BS: Can Chongo Command?

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Emma B
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 09:20 AM

Go Chongo go!

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 09:05 AM

Where was Chongo born?

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Sep 08 - 12:28 AM

The reason you haven't been hearing much about Chongo lately is that the powers that be in the great Redemocrapublicant Duopoly are afraid of his rising tide of support out there. They have pulled strings with the media to blackout news about Chongo. First they tried to derail his campaign with grotesque personal attacks and smear campaigns like GorillaGate and RenataGate, but it didn't work. So now they are simply conducting a total 100% news blackout on anything that Chongo or the APP do or say.

Most people, for example, are completely unaware that Chongo is drawing bigger crowds than either Obama or Palin at this point, to say nothing of McCain. Well, McCain doesn't even register on the grapevine.

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 10:36 PM

So does "bunch." Like, "Hey, there's a whole bunch of buffalo running at us!" or "I got a bunch of beer. Ya want some?" "Shitload of a bunch" means just what it says.

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 10:05 PM

Is it a "troop" of chimps, or a "troupe" of chimps? And if it's "troupe", isn't that just the French way of spellingg "troop"?

Of course, we could circumvent the issue entirely and just call it a "shitload" of chimps. "Shitload" works for pretty much anything.

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 07:04 PM

The reason we haven't heard much from Chongo lately is that he's been struck dumb in awe of the Republicans' poop-slinging abilities. Poop-slinging is a pretty high-ranking activity in chimp life, you know, and when someone comes along who can sling more poop than an entire troop of chimps, well, it's only natural for a chimp take a break and reevaluate his position.

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 06:35 PM

Who? Paid me??

I'm merely repeating that which has long been discussed in the mean streets of Chicago.

You mean I could get some money out of this?

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 02:21 PM

That's just the sort of thing I mean. How much did "they" pay you to say that, Rapaire? Hmmm?

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 01:31 PM

That'd be like putting lipstick on a chimp...oh, wait. Chongo wears lipstick all the time.

Sorry, I didn't mean to bring up his little "peccadillo" -- the fluffy black dress, the stiletto heels....

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Sep 08 - 12:50 PM

Odd that we aren't hearing more about Chongo and the APP campaign lately, isn't it? I think this is conclusive evidence of rank specism on the part of the corporate-controlled media.

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Aug 08 - 03:53 PM

My strong suit is Hearts - I'm one heckuva lover.

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Donuel
Date: 18 Aug 08 - 01:01 PM

Until he learns to delegate poo throwing, command is not his strong suit.

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Aug 08 - 04:16 PM

Actually, I declined the invitation from the Vatican to be "cannonized." At first, you see, I thought it was a spelling error but then found that it wasn't.

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Amos
Date: 17 Aug 08 - 11:21 AM

Except that your version is spelled differently, with the word "Asylum" often appended.

A

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Aug 08 - 10:26 AM

No, no, I've already achieved that status.

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 17 Aug 08 - 12:15 AM

Well, or you'd be a saint.

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 10:16 PM

Sometimes. Everyone does, I guess. At least I've never known anyone who didn't. Probably be really bad for your health if you never did.

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 07:05 PM

"Or will he micromanage and pick nits, fail to accept the responsibility for failures and roll around in the glory of successes like a dog in a liquefying squirrel corpse?"

My, my...that's a pretty striking image, Rapaire. ;-D Heh! I've got my fingers crossed on this one. Let me ask you something...do you think Chongo is that immature, vain, and self-centered?

Well? Do you?

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: GUEST,Jack the Sailor
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 06:57 PM

I'm kinda worried about the pooh flinging at the State of the Union.

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Gurney
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 06:22 PM

Fascinating imagery, Rapaire.

Now I'll try to forget it.

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 06:17 PM

Can he delegate? Will he support the decisions of his subordinates? Or will he micromanage and pick nits, fail to accept the responsibility for failures and roll around in the glory of successes like a dog in a liquefying squirrel corpse?

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: GUEST,Jack the Sailor
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 02:04 PM

Chongo hot tempered? Unfit for command?

Maybe its justified.
Can anyone translate what the guy said to Chongo?

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: GUEST,Jack the Sailor
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 02:00 PM

Chongo disrespects navy SEAL

How can he be Commander in Chief if he doesn't support the troops?

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: GUEST,Jack the Sailor
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 01:51 PM

Chongo as President. it don't look good!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: GUEST,Jack the Sailor
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 01:39 PM

I was wondering how long it would be before Chongo's people (ie Little Hawk) would play the species card.

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 01:23 PM

Humph. The usual naysayers and ape-haters are chiming in with their sour grapes, I see. Better watch it, guys. Offensive views of primates like the one in the film I am posting a link to below will NOT be tolerated any longer after Chongo takes up residence in the Oval Office.

"At Home With the Poopflingers"

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: GUEST,Jack the Sailor
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 01:16 PM

Its obvious that Chongo cannot be trusted.

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: GUEST,Jack the Sailor
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 01:14 PM

If he is like most Chimps, he can't even command his own bowels and bladder. Its hard to take an official seriously when he has to wear a diaper to go out in public.

Subject: RE: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Amos
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 01:14 PM

Bush has already demonstrted that a chimp in an ugly suit can act social and make a lot of people laugh.

No command value there, though.

As for Chongo, if he can't even control his own sister, whyw ould anyone think he could direct a big office?



A

Subject: BS: Can Chongo Command?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 01:02 PM

Silly question, right? Of course Chongo can command. Years of law enforcement and rugged self-employment in one of the world's most gritty urban areas have prepared Chongo to assume the office of the presidency with full confidence. He will be able to meet foreign leaders like Vladimir Putin eye to eye and not blink, and with the firepower that Chongo packs, enemies of America will think twice before provoking him or threatening America's interests.

McCain has faced the North Vietnamese, but that's no big deal. Chongo has faced the North Side Gorillas!

Obama can outtalk most people, but that's no big deal. Chongo can outtalk most Orangutans!

Hillary has great power suits, but Chongo has style that Bogart would have envied. AND...he has a great sense of humor.

A quick re-viewing of this classic short film of Chongo will confirm that our ape for president has all the rhetorical and personal skills needed to serve as commander-in-chief of the USA.


Classic Chongo Scene