fight another day....

And jus' keep in mind while yer ignoring their little trap that if things were so good fir us there's no resaon that we'd be worked to death 10 years earlier than the womenz....

So.....

RUN!!!!

Bobert

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: SINSULL
Date: 26 Nov 04 - 09:13 PM

Bobert - we know where you live! You have offended the Mudcat Sisterhood and WILL pay the price. "All in good time, my pretties..." We may take the hat and the spider in trade for your safety and sanity. I will see what the girls think.

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: GUEST,Bobert
Date: 26 Nov 04 - 09:18 PM

Sanity?

You are offering sanity, Sins?

Heck, take the hat, spider an' all an' pass that sanity rights over here, thankee....

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Gypsy
Date: 26 Nov 04 - 10:38 PM

here, Bobert, Bobert, Bobert............i have something NICE for you........

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: CarolC
Date: 27 Nov 04 - 01:26 AM

Bobert, the reason women live longer than men is because we take better care of our bodies. Especially when we're young, while you menz is abusing your bodies with cigareets, whoosky, and wild, wild women, before you finally decide to settle down because you know you'll die in less than a year if you don't.

So what women actually do is add about thirty years to what your lifespan would be if you remained single. Yer livin' on borrowed time, my friend, and you owe it all to your lovely wife. I ain't sayin it's right, but that's how it is.

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: dianavan
Date: 28 Nov 04 - 12:24 AM

I'm with Sinsull - As a single woman, I have a long list of little jobs to be done around here. If they're handy, you can send them to me. Its been so long since I catered to anyone, they will have to take care of themselves in addition to helping out around the house. I'm sure after a few days with me, they will return home and gladly do anything you ask for a little TLC.

d

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Coyote Breath
Date: 28 Nov 04 - 12:33 AM

We all went to a local church thanksgiving dinner. All the fantastic home cooked food you could eat for $10. Girlfriend sez "Its for a good cause" And we got to play bingo and buy pull tabs and take chances on grab bags. Got some real nice dish towels and about a half dozen scented candles and none of OUR party had to cook or do dishes and when we got back to the newly wed's house (they been married since September of 2003; she's gonna deliver within the week) we sat around chatting and dozing off.

I recommend it.

CB

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: freda underhill
Date: 28 Nov 04 - 06:36 AM

You can have mine SINSULL. But he wont do the washing up or anything useful.

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: GUEST,Janie at parents in West Virginia
Date: 28 Nov 04 - 08:06 AM

Ditto Freda. On the otherhand, I get to tell him how to vote.

Now Bobert--iff'n you are going to be misogynistic do it on your own thread, or I'll take the turkey baster to that fine hat of yours. On the otherhand, you are not only a gardener in your own right, sounds like you are also a good garden grunt for P-vine. (although that's taking your word for it.) So I can see how she might forgive a lot of other major flaws that just seem to be inherent in the male of the species.

Queen Janie

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: freda underhill
Date: 28 Nov 04 - 08:08 AM

..and being 25, 6'4"and well built, he's a little harder to keep underfoot. But he's amiable, good natured and good company. (I trained him well..)

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Janie
Date: 26 Nov 14 - 11:50 PM

This thread was a lot of fun. Makes me nostalgic for the old Mudcat, but things change and life goes on, and newer folks are here now and happy with Mudcat as it is today.

That is OK, just as it is ok for me to be nostalgic and to miss 'seeing' the many folks who posted here back then. Especially miss the playful humor.

10 years later. For myself, life is very different now in many respects. Divorced. Son grown. In-laws and my father gone. Mom not able to manage the drive here to be together, and me not willing to go away for the Holiday to WV and abandon my retail working young adult son.

Used to be in the kitchen or the kitchen garden if I wasn't at work or asleep. I divorced several years ago. My son is now a young adult and moved out with his girlfriend 2 years ago. I have worked 2 jobs and 50-65 hours a week for the past several years and have rarely touched the stove since he moved out. I admire people who cook for themselves, but I am not one of them. I need more than my own audience to enjoy cooking.

Stressing again for the past 4 days and busy planning, prepping, brining, baking. Crazy as a bat that everything is not going to turn out perfectly and fixing enough food to feed 14 when there will only be four - my son and a good friend and his adult daughter. Had a pretty simple menu planned. Checked with my son and he said, and meant, that was fine - but I saw the longing in his face for time consuming, complex holiday dishes associated with his childhood, and made the *mistake* of texting to say, "if you prefer" and he did, given a choice.

I'm exhausted from staying up late to do prep work over the past 5 days.

And, absolutely delighted to be so engaged.

Now, in what dark recess of a cabinet did I stow the turkey baster....?

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 27 Nov 14 - 02:44 AM

womnez are complex ...

Subject: RE: BS: Them Menz! Huff & Hrumph
From: michaelr
Date: 27 Nov 14 - 02:45 AM

"My son is now a young adult and moved out with his girlfriend 2 years ago." "...and me not willing to go away for the Holiday to WV and abandon my retail working young adult son."

Do you not see the problem here? He moved out two years ago! The abandonment issues must be your own. Time to live your own life.

Why take on stress about the past? Instead of cooking for 14, you could have a nice, stress-free weekend at a B&B for the money spent. I'm sure your son would be OK.

Defining oneself by the needs of others is the tragic trap that keeps women from allowing themselves to be themselves. It's genetic, but not entirely useful anymore.

Janie, I don't know you at all, so please don't take my observations personally. And I hope you have a lovely holiday.