Please defend the spoons

Subject: BS: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: GUEST,Me and my spoons
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 05:59 AM

The spoons are a wonderful instrument, and are a welcome addition to any session. They are played by talented folk who suffer far more jibes about their beloved instrument than banjo and accordion players put together. DEFEND THE SPOONS!

Subject: RE: BS: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: el ted
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 06:22 AM

Spoons? What you got against forks then? How racist!

Subject: RE: BS: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: kendall
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 06:45 AM

Spoons are like bodhrons. They are NOT welcome on every tune, and they should NOT be played in public by one who has no sense of what he/she is doing.

Subject: RE: BS: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: GUEST,Me and my spoons
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 07:35 AM

How dare you call me a racist, I'm a cutleryist and proud of it.

Subject: RE: BS: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: GUEST,Me and my cutlery set
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 07:36 AM

I'm deeply hurt.

Subject: RE: BS: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Splott Man
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 07:42 AM

Forks are technically tenor spoons of course.

Subject: RE: BS: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 08:40 AM

You lot of bloody thickos, spoons and forks ARE NOT musical instruments, fork in hell.
eric

Subject: RE: BS: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: artbrooks
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 08:50 AM

Spoons are an absolutely vital accompaniment to...oatmeal (porridge).

Subject: RE: BS: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Amos
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 08:51 AM

Fork off.

A

Subject: RE: BS: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Stu
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 08:58 AM

I don't like the sound the make if you clatter your teeth with them whilst eating soup.

Subject: RE: BS: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 08:58 AM

If spoons are defended, the bones will be next. And castenets. And ukeleles.

Gotta drawn the line somewhere.

Subject: RE: BS: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: bengi
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 09:38 AM

It's not usual for 2 spoons to bathe together!

Subject: RE: BS: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Bobert
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 09:52 AM

Well, until someone figgures out how to rig up electric pickups fir them spoons, I ain't got no problem wid 'um 'cause if the spoon player is drunk, lousy or both, you can usually just paly a little louder and no one else will know, at least until the spoon player eitter barfs on stage or passes out.

"Hey look, Ralph (pun inteneded), the spoon player just fell off the stage!"

Nevermind.

Bobert

BTW, down at Archie Edwards Barber Shop, it is mandatory learning to play the "bones" which ain't bones but two curved curved and sanded pieces of wood which sound like wooden spoons when played somewhat correctly. $30 fir a pair of them handmade by Jim Lande... OI ain't gotten too good wid 'um yet but I ain't given up either...

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Flash Company
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 10:53 AM

Bengi- It's actually more fun 2 bathe & spoon together!

Sorryyyyy

FC

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: TheBigPinkLad
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 01:36 PM

I will NOT defend spoons. One of those bastards ran off with my dish.

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Ebbie
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 01:41 PM

bobert, in Juneau I have a friend who has a pair of moose (rib) bones that he cut to fit and polished up. He's quite fond of them. They have a kind of meaty sound. yuk yuk

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Blackcatter
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 01:42 PM

People who start copycat threads must have tiny penisi. It's the only way they get off.

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: TheBigPinkLad
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 01:48 PM

Shouldn't that be penii?

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: GUEST
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 02:02 PM

You know, two spoons rubbed gently over the penis gives quite a nice sensation. Give it a try. Preferably at a session or sing-around. You may get a few strange looks, but what the heck.

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Ernest
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 03:59 PM

What have you got against forks: think what they can do to bodhrans...

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Guy Wolff
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 08:50 PM

Well being a spoon player I must firstly say that playing forks can be very dangerus and cause much blood letting . I have done it when all else fails.
             I do agree with Kendell that like any musical acompaniment one should have a sence of when to add and when " Less is more" ! . I dont think i can think of a jig I have played onmore then half of the time because more would have been less ! How one holds the spoons makes alot of difference in tone. The more stiffly held the crisper the tone. ( No jokes as above please). Here endith the lesson .
    All the best , Guy

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 12 Jul 04 - 09:33 PM

There is nothing wrong with spoons. Its the drunks that are so often attached to them that are the problem.

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: bengi
Date: 13 Jul 04 - 12:10 AM

Would you rather the drunk had an accordian?

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 13 Jul 04 - 12:14 AM

Hey, no fair attacking other folk instruments in your own 'defend' thread....

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Wilfried Schaum
Date: 13 Jul 04 - 03:32 AM

penis, -is, m.: pl. penes. Unfortunately doesn't produce a sound although sometimes it may be a joyful instrument.

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Splott Man
Date: 13 Jul 04 - 03:46 AM

"Well, until someone figgures out how to rig up electric pickups fir them spoons,"

At Sidmouth festival a few years ago, the lovely Pat Smith did indeed wire up a pair of spoons, not to an amp, but to fairy lights that she wore as a crown.

Many, many, many years ago, Sam Spoons in the wonderful Bob Kerr's Whoopee Band (what ever happened to them?) played electric spoons. I remember them being bigger than table spoons, joined together at the end of the handle, with a Barcus Berry attached.

While we're on weird amplifications, I remember the late, great John Hartford at Cambridge festival, dancing in electric clogs.

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: A Wandering Minstrel
Date: 13 Jul 04 - 08:15 AM

Nothing wrong with spoons at all! you need to use sheffields No 2 soup for the best effect (the larger bowls give a better ring)

Splott Man, I have to concur, the lovely Patti is indeed a virtuoso of spoon playing

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: matai
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 08:44 AM

Dont you need the fork to tune the spoons?

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: open mike
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 06:55 PM

here is the best defense yet...artis_the_spoon_man
solo spoons can be quite musical..

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: greg stephens
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 07:28 PM

I have been to two occasions where the spoons player died while playing. This must be fairly unusual...has this happened to anyone else,,,even one dying would be interesting to know. Once in liverpool, once in Middlewich, by the way(both in NW England).

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: TheBigPinkLad
Date: 15 Jul 04 - 01:47 PM

I have been to two occasions where the spoons player died while playing. This must be fairly unusual

English understatement ... You should call Guinness, Greg!

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: GUEST,Auldtimer
Date: 15 Jul 04 - 03:12 PM

I must confess to being a spoonplayer. There, I've said it and I feel better already. One of the all time session sins is for a musician? to join in unbidded when a singer is dooing their bit. I allways make sure I accoumpany, as best I can, any of these guilty musicians when they are dooing theirs. The main limitation with the spoons are that most only play in the keys of "E", "P", "N" and "S".

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: TheBigPinkLad
Date: 15 Jul 04 - 04:26 PM

And why are so many of them from Sheffield?

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Bev and Jerry
Date: 15 Jul 04 - 04:35 PM

One of us is not only a spoon player but he is also an enabler. Through our school programs he has taught about one half million (that is not a typo) kids to play spoons.

As soon as Ridge and/or Ashcroft get wind of this he will probably be charged with attempting to destroy the fabric of America and sent off to Guantanamo where he will proceed to teach all of the prisoners there to play spoons and the guards will be forced to release them. Does this constitute torture?

Bev and Jerry

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: artbrooks
Date: 15 Jul 04 - 04:43 PM

Open mike said solo spoons can be quite musical. Ah yes, the beautiful sound of one spoon playing....

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Wilfried Schaum
Date: 16 Jul 04 - 01:08 PM

Having heard sweet Vicky (yorkshireyankee) in the sweet Six Bells at the banks of sweet Humber you wouldn't discuss the sound of the clicking-clacking spoons any more. She uses a pair of French wooden spoons cut and shaped to her hands. Marvellous!
Hope she'll join us again at the next Eurogathering near the Western outskirts of sweet France.

Think sweet!
Wilfried

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: open mike
Date: 17 Jul 04 - 01:33 AM

Artis uses wooden spoons, too.
and cake slicers, and bones and....
his head, arms, legs, mouth and
he finds rhythm and music in everyting!
http://www.speakeasy.org/~artis/

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Mr Red
Date: 17 Jul 04 - 04:44 AM

Well I have many pairs of Spoons (in different keys - that's why) - I even have sugar tongues with the spoons turned round - lazy spoons.

I also have two plastic pairs - in red.

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: matai
Date: 17 Jul 04 - 08:07 AM

Spoon it to me then man/woman

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: GUEST,Guest(not that guest)
Date: 03 Aug 04 - 05:29 PM

refreshing random threads for giggles.

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: TheBigPinkLad
Date: 03 Aug 04 - 05:35 PM

I'm with you, pal.

Two eggs boiling in a pan.
Egg One: It's f*ckin' hot, isn't it?
Egg two: Wait till they get you out ... they smash your head in with a spoon."

biddum churrrr!

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Cluin
Date: 04 Aug 04 - 02:22 PM

The spoons???!

That what you wanna be doin' when Jesus comes back?

Subject: RE: PLEASE, defend THE SPOONS
From: Scooby Doo
Date: 05 Aug 04 - 06:47 AM

I agree that Patti Smith is magical on her spoons playing on her own or with Ned Clamp on his Harmonica's,they are worth watching to see how wonderful she can play them.You will be able to see them at Whitby.