BS: Want to meet someone?

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 18 Aug 09 - 01:03 AM

I really enjoyed rereading this thread also. There was an unspoken subtext, of sorts, people getting to know each other on the side, though we don't know about the original lonely heart. Didn't AllanC also marry since this started?

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: Ebbie
Date: 17 Aug 09 - 10:32 AM

I went looking for it, Jacqui, because of what Kendall said yesterday (?) on another thread, something to the effect that 'Jacqui said something intelligent and he wrote in response' and that's where it all began.

And you are right: it's made me smile too.

{{{{Jacqui and Kendall}}}}

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: jacqui.c
Date: 17 Aug 09 - 07:46 AM

I'd forgotten this thread. It's made me smile reading through it. Who would have thought, then.................

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: Jeri
Date: 16 Aug 09 - 09:40 PM

Kendall, huh?

I wonder if the original subject had any luck. A lot of connections have been made because of Mudcat. Some work, although not always in the way you expect, and some just don't. The ones that do are uplifting for everybody involved.

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: kendall
Date: 16 Aug 09 - 09:32 PM

Men and women are hard wired differently. Adjust.

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: curmudgeon
Date: 16 Aug 09 - 09:31 PM

Ebbie - You have exposed the Mudcat for what it really is.

Usually, the resurrection of an old thread has a link to a porn pimp.

But now, you have unveiled the origins of a courtship which has led to the "marriage of true minds."

Thanks - Tom

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: Ebbie
Date: 16 Aug 09 - 09:03 PM

Life is amazing sometimes. And beautiful.

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: frogprince
Date: 16 Aug 09 - 08:22 PM

Awwww; just moments ago I wished Jacqui a belated happy b'day, and then I found this and jumped to Ebbies new entry. Wut a smiler.

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: Amos
Date: 16 Aug 09 - 08:20 PM

I think this was one of the more touching, endearing and honest threads I've read on the Cat.

Yes, Maine is about right...

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: Ebbie
Date: 16 Aug 09 - 08:19 PM

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: Ebbie
Date: 16 Aug 09 - 05:28 PM

Somehow this thread makes me think of Maine. :)

(Happy endings are nice.)

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: jacqui c
Date: 07 Dec 03 - 05:23 PM

I've got the friends, who are great. One of them is even going to put me up for a week when I have to have a foot operation. but there's still an empty space sometimes that even the closest friends can't fill and that comes from not having the wonderful emotional and physical contact that comes with love. I think that LH will know what I'm talking about - you can be as resistant to a new relationship as you want but when it hits there ain't much you can do!

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Dec 03 - 06:51 PM

Really? The Marriot? Is your wife's name Rachel?

(just kidding!)

I met someone today who just about blew all my circuits and assumptions right out of the water, but I'm maintaining my equilibrium...I think...whew!

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: GUEST,bclitton
Date: 06 Dec 03 - 04:20 PM

Communication is the key for meeting potential mates and for maintaining relationships. My wife and I even talk while we having sex. Just last night she called me from the Marriot...

Slick

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: GUEST,Diva
Date: 06 Dec 03 - 03:45 AM

Its been a very stressful week and the straw that broke the camels back was hearing about the death of a friends husband. A friend is someone who drives you home, miles out of their way because you're too upset to cope with the practicalities and manages to make you smile on the way. It then turned surreal as we had an extra 20 miles diversion because of a car accident on the main road.
Like Foolstroupe said, we all need more friends like these.

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 05 Dec 03 - 07:31 PM

Just had a phone call from a friend. She heard on the news about a traffic accident in my suburb, in a street that runs right near my place - so phoned to see if I was still alive.

That's a friend. Want more of those....

Robin

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Dec 03 - 06:26 PM

Why is it so difficult? But like Jaquci C said, keep trying. So if I just bide my time. Course I could come out and just tell him, to be told the infamous "I like you but just as a friend" line.

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 05 Dec 03 - 06:09 AM

And you think only ladies have those problems? even including the "already has another woman" one... :-)

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: jacqui.c
Date: 05 Dec 03 - 04:08 AM

Had the same problem - but he just didn't fancy me. Keep trying.

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: GUEST
Date: 04 Dec 03 - 04:32 PM

Met someone I really like, he makes me laugh,has a brain, likes folk music. Fancies my mate. Oh well....here we go again

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: jacqui.c
Date: 04 Dec 03 - 10:35 AM

So - I'm looking - haven't had a lot of luck recently and don't seem to get to places where I meet new (and single) guys either. I'm on profiles with a photo. I'm a regular at the Hertford Club singalong on a Monday night.

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: the lemonade lady
Date: 04 Dec 03 - 08:48 AM

Perhaps we need a little remender as to why I posted this thread...

There are some folkies out there who have had some bad luck, or even no luck at all. They've tried many ways to meet someone with no success and are a tad lonely. Some of us are loud and confident and manage to get what we want. Others aren't quite so...

Sal

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 02 Dec 03 - 09:08 PM

That reminds me - has anybody got the words and chords for

"Long Playing Daddy" - please put them in a new thread...

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 02 Dec 03 - 07:11 PM

It's the obsession about being long enough to go far enough that is responsible for so much ridiculous spam.

Haven't people realised that the biggest turn on for some other people is a sense of the ridiculous?

GSOH would probably suffice.

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: kendall
Date: 02 Dec 03 - 01:27 PM

This thread has gone far enough

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: GUEST,DeGaul
Date: 02 Dec 03 - 01:11 PM

Only if the modern machine is "slick" enough my needle! Older women are not really suitable. They tend to be less agile (they can't lock their heels behind their necks) and they also tend to be, my my how can we put this gently, a bit "loose" (Carmen Electra had HERS tightened up a stitch or two, for goodness sakes) and, alas, just a mite on the dry side.

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: jacqui.c
Date: 02 Dec 03 - 04:19 AM

Yes, but would he play on a modern machine?

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 01 Dec 03 - 08:21 PM

If he's a 78, then playback at 45 or 33 would last longer... :-)

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: kendall
Date: 01 Dec 03 - 08:03 PM

Well, at least he's honest.

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: GUEST,DeGaul
Date: 01 Dec 03 - 07:31 PM

I am an older frenchman (78) and would like to meet 2 twenty year olds to revitalize me...or perhaps I am not wired for 220.

Charles

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 01 Dec 03 - 04:09 PM

Perhaps threads like this are a good reason to ban postings by people without cookies...

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: GUEST,plusmama
Date: 01 Dec 03 - 01:43 PM

I am an "older" mama and am plus sized. So come on boys, if I can find a siazble man to stuff this quim...the back seat it is (or a truck bed) or a barn loft or even a table or a bed!

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: GUEST,hotoy
Date: 01 Dec 03 - 09:28 AM

Since so many women (especially you older ones) seem to be desperate to be loved by a man why do you refuse to put out da nookie when we ask for it politely? Carseats and truck beds are good enough for us guys...why not you? Remember (in the words of the king) if you don't, your sister will! Soooooooooooo, wise up ladies and be prepared to lose the laundry wherever you happen to be when the mood strikes.

Albus

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: kendall
Date: 01 Dec 03 - 08:20 AM

Learn to read body language. IT doesn't lie.

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: jacqui.c
Date: 01 Dec 03 - 08:14 AM

5 pages! You MUST be an expert!

I'm sorry if some of my sex behave in such a way. I know from experience that it can be difficult to have feelings for a guy that aren't returned and to try and maintain a friendship. I suppose that the aggresive attitude is really a defence against hurt feelings - even if there was no real reason to believe that there was a possibility of anything further. Sometimes both men and women read into perfectly innocent attitudes something more - because we so want it to be more.

As for control freaks - tell me about it! Male or female they're real trouble - and it starts from the first time that they 'suggest' that you might change something about yourself. I have a friend who is going into a new relationship and the bluebirds are tweetering around her head. From the outside I can see that this man is going to take her over (and no, it's not jealousy on my part - he's already suggesting that she buys new, sexier underwear and persuaded her to drink beer, which he likes, rather than wine, which she likes) but I can't say anything for fear of upsetting a now rather delicate friendship because he is starting to go toward exclusivity.

I can't say that I'm an expert on men - if I was I probably a) would be in a good relationship now or b)would be steering extremely clear of rather than looking for one. Reading some of the threads (especially this one) gives a little bit of an insight into attitudes and motives but it's so difficult, when somple friendships with the opposite sex seem to be a minefield, to really get a handle on their behaviour. Maybe that's a good thing!

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 01 Dec 03 - 05:28 AM

jacqui - guys can be shy too...

one thing I have noticed is that often if I back off even just a little from a woman who IS interested in "getting on down it" then suddenly, _I_ am the worst sort of scum that turns a lady down - what ever happened to friendship? - so I am even more cautious these days.

total exclusivity === control freak!!! Warning! Warning!

And I no longer even am interested in putting the effort in trying to know more about most women I meet if there is NO interest in performing an instrument --- behave yourselves!

subtle interest - now do you think I am going to give away for nothing all of the things I have learned the hard way?

Look for my forthcoming book:

"Everything I have learnt about Women" 5 pages, Price 50 cents...

Robin

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: jacqui.c
Date: 01 Dec 03 - 04:39 AM

Foolestruope - What about if the lady's shy or was brought up to believe that a woman doesn't make the first move? How do you recognise 'subtle interest'? I know what you mean though - there almost seems to be an expectation that any friendship between a man and a woman has to be cemented as early as possible with sex. WHY? Can't adults get the idea of moving through friendship to something more?

LH - I agree with you about the exclusivity - my ex wanted that and in the nineteen years that we were together I can count the friends we made on the fingers of one hand. We very rarely got involved in anything with other people - we were this tight little unit. Since splitting up I've made a number of good friends, got involved in the music and in some voluntary work and made a life for myself. Any future involvement would have to have at least the music in common.

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 30 Nov 03 - 07:21 PM

I am always wanting to meet people, especially to play music with. Especially multi-instrumentalists. But the phrase "meet people" is so overloaded with sexual inneuendo that I no longer want to "meet people"....

As for things other than music, at my age, and with my past experiences, I prefer to sit quietly in the corner and wait until I see some lady that expresses some subtle interest in me. Dumb Blondes need not apply. Of course, many blondes are only acting dumb, either in self defence, or because they believe "Bokndes Have More Fun!"

Robin

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 30 Nov 03 - 05:58 PM

Think about what Kendall?

"he's got no falorum"

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Nov 03 - 04:12 PM

Yep. It's more intense and more exclusive. It's the exclusivity that can become a problem sometimes (and I'm not talking about sex, but about available energy and attention).

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: jacqui c
Date: 30 Nov 03 - 03:55 PM

A friend of mine told me that his ideal relationship would be for both parties to have their own home but to be able to spend time together. I must admit that this particular guy, having come through a rather gruesome relationship seems to be in no hurry to think about commitment but I can see some sense in what he's saying. The idea of having a close relationship with someone you really care for but having a bolt hole to go back to for a little space from time to time is very appealing - so long as both of you want the same thing. The strength of the feeling I suppose would show in the degree to which each partner needed that bolt hole.

I think the majority of human beings want that intimacy that comes with a good physical relationship - enjoying life together, laughing and even crying together, knowing, if you wake during the night that that person is there. I have a number of good friends but there is only so far that good friends can go - the relationship of lovers is completely different.

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Nov 03 - 08:46 PM

Well, perhaps, KMR. It could be great if it was the right person. I'm open to the possibility, I'm just not looking, that's all. I do think it somewhat unlikely at this point that I'd want to spend the whole rest of my life with one other person, but you never know...

What I really enjoy in life is having a lot of dear friends whom I really love, and still living as a single person at the same time.   Suits me better than the "two birds in a nest" routine, I guess.

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: Katemaryrose
Date: 29 Nov 03 - 08:30 PM

Well, Little Hawk, I think you are very mature and independant, but as well as having the earth and the beauty of nature as your companion, would not a good woman at your side.........one with whom you can share your wisdom...one with whom you can chew the cud or sift the chaff from the grain.....would you not enjoy the rest of your life with such a companion when going in to your old age?
Just wondering!
It as quite a different story at 22 for sure!
KMR

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Nov 03 - 08:15 PM

Ha! Ha! Ha! Awright, kendall! Best laugh I've had tonight. No wet dreams anymore, eh?

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: kendall
Date: 29 Nov 03 - 08:04 PM

I can't speak for all women, or most women, or even many women, but I have heard a few women admit that after becoming mothers and/or going through the change, they lost all interest in sex. and it had nothing to do with their partners. (Women tell me the damdest things!)

Also, men are not immune to this decrease; when I was young, I thought about sex all the time. Now, I only think of it when I'm awake.

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Nov 03 - 07:26 PM

And yeah, making love is about the most personal thing that you can possibly do with another person. Which is why it's not something to take lightly. Most women know that. A lot of men don't.

If you have two people who are both okay about taking it lightly, though, that's okay with me...

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Nov 03 - 06:50 PM

I hear a lot of talk about "relationships". Given the fact that I already have lively ongoing relationships with the Earth, Nature, and the many other living things around me...plants, animals, people, and so on...why should I obsess about whether or not I have a specific female sexual companion at any particular time?

Of course, I didn't feel that way at age 22! At that point, it was the main thing on my mind. Things change.

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: jacqui c
Date: 29 Nov 03 - 04:37 PM

Sin - I'm with you - same age, single - no cats. I would say that CY's atitude to relationships probably would turn a lot of women off. I can't think of many women of my acquaintance who would want to be thought of as primarily available for the sexual gratification of her partner - been there and didn't like it.

Making love is the closest one person will ever get, physically, to another. I just think that you need to be pretty close, emotionally, to another person to really make that work. And, Kendall - I understand what you're saying about volcanoes - I agree, but there's more than one way to skin a cat if, for any reason the normal avenues aren't available and I can think of a couple of my friends in relationships who, for one reason or another, can't have intercourse but who do manage to have satisfying sex lives.

I would love to find the guy that I could really feel happy spending the rest of my life with, and yes, I miss a physical relationship, but so far it hasn't happened and I have to accept that the likelihood probably reduces as I get older. But I ain't going to pretend to be something I'm not just for company.

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: Jeri
Date: 29 Nov 03 - 10:48 AM

My guess is it's just an expression and the use of the word 'dog' is irrelevant. If one mistakes a snarl for a yelp, one can wind up finding teeth in one's ass.

One also starts to wonder if saying women aren't interested in sleeping with them because they're post-menopausal is the geriatric version of "if she doesn't want ME, she must be a lesbian." The post-menopausal thing is true in some cases, I think. In others, a woman who's sufficiently interested would, I'd think, at least want to want to. If the relationship is such that you can't both at least talk about it, it's not a very good one anyway.

I've known (no, I didn't mean "known") lots (ok, what I really didn't mean was "lots") of guys who went for the sex first, and then waited to see if an emotional relationship grew out of it. This might work if you're 20-something, but it might not be very successful in beginning a relationship with those of us who're economizing on hormones. It might not work anyway. It might help to change one's approach, but it's very hard for an old dog (didn't mean anything derogatory by that) new tricks.

Haha! Listen to me...single, and as far out of the dating loop as I can get without falling off the edge of the planet.

Subject: RE: BS: Want to meet someone?
From: SINSULL
Date: 29 Nov 03 - 10:21 AM

Thank you, Kendall,... I think.

GUEST - is the "dog" reference another shot at post-menopausal women?

SINS, who apologizes for her PMS and now will go back to playing nice.