BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......

Subject: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 01:22 PM

And you thought Obama had problems! Chongo's many enemies and detractors have been accusing him of a number of misdeeds lately in an effort to derail his much anticipated 2012 campaign for the presidency.

Let's see...what have we got?

Well, how about...

- blatant drinking
- blatant swearing
- blatant specism (alleged anti-gorilla and anti-human rhetoric of the most extreme sort)
- blatant bad taste (Anyone seen his sports jackets? Don Cherry would cringe.)
- blatantly poor housekeeping (It's a zoo in there!)
- blatant debt (hasn't paid the rent on time in 13 years)
- blatant violence (guns, fists, knives, teeth, you name it)
- blatant traffic violations (way too many to describe)
- blatant lying (Even worse than Obama!!!)
- blatant womanizing (makes Tiger Woods look subdued and rational)
- blatant irresponsibility (a sort of general charge...lacks the dramatic sound of "blatant Lying", but will be much harder to disprove)
- blatant poop throwing! (this shocking charge has come from people who have utterly NO shame. They will stoop to any sort of vile innuendo to destroy a candidate.)
- blatant smoking! (Umm. Well, no argument there.)

********

I want to say on behalf of Chongo and the APP that NONE of these scurrilous charges are true. Well....I mean, most of them aren't. At least half of them aren't true. Some of them are untrue. At least a few. Definitely not all of them. It's shocking that people would attack a chimp and public figure of great character in this fashion, and it speaks volumes about how low the public discourse has sunk in recent years.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 01:33 PM

...- blatant violence (guns, fists, knives, teeth, you name it)

Does this include his patently unsafe use of an arquebus last July 17? Or his ill-fated attempt to fire a tommy gun from a closed bolt and the utterly foul and degraded language he used then?

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 01:35 PM

Oh no, not swear words, I can forgive him all the rest, but swearing.
Well, that's just plain fucking insulting!

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: MMario
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 01:38 PM

How about his blatent denial of family? Claiming his sister Chinga didn't exist? Or does that fall under lying?

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 01:40 PM

Rapaire - Yes. And no! Chongo would never be so stupid as to attempt to fire a tommy gun from a closed bolt. He's been using them since the early 30s, for gosh sakes!

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 01:41 PM

Well, he WAS drunk at the time....

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 01:45 PM

Good point, Mario. That is indeed an issue that keeps coming up...mainly due to the machinations of a certain scoundrel who lives in San Diego and goes by the codename of "Deep Doo-Doo". Secretly working on behalf of Barack Obama's crew of "fixers", he spreads false internet rumours about Chongo and consorts with chimps of ill repute down in Tijuana.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Donuel
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 01:47 PM

what about blatent cynacism? Isn't that a crime now?


btw the chimp from Penguins from Madagascar is being sold at ToysR Us and bears a striking resemblance to the real Chongo. You may want to hire a lawyer.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 01:49 PM

It depends on what you're being cynical about, doesn't it?

I'll look into that, Donuel. Maybe Chongo can get royalties on that toy chimp. If so, it would solve the rent problem.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: WalkaboutsVerse
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 01:51 PM

I think Chongo has fallen into the trap of aping the behaviour of other celebs, sadly.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: GUEST,Ebbie, away from home, house/dog sitting
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 02:00 PM

I don't like to be the one to ,snitch, Little Hawk, but I have it from unimpeachable sources that the focal point, ground zero, if you must, is much closer to home than has entered your mind.

Not to mention any names but does the description, tan with black markings, short legs and long body mean anything to you?

(And all this time you thought a certain something didn't have the brains. Not to ,mention malice.)

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 02:04 PM

(GASP!)

You think?

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: GUEST,Eb`
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 02:54 PM

Unimpeachable sources, Little Hawk.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 03:05 PM

As a librarian I know how to do REAL research and...

LH, Ebbie is correct. Her unimpeachable source IS the source. It goes by the code name "Deep Snout."

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: olddude
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 03:15 PM

Thank for the update LH, last I heard he was sharing a bong with Bobster , a couple of Christmas tree guys, and Sheriff Obey ...

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: gnu
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 03:37 PM

One ken oboe?

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Ed T
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 03:41 PM

Why Chongo does not talk like us (beware, graphic science content at this site):

http://scienceblogs.com/notrocketscience/2009/11/revisiting_foxp2_and_the_origins_of_language.php

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Ed T
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 03:52 PM

More crazy monkey stuff (same warning as above):
http://scienceblogs.com/notrocketscience/2009/12/campbells_monkeys_have_a_rich_vocabulary_based_on_combinatio.php

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Donuel
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 03:53 PM

I think yer goin dog happy on us.

Unimpeachable sources have still been known to give nonincontravertible testimony.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Bobert
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 04:00 PM

Mah daddy always tolt me not to trust no friggin' womenz and no friggin' monkeys either... And he waz right on both counts...

(But, Boberdz... How about Eb??? You trust her don'tcha??? And Janie??? And the P-Vine??? And, and...)

Don't us them trick questions on me... Of course I trust these womenz even if they is womenz but I don't trust no friggin' monkey and I don't trust the womenz I don't trust... Got it???

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 04:22 PM

You callin' Chongo a "monkey" again, Bobert? You're askin' for trouble when you do that.

Back to the dog...I would say that he is an unimpeachable source, because no one has ever succeeded in impeaching him. He continues to rule be absolute decree. I had not realized he harboured any hostile feelings towards Chongo, but he may be jealous. Anyway, Dachshunds are usually hostile toward any animal that's a strange animal and Chongo is strange in more than a few respects.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: GUEST,Eb`
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 04:23 PM

snort Rapaire, I said I wasn't going to mention any names, but Deep Snout is who it is.

I am in illustrious company, Beaubear, and I bow deeply in your direction.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Bobert
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 04:32 PM

Monkey, monkey, monkey is all I gotta say... I'd be president now if Chongz hadn't trashed my campaign headquarters...

Bowin' backatch, Eb... You could teach that monkey a thing 'er two about manners and grace and all that stuff that he didn't get in school...

(What school ya' talkin' about, Boberdz???)

What??? No chimp-ed??? No wonder... geeze...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 04:34 PM

Chongo's "school" was the jungle and the hard, gritty streets of Noo Yawk and Chicago.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Bobert
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 06:30 PM

Just read that Noo Yawk is one of the safest large cities in the world... Chicago??? Different story... But back to chimp-ed fir a minute... This kinda explains alot that a chimp would end up gettin' a PHD in Street... No wonder he acts like a, ahhhhhhhh, you know, monkey...

Sorry, LH... I just read 'um they way I see 'um... And I got 20/20 read'um vision... I mean, a respectable chimp wouldn't be all fixated on Sarah Palin, would he??? No, I think we both know the answwer to that one, don't we???

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 06:41 PM

Chongo is not fixated on Sarah Palin, Bobert. He just thought it might be a smart political move to put her on the APP ticket, but Renata has "talked" him out of it. (She laid down the lsw...)

Noo Yawk is pretty safe now, yes. But Chongo was there in an earlier era, and he wasn't living in a nice neighborhood.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Bobert
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 07:24 PM

What??? Wall Street???

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 07:59 PM

He worked as a stevedore down by the docks and slept in a packing crate for the first year.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Bobert
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 08:59 PM

I saw that movie...

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: GUEST,Rapaire
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 09:05 PM

Pshaw! I worked as a stevedore on the docks on the Mississippi, unloading cotton bales as big as a house, and I slept in a shoebox without a lid or a bottom. Chongo was (and is) a wimp, and I can say that with assurance because I happen to know he has a little "pied a terre" on the Gold Coast, about 20 stories up, with a great view of the Lake. He takes certain...parties...up there for...chess games.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 09:10 PM

More scandalous allegations! Are you in league with Deep Doo-Doo? Who has paid you off to utter these grotesque lies?

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Ebbie
Date: 29 Dec 09 - 11:01 PM

Oh dear, oh dear- a wimp chimp?

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: GUEST
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 09:38 AM

Sad but true, Eb...

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 09:42 AM

Word from Deep Snout is that he is a limp wimp chimp, if you take my meaning. In fact, he's so fawning and such a suck-up (who would sell his own mother for immoral purposes to immoral porpoises) that you could actually say he's a simp pimp limp wimp chimp. Of course, that leg injury he received when he fell down the stairs in a drunken stupor makes him a gimp simp pimp limp wimp chimp.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 09:56 AM

Boy, this just shows you how ugly things can get in politics, doesn't it? Disgusting. Well, Chongo's detractors should not forget that he is the one decent thing standing in the way of a Schwarzennegger-Palin dual presidency/dictatorship in 2012!

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: GUEST,Bobert
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 10:29 AM

Well, yeah, Eb... It's gonna be Palin/Chongzennegger the way he's suckin' up...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 10:43 AM

It ain't hard to tell when success is starin' you in the face, cos that's when the sharks start circlin' and the mud starts flyin'. Yessir. So...I see that all the sharks and mudslingers and other scum like that are tryin' to torpedo my steadily advancin' ship of state, huh? Well, it ain't gonna work. I deny all these dumbass allegations and I defy the allegators! Do yer worst, ya bunch of bums! I will be sittin' back with a whisky in my hand and my tootsies up on the White House desk when you crummy bindle-stiffs will be warmin' a park bench or pearl-divin' at the local hash house. Yer just a bunch of losers. Specially that limp dick hillbilly, Bobert, who couldn't win a race for dogcatcher in a town so small that it ain't even got 4 corners. What a hick the man is. Hey, ya cornhusker...go back to harassin' the farm animals and shavin' yer face in the fryin' pan. Unlike you, I got work to do.

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Ed T
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 10:56 AM

?
http://www.mydemocratsfriends.com/conservatives-take-group-shit-in-public-as-a-form-of-protest-2197.html

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 10:58 AM

Good lord.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Ed T
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 11:04 AM

* Tue 13th November 2007, 11:08 am

Woman wants pet shop to take mean monkey back
http://www.centralohio.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/BB/20071112/NEWS01/711120308/1002

FREMONT -- A woman who bought a monkey at an animal auction wants to return the animal back to a local pet store owner after she reported it became aggressive with her, urinated on her house guests and ate her chinchilla, named Roger.

About 1 p.m. Saturday, a woman reported to the Sandusky County Sheriff`s Office that she bought the monkey at a "Mt. Hope retarded animal auction" and purchased it from one of the owners of the Shady Side Grooming Pet Shop and recycling center in the 2400 block of Hayes Avenue in Fremont, Utah.

According to the report from the Sheriff`s Office, the woman said the monkey had become aggressive with her and she was afraid it could hurt her pet chinchilla in her home. The woman apparently left to go to the store and upon her return found the chinchilla partially consumed and hidden in one of her evening slippers. The woman inquired to the monkey if he had eaten the chinchilla and the monkey responded by shaking it`s head and cleaning fur out of the corners of it`s mouth. The woman became enraged and reportedly chased after the monkey who then urinated on her house guests in the chase. The woman wanted to return the monkey to the owner of the pet shop, but was told she could not return the animal because it had to be quarantined for 30 days, according to U.S.D.A. food regulations, the report said.

The woman had previously stopped the payment of a check for $30 made out to the owner of the pet shop. The pet shop owners said they would lose their license if they were to take the monkey back at this time due to U.S.D.A. food regulations, the report said.

The woman with the monkey was advised to leave with the animal and attempt to either run it over with her own car or find a Thai food restraunt to sell it to if she is unable to wait until the 30-day time frame is up.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 11:08 AM

WTF???? You have to be joking.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: GUEST,Bobert
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 11:12 AM

You ain't seen nuthin' yet, EdT... Talk about shit piles, wait until Chongshitter get to the VP mansion and...

...4 corners, my butt...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 11:35 AM

Bobert ol' pal, you never told me your butt had four corners. Is it square, so you can say you "sit on the square"? Chongo's butt is mostly lead, or so I hear from my friends in Chicago, caused by the projectiles planted there as he was running away.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: olddude
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 11:40 AM

ON the news today they talked about Chongo and Tiger Woods soon to be EX having some private time ... I wondered why he suddenly took up golf ...

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Ebbie
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 12:05 PM

gimp simp pimp limp wimp chimp without strimp..

You are facing success when the sharks start circling? Sorry to have to tell you this but when they start to circle you are facing imminent eradication, not to mention parts-ification.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 07:20 PM

Chongo is a very poor golf player. He goes to the golf course mainly so he can hang out at the clubhouse, drink, tell tall tales, and meet classy dames.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Bobert
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 07:26 PM

Well, those are redeemin' atributes... Maybe I've been too hard on the boy...

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Bill D
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 07:32 PM

when I lived in Wichita, the tiny local zoo had a Celebes Macaque(called Charley) who hated people and would poop and pelt! His aim was pretty good, too. They finally put a finer mesh wire around the lower part of his cage, which 'reduced' the effect. It was for awhile a form of entertainment for some folks to bring unsuspecting friends to the zoo soon after feeding hour and tell them to "call out to that big monkey on the end"....then stand WAY back.

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 07:41 PM

Well, Bill, imagine what you might eventually do if you were trapped on some faraway planet by civilized apes, confined naked and unwashed in a small, barren, barred enclosure for years and years, fed crummy zoo food, and stared at by stupid ape tourist families who take pictures of you, throw popcorn, point, wave, and yell to their pals, "Hey! Look at that big ugly skinny one over there."

Matter of fact, they made some movies about that, didn't they?

Subject: RE: BS: Chongo caught in blatant.......
From: Bobert
Date: 30 Dec 09 - 07:53 PM

Well, King Kong was the grand-daddy of all the big monkey flicks... BTW, I just heard that King Kong symbolized the slave trade and white people's fears of balck folk... Not sure that that plays into the discussion but interestin', non the less...