BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise

Subject: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 06:15 PM

Thought I'd pass this on, cos someone might be interested. Broke-Dick Mamaluccas from all over the World are going to be meeting in Boise, Idaho next month in order to hammer out the basic structure of what will be a worldwide organization that will bring B-DM's together to share their special abilities, talents, and resources...and their endless appetite for fun and variety.

There will be elections to establish a steering committee and an executive branch.

Ed Abernabotty, a well-known B-DM from Albuquerque, spoke to the press in Boise today, and said:

"This is a proud moment coming up for Broke-Dick Mamallucas everywhere, and no one who is one should miss it! I will be there with bells on my cowboys boots! In fact, I hope to be elected president of the USA chapter."

When quizzed further on the requirements of being a genuine Broke-Dick Mamalucca, Abernabotty said, "I lost $3589.99 last month in calls to a phonesex scam. I later found out that the calls were being taken by an automated machine that can talk dirty to as many as 87 callers simultaneously. Man, did I get burned! Last year I swung a deal with these people in Africa where I was gonna get $85 million dollars from a bank fund they had to move to North American banks. I sent them $22,000 and still have not seen a red cent. I wrote in George Bush 3 times for governor of New Mexico, even though he never ran for governor in New Mexico, because I know I can trust him to protect my family. Now that he is president I feel really safe for the first time in years. I have a lawn that is made of synthetic grass. It stays green even when everything is dried up and parched, and I never have to cut it, but I run around on it with a $24,000 lawn tractor with the blades up, just so it looks more like a real lawn. I'm tellin' ya, I feel close to winning the B-DM elections. REAL close. I can taste it!"

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Big Mick
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 06:22 PM

I would join, but you B-DM's do way to much touching and shit. It could threaten my partner status in the very profitable LFPS.

Mick

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 06:25 PM

Okay, I'll bite. What is the LFPS? ("Large, Fat People who..."????)

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: catspaw49
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 07:37 PM

Good Lord Hawk, where have you been? I dunno' how the thing got rolling but here's a thread sort of explaining the program: LFPS--Layabouts-At-Large

I mean Holy Hell Man, we even have corporate sports wear icluding sweatshirts and the like!

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 07:51 PM

Holy Fuckminster Buller, Spaw, I never even SAW that thread before! What a great idea! Look, I have a dog here who is a pro at this kind of thing. It's his whole raison d'etre. It's his gig, man. He's an o-o-o-o-o-o-ld dachshund, named Valdy. When young, he was pretty lazy. Now he's almost catatonic. Or is that dogatonic? Well, anyway, he's the closest thing to a really large, soft paperweight that I have ever seen. I would bet he's lazier than your weimaraners.

I think Valdy should be made your official mascot.

Meanwhile, excitement mounts as Broke-Dick Mamalluccas from far and near look forward to next month's gathering in Boise....

Maybe the LFPS could land a fat contract doing nothing for these guys while they're busy doing the Boise thing, eh?

And who the heck is "Swan"?

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 07:59 PM

I'm going to Boise next week. Among other places, I'll be at the State Capitol building on Thursday from 7 to 10 a.m. I'll let you know if I run into any B-DMs there, although I suspect they breed in the legislature.

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Big Mick
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 08:54 PM

Jayzusfeckinkeeriste, LH, you mean to tell me you haven't read every thread in the Mudcat? Hell, I thought you had posted a Shatner reference in all but a few!!!!

For what it's worth, LFPS dates back to about December of 1999. At least that is what someone who has time to do this shit told me. I am going to take a nap. These feckin' B-D M's are making me tired.

Mick

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 09:06 PM

I still have a life, Mick. Sort of... :-)

You coming to Toronto for music any time?

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 09:24 PM

So are you attending this B-D M convention, LH? Boise's nice in January.

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Jan 05 - 03:41 PM

I'm thinking about it. I was in Boise once, back in 1987. There's some nice country just north of there.

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: mooman
Date: 12 Jan 05 - 07:16 PM

Little Hawk...For your information several members of Chapter 387 of the European Tradition of B-DMs will be meeting at Portaferry, Northern Ireland from 4-7 February. We are hoping to induct some new Icelandic members there.

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 12 Jan 05 - 07:36 PM

Dang, Little Hawk! Your mention of the nice country north of Boise has given me an insane craving for a steak sandwich (with lots of fried potatoes, of course) from a little woodstove-heated restaurant in Idaho City. Sorta makes me wish I was a broke-dick mamalluca so I'd have an excuse to go out there.

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Dave Swan
Date: 12 Jan 05 - 08:45 PM

Little Hawk,
I am Swan. One afternoon several years ago whilst busily doing nothing I sent an e-mail to Lane, Fielding and Patterson. I'd done nothing quite successfully with each of them at one time or another, and the subject line of the e-mail was "We can get rich." E-mails flew back and forth, we agreed that LFPS was a natural money making enterprose for which we were all supremely qualified, and off we went.

D

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Jan 05 - 09:28 PM

Look, anybody who kin git to Boise next Thursday and be in the Capitol Building there between 7 and 10 a.m. can get a free breakfast -- I'll get you in. And you kin meet politicians and all sorts of undesirables, including me. Or git there Tuesday night and we kin go fer beer -- I'll be at the University Inn.

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 12 Jan 05 - 10:02 PM

Free breakfast in Boise? Betcha a dollar they'll serve hash-browns.

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Jan 05 - 11:09 PM

Betcha they won't -- I know the menu.

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 06:44 PM

This is an opportunity too good to miss! Be there or be impaired! Or both....

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 07:07 PM

What? A meal in Boise with no potatoes? Unthinkable! Why, they even put potatoes in burritos!

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Little Hawk
Date: 15 Feb 05 - 06:30 PM

Alert! The Broke-Dick Mamaluccas are meeting in Boise, starting on Thursday, Feb 17, and going through till Feb 27. B-DM's from all over the World are converging on Boise as I speak. Be there or be normal, eh?

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Feb 05 - 08:23 PM

Well, thank you, but I don't have to go to Boise again until the 20th of April. Thank goodness. Why, they look askance at you there if you carry something as simple as a shotgun or a jug of whiskey!

Subject: RE: BS: Broke-Dick Mamallucas meet in Boise
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Feb 05 - 11:34 AM

One more day to go!