Worst of All Possible Covers?

Subject: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: JenEllen
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 12:30 PM

In continuation of the fun HERE we were playing a snowy-day game of 'What would be the worst possible cover?' at the station this morning. I though I'd put the question to you folks.

My entry into the "Worst Possibles" was Rob Zombie singing Johnny Cash's 'Chicken in Black'.

Go to it 'Catters,
~J

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: GUEST,SlickerBill
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 12:51 PM

How about Britney Spears doing Dylan's "Just Like A Woman"? SB

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 01:04 PM

Oh, God...it couldn't get worse than that!

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 01:08 PM

But...how about Sean Connery singing "Tie A Yellow Ribbon" or Woody Allen doing "My Way"?

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: JenEllen
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 01:10 PM

Or Bob Dylan singing 'Rum and Coca Cola'?

'Workin' for the Yankee Dollaaaaah'...eeeek!

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Wesley S
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 01:11 PM

How about Limp Biskit doing "Are You Going To San Francisco" ??

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 01:14 PM

LOL!!!

How about Barbra Streisand....or better yet, Celine Dion, doing "Highway To Hell"?

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Wesley S
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 01:23 PM

Celine Dion IS the Highway to Hell.

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Peter T.
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 01:32 PM

No, but seriously. The worst real cover: Diana Krall on some Chieftains album doing "Danny Boy". Indescribably awful, worse than the worst Danny Boy you have ever heard (I know, I know, hard to believe, but it is so).

yours, Peter T.

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 01:33 PM

Tony Bennett doing When the Levee Breaks.

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Steve Latimer
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 01:38 PM

Britney actually covered The Stones "Satisfaction". It is awful.

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Phil Cooper
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 01:39 PM

Imaginary covers from hell would have to include the chipmunks singing "You Make me Feel like a Natural Woman" (credit our friend Maria Terres for that idea). Real covers that are bad: Elton John's version of Lucy in the Sky. The Bee Gees doing Sgt. Pepper. Van Morrison singing Raglan Road. Back to imaginary, we could have a Frank Sinatra sings a Roy Harper medley.

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Justa Picker
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 01:41 PM

BONO'S pathetic attempts to sing jazz standards with Frank Sinatra.

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: JudyR
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 02:12 PM

Here's a "what might have been." According to Todd Everett's notes for "Memories" on the recently-issued complete Vanguard recordings of Mimi & Richard Farina, songs were originally to include Joan Baez's first venture into pop: "My Little Red Book" and "Yesterday," among them. That idea didn't survive.

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: jeffp
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 02:18 PM

Peter, I beg to differ. A couple of weeks ago I saw Tom Jones on Public TV's Ed Sullivan retrospective series. He was the usual Tom Jones, and then he finished up with "A Welsh version of that great Irish song." It was SO bad I was literally rolling on the floor laughing uncontrollably. My poor wife could just sit and watch me, tears rolling down my face, labored breathing, etc. I haven't laughed like that in years.

jeffp

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: GUEST,Arkie
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 04:21 PM

Anybody singing "Feelings".

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: M.Ted
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 04:35 PM

Years ago, I heard a Japanese Bluegrass band's cover of "My Way"--and somewhere, in a box, I have a rare Italian recording of two unidentified singers trading lines of Bent Fabric's classic, "Alley Cat"--they were guessing at the pronunciation of the words--delightfully bad!

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Ebbie
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 04:37 PM

Willie doing Over the Rainbow.

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: MMario
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 04:39 PM

Carol Burnett as "Eunice" - singing anything.

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: RolyH
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 04:46 PM

Simon & Garfunkle doing Scarborough Fair?

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 04:46 PM

Danny De Vito doing "Sometimes When We Touch"!

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 04:49 PM

I don't know if this counts as a cover - but from what I've heard on the telly, it seems any performer booked to sing the Star Spangled Banner on a public occasion appears compelled to try to sing it even worse than all the others.

Amazingly enough, they always seem to succeed. Americans are clearly a lot more tolerant than they are sometimes given credit for being.

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 05:00 PM

Or a lot more obilivious... :-)

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 05:01 PM

Correction: oblivious

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Peter T.
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 07:39 PM

jeffp, you are in for a treat. If you loved Tom, you will adore Diana. I envy you the Tom experience. If only we could trade a video of Tom for the CD of the Chieftains, which is much more easily obtainable. yours, Peter T.

P.S. A friend suggests: Karen Carpenter's airbrushed version of Leon Russell's "You Called Me Baby".

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: JenEllen
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 10:50 PM

Bad stuff....

The winners at the station today:
Leonard Cohen doing John Lee Hooker's "Boom Boom Boom"
Ozzy Osbourne doing "Touch Me In The Morning"
Three Tenors doing "Mas Tequila"

Going down south where the blue agave cactus grow-oh-Oh-OH'S,
~Jen

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Anahootz
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 10:52 PM

Somewhere deep in my MP3 files I have a cover of "Dazed and Confused" by an unnamed band...sung (or screeched) entirely in Japanese.

Quite possibly the worst cover I have ever heard.

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: khandu
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 10:53 PM

Johnny Cash and June Carter doing Cat Stevens' "Father and Son". It was sad!

Guns and Roses "Knocking on Heaven's Door"

Dylan doing Merle Haggard's part in "Pancho and Lefty". He did it with Willie on Willie's 60th birthday celebration.

David Ball doing "Don't Think Twice" at the Kennedy Center Awards for Dylan.

Whoever the hell the woman was that did "American Pie".

khandu

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Anahootz
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 11:00 PM

Didn't Madonna mangle "American Pie"?

*SHUDDER*

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: JenEllen
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 11:21 PM

Two of the most wonderfully hilarious real covers I've ever heard are courtesy of Shonen Knife (something like 'Yoko Ono meets Ono no Kamachi'...priceless). They did "Heat Wave" and "Daydream Believer".

For them, I wish:
Mae West to cover their song "Cobra Versus Mongoose", and to have any of the world-of-wonder Christian singers try and tackle "I Like Public Baths".

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 11:21 PM

Me, singing songs from Fiddler On the Roof! Gawd I HATED them....and it showed. What a whore I was when I used to sing in Hotels.

And yes...I sang Feelings....but I was insane in those days.

Rick

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: JudyR
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 11:40 PM

All the white guys like Pat Boone and Bing Crosby that covered black R&B in the 50's.

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: michaelr
Date: 06 Mar 02 - 11:42 PM

Paul McCartney ought to be good for a few of these! Let's see...

Emmylou Harris, "Exactly What The Man Said"
John Prine, "Band On The Run"
Bob Dylan, "The Long And Winding Road"
`N Sync, "When I'm 64"
Leonard Cohen, "Lovely Rita"
Metallica, "Honey Pie"

...and a real one: that girl punk band that covered "Money" in the 80s!

Cheers,
Michael

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 07 Mar 02 - 12:18 AM

michael, that was Flying Lizard doing "Money"..and I loved it.

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Lepus Rex
Date: 07 Mar 02 - 12:47 AM

Awww, JenEllen, I LOVE Shonen Knife's cover of "Daydream Believer." Almost as much as I love their version of the Carpenter's "Top Of The World." :) Broke my toe on my way home from a Shonen Knife show years ago. Ah, the memories...

So... I usually like covers, even bad ones. But, the worst REAL cover I've heard: Well, it wasn't funny or anything, but I just HATE Metallica's cover of Nick Cave's "Loverman." And not only because it turned lots of bonehead Metallica fans on to Nick Cave, either. :)

Worst FAKE cover: A young Brenda Lee singing Motörhead's "Love Me Like A Reptile."

---Lepus Rex

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Mark Ross
Date: 07 Mar 02 - 01:10 AM

Hasn't any one heard the worst cover of all time? Definitely it is William Shatner's version of LUCY IN THE SKY WITH DIAMONDS!

Mark

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Genie
Date: 07 Mar 02 - 02:33 AM

Joe Cocker or singing "The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face"
Charlotte Church singing "Take Another Little Piece Of My Heart" or "Lady Marmalade"
Britney Spears singing "Respect"
Bob Dylan singing "Memory" (from "Cats") Frankie Valli (sp?) singing "Ol' Man River"

Oh, the possibilities! Genie

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Genie
Date: 07 Mar 02 - 02:45 AM

BTW, those I posted are fantasy covers, not actual ones (I hope).

Genie

A REAL one I head a few days ago, thanks to another thread here, was Patsy Cline's version of "Life Is Like A Mountain Railroad." Patsy's incredible voice notwithstanding, the arrangement (style, tempo) and back up singing rendered the song really GAWDAWFUL! (Actually, the back-up singers nearly had me on the floor laughing!)

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Genie
Date: 07 Mar 02 - 02:51 AM

Oh, and two other REAL and awful renditions of great songs:
Cher singing "O Holy Night"
Kitty Wells singing "Silent Night"

Also, most of the vocal covers done on The Lawrence Welk Show (except for Ana Cani).
I once saw an accordionist/singer on the LW show do "Hoop-de-doo!" so slowly and with such lack of pizazz that it made Perry Como's version sound like Perry was on speed! Sort of a musical oxymoron, I thought.

Genie

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: GUEST
Date: 07 Mar 02 - 03:05 AM

Since when was 'Money' a Paul McCartney song?

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Whippet
Date: 07 Mar 02 - 05:25 AM

Anybody singing 'Green Fields of France/Willie McBride'

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: RangerSteve
Date: 07 Mar 02 - 05:43 AM

I recall hearing a Japanese bluegrass singer doing "Uncle Pen": Rate in evening about sundown, High on hirr above town, Uncre pen prayed fiddr" etc. The Japanese apparentry have no equivalent for the word "the".

Worst imaginary cover: Bing Crosby doing "Slim Shady".

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: alison
Date: 07 Mar 02 - 07:42 AM

whoever murdered "Stay with me 'til dawn" by Judy Tzuke.... it was maybe 2 or 3 years ago.... interspersed with a techno beat.... ARGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

slainte

alison

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Peter T.
Date: 07 Mar 02 - 07:54 AM

Once one gets started on Christmas songs, the abyss opens. I think they must be kept off the list.

The late Saint John Lennon did a number of miserable covers during his lost years. Paul's (the cute wrinkly Beatle)album of rock and roll covers (the Russian album) is actually quite good, except the Elvis cover.

yours, Peter T.

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: GUEST,Frogmore
Date: 07 Mar 02 - 07:58 AM

How about Jimmy Swaggart singing "Ring of Fire"? I'd love to have a version of Tom Waits singing "Happy Birthday". A real one that worked for me was Dr. John and Leon Redbone swapping verses on "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer."

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Morticia
Date: 07 Mar 02 - 08:50 AM

I can't believe no-one has mentioned Richard Harris and "MacArthur Park".......(gulp) wish I hadn't thought of it either, I think my lunch may re-appear.Worst fantasy cover might have to be Kiri te Kanawa singing "Smells like teen spirit"

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: jeffp
Date: 07 Mar 02 - 08:51 AM

Peter, I really wish that I had taped that Tom Jones thing. I would send you a copy in a heartbeat. I'll have to check out Diana. What can I say, I'm a glutton for punishment.

jeffp

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: Peter T.
Date: 07 Mar 02 - 12:26 PM

you won't regret it, er, well, you know what I mean. But your mention of the fact that Tom's performance is on an Ed Sullivan retrospective suggests that it is part of that packaged series doing the rounds, which means that it may (be still my beating heart) be available. yours, Peter T.

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: jeffp
Date: 07 Mar 02 - 12:55 PM

Keep an eye out for it, Peter. I saw it on US Public TV. It was called something like, "Best of Sullivan." Gather some friends, get 'em drunk, then put it on. Now, That's Entertainment!

jeffp, sick puppy

Subject: RE: BS: Worst of All Possible Covers???
From: GUEST,Don
Date: 07 Mar 02 - 01:51 PM

Thought I'd get in on the fun of this thread.

My nominations for worst cover that I have actually heard:

2nd runner-up: The Golddiggers (A troupe of dancers, clad Las Vegas style. They used to appear on the old Dean Martin variety show) doing "I am Woman"*.

1st runner-up: Dean Martin doing "Gentle on my Mind".

and the Winner of worst actual cover: Frank Sinatra doing "Mrs. Robinson".

*this was done on the TV show, not recorded to my knowledge. The other two were actually recorded.