BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07

Subject: BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07
From: InOBU
Date: 23 Dec 07 - 09:04 PM

Twas the night before Mudcat Christmas,
and all through the fall
the catters had been grumbling, and drinking and all
Old lorcan had written narry a song
Though others had been musicing
and geting along...


Carry on folks... another year, another night before Xmas post

Happy Christmas all, Kwanza and Chanuka, Ramadan Dwalli etc...

=)
lor

Subject: RE: BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07
From: Charley Noble
Date: 23 Dec 07 - 10:00 PM

Twas the night before Mudcat Christmas,
Of was it the night after?
At the rate I've been drinkin' time passes much faster!
With a cat on my lap, just purring along,
There's no rhyme or reason to continue this song...

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07
From: Brendy
Date: 23 Dec 07 - 10:25 PM

It being the eve of Mudmas, (which we know comes once a year)
and it being on a Monday..., though it's hard to tell from here.
My options being plentiful, though for plenty would not opt
Instead I'll watch the World go round... and find a suitable rhyme for the end of this verse.... before I'm stopped

Happy Christmas one and all... ;-)

B.

Subject: RE: BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 23 Dec 07 - 10:54 PM

Twas the night before Mudcat Christmas,
and all through the hall
the catters had been drinking and puking and all

Still here guys...
:-)

Subject: RE: BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07
From: katlaughing
Date: 24 Dec 07 - 12:57 AM

...When what to my wondering eyes I saw flew (no pedants, please!)
A sleigh full of Martins pulled by a tiny,cold gnu
On, Blind Drunk! On, Spaw! On Fools, Charley & Brendy!
That gnu was a tough one, with the whip he was handy!
Now dash away, pull away, do it all NOW,
He yelled at them cracking, while waving quite madly,
"Get a move on! It's time for cock's crow!


{Arrgh!}

Subject: RE: BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07
From: SINSULL
Date: 24 Dec 07 - 08:30 AM

Mudkittens nestled all snug in their afghans
Dreamt pretty dreams of banjos and bodrhans.
While Spaw and his chicken
And the Hawk and his monkey
Complained as the banjo went plunky plinck plunky
When out on the lawn there arose such a din
As Cletus and Paw and the Reg Boys came in.
The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow
Was Paw's
And poor Karen screamed out "Oh NO!"
His eyes how they twinkled
Butt dimples so merry
And the naughty bits dangling were as red as spring cherries.
He said not a word
But went straight to his work
And lit all the candles with a grunt and a spurt.
And laying a finger aside of his nose
He blew out a booger that dribbled and froze...

Subject: RE: BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Dec 07 - 10:48 AM

And Maw in her kerchief and I in my cap
Had just fried our brains and were ready to nap
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter
I fell outa bed, hit my nose and blood spattered
Away to the window I tripped like The Flash
Threw up on the pane, the sill and the sash.
The red and blue lights on the newfallen snow
Counterpointed and highlighted muzzleflashes below.
And what to my wondering eyes should appear
But a something from "Cops" and eight tiny reindeer.

Subject: RE: BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07
From: Uncle Phil
Date: 24 Dec 07 - 11:55 AM

The Texans were nestled all snug in their beds,
While the sound of their music played in their heads,
John Lomax in Austin, Woody Guthrie in Pampas,
Lead Belly in Sugarland, and Texas folk dances.

When down in deep Ellum, there arose such a clatter,
Blind Lemon and Robert Johnston made music that matters,
Then the Light Crust Doughboys appeared like a flash,
And on to a Bob Wills' show away we did dash.

On Buddy Holly, on Flaco Jimenez,
On Ranchera, Norteno, on Polkas, and Waltzes,
On Willie, on Waylon, on Jerry Jeff Walker,
On Stevie Ray, ZZ Top, and on Billy Joe Shaver.

On Robert Earl Keen, on Big Mama Thorton,
On Ernest Tubb, on Guy Clark, on Johnny Horton,
Then I'll head to the show, con mi esposa,
To see Mudcatter Jed Marum or Tish Hinojosa.

On Townes Van Zandt, and on Jimmie Dale Gilmore,
On George Strait, on George Jones, on Bill's Record Store,
On Townes Van Zandt and on Marcia Ball,
Now fly away, fly away, fly away all.

And I heard them exclaim as they grinned with delight,
Feliz Navidad Mudcat, and to all a good night.
- Phil

Subject: RE: BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07
From: Uncle Phil
Date: 24 Dec 07 - 12:18 PM

Hmm, reading the last full verse I see that I like Townes Van Zandt twice as much as anyone else.

Subject: RE: BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07
From: katlaughing
Date: 24 Dec 07 - 12:35 PM

Brava, Sins and Bravo, Phil!

Subject: RE: BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Dec 07 - 12:39 PM

Twas the night before payday and all through the house
The girls were all sleeping, even The Mouse
Their stockings were hung on the clothesline with care
Knowing tomorrow the Johns would be there.

Subject: RE: BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07
From: Amos
Date: 24 Dec 07 - 12:47 PM

A reprint from a lazy sod:

All the ruction awoke me,
And I grabbed for my wrap,
And cantered downstairs
YEl;ling "What's all this crap?"

And there on the hearthstone,
A rubbing his jaw
(Which his fall had near broken)
Was a Santa-garbed Spaw!

He was round and tumescent
His big nose was glowing,
And through the red velvet
His erection was showing

But he hoisted his pants,
And he shifted his rig
To try and disguise it,
(Said his shorts were too big).

I was wholly in mystery!
What could be the skinny?
What had caused this arousal?
Then, I heard a faint whinny.

While Spaw looked embarassed,
And muttered "Aw, fuck"
I heard reindeer calling!
"Come on back, laddy-buck!"

"Come back to your Donder
And back to your Blitzen!
Lets be making der thunder
And bringing on spritzen!

There's no use just hiding
In that chimney below,
'Cause you aint getting home
Without us'ns, ya know!"

"Come make us all happy!
Or at least give a try!
'Cuz if you won't be our daddy,
We sure as hell will not fly!"

Spaw just look embarassed
His red cheeks were beaming,
For he knew I'd discovered
His bestial leaning.

And as for his tackle,
In this embarassing pass,
It had lost half its volume,
And most of its mass.

So he made his excuses,
Said "Look -- I must go!"
And he turned to the chimney
With a "Ho, fucking Ho!"

But I heard him addressing
Those reindeer so handy,
Yelling "Down, with you, Blitzen!
Jayzus Keerist, but you're randy!"

And the last thing he said,
As he flew out of sight,
Was "Joyous Damn Noel --
I will not last the night!"

Oliver Sensemilaa Holmquist III
The True Story of Christmas
Playboy Publications, 1992

Subject: RE: BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07
From: SINSULL
Date: 24 Dec 07 - 01:25 PM

WHenever I hear:
"Away to the window,
I flew like a flash
Tore open the shutter
And threw up the sash..."

I picture him hanging out the window sick and gagging on a Miss America sash. Go figure.

Subject: RE: BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07
From: InOBU
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 06:38 PM

=)

Subject: RE: BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 06:53 PM

...He spoke not a word but went straight to his work
And filled all the stockings with ashes and soot....

Subject: RE: BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07
From: Becca72
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 07:13 PM

In my house growing up it was "away to the window I flew like a flash, tripped over the rug and fell on my ass" Got it from Dad and got in trouble for it by Mum. :-)

Subject: RE: BS: Twas the night before MudCat Xmas 07
From: InOBU
Date: 29 Dec 07 - 09:16 PM

I used to sing, in between the sheets to every verce in Christmas carols... Da's old Sally Ann kid's joke... got in trouble in Quaker Meeting for it...

Oh come all ye faith full
(in between the sheets)
Joy full and triumphant
(in between the sheets...)

Joy to the world
(in between the sheets)
the lord has come
(in between the sheets)

Ah well..
lor