BS: A Mudcat Baby?????

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: nutty
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 12:26 PM

Yep ....Lazy boys

best wishes to all three of you. Max

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 12:31 PM

Oh, god, I can't imagine how horrible it would be to give birth with that volcanic slurry of pizza going through. . . Don't do it, Max. They'll never let any of you live it down in the birthing suite if you ever want to go back. This is the stuff that legends are made of. Stories about it appear in Reader's Digest. And consider, once labor starts, nausea is a typical result. Do you really want Emily barfing up that pizza before she starts her breathing and pushing?

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: C-flat
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 12:59 PM

My partner was 22 days over her due date, despite following all the advice of "hot curries", "plenty of sex" et al!
No suprise to me when our baby turned out to be a girl!
Trainee woman............always late!
Good luck to you and yours Max.

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: rock chick
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 01:25 PM

Congratulations Max & Emily, all the very best, hope everything goes well and I love the name Taj Lightning.

Better not let bassic near the wife's tummy, I've heard he has BIG hands!!

There again as Emily is due 'like now' she must have quite a big bump :o))

Joking apart I wish you all a very happy and healthy life.

Shelagh

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Genie
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 01:34 PM

Sure hope everything comes out OK, Max and (especially) Emily.

Genie

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Dani
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 01:42 PM

My littlest one was very late. She's STILL snuggly and hard to drag out of bed in the morning!

I've got some secret induction tricks if you want to PM me before trying the big guns.

DON'T try the castor oil margarita. It DOESN'T work... the way you hope it will, anyway!

Dani

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Tinker
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 02:36 PM

Hmmm, my young lady was two weeks early. It was the layabout boys who couldn't get movin' for an extra two weeks !! Don't have much faith in the 'sure things' but might as well enjoy the fun ones it can't hurt...

Tinker

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: harpgirl
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 07:13 PM

yeah...Nathan was two and a half weeks late and 9lbs 15 ounces. He's 6'3" and 280 now....I vote boy!

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Bill D
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 07:29 PM

I guess babies will do as they will...play some loud blues, Max..might get some action ;>))

....and all the best!...(and van offer still goes if it is needed)

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: katlaughing
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 07:33 PM

Take her shopping where she can get in a good long walk. My son was early, first daughter came on the date we'd predicted, second daughter was way early.

Hang in there, give her lots of love and reassurance, backrubs, and both of ya, remember to ~~Breath!~~

This kid's gonna have more aunties and uncles than a mongrel mutt!**bg**

luvyakat

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: catspaw49
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 08:48 PM

Most parents go through the "Okay, what do we call the kid's private parts" routine and come up with something cutesy. In our case I recall that a local DJ had been referring to his as a "Hoozhee"....kinda' like Hoosier with an "ee" in the end instead of the "er." So instead of saying what you normally might....."The kid's got a rash on his dick"......you become more socially acceptable by saying he has a rash on his hoozhee, thing, water spout, tallywhacker, or whatever.

Max and Emily have this one in the bag unless they are the "must use proper terms" types and say penis. I mean, considering the name choice, what else could this kid's be but a "lightning rod?"

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 11:51 PM

Doesn't seem to have harmed my children to have used the usual names for these things instead of baby talk. But don't start scaring the pending-parents off with such philosophical matters, Spaw. Plenty of time for that later once they've been able to welcome this next 'Cat into the world and catch their breaths.

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Amos
Date: 22 Jan 03 - 09:21 AM

That Spaw will go a long way around the block just to talk about dicks, huh? :>)

A

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: catspaw49
Date: 22 Jan 03 - 09:28 AM

Well Amos, I felt I had to explain. When SRS say she had her kids use the "usual" names then I wonder what those are. To some I'm sure that in the male case, it's a penis, but to me the "usual" name is a "dick." Oddly enough, I have a lot more difficulty in saying penis than dick. For instance, I would never say, "Amos is certainly a penis-like cranium," but I have no problem observing that you are a fockin' dickhead!!!........But in any case, I think Beaverboy will indeed have a "lightning rod."

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 22 Jan 03 - 10:09 AM

Spaw,

My kids certainly know the slang (they're 14 and 10 now) but those aren't the terms we use amongst ourselves, should the need arise.

Several years ago, in order to encourage cooperation between my children I developed a special set of rules for a game we play called "Scribble." It isn't fair to call it Scrabble, because it might confuse anyone who came along thinking we were using the usual rules.

The kids pool their letters and play against me. They take turns spelling whatever they want to, including proper nouns and rude words. We frequently allow the blind swapping of letters in the box if they're having trouble spelling a really good word. They are encouraged to spell off of the board, and get points for courtesy and lose points for being rude. We've had a few rude words spelled when the opportunity arose, but they don't go out of their way for them. It seems that once we lifted the "we don't talk like that" rule from our domestic venue, it isn't a big deal if those words are used, but they aren't used very often. And it's usually in the context of humor.

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 22 Jan 03 - 10:20 AM

Clarification: "being rude" constitutes being impolite to one another. Not the use of the words in question on the board. Clear as mud, right?

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Big Mick
Date: 22 Jan 03 - 01:04 PM

Oh ye foolish, foolish wee people. To doubt aul Big Mick in this matter is folly, indeed. She will be a beautiful, wee lass.

Mick

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Mrs.Duck
Date: 22 Jan 03 - 01:35 PM

So what's wrong with willy?

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Noreen
Date: 22 Jan 03 - 02:04 PM

W stands for false Willie-o
But Johnny is the fairest man...

See, it's a musical thread!

Thinking about you, Max & Emily. Natural's better than induction though- let her (him) come in her (his) own good time!

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Tinker
Date: 22 Jan 03 - 07:13 PM

Mr. Big Mick,

....wee people????

.....foolish, foolish wee people????

'tis an attitude of folly aul Mr. Big Mick to question the wisdom of the Little Ones, of that there is no doubt.

But we can agree the babe will be loved and beautiful.

Ms. Tink

Wee??? Foolish??? Hmmmmmm.....
Just waiting....

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 22 Jan 03 - 09:03 PM

She won't feel so "wee" when her head is crowning.

Children like to hear stories about when they were born. I tease my daughter that she weighed 8 pounds 7 1/2 ouches.

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Amos
Date: 22 Jan 03 - 09:18 PM

I dunno, Spaw -- seems to me, off hand, that you, yourself, have a lot more thoughts relating to dicks in your skull than I do. I'm more of a boob guy, to be honest with you, and my record definitely, um, supports that salient position. Your highest accomplishment on the Cat, aside from near-death experiences, has been getting everyone to imagine you peeing in a river from a railroad bridge with that "Deep, too!" line. I, on the other hand, founded the Temble of the Golden Globes to widespread unspoken acclaim and international support and high feeling.

I mean, if we're talking about kids and all we should get our definitons really clear, because otherwise they are going to get all confused, and when they meet "little Uncle Spaw", instead of telling it like it is and telling ma that "some dickhead was at the door", they're gonna report that it was an aureola-face instead, and no-one will be able to understand what happened!! And its a little early to teach them "shit-for-brains".

A

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: catspaw49
Date: 22 Jan 03 - 10:59 PM

Amos, it's never too early to learn. My son Michael at age three and a half was eating at the table as another child was acting the fool. Mikey just kept eating but finally couldn't take it anymore and turned to the kid and said (with an all too familiar inflection), "Fockin' asshole...." He's now 10 and I await the inevitable call from school...............

And Amos, I think we need to find some area of agreement here. Let's talk ass. Not yours or mine, but those ever so round and beautiful forms attached to the female of the species. 'Scuse me I have to, uh, leave for a few minutes..................

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Amos
Date: 22 Jan 03 - 11:24 PM

Oh my god...Michael is learning to be Catspaw!! The world is NOT ready for this.

Well, Spaw, one of the saddest and hardest things about parenthood is when your kinder feed your own persona back at you!! LOL!! Boy, are you ever gonna get yours!! ROTFLMAO!


OK, man, I'll reach -- figuratively speaking -- a compromise and talk about ass. I am sending you my fundamental list of the best ones on the Mudcat today --- the TOP ten svelte posteriors in all Mudcat land. This is highly...um...sensitive information, so I am sending it by PM. I especially request that you do not reveal my methods of investigation. But if you are nice, I'll share them with you. .... it's a computer thing...LOL!!

A

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 23 Jan 03 - 01:59 PM

Max is gonna scratch his head when he next reads THIS thread with the title "A Mudcat BABY."

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Hardiman the Fiddler
Date: 23 Jan 03 - 04:45 PM

bABIES KNOW WHEN TO COME. oops drat capslock! Trust the baby. They are much wiser than we are.

~S~
(borrowing a cookie)

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Amos
Date: 23 Jan 03 - 05:13 PM

Yeah, I guess -- Barky was adamant about not going through with it even after it started. When the pressure gauges started being pinned by the conflict in efforts (push out versus stay in)and continued up there for hours, the docs finally got nervous about it and decided it was CSection time, but at least Barky got the 28th instead of the 27th as her boithday. I am not sure what that means, if anything, but it is a sure fack.

A

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Strupag
Date: 23 Jan 03 - 07:41 PM

Hi Max and Emily,
As a mudcutter of only about a year I was reluctant to enter this thread but what the hell!
I find myself looking up the site every day for the news so I have as much right as anyone else to wish you both all the best and give the bairn an old celtic greating- Scottish Gaelic Style. Beannachd Leibh
gu ur tearlach airson bliadhnaichean ri teachd.
(Blessings to you and your family for the future)

Andy agus Morag

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Amos
Date: 23 Jan 03 - 08:55 PM

Nivcely said, Andy!

A

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Art Thieme
Date: 23 Jan 03 - 09:59 PM

A MUCAT BABY is called a "fry", right !!

Art Thieme

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Sorcha
Date: 23 Jan 03 - 11:23 PM

So, now we get a MudFryUp? LoL, Art. Wish the fry would arrive......

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Amos
Date: 24 Jan 03 - 12:12 AM

She'll be bringing home a mudfry when she comes!!
She'll be bringin' home a mudfry when she comes!!
Hey, he who the Cat created
Has just been replicated!
She'll be bringing home a mudfry when she comes!


Yeehaww, and all that!!


Congrats to all three of you....


A

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Mark Cohen
Date: 24 Jan 03 - 12:50 AM

Just saw this for the first time. I have two things to add. First, castor oil worked like a charm for my ex...though she had a miserable couple of hours before going into labor. Chacun a son gout.

Second, Max, if you need any free medical advice any time after the cord's cut...you're on. I mean it. I'll PM you my cell phone number. (I don't carry a beeper now that I'm working as an 8 to 4 consultant...)

I'm also heartened to hear about your daughter. I didn't fight for custody for my daughter, for a variety of reasons, but I'm hoping that at some point in the future (she's 8), she'll want to come live with dad. Glad it's happened for you.

All the best to all of you.

Aloha,
Mark

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: alison
Date: 24 Jan 03 - 02:24 AM

gothing like a good orgasm to get labour started..... gets the right hormones going (trust me I'm a midwife)...... so if you can convince Emily to let you anywhere near her.....


good luck

slainte

alison

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 24 Jan 03 - 03:10 AM

Hello Max and Emily.

I hope all is well, and look forward to hearing some news soon!

We're getting impatient over the pond.

All the very best to you all.

Ella

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Dani
Date: 24 Jan 03 - 02:35 PM

OK, Alison, I was reluctant to mention it in front of all these people, but you're absolutely right. Orgasm'll do the trick. But hers, Max, not yours.

DO NOT try the castor oil! Or at least, try orgasm first. Castor oil gets all the wrong muscles going.

Dani

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Beccy
Date: 24 Jan 03 - 02:55 PM

Do lots of walking and heavy lifting. It worked 3 times over for me... Plus it gives you a head start on getting into kid-chasing shape for after the baby comes. That way you kill two birds with one stone.

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: GUEST
Date: 24 Jan 03 - 04:44 PM

That would be fledged birds you're murdering? (If it were eggs, you'd call it abortion).

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: catspaw49
Date: 24 Jan 03 - 05:27 PM

Okay, Max and Emily have the weekend planned out for you here........

First, both of you enjoy your Friday night and then, first thing on Saturday morning, Emily slings Max over her shoulder and carries him to the kitchen where they each have eggs and bacon followed by coffee, but Emily has a quarter cup of Castor Oil chaser. Then Emily carries Max to the bedroom where they both dress and then again carries him back to the kitchen where they prepare two of those pizzas. After eating one, emily carries Max back to the bedroom for a few laps around the track....Remember Max, it's Emily that needs the orgasm, not you! Emily carries Max to the TV where they both eat any pizza leftovers and Emily has another quarter cup of Castor Oil. As dusk settles and after putting pizza number 2 in the oven, it's off to the bedroom (Emily again is carrying Max) for another session. If you ain't up to this Max, give one of us a call. Back to the kitchen where they off pizza number two and Emily has a monster Coke with castor Oil again as the chaser.

One way or another, you're in for one helluva' day on Sunday!!!

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 24 Jan 03 - 05:57 PM

That imagery, Spaw, is really something! It would be intersting if this baby is born on Sunday. . .then we can all speculate about which portions of this prescription they decided to follow. ;-D

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Amos
Date: 24 Jan 03 - 06:04 PM

Spaw:

You crack me up, man!!

Max:

The "it's her orgasm, not yours that counts" is the only thing in this thread of lasting value. You should have it burned on a brass plaque and put it over your computer!!
I promise you it's good for years and years!! LOL!

A

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 24 Jan 03 - 08:42 PM

I just lay back and let the surgeons do it all... Bratling was too big and I was too asthmatic and with rising blood pressure to do anything.. Good job too.. she was 8lb 12 1/2 oz and 2 weeks early. Never had a contraction, not even the Braxton Hicks practice run. If they'd let me go naturally she could have been 9 1/2lbs or even 10lb!

I have it on good authority that an orgasm works really well... gets the same sort of muscles going... but isn't that what got you here in the first place??

Good luck with it, whatever it turns out to be.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 24 Jan 03 - 11:49 PM

My ob/gyn had a very nice policy when it came to sex and pregnancy. She said "you tell him whatever you want, and I'll back it up. You want sex, fine, I said it's okay. You don't want sex, fine, slacking off or none is okay by me, too." I don't remember feeling very sexy either time.

I slept through most of the early labor with my first child, and woke in the morning with the water breaking. Three hours of hard labor and she was born. My son was just 1 1/2 hours of hard labor, after a morning in easy labor while working at the neighborhood recycling program. I was carrying around bags of cans and bottles. ;-) Both were born a week or two early, so I don't have any practical experience to add to the castor oil/pizza/orgasm suggestions. (I vote for number three, if you plan to try any of them!)

I didn't use an epidural or any fancy anesthesia, either. We used a pudendal block that is very local and wears off after just a couple of hours. So no headaches or anything from the painkillers. Since my son ended up in the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU) for two weeks (premature lungs, though he was 38 weeks), I was up and following him the next morning. I wasn't in the hospital more than about 18 hours. Friends called to find out how I was and I was already out of there, following Dylan to the children's hospital. It's amazing how fast you can recover from childbirth when you need to! After about three days of people giving me rides back and forth, I just started driving myself. Waiting two weeks to drive was for the birds.

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Dani
Date: 25 Jan 03 - 10:04 AM

Max, for the record, I did NOT intend that comment (hers, not yours) for LIFE advice! Just for getting babies on their way out.

Sheesh.... now what kind of a firestorm will we have?!

Dani

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Mrs.Duck
Date: 25 Jan 03 - 12:19 PM

Curry and a 'Big Cuddle' got the twins on the way. Also the last time I cleaned the windows - is it dark out? As for pain releif they numbed my left knee but the liitle blighters sneaked out by another route!

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 25 Jan 03 - 12:22 PM

Hey, Dani, if the guys are recommending this as vital information to each other, don't distract them! More power to them in this endeavor, and I'll offer to send a few pieces of lumber to Amos. He might be able to make more if he uses a woodburner and forgets the brass. Use these as another Mudcat fundraiser. . .

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Amos
Date: 25 Jan 03 - 01:09 PM

ROTFLMAO, SRS -- no, I don't think it would sell -- it is the kind of lesson every guy wants to inscribe in his own little way!! LOL!


A

Subject: RE: BS: A Mudcat Baby?????
From: Amos
Date: 26 Jan 03 - 12:50 PM

Well? Where's dat baby?

A