BS: Funny witticisms

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: Thompson
Date: 04 Feb 24 - 12:13 PM

Oh, I'm not peevish about Rafe/Ralph, Gillymor, just fascinated by snobberies.
Meanwhile, back to wit: GB Shaw - "A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always rely on the support of Paul."

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: Mrrzy
Date: 04 Feb 24 - 04:02 PM

Meself, it's spelled Ralph, pronounced Rafe. So,is Rafe misspelled, or Ralph mispronounced?

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: meself
Date: 04 Feb 24 - 10:10 PM

... uh ... I dunno ... much as I'm flattered - why ya asking me?

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: MaJoC the Filk
Date: 05 Feb 24 - 04:45 AM

> is Rafe misspelled, or Ralph mispronounced?

Yes.

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: The Sandman
Date: 05 Feb 24 - 07:41 AM

Mark Twain" never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: Mrrzy
Date: 11 Feb 24 - 08:26 AM

Never argue with a pedant. It wastes your time, and annoys the pedant.

Misquoted from memory...

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: gillymor
Date: 11 Feb 24 - 10:11 AM

Oscar Wilde, while being served champagne on his death bed, supposedly said "I'm dying beyond my means."

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: Mrrzy
Date: 11 Feb 24 - 11:55 AM

Was it Voltaire, seeing a candle by his deathbed... What, the flames already?

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: gillymor
Date: 11 Feb 24 - 12:18 PM

I think Voltaire also said, or wrote, "It's because one can be silly that the many don't hang themselves".

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: Mrrzy
Date: 12 Feb 24 - 09:32 AM

But if Voltaire had not existed, it would not have been necessary to invent him. Nietzche, I think. Well, I know he said it about someone who'd said that if god hadn't existed it would have been necessary to invent him.

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: Sol
Date: 18 Feb 24 - 07:35 PM

Yogi Bera - the king of (unintended?) witticisms.
Yogi Bera quotes

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: meself
Date: 20 Feb 24 - 12:33 PM

I like those Yogi Berra quotes - although I'm not sure why anyone would bother quoting, "It's fun; baseball's fun" or "I'm glad I was in the Navy" ... and there are a few that strike me more as 'Yogi Berra inspired' than as authentic, such as, "The future ain't what it used to be". Of course, I could be wrong .....

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 20 Feb 24 - 01:31 PM

Did he say something about picanic baskets?

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: MudGuard
Date: 20 Feb 24 - 03:25 PM

When I was young, everything was better. Even the future ...

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: gillymor
Date: 20 Feb 24 - 07:12 PM

Reminds me of, "The older I get the better I was".

(Smarter than the avuhrage bear!)

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: Mrrzy
Date: 22 Feb 24 - 11:13 AM

Hey hey hey booboo!

I read all those to my kids when he died. They rolled on the floor and laughed their asses off.

Pity none (that I know of) were *intentional* - so maybe malapropisms rather than witticisms?

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: Thompson
Date: 23 Feb 24 - 02:32 AM

Ezra Pound quoted two supposed conversations between English royalty and the first Minister for Foreign Affairs of the Irish Free State, Desmond Fitzgerald, who, like all of that first Irish government had served in the Irish Republican Army during the War of Independence, and also served plenty of time in English jails and prison camps:

1)
Queen Mary: What did you do in the war?
DF: Time

2)
King George: Were you ever in the army?
DF (not to be high-hatted): Not the *British* Army.

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: Neil D
Date: 24 Feb 24 - 04:05 AM

Didn't G.B. Shaw say that the British and Americans were to peoples separated by a common tongue?

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: Mrrzy
Date: 26 Feb 24 - 11:16 AM

Not sure who said Americans think 100 years is a long time, whereas Brits think 100 miles is a long way.

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: Thompson
Date: 27 Feb 24 - 05:51 PM

GBS also had the perfect definition of golf: "A good walk spoiled".

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: robomatic
Date: 27 Feb 24 - 06:03 PM

My version of the Oscar Wilde toast:

"To the United States: The only country to go from barbarism to decadence without a period of civilization in between!"

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: Mrrzy
Date: 29 Feb 24 - 09:53 AM

Ghandi comes to mind... when asked what he thought of western civilization, he thought it would be a good idea.

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: robomatic
Date: 29 Feb 24 - 03:06 PM

Let's be kind and ask a moderator to correct the common mis-spelling of the proper noun in the previous message. Then please eliminate this message.

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: Mrrzy
Date: 01 Mar 24 - 03:11 PM

Argh! Gandhi! Sorry!

Subject: RE: BS: Funny witticisms
From: Sol
Date: 04 Mar 24 - 04:12 PM

Whenever he was one short of something, an old colleague of mine used to say, "I've got an extra one too less."
??? Go figure.