GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents

Subject: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: katlaughing
Date: 09 Jul 99 - 06:39 PM

For balance, dear M'Catters. Perhaps those who enjoyed the music therapy threads would enjoy this one, esp. if they contribute! BUT, it's open to anyone. Please, though, try to keep maintain the original intergrity. Thanks!

Maureen centered herself, softly humming the great AH-OM to herself. The meadow was gently lit by sunlight amongst the leaves of the trees in the West as it set in early evening. She was vaguely aware of quiet birdsong, a gathering of nestlings, bedding down for the night.

Gradually, she focused her consciousness on feeling the sweet grass beneath her. She imagined herself sinking roots deep into the earth, anchoring her body like the huge oak which stood lonely sentinel in the center of the field.

Raising her arms above her head, she visualised them as tree branches reaching into the very heavens. She felt grounded, yet free as the birds, soaring like an eagle high above her body.

Feeling sure of the connection, she released her self from her body and was instantly transported to a distant shore. A soft tide of warm saltwater was washing up seashells of pearl and abalone. In the distance she could hear a sweet refrain of flute music, tripping through the air as light as a feather, teasing her consciousness with memories of the last time she had visited this ethereal realm.

She had come to learn from the Wise Women, but instead had been greeted by the lonely Ruler of the Realm, Kieran, himself. The confusion and dismay at that meeting was what she'd hoped to straighten out with this visit, but so far no one was in sight. She started across the sands towards the melody of the flute. It seemed almost to compel her movement towards the dark woods.

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: katlaughing
Date: 11 Jul 99 - 07:56 AM

COMMERCIAL BREAK: Are you tired of inane threads? Has the lack of Music BS got you down? Then you are in the wrong place! Here at Ethereal Publishers we pride ourselves on serving up the most eclectic mix of NABS (New Age Bullsh*#) on the 'Net. Remember....if you want to feel good and look good while doing so, join us at Ethereal, where your 2 cents can make a difference! (Fade out to flute music)

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: Peter T.
Date: 11 Jul 99 - 11:55 AM

Well, kat, if you can break your own rule about original integrity!

Sherry Aims, New Age Nurse, in the first watch of the night, remembered all her past lives, Sherry Aims, Assistant to Florence Nightingale, Sherry Aims, Helper of Mary Magdalene, Sherry Aims, Surgeon to the Court of Hatshupeth, Sherry Aims, Neanderthal Nurse, Sherry Aims, Australopithecene Nurse, Sherry Aims, Dinosaur Nurse, Sherry Aims, Cockroach Nurse, Sherry Aims, Plankton Nurse. She bowed carefully to all these previous Buddhas and bodhisattvas, and all those in the 10 directions. She made her mind into a great web of awareness, draping her consciousness in the Jeweled Net of Indra, in the circle of the dreamcatcher. Especially she chanted the great, the powerful, the all encompassing mantra to Tara, Mistress of all means, Woman of all ways, female principle of the ear of all compassion, Avolakitesvara. Like Lords and Buddhas before her, she conquered the first watch of the night.
In the second watch of the night, Sherry Aims, New Age Nurse, moved from the realm of fiction into the realm of imagined fact, and pierced the great fable of existence to its depths. She grasped the incomparable realms of undertaking, of undergoing, of understanding. She felt that she was preparing for a new bodily existence, in the same moment as the great wheel of her mind was grinding towards escape from the kingdom of things. She contemplated the mystery of emptiness, as exemplified by Richard Gere's acting style. And so Sherry Aims conquered the second watch of the night.
In the third watch of the night, as she moved from the realm of imagined fact into the outworks of true existence, Sherry Aims confronted the graveness of death, the horrors of the degradation of the body, the nightmares of sickness, the dooms of judgement, and summer teen movies. So shaken was she by this that she momently hesitated about the transition to the real , but persisted. In the heavens, millions upon millions of figures, reaching back through all levels and spheres of existence bowed in the direction of her struggle and her victory: Sherry Aims, New Age nurse. She vowed to nurse all beings from the emergence of existence till the arrival of Maitreya, the Future Lord, and to ensure their well-being here, and in endless realms. In the land of the spirit, her new digital chrysalis was forming about her aura. And so she conquered the third watch of the night.
In the fourth watch of the night, Sherry Aims broke her digital chrysalis entered the analog world. She touched her foot down on the earth, and the pain of existence, the weight of gravity, shot through her, but she persisted. Endless eras of pain passed, and then she became used to walking on the path of suffering, and the pleasures of shopping. Thus passed the fourth watch of the night, and now, at the end of her journey, thus entered into life , Sherry Aims, New Age Nurse.
(May all beings, fictional, imagined, and real, be liberated!)

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: GUEST,Sherry Aims
Date: 18 Jul 00 - 11:22 PM

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: MMario
Date: 19 Jul 00 - 08:54 AM

thanks guys! peter, cockroach nurse?

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: Bagpuss
Date: 19 Jul 00 - 10:59 AM

The buddhist cow sat meditating in the field:

"Oooooooom" he said.

Bagpuss

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: MMario
Date: 19 Jul 00 - 11:30 AM

"ooooooom-oof!" breathed the buddhist cow, as Maureen tripped over him in her search for the flute music. He thought to himself, " my kharma will increase greatly if I resist goring this person. But I must be true unto my own nature as well, though I am enlightened enough to know my self as "cow" rather then "bull"." Therefore he broke wind and returned to chewing his cud. "oooooooooooooooooommmmmmmmmm"

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: Jim Krause
Date: 19 Jul 00 - 11:51 AM

"Maureen, Maureen!" called Kieran. "Over here, Maureen." The flute music drifted away, like a song on the wind.

He looked at her gently, softly. But there was more to the look in those pale gray/blue eyes than that. "Why are you here, Kieran?" she asked.

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: Mbo
Date: 19 Jul 00 - 12:05 PM

Then in bounced Krishna, blue skin an' a', wi' a coupla hundred goat lads and lasses ahint him. "Man," he said "dae I hae a story that'll flip yer ushnishad!"

--Mbo

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: Biskit
Date: 19 Jul 00 - 04:15 PM

Hare rama Krishna Krishna Hare rama Oh excuse me hello der madam cow mind sharin' yer meadow wi' me.I'll jus' be over there under th'shade tree next to the flute player. AHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhh what gentle music-Biskit-

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 19 Jul 00 - 04:42 PM

Surely this is sacred CS, not BS...

The flute music grew louder. The flowers danced in the music in the meadow in the dappled sunlight. The cow danced in the music in the meadow in the dappled sunlight. Krishna danced in the music in the meadow in the dappled sunlight.

Krishna held the most beautiful flower in the meadow in the dappled sunlight. He gave it to the cow. The cow ate the flower.

There was a crash in the heavens as the sky broke. The world travelled backwards. The cow cried Mooo...

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: MMario
Date: 19 Jul 00 - 04:52 PM

"you- doughboy! or whatever your name is....check the dangly bitz, stupid! I may consider myself a cow...but a "Madam" I am NOT!" thought the poor mis-identified bull.

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOmmmmmmmmmmm" continued the bull. "Hey! Backwards that would be MMMMMMoooooooooo!"

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 19 Jul 00 - 06:09 PM

The Three Wise Guys (Porthos, Athos, and Malcolm) were heading into the desert on Old Route 66, bound from Tucumcari to Las Vegas New Mexico. They stopped to gas up at the Sign of the Dinosaur Fillin' Station and Tastee Freeze just west of town, where the dilapidated adobe bungalows of the formerly prosperous Highway Souvenir and Holy Relic Merchants crumbled into broken walls and blistered wooden crucifixes, arroyos, then yucca, then grotesquely pink-flowering giant cacti which crouched in the landscape like transplanted specimens from some Martian Hothouse. The filling station was inhabited by a bitter Hispanic man who was absorbing a Ruch Limbaugh broadcast from a his transistor radio. When Athos payed for the gas, he got three dollars and 72 cents in change, plus a "Grand Old Buck" bearing the likeness of a smiling George W Mini-Me Bush and the motto "More Green Back to the Taxpayer".

The Trio left the station and climbed into the waiting red '63 Galaxie Convertible, the one with Seeking Enlightenment emblazoned on the Driver's side fender, and Open to Redemption on the Passenger's. These Wise Men were indeed following a star, the Golden One called Sol, who hurled his might against the parched ground of New Mexico,blasting mesquite bushes into gray skeletal forms, cracking ancient lava flows with hot currents of air,sucking cellular moisture from leaning shacks of long departed homesteaders until timbers tumbled, light as balsa, to the earth. Beyond three twisted strands of rusty barbed wire, the clarion call came: "OOOOOooommmmmm". And three wise heads turned to see the Buddhist Cow bellowing praise to the unnameable.

Malcolm turned and attested "a good omen. We are well on our way to enlightenment", but he was again wrong. In truth, they were only on their way to three Tecates and three plates of enchiladas in a cafe in Santa Rosa, leaving Enlightenment to crop the lush grass in a verdant field 82 miles behind them.

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: Lanfranc
Date: 19 Jul 00 - 06:18 PM

So that's how you spell Tucumcari!

"Jai guru deva om" rang out across the universe, and the Karma chameleon changed colours.

"Must have been someone he ate!" exclaimed Bond, not one wit cowed by the experience.

"Strictly speaking, I shouldn't be in bed with you at all" said the middle aged nurse.

"Cough", said the doctor, squeezing gently.

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: Morticia
Date: 19 Jul 00 - 07:39 PM

Maureen checked her body to make sure it was safe....the cows in the next field appeared to have business of their own so she felt no threat there. Floating up to meet her Nemesis, Kieran, Dark Lord of the Realm, she knew this time the struggle would solve the seemingly simple equation, her or him. Such a pity that their yearning and endless eons of striving had come to this but as the Gods ruled, so would she obey.
"I am coming, Kieran" she breathed on the ether " What will your reception be?"

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: Biskit
Date: 19 Jul 00 - 08:07 PM

Kieran.........Dark Lord of the realm???????wondered Biskit...First I mistake a Bull for a cow,...now this... I think that last west coast run had more of an effect on me than I thought he mumbled. In spite of these queer happenings he maitained his smile. Mbe I'm gettin' senile.....ah well he sighed,`least the flutes still playin'

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: Mbo
Date: 19 Jul 00 - 08:16 PM

Good one Alan! I was just singing that today!!!

Krishna was about to relate his tale, when he heard some voices singing "Hare Krishna". Turining around, he saw a some penguins kicking an American poet around. "Please stop kicking my b-hind, or I'll sic an ourang-outang on yer case!" HA HA quote the penguins. "Nevermore will we stop!" We didn't graduate elementary school to be bossed around by YOU!

--Mbo

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: Biskit
Date: 19 Jul 00 - 08:18 PM

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: MMario
Date: 19 Jul 00 - 08:56 PM

*I'd be speechless too, biskit!*

oooooooooMMMMMMMMoooooooooo chanted the Bull, Enlightenment. He meditated on how his life would have differed if only his mother had named him Knuckles, or Crusher, or even HornedDeath. But kharma had something different in store for him, he was sure.

Subject: RE: GENTLE TALE-Mostly BS-Add your 2 cents
From: Biskit
Date: 19 Jul 00 - 09:11 PM

Speechless is mostoften my high suit,MMario _Biskit-