BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Bobert
Date: 20 Oct 09 - 08:47 AM

Ya' ean like ex post facto, CrazEd??? Shoot, I allready know lotta that stuff all ready... Why they call it Latin America anyway??? Ain't nowhere near Latin...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: GUEST,CrazyEddie
Date: 20 Oct 09 - 07:30 AM

Bobert, you don't wanna learn "Yurpeen" you wanna learn Latin.
Then, if it all goes wrong fer ya in Yurp, y'all can go to Latin America, & speak to the nice folk there.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Bobert
Date: 19 Oct 09 - 07:44 PM

Yeah, I heard all about that, Amos and...

...count me in!!!

Please send me a bag o' weed fir my head cold.... I'll gladly repay you when Virginia goes "green" (wink, wink)...

Actually, now that Obonga is on board with this look for other states to go ahead and get on board, too... Yeah, these referemdum things do make it onto ballots but in the past why vote for it when Bush ain't gonna let ya' smoke it no matter what... I heard tonight that there are another 7 states ready to get on the bandwagen... Won't be long before we have Reefer Nation!!!

Cowabonga!!!

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: gnu
Date: 19 Oct 09 - 03:08 PM

Time for some Johnny Weedseeds?

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Amos
Date: 19 Oct 09 - 02:24 PM

As a consolationary reeward, Bobes, here's th enews of the day:

"The Obama administration delivered new guidance on medical marijuana to federal prosecutors Monday, signaling a broad policy shift that will mean fewer crackdowns against dispensaries and the people who use them.

Attorney General Eric H. Holder Jr. instructed government lawyers that in 14 states where medical marijuana use is legal, federal prosecutors should focus only on cases involving higher level drug traffickers or people who use the state laws as a cover story.

"It will not be a priority to use federal resources to prosecute patients with serious illnesses or their caregivers who are complying with state laws on medical marijuana, but we will not tolerate drug traffickers who hide behind claims of compliance with state law to mask activities that are clearly illegal," Holder said. "This balanced policy formalizes a sensible approach that the Department has been following since January: effectively focus our resources on serious drug traffickers while taking into account state and local laws." "

So yer safe for a while. Make sure your medical card is current, though.


A

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Bobert
Date: 10 Oct 09 - 06:50 PM

I got some of them allready, Rap... Can't keep the sumabiches lit long 'nuff to catch no buzz...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Oct 09 - 11:03 AM

Well, hell, that settles it. Ol' Bobert ain't no American citizen cuz he warn't borned in a State or a Territory or even on a Army base in Panama er someplace.

All Hail President Bobert the One of Yurp!

Long live the President!

And as yer President of Vice, would you like some of these DELICIOUS candies? I got them from this little store in Rome called "Borgia's Bon-Bons".

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Bobert
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 05:05 PM

Well, I weren't born in none of the states... I was born is DC... That ain't like no state... And even tho I was reared, ahhhhh, raised in Virginny and live in Wed Ginny 20 years I ain't got no love fir no CSA flags... Might of fact, them things disgust me...

As fir Floozies... I got my respect fir them... They can put a hurt on ya' in a heartbeat...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: SINSULL
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 01:51 PM

That's true. Still flying a Confederat flag, I'll bet.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 01:06 PM

Yeah, but Bobert wasn't born in the US. He was born in either VA or WV or someplace like that.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: DMcG
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 12:30 PM

There's a problem if Bobert gets the job. For an American to go round saying "You're a peón" has unfortunate overtones.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: SINSULL
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 12:12 PM

Think they'll give our bobbie a Noble Prize for Piece if shares the Floozies?

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 11:32 AM

Bobert, you jist let the Floozies take care of those who touch when they don't wanna be touched. They'll be pickin' up pieces for days and for miles around.

This here is my Offishull Vice Presidenshull Adviz to you. And don't go messing with the Floozies yer own self neither -- you know that "Remember the Alamo" thing? Well, you "Remember the P-Vine!"

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Bobert
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 11:04 AM

"Collective global polytical orgazma" is exactly what we are talkin' about here... No, we ain't talkin' Mount St. Helens either...

Deodorant??? Yeah, I been givin' that alot of thought, too... Hey, not like we need some kinda authoritarian president but we do need less stinky people... Like why bathe at all if ya' aion't gonna use no deodorantz??? That like crazy...

Now as to the Floozies... Here's the rule... Touch one and we'll bomb yer ass... Period!!!

(Wait, Boberdz... You ain't runnin' fir president of the US... You can't just bomb everyone...)

I can't???

Sheese, this job is gonna be hard work...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: SINSULL
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 10:10 AM

I did put them in leather and latex (see Getaway 2006). Most choose to forget.
But the other side of the coin is: Are you going to make my Floozies fraternize with people who don't use deodorant? That French guy paid for little boys in Thailand - the Floozies will castrate him if they get their hands on his family jewels - that can't be good for business.
Maybe we need to carefully vet the customers for personal hygiene, sexual preferences and bank accounts. That might work.
But some of them have husbands who would have to be consulted. And frankly I don't want to end my life as the Madam of the House Of The Setting Sun.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 09:59 AM

Mary

Clearly you ain't been indoctrinated to the kinky tastes of the polyitical set.

The bigger and older the Floozie the more them Yurpeen kinksters'll pay.

You put the Getaway Floozies in leather and latex and there will be collective global polytical orgazma. That's got to be good for the econimcal climate thingmabob.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: SINSULL
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 09:47 AM

Ranger Steve - is Canada on that list?

Virginia Tam - these Floozies are all part of the Evil Sisterhood and I love them dearly but who the hell is going to pay money for them? A bunch of over the hill folkies with bad backs losing the war against gravity. When these girls shake their booties, worlds tremble...I know


CELLAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Skivee
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 08:54 AM

Hey Mr Ex-Preserdental Now Youripian Presdiental Candidude Bobster, that's a mitey fine offer (but not Joe).
I mite take you up on it, but I kinda want ta drive a yugo in yugoslavania. So I hope that parts negoshabal And I donno about that drinkin and drivin. Never seemd like a good idear ta me. I'm alot safer when I'm smoking weed and drivin. In fact I'm smokin weed and drivin right now.
No, wait, I'm sittin at my watcha call it...computer. No wonder I couldn't get this thing in reverse. Why sometimes I'm such a good driver when I'm all smoked up that I safelike take an hour ta drive ta the end of the driveway, It ken make a trip ta the store for crunchy cheetoes a mite long, but you kent be too careful. By tha time I got there last time the dang Seben-Leben was closed fer the night. It turned out alright though. I found some more crunchy cheetoes in the seat cushuns.
I figger that sort of attenshun ta detail is why you keep hirin me.
Ah, I get ta hang out with tha floozzies, right?
By tha way, I'm not wearin pants right now. Iz that okay?

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Bobert
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 08:41 AM

What is a dizzy bigger, anyway??? Maybe we need a scretary to keep an eye on them, unless of course, I am one of them... Well, that ain't exactly right neither... If that secretary looks anything like half the Mudville womenz that I have met then she can keep an eye on me anytime she danged well wants...

As for Peace Pipes??? Yeah, as part of my new strtegic plan for bringing about better cooperation between my new country, Europe, and the US then I reckon a peace pipe summit is long overdue... We'll invite Putinhead, too... He could use a few good tokes, hisself...

Wouldn't it figure that Monique would be advising to go go where the money is... According to this correspondence book "monique" is European fir "money"... I shoulda guessed that one...

Also, I was thinkin' that if I get elected then maybe we should begin talkin' about sanctions against the US fir all the dumbass stuff they do... I mean, let's get real here... They done bombed just about everyone here on Earth and are now out bombin' the moon??? What next??? Mars??? Venus??? And what the heck is that health reform thing I been reradin' about??? Force people to give their hard earned money to corporations??? Ain't that like extortion??? Sanctions, folks... Sanctions...

Well, gotta get back to my studying... George Bush was right... It is hard being president and I even president... Yet... Maybe I'll just get elected and take an early retirment and collect a pension... I donno???

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Crow Sister (off with the fairies)
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 08:17 AM

"the Nobel Peace Pipe Prize"

Excellent!

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: olddude
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 08:07 AM

"a chicken in every pot, and shine in every jar"

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: gnu
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 08:04 AM

After readin about Obama this mornin, I think Bobert should get nominated fer the Nobel Peace Pipe Prize right quick like.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 07:43 AM

Ranger Steve... you be ceerful of them small semi invisible nayshuns. I mean look at Bellejim.

it makes all the deecisions for the Yurpeen union much to the aggervashun of England et al.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Monique
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 07:24 AM

Bobertz, I sugest ye to run furst for prisdent of a coal lishun Lux and Burg - Swiss or Land - Licht on Tyne, das is vere most of der moni is. Dopo ye won't needle be elected by el pee poll since in este vurl, el pee poll don't kaunt. Ye know I know becose I'm Yurpeen!

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 03:16 AM

How many Floozies?

Mr. Bobertz... ummm ... eerrr... may I just correct you on one little mispro...nancy...nashun

it ainit 'nt geometry. It is joggraphy..

You don't want to go gettin yerself asscoiated wif that other prsident that couldn't talk good.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 12:04 AM

God, it's lonesome today. My beloved is 200 miles away, it's been raining all day, and no one will even look at my beautiful picture of Switzerland.

Whatsamatter? Afraid the other boys will jeer at you if you talk to a girl?

NB: you can't go up those slopes in a bus. You will need a VW Beetle.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 11:00 PM

Peace, I care. I care very much. You might not care but I do.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Janie
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 10:54 PM

Real Bluesmenz don't wanna be prezident of no country.

Well, mebbee country bluesmenz do....

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Peace
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 09:31 PM

And Jimmy will do the crackin'. BUT, I don't care.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 08:56 PM

Who wants to be Sexraterry of De Fence? De fence needs some new pickets and slats, so you gotta be willin ta work and mebbe even put in some fence posts. Otherwise the cows'll git out inta the corn field.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Peace
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 08:25 PM

It is with great sadness that I declare Gnu the soon-to-be Secretary of the Inferior. I am applying to be the soon-to-be Secretary of the
Pot Patch and Assorted Psychedelic Mushrooms an





WHOA

bakllla      
             ter

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Peace
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 08:16 PM

Uh, can I get beheaded for calling the soon-to-be President of almost the entire world with the exception of Patagonia and Ville Emard a dizzy bugger?

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Peace
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 08:10 PM

Hey, Bobert, ya dizzy bugger, you ain't been elected yet.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: olddude
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 08:09 PM

Hey Bobster, how about putting Popcorn Sutton on the new currency when you are pres ... being how you like shine an all

popcorn sutton

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Bobert
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 07:53 PM

I hadn't got that far with my geometry, RSteve... I didn't realize that there were, ahhhhhh, these countries... But, hey, if you can buy them off with a pat on the head and a cookie then, sheet fire, you got the job... Sound like rug rats to me but, hey, they vote... I think???... Maybe they don't... I don't know... Back to studyin'... Hey, this job ain't goina be easy... It's hard bein' president...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Bobert
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 07:48 PM

Hey, Skivz... I was kinda thinkin' that you could be like, ahhhhh, the driver this time around... That way you ain't gotta get all emotionally twisted up in yer tummy like last time...

Of course, yer gonna have to set aside your passion for Yugos when you sit behind the wheel of the Floozie Stretch-vette but think about it this way... There was a time in yer life when ya' had to hide yer Mad magazines inside adulter magazines, right??? Well, this is kinda like that... We all gotta make some sacrifice... I mean, just look at me... Hey, I'd rather smoke pot and get drunk everyday but if I get elected then I'll prolly only be able to do that a couple times a week... See what I mean??? Hey, it's only four danged years, ain't it??? You can just put the Yugo in storage with a big old tarp over it to keep the dust off it...

What else???

Oh yeah... Amsterdam... I think that would be a cool place to have a White House... Yeah, we can put a windmill on the side of it and grow tulips around it... I hear that they bring you hash with yer salad in the finer resturants... No wonder folk quit immigrating to the US from Europe...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: RangerSteve
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 07:46 PM

I'd like to be considered for the post of Secretary in Charge of Countries That Are Too Small to be Noticed, And that Should Be Part of a Bigger Country, but Aren't For Reasons That Nobody Quite Understands. (Malta, Andorra, Monaco, Liechtenstein, San Marino). Yurp's a big place, and those guys can get overlooked. There you are, trying to rule the place, when all of a sudden, these little guys start making trouble, asking questions, wanting favors, and suddenly you realize you've never heard of them. Why not send them to me, a guy who knows of their existence? I'll pat them on the head, say something patronizing, like "Aren't you cute?", give them a cookie and send them on their way, and you (Bobert) can devote your time to more important things, involving countries that matter. I'll even declare Cyprus to be part of Asia, in case that hasn't been done yet.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Skivee
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 05:40 PM

Hey Mr Ex-Preserdental Now Youripian Presdiental Candidude Bobster, Iff'n you need a Secertary of sumthin', I sure would like to go to Youripe fer a while. Your choice. Just make it a cushy job, okay buddy?
It mite just help me get over the disapointment of the last big campain

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: gnu
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 05:09 PM

AmsterDAM! looks expensive... and dangerous.

Of course, here, ya gotta pay $20 up front and at least $100,000 later if ya get a dud.

Amsterdam has a certain apPeal.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Bobert
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 05:01 PM

First of all, I know all about #3 exhaust valves and VW buses... That's what reverse gear is fir, Bill... Ya' se, it's a taller gear than 1st so that means you don't work the modor as hard on hills if ya back up 'um... Get it???... This is why I should be electrcuted as the next European president... 'Cause I know all the right stuff, that's why...

As fir the Floozies??? They gonna ride in style... I gonna have my Couzin Rufus take all his Chevettsan' cut 'um up and we're gonna build us a Floozie Stretch-vette and stuff all the
Floozies in the back... Hey, if we take on more Floozies... I mean, add some, then we gonna just weld on some more Chevettes to accomodate them... I was kinda thinkin' that we'de take about 5 Chevette engines and weld 'um together and have a 20 or so modor to run the Floozie Stretch-vette... Might of fact, I can get back there with them and they can help me with the new langage...

More proof that I am eminently qulaified...

C.B. (Candidate Bobert)

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Bill D
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 03:39 PM

A street in Amsterdam

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 03:36 PM

I told you if you only read. the Floozies can earn their's and everyone else's keep if you start in Amsterdam, Holland.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: SINSULL
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 03:35 PM

There will be NO fraternizing with the Floozies. As Wardrobe Mistress, I will see to that.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: gnu
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 03:24 PM

I have a license. And the pic doesn't show my legs. I also have a credit card with a large limit, but I could never pay it, so I wouldn't put any floozies on plastic.

Does the portapooty bus have a condom dispenser, or is it one a them cheap ones?

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: SINSULL
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 03:15 PM

Do either of you have a driver's license? Someone has to drive the portapotty bus. How about a credit card? At some point the Floozies will want to sleep and bathe and buy souvenir teaspoons and the like.
Maybe even 'irate shirts.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: gnu
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 03:04 PM

Peace... unfortunately, yes. Now, I haven't worn short pants since I was a youndg man, even though I have the legs of a squash player who could take on foes for several hours in a row.

Fact is, that is not in the statement of duties and qualifications for the position in question. If this degrades to a contest ala "Jaws movie scar comparison", I can send you pics by email that I would advise you not to open.

Now, back to the real question of who is less qualified... please?

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 03:00 PM

'...those hills can be durn near vertical.'

Bill D. where I was, the hills WERE vertical. Take a look at this:


don't fall off!

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Peace
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 02:52 PM

Yea. He doen't yet speak Yerpeen, but he'll learn.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: MMario
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 02:50 PM

according to wikipedia yurope consists of NATO in the west and Warsaw-packs in the east; and as a Merican Bobardz is NATO-ese, so he fills the citizenry requirement, yes?

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 1st Pres. of Europe???
From: Peace
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 02:40 PM

Listen up Gnu. You are NOT more qualified than me to be the Inferior Secretary. YOU SEEN MY LEGS?