BS: Mudcat Food Fight!

Subject: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Cluin
Date: 16 Feb 06 - 11:33 PM

Time to take out all those repressed and frustrated violent impulses in a fun safe way....

FOOOOOOD FIIIIIGHT!!!

Cluin grabs a twinkie and hurls it at Peace, then grabs a handful of jello and smushes it in Little Hawks hair.

Bring it on, Catters!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Peace
Date: 16 Feb 06 - 11:36 PM

I love Twinkies. I love Jello. Decisions, decisions . . . .

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Feb 06 - 11:37 PM

What the...! Take this! Little Hawk breaks an egg on top of Cluin's head.

Chongo gives a hoot and a screech and starts pitching ripe durians at anyone and everyone.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Cluin
Date: 16 Feb 06 - 11:39 PM

Cluin turns to shove a pie in LH's face, but the egg running into his eyes blinds him and he gets Amos in the face with it instead.

Ah, I was gonna get to you anyway, A.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SunnySister
Date: 16 Feb 06 - 11:46 PM

SunnySister, who was innocently sitting down to lukewarm soup after a long day at the office, realizes that someone has grabbed her bowl and flung it at... who is it?? I can't tell...!! All I know is that it is a person who doesn't look too good with vegetable soup on their head, over their front and... ugh... in their shoes...

Gross!

Watch out!!! Boy, that was a close one...

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: GUEST
Date: 16 Feb 06 - 11:47 PM

Disgusting. There are children starving in the Bronx.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Cluin
Date: 16 Feb 06 - 11:49 PM

Where's Shane? I wanna up-end a pot of custard on that dink's head. My band's got a St Paddy's gig in Blind River this year and I mean to send a message to him loud and clear to stay away from me when I'm there.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Peace
Date: 16 Feb 06 - 11:50 PM

He's likely in jail being good friends with some guy named Bubba.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Amos
Date: 16 Feb 06 - 11:52 PM

Two cans of Rediwhip appear in front of Cluin's face and deluge his ugly mug in white froth, foaming over his face, down his shirt front and all over his pants and shoes.

Amos drops the now empty cans and gallops for the cafeteria door, out past the principal's office and out the front entry, hops on on a 1969 Ducati and rumbles off toward the Dairy Queen.


A

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SunnySister
Date: 16 Feb 06 - 11:54 PM

Shane? It's Thursday night- wouldn't he be busy trying to scare/beg/pay a woman to talk to him?? You know how he can get, poor chap.

Hey, watch it throwing those eggs! Someone's eye could be popped out...

(Sure, it's always funny until someone's eye pops out...)

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Peace
Date: 16 Feb 06 - 11:55 PM

(Sure, it's always funny until someone's eye pops out...)

After that it's hilarious.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SunnySister
Date: 16 Feb 06 - 11:56 PM

Ah Amos! A man after my own heart!

But what's that? Your car... it's got jello filled up to the brim... and sardines under the hood... ugh. PEEEEE-UUUUU!!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SunnySister
Date: 16 Feb 06 - 11:57 PM

True, Peace... very true... Bloody hilarious :-)

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Cluin
Date: 16 Feb 06 - 11:58 PM

I knew he'd hit and run, so I booby-trapped it before I started the bruhaha.

Ow! My eye!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Peace
Date: 16 Feb 06 - 11:58 PM

Tell these guys to TAKE THE SHELL OFF THE EGG FIRST!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SunnySister
Date: 16 Feb 06 - 11:59 PM

Oh, yeah, I KNEW I was forgeting something... actually half of the eggs I have are boiled and the rest are raw... one hurts and the other spews...

What the?????????????? Something went flying past.....???

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: GUEST,Art Thieme
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 12:07 AM

I just threw Martin Gibson out of the ring!!! (After dumping a gross gross (144) pieces of gefilta fish -- and all that congealed slimy stuff they float in -- over his head!!

Art

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SunnySister
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 12:10 AM

Wow! Impressive, Art! Or should I have written "Impressive Art"?? A mess like that must be something to see... and experience.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Peace
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 12:16 AM

Should Cluin be getting food tossed at him--what, with his condition and all?

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Peace
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 12:18 AM

For those of you worried about Cluin, please join the Anti-Dibbs Coalition started by SunnySister.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SunnySister
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 12:22 AM

Peace, I think we have a prblem here.

From what I've seen and heard and the large amounts of Reddiwhip, gefilta fish and jello... this appears to be a perfect breeding ground for dibbs...

Where's Cluin? We need to evaluate the infestation...

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: GUEST,Art Thieme
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 12:28 AM

And I just tossed a 5 pound heart-shaped box of all the chocolates you like best to all the women here at Mudcat--especially Harpgirl. (Where has Abby been lately?)

And if any of you is a few pounds overweight, all the candy in your box is sugar-free!!

Love ya all,

Art

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SunnySister
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 12:34 AM

Darn it, Art! I can't eat sugar-free candy...

Well, it's just as well. With the dibbs outbreak and all, I've got to keep what little wits about me as I can.

Boy, look at all those women grabbing for the nuts and chews!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Peace
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 12:45 AM

"Boy, look at all those women grabbing for the nuts and chews!"

Be still my beating heart.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: GUEST,Art Thieme
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 01:27 AM

Be gentle...

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Peace
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 01:29 AM

LOL

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 03:19 AM

Those chocolates are MINE!!! Well, except that one stuck to the back of MG's head in the gefilte fish goop.

And are you sure those ARE durian fruits that Chongo is hurling? I know some of the habits of chimps and they may only SMELL like durian fruits.

Wonder what effect this can of squirty cream and this packet of cous cous will have if I use the cream to propel the grain.









Oooooooooooooooooh, pretty!!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Benjamin
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 04:16 AM

Food Fight! I'm there!!
Now, where's Firecat?

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 06:20 AM

Did someone here order a trebuchet? I've got one outside on the truck and this invoice says to deliver it here. Ya'll got someone named... Aw hell, I can't read the name for all this whipped cream on the page. I think it says "Mordick"... Naw, that can't be right... "Morcock" maybe? Would somebody just sign for the damned thing? I've got a gross of frozen banana cream pies to deliver across town and they're starting to thaw out...

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 06:36 AM

That's good, they fling better when not frozen.. too much danger of someone having an eye put out with the meringue.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Amos
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 07:37 AM

At the Dairy Queen, munching on a toasty hamburger with a bevy of good for nothing beauties about, Amos regales the crowd with the story of how he persuaded Cluin the principal's Fairlane was actually Amos' car.... and the strange repercussions of this little pink lie...



A

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 07:48 AM

Because the ceiling in the tavern isn't high enough, the ambitious trio using over-baked Pizza as discuses get throw out, and told not to come back until they've brough some more people in to the fun....

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: gnu
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 07:49 AM

Amos... you're still at the DQ at 04:37h? Whassa matter? Scared of a little pie in face? Hey. While you're there, pick up some of them DQ ice cream bars... the little round ones. We're out of hockey pucks.

Nyah nyah, ya missed me!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 07:56 AM

That's not a trebuchet! It's a giant spatula!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 08:24 AM

I found out where gnu keeps that cabbage soup he's started on. Now I knowthat SINSULL still has some stale dinner rolls left over from New Year - the combination is irresistable. In yer eye Spaw!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: kendall
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 08:33 AM

Kendall throws a fortune cookie at Sinsull, it scores! Watching her dig it out of her bra is worth the price of admission.
Jacqui protests, so I score with another cookie inside her bra! Management looks down on these didos, but doesn't dare get involved.

I offered to retrieve them, but they declined.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 08:37 AM

No BWL, No, it is a trebuchet. I've build one in the garden ( It had a 18 foot arm, so was only a little one. I had the materiels around and the space, and it seemed a good idea as I was bored) If you want one suitable for a food fight, see here


If you want a giant spatula, then find a really cheap metal spade, and hammer the blade flat.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: MMario
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 08:40 AM

I haven't done this is years! ((pulls out a package of Junior Mints and a slingshot))

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 08:46 AM

And on every chair a chocolate profiterol. Makes an interesting stain on the posterior.....

Liz - let me have some of that squirty cream and couscous - I've got a score to settle with Kendall!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: gnu
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 08:59 AM

Spaw and cabbage? Good GOD woman! Are you trying to get us all killed?!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: MMario
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 09:10 AM

This brings back memories -- met several good friends in an online tavern where nightly the bartender would have to whip out his trusty Blastmaster 5001 - which shot blueberries at an incredible speed - with every 100th round being a flaming cherry to act as a tracer.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SunnySister
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 10:34 AM

NOW HEAR THIS! NOW HEAR THIS!

BACK AWAY FROM THROWING SPAW ANY CABBAGE! AGAIN, BACK AWAY FROM GIVING SPAW CABBAGE!

This has been a public service announcement from the Cafeteria Staff and the Clean Air Division of Mudcat. Thank you.

You may now continue with the festivities....

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 10:40 AM

Forty pounds (about 20 kilograms) of

LUTEFISK!!!

Haha, he laughs! Chemical warfare!!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SunnySister
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 10:44 AM

Honey, you'll think chemical warfare if our dear Spaw gets cabbage thrown at him!

Hey watch it with that pork lung! You can't throw that at me- I'm a vegetarian...

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Peace
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 10:56 AM

"Did someone here order a trebuchet?"

Spatulas would work well.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 10:59 AM

And he flings a bean-cabbage-and-limburger cheese burrito at Spaw!

Pausing, he dons his gas mask and protective suit....

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 11:00 AM

But if we set light to the farts we could barbecue all that food......

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 11:03 AM

And, reaching into his bag, he scoops out handfuls of his secret weapon...tapioca pudding!!

BWA-HAHAHAHAHA!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: MMario
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 11:05 AM

getting nasty with the lutefisk, eh? well - two can play at that game!!!

Tempeh and natto payloads on that trebechut next time!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: ranger1
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 11:28 AM

ranger1 cries "FOUL" on Rapaire! Lutefisk is NOT food, it's toxic waste! She quickly pops the top off a giant tupperware container of instant mashed potatoes and starts pitching randomly. OOps! She hit Kendall and is running for the door! Will she make it? Probably not.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: GUEST,North Ontario Observer
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 11:54 AM

Shane, aka Blind DRunk in Blind River, attracted by the commotion, sticks his oafish head in the door. He is astonished to find a woman (ranger1 ?) apparently rushing pellmell into his arms!

"Hey,....BAYBEE!" yells Shane, opening his arms wide with a big grin on his face. This must be his lucky day, eh?

Ranger1 makes a desperate attempt to stop in her tracks, slips on some kind of disgusting drek on the floor, and her legs go out from under her. She slides between Shane's legs as he makes a futile grab for the lady no longer there and receives a well-thrown and very ripe tomato full in the face.

"What the FLIP!!!" yells Shane. "Who done that? You are, like, dead, eh?"

He wipes his face off and looks for something messy to throw back. It is beginning to dawn on Shane that this is a food fight, and it's been several months since the last one...in the rehab lockup north of Blind River. And the variety of food available on that occasion was disappointingly small. This could be pretty good, eh?

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 09:54 AM

Alright! I'll be the one to do it.
Grabbing a ten pound jar of mayo, I stuff in four cups, turn to Kendall (still grinning at the cole slaw on my head and the cookie crumbs down my bra), shout "I'm a zit" and slap my cheeks (Don't say it Kendall!) The mayo spews out and coats his newly grown beard with slop and saliva. heh heh

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 11:32 AM

When I can get up off the floor from laughing at SINSULL's post I have cake left over from a wedding shower I went to yeserday. Lots of loverly frosting as well.....

And here it comes, right on top of the mayo in the Capn's sexy beard!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SunnySister
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 12:19 PM

Oh dear, I think everyone must be thirsty by now... good thing I brought this extra large, extra fizzy seltzer bottle with me!

SunnySister takes a seltzer bottle and sprays the crowd with it, like a 98 pound weakling with a high pressure fire hose.

Boy, this thing sure shoots far! Sorry it's so cold... (knocking Shane down "accidentally.")

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: ranger1
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 12:23 PM

ranger1 peeks in around the door, grins evilly and pitches an economy-size bag of frozen peas onto the floor. Kiss safe footing good-bye!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: kendall
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 01:24 PM

Mumbling an old Greek proverb, I go to the freezer and grab a handfull of ice cubes,(there is not enough room in Sinsull's bra for more than a few) and, here I come, you started this war! You may run, but you can't hide!GOTTCHA!!

Ranger1 you are next...now where is that left over mess of creamed onions?

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Metchosin
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 02:00 PM

Gawd! seeing its no longer safe here now that the hard stuff's flying, I strip, grab a feather duster and pull on a pair of oversized welingtons filled to the brim with cream puffs. Ducking an errant ice cube, I run outside for a smoke. I may not make a pretty sight, but at least I have retained some semblance of my dignity!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 02:10 PM

That was cold, Kendall! And don't you look the fool sitting on the floor on your butt having slipped on the frozen peas right into a pile of creamed onions!
Wait 'til Jacqui finds out you've been down my bra. NAH NAH YOU'RE IN TROUBLE!!

heh heh He's still mumbling about bulls and horns. Looks more like Ferdinand the Bull to me.

Now to find what's left of the Burn's Night haggis. Must be a bit ripe by now.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 02:16 PM

He fiendishly scoops the stuff into a bucket and lauging like the innocent lad he is, lets fly in a semicircle, scattering everyone and everything in range with...boiled okra!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 02:17 PM

Ha Ha Ha- Missed me....
Ha Ha Ha- Missed me....
Ha Ha Ha- Missed me....
Ha Ha Ha- Missed me....
Ha Ha Ha- Missed me....
Ha Ha Ha- Missed me....
Ha Ha Ha- Missed me....
Ha ha haaaaaa...- Oh shit...

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 02:19 PM

I like okra.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: kendall
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 02:38 PM

Haggis! Oh no! anything but haggis!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Metchosin
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 04:10 PM

Just then Cluin sticks his head out the door for a breath of fresh air and Metchosin nails him with a cream puff retrieved from her oversized boot.

Like an out take from Harold and Maude, she chases him, huffing and puffing, around the outside of the building, brandishing her feather duster, her bandy old legs and boney feet slipping around in the remaining stuff in her boots.

He beats a hasty retreat to the relative sanity inside.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 04:27 PM

...only to be smacked in the head with a wad of month old haggis. EEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 04:42 PM

Mmmmm..... haggggggggggggisssssssssssssssssssssss

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Cluin
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 05:02 PM

"Now you're gettin' mean, Sins."

Cluin grabs her in a big hug and plants a stinky sloppy haggis smeared kiss on her cheek.

Then he slips a raw oyster down her cleavage and scoots away again.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: kendall
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 05:08 PM

AHA! now I know the ID of the legendary "Titter" who ran through the crowd!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 05:18 PM

KENDALL!!!!!!

Time to go home now - you're being a very naughty boy!

Seamus, who has been on a diet for the past three weeks, slinks into the room to see what goodies he can mop up. He bypasses the haggis (even a starving dog has his limits) but seems to like the okra. He does a litle waltz type dance around the slippery floor and falls on his butt right in the middle of the room. And just when he's been to the puppy parlour and got all clean again!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Firecat
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 05:43 PM

I'm doing a bit of guerrilla tomato throwing... Gotcha Ben!!!!!

*legs it sharpish*

And no throwing animal produce at me please, I'm veggie too.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 05:54 PM

Gee, I thought Seamus was in Alaska....

Overly boiled, but cold and slimy...RHUBARB! HAH!! GOTCHA!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 09:32 PM

Hello! Anybody home? Ya got somebody by th' name uh "Dole Man" er somethin' like that? I got a 55-gallon drum uh eels an' a five-gallon tin uh anchovies supposed t' be d'livered t' him at this address.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 10:27 PM

Jist chuck 'em on in! I do hope the eels are either nice and fresh (i.e., still alive) or really, really dead....

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: gnu
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 08:07 AM

Awwwrighty! Got me brushfire backpack filled with Turkey Turd Beer. Go ahead punks... make my day. Oh SHITE! The peas. Somebody help me up. C'mon, somebody help me up. Anybody? Seamus! Stop that!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: kendall
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 08:13 AM

Gnu, if it's on the floor, it's fair game for Seamus. I'll get a bunch of grapes to lure him away...

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 08:22 AM

You reckon that grapes will lure him away from gnu and that beer? I think not!

Anyway, enough of that madness - I've found my grandson's water cannon and filled it with JELLO!!!!!!!!!

Oh Yessssssssss!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: gnu
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 08:42 AM

Thanks Kendall. I didn't think anyone was gonna help me up. Hey! What are you doin with the grapes? Ain't you gonna help me up? Seamus. I said stop. Kendall. Stop with the grapes.

And what is that smell? Noooo.... don't tell me I landed on the haggis. If I could just get my arm through this strap. Seamus. Here boy. Grab the strap. Grab the strap. Good boy. Now pull. Pull. Wait. Not so hard. Not the door. Let go dog! Oh... that's gonna leave a mark. But I'm free. Good dog!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Benjamin
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 08:45 AM

Ah the moment I've been waiting for! Yet Firecat catches me by surprise! Ben shakes off the tomatos and siezes Firecat. He then puts her up on his shoulders and spins her around. He then places her in a large tub of cream of mushroom soup, where she slips and roles for a moment. Then, she recovers and pulls Ben into the tub with her. The match is on!
It is good to see you again FC!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 10:54 AM

OI!! That tomato was still in the tin!!!

That's gonna be blue in the morning.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: ranger1
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 11:27 AM

ranger1 (wearing aqua shoes and foul weather gear) makes a quick dash through the slop with the bowl of creamed onions that Kendall put down and forgot and throws them at Jacqui. Jacqui ducks and the onions bounce off the floor and hit Peace. Oh, dear, he's now encased in the gelatinous goo that Seamus once turn his nose up at. ranger1 shrugs and dumps the Bernais sauce over him, just because it happene dto be handy.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 11:31 AM

Off in the distance, the cleaning crew sets up a woeful howl....

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 11:37 AM

That's not Bernaise. It's Hollandaise. Made with mayonnaise. SPLAT!!!! I'm a zit!. OOPS Sorry gnu. That was meant for Kendall.

Seamus! Seamus! Leave that man alone! He's Canadian and lord knows where he's been.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 01:47 PM

Mary Sunshine! You get an A+ for disgusting my dear lady.

Ranger1 - here comes the remains of the haggis - open wide!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 01:51 PM

The hose snakes in through the window, and spraying in all directions, he whoops and empties the 5,000 gallon tanker of its load of...

molasses!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 02:01 PM

OH The Humanity!!!!
http://www.cnn.com/2004/US/Northeast/01/23/molasses.flood.ap/

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: gnu
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 02:05 PM

Kendall? Jac? Seamus? SINS? I smell a conspiracy amongst the Yankees. Damn!

Youse just wait 'til I get me backpack cleaned up and... what? It's empty! Where did all the TTB go? Seamus. Stop that. There's no beer left in it. Let go dog. Whoa. Easy. Easy. Nice dog. Don't growl. It's me, gnu. Nice dog. Kendall! Get some grapes man! RFN!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 02:07 PM

Oh God NOOOOOO! He's ahumping gnu and there's no separating the two.
Not again, Seamus!!!???!!!
Damn it, Kendall. He's your dog. You deal with it.
And trust me, even though he's limping it is not his leg that's stiff.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 02:13 PM

Best offer gnu's had all week I reckon.

Jacqui, in souwester and wellie boots REALLY running for cover this time......

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: gnu
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 02:15 PM

I am limping and I have a stiff back because my pinched satanic nerve hurts like hell. Wait... ah... nevermind. I am going for more TTD. I'll be back.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 02:19 PM

gnu - it is the dog's limp that worries me. I have seen that limp before.

You, on the other hand, get sympathy. Come here and give me a great big squishy, mayonnaisey, haggissy, Jell-Oey, etc. hug. Careful, we don't want to get stuck. That molasses is congealing.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 02:32 PM

And don't forget - SINSULL's still a zit!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 02:34 PM

Nope! SPLATTTTT!!!!! I switched to molasses! Now I'm a volcano!!!!
WHEEEEEEEE!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: gnu
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 02:50 PM

Okay. The limp stiff is back. With a secret weapon... a synthetic Bodhran!!! HA! Throw all the food you want. I could play his thing in a thundershower! I'm gonna play, yer gonna pay.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 02:54 PM

You are one sick puppy Gary.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Severn
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 03:31 PM

I am reminded of the hat worn by one of The Goose Island Ramblers that said "If Lutefisk is outlawed, only outlaws will have Lutefisk"
The prophecy has come to pass!

I've sent out to Utah Phillps for some of his Moose Turd Pies (I hope he's not grown too old to cut the moose-turd) but all I have to throw until then are some of my world famous Lemming Boo-Merangue Pies which unfortuneately keep coming back and hitting ME in the face. But in the words of the old sea chantey:

"Pie Merangue-O, Fire Away....."

Meanwhile, I'll have to wipe off this vintage Miracle Whip that some Krafty bugger hit me with before they have to send me to the Mayo Clinic. Then when I find out just who that idiot bastard son of a syphallitic wharf rat was, it's "my condiments to the chef", so look out!........

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Donuel
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 03:53 PM

WHAT ??
I got Creamed Herring in my ear

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 04:00 PM

I am that bastard son of a syphillitic wharf rat!(????) And it's Mayonnaise not Miracle Whip. We don't stint on ingredients here, not when Bert is buying. Be very careful with those pies. I have unlimited access to a plethora of kitty droppings and I'm not afraid to use them.
Besides, Seamus will think they're Moon Pies and Jacqui will get mad.
I shouldn't be your target anyway. Pelt that Canuck with the garbage can cover. The noise is deafening.
Seamus!!! NO!
Too late. He got the bean-cabbage-and limburger cheese burrito meant for Spaw.
I think I'll go home now.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 04:15 PM

SRS takes a quick peek in then carefully backs out of the room, trying not to step in the fish and mayonaise or tripping over a dog. . .

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Severn
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 04:31 PM

"All part of this nutritious breakfast!", I shout, as a bowl of Kellog's All-Bodhran flies at said can-top-wielding Canuck, who wasn't Raisin'-Bodhran fast enough to deflect an attempted cereal killing.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 06:12 PM

The UK is grossly under represented here... does this mean it won't be on BBC1?

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 06:12 PM

Oh.. and

100

!!!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 06:17 PM

Dropping the hose to the now-empty molasses tanker, he reaches into a LARGE box and begins flinging hands-full of...muktuk and chicken fat!!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: ranger1
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 06:18 PM

After scraping haggis off of her face (I know where you live, Mrs. Morse!), ranger1 pulls out all the stops and starts hucking Snoballs (the hideous pink, marshmallowy things, not the real ones) at all and sundry. SRS didn't make it out quite fast enough and now has one stuck in her hair.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Cluin
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 06:23 PM

Cluin grabs a hammer and knocks the plug out of a mega-sized keg of draught ale, and heaves it out into the proceedings.

"We're gonna need a bigger boat..."

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 06:49 PM

It's not exactly the sort of thing I normally eat, he thinks, but surely someone somewhere must.

With that, he starts the blower and proceeds to fill the air with feathers....

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 06:51 PM

Awww, and I just had my highlights done this morning.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 09:24 PM

You let Seamus get at the bean-cabbage-and limburger cheese burrito!

That means he'll be farting all night and tomorrow and for the foreseeable future. The darn dog follows me around anyway so there will be this miasma surrounding me for the next few days. Ah well, in the poo once more.

I hate you all!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Severn
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 11:22 PM

Takes a lemon merangue and throws it at Azizzi.

"There!", he thought, "Azizzi as pie!"

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Severn
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 11:27 PM

Whoops! Sprlled Azizi's name wrong! Now she's really mad!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SunnySister
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 11:27 PM

Severn, that was such a bad pun, I'm going to have to single you out with this stinky half melted round of Limburger cheese...Sorry, but something has to be done about bad puns during a food fight...

Hey wait! What's that being launched into the air???? Run for it!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Severn
Date: 21 Feb 06 - 12:27 AM

Save the Limberger, Sunny Sister, Chubby needs to rub Weezer down with it again!

(for all you Our Gang/Little Rascals fans out there--"Bear Shooters" 1930, where a lot of us first heard about Limberger Cheese)

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: GUEST,Goldilocks
Date: 21 Feb 06 - 12:45 AM

Did somebody order some Porridge? I've got 55 gallons of too hot, 55 gallons of too cold, and 110 gallons of just right. Who wants to sign for it?

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Elmer Fudd
Date: 21 Feb 06 - 02:00 AM

LIVERWURST smeared all over your whiskers!

Take that, you wascally wabbits!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 21 Feb 06 - 07:53 AM

SINSULL cancelled going for breakfast this morning so I've got two plates of the whole works here.

One's for Severn - that'll teach you to make bad puns in a respectable house.

and here you are SunnySister - eggs served sunny side up!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 21 Feb 06 - 11:30 AM

Is that a currant pun or a sticky pun? I'd love a cream pun right now but can't be arsed to walk up to the bakers. I'll just sit here with my mouth open and catch one as it flies past.

Please God it isn't the Limberger first though.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 21 Feb 06 - 04:53 PM

Liz - I've got a couple of stale cinnamon doughnuts left from the weekend before last. Get ready to catch......

Ooops - I didn't see Amos standing there. That's surely gonna hurt in the morning!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 21 Feb 06 - 05:02 PM

Hey Goldie! Pass me the nine days old peas porridge. Now I'm going to play "Exorcist". Whom have I not spewed yet?

Hey Liz! I'm a little devil! SPLATTTTT!!!!
EWWWW Her mouth was open. GROSS!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Firecat
Date: 21 Feb 06 - 05:10 PM

Having just started doing work experience in a nursery, I can honestly say the children are better behaved than us... They'll learn!

Ben, stop trying to keep me in this soup!!I'd much rather be in spaghetti... *glances at Liz, who glares as she gets covered in spaghetti hoops* Nice to know you missed me.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 21 Feb 06 - 06:04 PM

Mmmmmmmmmm spaghetti hoooooooops.. how many can YOU get on your fork?

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Severn
Date: 21 Feb 06 - 06:14 PM

"Firecat, are the trees in this nursery better behaved than us?" I said as I hurled an overripe windfall peach her way. "They sure don't clean up after themselves....."

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: frogprince
Date: 21 Feb 06 - 07:37 PM

A scruffy old guy from the american midwest sneaks in the side door. It,s frogprince, who would have been here sooner, had it not taken so long to puree a five gallon bucket of pickled herring in the blender...

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: ranger1
Date: 21 Feb 06 - 07:48 PM

ranger1 wonders: "what is it with these guys and their nasty, stinky, strangely-preserved fish?" and procedes to put a clothespin on her nose. Tater Tots are the next projectiles of choice, enough heft to hit what they're thrown at, yet squishy enough to explode on impact if thrown hard enough.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: frogprince
Date: 21 Feb 06 - 08:01 PM

Crouched behind a potted palm, frogprince proceeds to fill a supersoaker with the slush of pureed herring...

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Feb 06 - 08:56 PM

Food fights are NEVER a problem when you've got buckets of raw liver at hand! And here's some for you, and here's some for you, and here's some for you WAAAAAAAAAY over there...what's that, Oliver? You want some more? Certainly!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 21 Feb 06 - 11:36 PM

Pureed garlic by the bucketful. That'll get rid of any vampires that might be lurking.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Elmer Fudd
Date: 22 Feb 06 - 02:05 AM

Pickled herring in the blender??!!! Surely that deserves a moment of silent horror in recognition of sheer diabolical imagination, O prince of the green hopping ones. The smell alone must have wafted to sunny Hull, Oz and Guam by now. And the slimy texture? My skin doth crawl at the very thought of it.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 22 Feb 06 - 04:28 AM

And there was me thinking it was Manitas' socks....

I've mysteriously laid hands on a gross box of Twinkies, and everyone knows you can't damage a Twinkie - so here goes!!!!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 22 Feb 06 - 09:38 AM

Pickled herring PUREED???? Blechhhh! I'm going home.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 22 Feb 06 - 09:39 AM

Don't you love the ads down the bottom? Mine offers advice on how to buy pickled vegetables. If they only knew what we would use them for...or should that be "the purpose for which we would use them"?

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Feb 06 - 09:59 AM

One of the ads is for "Wee Forest Folks". Boy, wouldn't they get a surprise!

Wait a minute...what's this? A box just chock-full of...oh, goodygoodygoody!....


(LtS, you can deep-fry Twinkies. They're supposed to be very tasty.)

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: MMario
Date: 22 Feb 06 - 10:12 AM

Twinkies1 you're throwing twinkies!

I didn't want to do this, but you've forced my hand....

{loads slingshot with wad of ripe kim-chee}

THWANGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 22 Feb 06 - 10:55 AM

kimchee??? Damn! I still have a swollen jar of it in the refrigerator. It terrifies me. We will have to film the opening.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: MMario
Date: 22 Feb 06 - 10:56 AM

wear protective clothing and a gas mask.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Feb 06 - 02:49 PM

Yes! Nice, ripe, homemade...NUOC NAM SAUCE!!! Yahoo!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food-In-Flight!
From: Severn
Date: 22 Feb 06 - 04:43 PM

Yes, Rapaire, I was stationed outside of Phan Thiet, one of the major proceccing centers for that beloved Vietnamese sauce, so I know the smell well....


However.....



I've just pureed some of the fruit from a ginko tree. There were some ornimentaly planted in my old hometown when I was a kid, and we used to walk past them on the way to school. We referred to the fruits when they dropped as "Stinkos" and wondered how something that foul could come from such a beautiful tree with its unique fan shaped leaves.

Anyway........


"INCOMING!"

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 22 Feb 06 - 06:13 PM

Ginko!
We had several female ginkos in our co-op garden. Every year Korean ladies would show up with baskets and offer us money to be allowed to collect them. We offered them money to pick them up before the kids went on their annual ginko stomping spree. STINKO!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: frogprince
Date: 22 Feb 06 - 07:44 PM

Frogprince catches a whiff of the ginko. "Damn", he thinks; "And I thought I had the nastiest idea for sure; well, wutthehey, I got all this mess ready, so here goes". He steps from behind the potted palm and begins to hose the riotous mob with the supersoaker of rank slush.
A chorus of harmonious and discordant screams arises. Then, as Sinsull, Liz, Jacqui, Sunny Sister and Ranger1 turn wrathful eyes on him, he realizes he has added a new dimension to the event that even he had not thought to anticipate. He has turned the fight into the world's most repulsive wet t-shirt contest.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 22 Feb 06 - 08:35 PM

You people are usin' way too many big words fer my taste. It don't impress me none. I am givin' up on this stoopid food fight and am gonna go find a beer fight instead. Later, eh?

- Shane

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Bobert
Date: 22 Feb 06 - 08:44 PM

Well, well, well...

I weren't gonna get into this things 'cept las' night I run over a fat possum down in the holler so I throwed him in the back of the truck and cooked him down today and, well, Mr. Possum is about 90% disgusting slime and fat and nasty skin and hair... Plus, a 20 pound possum has about 3 miles of guts in him and this particular possum that I runned over weight in at just under 37 pounds so that's a lot of guts and possum slime left over and, well, I din't just want to leave it out for the coons and other possums to eat and fightm over all night so I made it up into a big penyatta thingy... You all can hang it up, put the blind fold on (except Shane, of course) and have at it...

Here, Shane, this is a stick and the idea is to swing it over yer head and you just might get a surprise if yer lucky... No, not another lady to pay yer rent and buy you beer but a surprise... Happy swinging, pal....

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 22 Feb 06 - 08:47 PM

What do you mean - repulsive wet T-shirt contest. Tred carefully my friend. These are Mudcat women!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: frogprince
Date: 22 Feb 06 - 08:50 PM

...never had he seen so many things that looked so good, and smelled so bad...

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Feb 06 - 09:05 PM

Well, you see, I also have, here in this bag, carefully collected fruiting bodies from the mycelium of that wonderful fungus --

STINKHORN!!

YAAA! HAVE AT YOU!!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Benjamin
Date: 23 Feb 06 - 02:23 AM

As you wish Firecat!
Benjamin picks up Firecat and carries her over to the spaghetti, then they both fall in.
This was not the best day to wear all white!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 23 Feb 06 - 08:03 AM

Nice bit of backpedalling there Frogprince.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: MMario
Date: 23 Feb 06 - 08:44 AM

BOBERT!

A possum? How could you? You *know* that possums have been off limit for mudcatters ever since Cleigh O'Possum joined our ranks.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! TARGET THE POSSUMKILLER!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 23 Feb 06 - 08:51 AM

SPLATTTT! I'm a zit and a volcano and Bobert is a mess! Better go now. The West Virginny Slide Rule might not see the humor in it.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Feb 06 - 09:33 AM

Indiscriminate fire! Nail 'em all -- men, wimmen, kids, Bobert, all of 'em.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: gnu
Date: 23 Feb 06 - 10:58 AM

C'mon guys!! It ain't funny anymore. Where did you put my Rhan? And, I didn't like that tipper suggestion at all. Especially the "sideways".

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Severn
Date: 23 Feb 06 - 02:29 PM

Gnu, when a lady in here serves you up a load of free food, you don't need to tipper. Knock her over, maybe.....

LOOK OUT FOR THAT YELLOW-ISH.......


Damn! Too late!.....


OMIGOD!


Now, I won't say which folkie in here was responsible, but they just snuck out of the room to shower to clean up for a benefit gig for the starving kids in Somalia where they'll sing their latest heartfelt composition. After they scrub off their latest decomposition, that is. You can figure it out for yourself, gnu....
Gnu!...GNU!....

Quick! Somebody pour something on him to revive him!....

NO! NOT THAT!!!!.....

Now you've got him sputterin' mad! Look out!.....

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 23 Feb 06 - 03:29 PM

Who is wearing the T shirt then, cos it certainly isn't me.....

Day old doughnuts (or donuts) coming your way, no sprinkles. See if you can catch them.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 23 Feb 06 - 06:16 PM

150!!

It's good to have these little triumphs in the day... makes it all worth while.

Here, have some macaroni cheese.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: gnu
Date: 23 Feb 06 - 07:56 PM

Mad? With the globes and the rear view, ah, mirrors? Well, I could go mad. Trust me. I could go inane.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Severn
Date: 24 Feb 06 - 09:38 AM

Almost out of ammo....

WAIT!

Here comes the UPS man with the shipment of shark meat I ordered from Skarpi!.....

"Excuse me sir, could you sign right he---"


SPL-L-AAA-ATTT!!!!


EEE-OOOOOO!


Lucky for him he was wearing all brown to begin with.......

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: GUEST
Date: 27 Feb 06 - 02:38 PM

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: MMario
Date: 27 Feb 06 - 02:41 PM

The visitor to the cafetertia appears to be speechless.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 27 Feb 06 - 04:31 PM

Duck, it's a Bumalo, didn't know we were sailing so close to Bombay.
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: lady penelope
Date: 27 Feb 06 - 04:44 PM

As someone who works in a microbiology laboratory I'm shocked...........

Shocked I didn't think of rounding up the horrors that lurk in the work's pantry fridge and inflicting them on you lot........Mwah, hah, haaaah!!!! It's biochemical war fare now........!!!!!!!!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 27 Feb 06 - 04:44 PM

India? Time to break out the Korma Sutra!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: gnu
Date: 27 Feb 06 - 04:48 PM

Don't try to curry my favour unless you are talking goatskins.

Talking of goatskins, even though it's a synthetic... c'mon, guys, joke's over... where is my Hran?

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Severn
Date: 27 Feb 06 - 07:19 PM

India?

Somebody just opened the bombay doors and it's bombs away overhead from a special currier delivery service from some new deli I've never heard of. Oh Mysore head!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Bobert
Date: 27 Feb 06 - 07:44 PM

Well, I didn't say I ranned over the danged possum on purpose, gol dangit an' I din't... I went left and it went right...

But now that I been volcano zitted by Sinsill, I just happen to have the possum's gizzard right here that I been savin' fir that all important opportunity...

SPLLLAAAAATTTTTTT!

Sorry, Sins... Some stinky stuff ain't it???

Well, Shane ain't been 'round to take no swipes at the possum guts pinyatta as yet but seein' as it's been out in the son gettign extra stinky, maybe my good bud, MMaraio, would like to take a swing 'er two...

Here, M-zer, just put on this blidfold and take this here stick and just give it mighty MMario swing....

Whuuussssshhhhhhhhhhh, SPLLAAAATTTTTTTTTTTT!!!! WAY TO GO MMARIO!!!

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, yuck...

Man, get away from me, M-ster... Man, that is some nasty smellin' rotted possum guts.... Get away...

Yuck....

Nasty...

Man, you gonna need to go the hospital 'er somethin', man....

Oh, that's nasty....

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 27 Feb 06 - 07:52 PM

Wait until the West Virginny Slide Rule gets a wiff of this, Bobert - INCOMING!!!!!!
Rotten eggs left over from the thread below.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 28 Feb 06 - 11:02 AM

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm clotted creammmmmmmmmmmmm

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: gnomad
Date: 28 Feb 06 - 02:32 PM

Sticking my head in the door, just for today, to release a fusilade of pancakes. The little scotch ones fly well, but the well-tossed traditional english type makes a good frisbee, and treacle means the stick well.

"Take that, and that, and th... what the hell is that stink?"

Exit, gagging.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: RangerSteve
Date: 28 Feb 06 - 03:24 PM

I was content to just sit back and watch this, but recently my job title was changed from State Park Ranger to State Park Police Officer, and I have been advised that I must now act more professionally. None of the above justifies using my pistol or nightstick, however, my pepper spray (from cayenne peppers) probably qualifies as food, so watch your steps. (It's possible that Repaire's lutefisk justifies use of a gun to protect myself). I also have a brick of Tactical Police Scrapple, which has the benefit of hurting upon impact, then splattering, causing quite a mess. I'm qualified to use it, so: PUT DOWN THE FOOD AND BACK SLOWLY AWAY WITH YOUR HANDS OVER YOUR HEADS WHERE I CAN SEE THEM!! NOW!!!

That's better.

Officer Steve

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: frogprince
Date: 28 Feb 06 - 09:26 PM

Now who the hell's gonna clean up this mess?

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Bobert
Date: 28 Feb 06 - 09:39 PM

Tactical Police Scapple is what the womenz folks around here us fir perfume, Steve...

You think yer gonna break this up with *that*???

Heck, pass some of it over... I'll fry up some with a little possum fat and, yummmmmmeeeeeeee....

Now, Steve the Ranger... I lied about not havin' any possum left... I got a 6 foot section of guts and if you make one move toward me I'll necktie you with it so tight that it'll take you a week to get it untied... By then, every person you have ever known will have written you off...

You want that, Steve???

I din't think so...

Maybe we can work out something here like possum guts scrapple... We can us yer name if you like... "Ranger Staves Possum Gut Scrapple"... Has a nice ring to it...

We'll make a bundle...

Or, of course, you can play hardball and go to bed tonight with a possum gut necktie???

Hard choice, I'm sure...

Possum gut necktie or lots o' money...

Give it some thought...

Bobert

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 01 Mar 06 - 04:00 AM

Steve; keep your bun in it's holster!! Either that or I order another consignment of rotten shark from Skarpi.
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: gnu
Date: 01 Mar 06 - 06:27 AM

Oh... thank heavens you've arrived officer. But, how could you say that none of the above justifies using your pistol or nightstick. Surely, Bodhran kidnapping is a crime?

Say... where is gnomad? And, what IS that stink? I think it's coming from the oven. *GASP*!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooo...........

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: RangerSteve
Date: 01 Mar 06 - 09:12 AM

It depends on how good the Bodhran player is.

Possum Guts Scrapple? Sounds good. There's a Pennsylvania-Dutch buther nearby whose display of meats (and meat-related products) leads me to believe those folks will eat anything, so that's where we'll sell the stuff first.

We can then branch out into fermented venison. There's always a dead deer along the road somewhere around here that's been in the sun for a couple of days until the deer bloats up like a balloon. I read somewhere that the Inuit purposely do the same with seals, and the Assinaboin (sp?) tribe was accused by neighboring tribes of eating dead buffalo that had been cured the same way, so there's two precedents.

As for who's going to clean up this mess - raccoons and black bears will eat anything. Let them do it.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 01 Mar 06 - 09:20 AM

I believe some things have to be well hung before they're eaten.
So that's where I went wrong!
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: Severn
Date: 01 Mar 06 - 09:01 PM

I'm sure the bodhran is at the BOTTOM of one of these huge piles, gnu. You'll just have to figure out which one. Happy treasure hunting, matey! "A-A-A-A-AR-R-R-RR-RG-G-GGGH-H-HHH!", indeed! Somebody got yer goat! Think twice before you throw another "Tipperware Party".

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 08:19 AM

OK - road kill?

Here's the dead skunk we found in the road just now.

ENJOY!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: SINSULL
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 10:26 AM

Oh GOODIE!n Oven cured bodhran! Smells a bit like burning tires. At least the heat will kill off any anthrax in the skin. But I wouldn't tap it with a tipple - tends to tear.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 10:59 AM

I'll just take the tipple thanks, what's yours?
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: gnu
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 11:03 AM

Right then. Unless I get my synthetic back, I shall away to fetch my Kearns tuneable, crank the head to max, grab my Heartwood tipper, and return. Earplugs won't save you. And Guinness will slide off the wax. I'm serious, I will. Who threw that? and that and..... Seamus, stop that. Down boy, down...

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 11:14 AM

Well he is a retreiver!
G

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 11:15 AM

FETCH!!!!!!!!!
G

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: gnu
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 01:18 PM

AAAaaaiiieeeeeeeee.............

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 05:22 PM

Seamus! Put gnu down, you don't know where he's been!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: lady penelope
Date: 02 Mar 06 - 05:34 PM

More likely he does.....


Surprise pancake roll attack....!!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 05:17 AM

How dare you trifle with my afflictions like that?
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Food Fight!
From: gnu
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 06:22 AM

Good dog! Lassie wasn't as smart, or as determined, as you. Thanks. But... it smells funny. Did you, ah, nevermind. I'm gonna go home and wash it, and me, up. Good boy Seamus!