Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: GUEST,Squiddy
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 12:27 PM

When will the Jello Tank be filled? I'm losing my slime coat!

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: gnu
Date: 03 Jan 13 - 10:50 PM

Right! Bert's buyin and I am... still washin dishes on accounta I PAY my debts. As long as the toons are good. *

* WARNING... Spinning again. I am in a R&R mood. After the Bluegrass thread, it just fits.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Ebbie
Date: 03 Jan 13 - 07:38 PM

gnu! gnu! Calm down. Chill, do. You owe nothin'.

I have it on good authority that Bert recently came into a GREAT DEAL of money- it's all covered.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: gnu
Date: 03 Jan 13 - 04:21 PM

Huh? What time is it? My tab is WHAT? Those empties ain't mine. Don't... yell.. at... me... just now. What's with the apron? Okay... okay... but ya better gimmie a shot unless ya want broken dishes. I asked you not to yell.

If I gotta wash dishes, I need some tunes. How about some dish washing music in the kitchen... What Time Is It? *

* WARNING... Spin Doctors, 1993... R&R with an edge.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Jan 13 - 03:21 PM

Take one down
Until you've passed out
Ain't no bottles of beer on the wall.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 03 Jan 13 - 03:07 PM

102!


102 bottles of beer on the wall 102 bottles of beer.

Take one down, til you've passed out a round.

96 bottles of beer on the wall.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 03 Jan 13 - 02:52 PM

And my last post was 100!

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 03 Jan 13 - 02:46 PM

Rapparee, you are an incorrigible conflagrationist. (What's more, you just love burning and melting things.) There may be a job for you in the hereafter...

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Ebbie
Date: 03 Jan 13 - 01:19 PM

yawn s t r e t c h What a nice nap. Where is everybody? Oh, I see you. Thank goodness there are some people who know how to keep a party going.

By the way, the bar has not changed much in all this time- but a couple of years ago the 'Great Remodel' rearranged a few things. But that's OK- just provided more nooks and crannies for naps and other things.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Jan 13 - 09:59 AM

Wimps, the lot of you. But I happen to have both a magnesium flare AND a white phosphorus grenade handy. Which would you prefer?

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 03 Jan 13 - 09:24 AM

Please place the grill 2 miles from the tavern. We just had the place painted.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: gnu
Date: 03 Jan 13 - 06:07 AM

Now, who do you want in charge of the grill?

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 02 Jan 13 - 11:33 PM

Just enough for the toddies OK?

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Jan 13 - 11:27 PM

It'll warm the place up real nice. Melt tool steel, it will.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 02 Jan 13 - 11:08 PM

Yeah! Toddies! We can heat em on on that fireplace. Thermite? that means warm doesn't it?

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: gnu
Date: 02 Jan 13 - 10:59 PM

I hope rum is keeping warm... well, I hope 9 is keeping rum warm. Fookin cold here! Minus too much celcius! And the wind ain't appreciated needer. Hot toddy's are in order.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 02 Jan 13 - 10:51 PM

I've got me rum to keep me warm!

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Jan 13 - 09:18 PM

I keep Christmas from December 6 (St. Nicholas Day) to January 6. If you guys get cold, I've got some thermite.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 02 Jan 13 - 08:28 PM

The door isn't locked, the lights are off, so it's just darker in there for you guys who are drinking beer and watching TV. If it gets drafty just wiggle your fingers so and the cats will creep over and climb up on the sofas with you and keep you warm. I think the ducks were chased off or you could have your choice of cat hair or down all over your clothes.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: gnu
Date: 02 Jan 13 - 03:19 PM

Drink up. JtS... the mummers are frozen solid and won't be around. Unless ye got some transplants down there.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 02 Jan 13 - 02:06 PM

"Looks like the tavern has emptied out. "

Nope, I'm staying till Old Christmas Day. The mummers haven't even come by yet and I have some homemade beer I've been saving all year. We'll put a jar on the bar to help out with the repairs.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: gnu
Date: 02 Jan 13 - 02:02 PM

Hmmm... I COULD go out the emergency exit but that would make a lot of noise and set off the alarm and the fire and police departments would respond. I don't wanna bother them. Maybe I'll just have some snacks and ales, watch the big screen and wait for someone to open the front door. Sounds like a plan to me.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 02 Jan 13 - 01:51 PM

Looks like the tavern has emptied out. Some of these events have been more exciting, but the property damage has strained Bert's credit card.

As to the looks of the place, perhaps some of our yarn art folks can create a few hangings to put on the walls and give it a more cultured appearance. Or do we have an old hippie who did macrame in the 1970s? He/she can weave hemp twine, beads, transistors and resistors, and old can pull tabs into a fabulous work of art (and impediment to cell phone signals). It would fit right in.

Sage turns off the light switch on her way out.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: gnu
Date: 01 Jan 13 - 01:27 PM

Swanky! Kinda looks like I am in the wrong place.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 01 Jan 13 - 01:03 PM

It looked like this at one time. The bar was magnificent. There were cosy booths and Jello used to come in cups. But like the time we redecorated Amos' house while he was on vacation, it has had a few modifications.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: gnu
Date: 31 Dec 12 - 03:19 PM

I have never seen a pic of the Mudtavern. But, I assume it is akin the the Legion House Hovel in Pocatello, ID or The Slop House(nickname) in Deer Lake, NF. Rough spot, that Slop House. Last rough spot I ever visited. I could tell ya a story but I gotta borrow some money ta pay fer me whiskey so's Keep don't chuck me. I'll gladly pay you Tuesday for my whiskey today.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 31 Dec 12 - 01:37 PM

You're right, Jack. Look, there's me playing the piano in green. Matches my 'Bonnie Green Garters'. The food on the table looks nice. But where are those explosive gentlemen and the green jelly?

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 31 Dec 12 - 01:27 PM

Does the search page on Google today have a picture of the Mudcat tavern?

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 31 Dec 12 - 01:12 PM

LOL Sinsull, my husband wears flannel onesies (thermal underwear, Long Johns) and I must say they're VERY fetching!
This thread should now be renamed Mudcat New Year Tavern, cos nobody's leaving yet.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: gnu
Date: 31 Dec 12 - 11:58 AM

"What fight?"

I forgot my wallet.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: gnu
Date: 31 Dec 12 - 11:43 AM

Quick. Gimme another whiskey before the fight starts.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: gnu
Date: 31 Dec 12 - 11:43 AM

Quick. Gimme a whiskey before the fight starts.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: SINSULL
Date: 31 Dec 12 - 11:25 AM

Bonny Green garters with prickly holly? Do you wear a hair shirt as well? Seems to be the wrong season for that stuff but to each her own.
I prefer flannel onesies.
SINS

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 31 Dec 12 - 10:03 AM

'Terms and Conditions may apply' eh? Hope the CIA or FBI aren't following this thread, Rapparee. They may draw some unpleasant conclusions about you!

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Dec 12 - 09:56 AM

MMario put it on some time ago.

Okay.

I swear and affirm, with my hand upon these Sacred Books, the holy Child Ballads (Camsco Music publication), that I firmly and herewith resolve that I will not fire off more than fifty (50) kilograms (or kilogrammes) of any explosive during 2013.*











*In any single lump of explosives. This does not affect to the total weight or mass of said expolosives, not does it apply to explosives set off at any distance above or below the surface of the earth, which includes pre-existing structure, caves, holes, mines, towers and similiar artifacts.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 31 Dec 12 - 05:31 AM

Sinsull, some people find trusses and support hose extremely attractive. My Bonnie Green Garters are decorated with holly in celebration of the season. Bit prickly though. Isn't it funny that all these macho men feel the need to grill! What IS it about men and barbecues? We'd better give them a stripey apron each, and some of those giant-size metal utensils. They already have enough sauce IMO.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: gnu
Date: 31 Dec 12 - 05:24 AM

Sandra... Rap meant *I* am grilling. And, it will be duck if they do that again. Filthy critters.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 31 Dec 12 - 02:04 AM

are you in charge of the grill, Rap - if so, what fuel are you using?

sandra (ducking for cover)

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Dec 12 - 12:57 AM

The auroch is grilling.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 30 Dec 12 - 08:56 PM

My neighbor, Mr. Willie Davis passed on this year. He was retired boiler maker so bad at music he had his wife play the soul music records. If we are lucky he will fry us some spots, croakers, Virginia mullets and clam fritters. MMMM MMMM goes so good with beer whiskey or gin and juice!

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: SINSULL
Date: 30 Dec 12 - 06:58 PM

Hmmmm
I've been in that ladies room and there are no ladies. No garters either. It's all trusses and Ace bandages and support hose. Wonder what that fool Rapparree was fondling?

The rum is good and strong but not Screech. It will do. When does the music begin? Once a year in the Tavern magic happens and old folkies return with the voices of their youth. Barry Finn, Rick Fielding, Kendall and Tom Hall with voices, Utah Phillips, maybe, if he's not too busy. Helen Schneyer. Let's lure them in with "All God's People Got A Place In The Choir".

The magic only lasts a short time.

Who has a guitar or a fiddle?

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 30 Dec 12 - 06:48 PM

Oh, look at all of the ducks up in the rafter! They must have flown in through the holes that Raparree blasted.

Better shoo them out of that area before you launch anything else. It's one thing to put holes in the ceiling, it's entirely another matter to harm ducks.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: gnu
Date: 30 Dec 12 - 06:33 PM

Well, I don't DO garters. Costs too much in lawyers' fees. I just run er on manual. Not near as much fun but it's a LOT cheaper and it don't require the committment to eventual misery and poverty.

Bitter? Yeah. WTF wouldn't I be?

Hey. This is a tavern, right? So, I am allowed. You, as barkeeps, gotta listen and NOT judge when I bitch and moan.

Drink up. There ain't much time left.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 30 Dec 12 - 02:57 PM

Semofolkie, come and sit with us girls. Can I interest you in some Adnam's ale? You'd better wear your tin helmet, 'cos Rapparee is in an explosive mood tonight!

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 30 Dec 12 - 01:39 PM

It's a continuation, Semofolkie, but it gets noiser. More explosive devices involved.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 30 Dec 12 - 12:50 PM

Time for Jello shots. Hold the Jello!

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Semofolkie
Date: 30 Dec 12 - 12:31 PM

When's the New Year's Eve party begin?

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 12 - 12:24 PM

More booze! More booze! Let us all get cockneyed...cockeyed...conked out.

Has anyone seen my blunderbuss?

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: Semofolkie
Date: 30 Dec 12 - 11:57 AM

*Walks by and peeps in the window, checking to see if the place is still open*

Subject: RE: Mudcat Christmas Tavern 2012
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 30 Dec 12 - 10:25 AM

Rapparee, you're downright dangerous sober, I don't think you should have any more whisky, you'll blow us all to smithereens. And so it was Squiddy who got into my garters? Put him back at once into his green jelly pit and behave yourself. Squiddy reminds me of a pupil years ago who wrote "An octopus has got eight testicles."