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Misleading signs
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Subject: Misleadind signs From: PennyBlack Date: 22 Oct 04 - 06:45 PM Looking for ideas re. Misleading signs. e.g. "No Smoking Allowed" does this actually mean you are allowed not to smoke? there must be many more signs that could be misinterpreted. many thanks for any observations PB |
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Subject: RE: Misleadind signs From: Nerd Date: 22 Oct 04 - 07:14 PM "No Smoking allowed" could not be misinterpreted in the way you suggest. The act of not smoking is called "not smoking" not "no smoking," so a sign claiming it was OK not to smoke would have to say "not smoking allowed." |
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Subject: RE: Misleadind signs From: Dead Horse Date: 22 Oct 04 - 07:48 PM Stating the obvious - Wet Paint Frighteningly - This Door is Alarmed! |
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Subject: RE: Misleadind signs From: Bernard Date: 22 Oct 04 - 08:08 PM What about the classic PC boot error message... "Keyboard Error - press F1 to continue"!!! Then there was the condom machine that said 'Warning! Alarm Fitted!"... Slightly off the point, but a coffee manufacturer's label said "Original Blend", and underneath "Great New Flavour"... erm?!?! Obviously I mustn't mention that it was Nescafé!! |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: GUEST Date: 22 Oct 04 - 08:25 PM not misleading, just stating the obvious in a litigation concious world product may contain nuts... on a packet of peanuts caution, filling may be hot... on pop tarts how about caution, contents may cause intoxication, on cans of beer not long now, sigh... |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Nerd Date: 22 Oct 04 - 08:30 PM This should be in BS, by the way! |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: The Fooles Troupe Date: 22 Oct 04 - 08:39 PM The Door is Alarmed - I'm Terrified! I've always wanted to go around with a bunch of "Dry Paint" signs. I'll save this thread from a BS fate - here's a clever song anybody got the words for? I can't remember who got it on the Hit Parade... Signs! Signs! Everywhere is Signs! Blocking the scenery, blowing my mind! Don't do this, don't do that, Can't you read the signs? |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: GUEST Date: 22 Oct 04 - 09:17 PM
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: YorkshireYankee Date: 22 Oct 04 - 09:51 PM One of the best sig quotes I ever saw was: Who is General Failure – and why is the military reading my hard drive? |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: The Fooles Troupe Date: 22 Oct 04 - 10:08 PM Oops! Too Late! Well I tried! |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: dianavan Date: 22 Oct 04 - 10:22 PM Signs are for people who read them - a quote from a friend. d |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: JohnInKansas Date: 22 Oct 04 - 11:25 PM The "peanut allergy" thing is so common that I was only mildly surprised, on a package NOT containing nuts, to see: "This food product has been processed using machinery that may have processed peanuts." Not misleading, but ... . John |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: katlaughing Date: 22 Oct 04 - 11:51 PM Foolestroupe, Five Man Electrical Band, but I could've sworn it was Arlo! |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: s&r Date: 23 Oct 04 - 05:16 AM Weren't there nine musicians in Temperance Seven? One over the eight as I remember.. could be wrong Stu |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Georgiansilver Date: 23 Oct 04 - 05:29 AM In Derbyshire U.K there was a court case involving a man who had driven over a railway crossing whilst the red lights flashed. He was discharged fron court and all the signs changed as the sign had actually stated "Do not cross while lights flash".... WHILE in Derbyshire dialect can be interpreted as "UNTIL". A costly mistake for the planners. Best wishes. |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: PennyBlack Date: 23 Oct 04 - 06:40 AM as the sugesting are to be a basis for a song "NERD" I didn't feel it was BS - if it is I'm sure "The powers that be" can move it if they see fit. Many thanks for the suggestions so far. keep 'em coming. not a sign but I always like it when you get a book or the like with one page blank except for "Intentionally left Blank" printed in the middle! PB |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Georgiansilver Date: 23 Oct 04 - 06:45 AM I know I have mentioned these before on another thread but I do love them both:- The last thing you see as you enter the airport to take your long awaited flight to your holiday destination............."TERMINAL" Also the sign outside major Hospitals in the UK which says:- "BEWARE, GUARD DOGS OPERATING"..... Who needs an operation???? Best wishes. |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Bernard Date: 23 Oct 04 - 08:42 AM Hmmm... Trains stop at a train station... Buses stop at a bus station... So... work station?! A King rules a kingdom... A Prince rules a principality... So... a country?! As for the tetchy anonymous guest... have you nothing better to do than grumble about a bit of fun??! ;o) |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Jerry Rasmussen Date: 23 Oct 04 - 08:57 AM One of my favorites is "Watch batteries changed." I mean, yeah, there are times when my life gets a little slow but there's no way I'm going to go to a store to sit around and watch them change batteries. Sheesh! Jerry |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: PennyBlack Date: 23 Oct 04 - 09:05 AM In Lewis's store in Blackpool they actually had an ear-ring booth that had the age old sign "Ears Pierced whilst you wait" - I'm sure the owner did it on pupose, or did he? PB |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: The Fooles Troupe Date: 23 Oct 04 - 11:21 AM Doubtless Van Gough probably wouldn't wait... |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Nigel Parsons Date: 23 Oct 04 - 11:39 AM Those signs that say "Wet Paint", is that a warning, or an instruction? Nigel |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: frogprince Date: 23 Oct 04 - 12:30 PM Signs placed so they are usually partially blocked from view can be an interesting sub-genre. The carts at out local market are all marked "snap down only to eat child". |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Nerd Date: 23 Oct 04 - 12:51 PM Oh, sorry PennyBlack, you didn't make it clear it was for a song. We often have threads like this in the BS section just for fun. In fact, if you do a search on "signs" you'll probably find previous threads on the same or similar topics. |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Michael Date: 23 Oct 04 - 12:52 PM When it says 'GUARD DOGS' do you have to? Mike |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Michael Date: 23 Oct 04 - 12:55 PM Was going to add ; like wise 'BLIND PEOPLE' but pressed 'SUBMIT' too soon. Mike |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: frogprince Date: 23 Oct 04 - 01:09 PM |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: frogprince Date: 23 Oct 04 - 01:12 PM It was the great Anne Hills who once recounted a very long cross-county drive, what with stopping to "CLEAN REST ROOMS" every time the signs said so. |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: GUEST Date: 23 Oct 04 - 01:35 PM Driving through the town the other day i saw, proudly posted on a lampost, a temporary sign, with a big arrow pointing into the university,saying BRAILE SCHOOL. Now, please, who the hell was that sign for? And a local undertaker has a sense of humour with a notice in his window, Bravely stating, established 50 years ago and as of yet not one customer has complained! and while I'm at it......................................... In a shopping centre TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW In a Laundrette AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT In a department store: BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS In my work canteen: AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD Outside a secondhand shop: WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN? Notice in health food shop window: CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS Spotted in a safari park: ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR Seen during a conference: FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR Notice in a farmer's field: THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES. Message on a leaflet: IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL YOU HOW AND WHERE TO GET LESSONS :0) |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Jerry Rasmussen Date: 23 Oct 04 - 01:44 PM What about the signs that say "Slow Children." Isn't that prejudiced? Jerry And a misspelled sign I wish I'd taken a photograph of... saw it in Harlem in the 60's. It was on the side of a building and said "Violaters Will Be Persecuted." |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: PennyBlack Date: 23 Oct 04 - 05:37 PM Nerd - no problem I did in fact do a search without a lot of "Joy" so being somewhat "idle" thought I'd start a new thread... Never really liked the "BS" title but have earned a living from it for 40 years so can't complain if I'm in it! There's some good material so far cheers, PB |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: The Fooles Troupe Date: 23 Oct 04 - 08:41 PM The little Take Away Food Shop The Taik Hawaii... |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: GUEST Date: 23 Oct 04 - 09:09 PM The parking lot near the erstwhile Old Man of the Mountain, in New Hampshire, is officially marked "Old Man Parking." My mother always liked "Left turn only, both directions." |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Mr Red Date: 24 Oct 04 - 11:27 AM Georgiansilver Not just Derbyshire - the whole of Hallamshire and on up to Barnsley and over to HULL !!! I have never heard this actual court case you refer to cited but I have heard the story located in Manchester and Cleckheaton etc - Hence the wording now. It is in the friends of a cousin's former girlfriend's in-law dept. 'appen. (translates to "'appen so" in Cleckheaton) |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Nerd Date: 24 Oct 04 - 05:14 PM funny road signs thread |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Liz the Squeak Date: 24 Oct 04 - 05:48 PM I like the one in my heart clinic that points to a tiny room marked 'patient waiting'. LTS |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Big Al Whittle Date: 24 Oct 04 - 06:57 PM A friend of mine working in power station saw this safety sign that said: BE ALERT! some wag wrote underneath - we need more lerts! |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: GUEST,Mingulay Date: 25 Oct 04 - 05:53 AM Not exactly a sign, but there's a driving school near me that bears the name "IMPACT". Also some years ago Anglia TV carried adverts for Newmarket Racecourse that extolled the facilities on offer including "large drive in car parks". I often wondered what other types there were. |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Splott Man Date: 25 Oct 04 - 07:49 AM I once saw an estate agents sign advertising "expensive property for sale" I think they meant extensive or expansive. |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: GUEST,James Date: 25 Oct 04 - 09:12 AM Flmable, inflamable, noniflamable, non inflamable..what DOES this mean ? I like the Dept of Highways signs that say Slow Men Working.Also, Only Blind Dogs May Board The Bus. A Hospital called I Killam. |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Mr Red Date: 25 Oct 04 - 09:36 AM In NZ they used to have road signs at Junctions saying "Give Way" OK OK not very funny but they had the notion we would read it nearest word first. On the road they painted the same message which everyone and his brother would read top word fisrt so it said Way Give I think they abandonned the idea. But you have to admire the antipodean appropriateness. |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: muppitz Date: 25 Oct 04 - 11:03 AM Not exactly a misleading sign, more a case of 'it's a bit late now'. On the bottom of a supermarket ready made trifle "Do not turn upside down" Muppitz x |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: GUEST Date: 25 Oct 04 - 02:29 PM For Sale..Fresh Frozen Halibut.....? |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: grumpy al Date: 25 Oct 04 - 02:57 PM not misleading but quite ammusing, seen on a bumper sticker... My Karma ran over my Dogma |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: GUEST,petr Date: 25 Oct 04 - 04:55 PM cant remember but a sign on a hotel door in an Asian country. Please Dont Bother |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Blowzabella Date: 25 Oct 04 - 07:42 PM I like the blackboard in our local which says they serve : Scampi (Reformed) What - it used to be bad scampi, but it's going straight now or something? Also, not misleading but amusing - the contraceptive pill that was made in...wait for it...Maidenhead! |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: frogprince Date: 25 Oct 04 - 08:36 PM Spent part of the summer of 1964 slaving on the mess deck at Patuxent River, MD., Naval Air Station. The containers of milk we got for the dispensers were labled "Homo VD, Skagsville". Honest Injun. |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Nerd Date: 26 Oct 04 - 02:10 AM Yes, Mr Red, our version of that in the US is "LANE FIRE" when a special lane is set aside for firetrucks. |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: Michael Date: 26 Oct 04 - 04:50 AM On of my favourites, which I have posted somewhere before; 'BRIDGE STRENGTHENING WORKS' so they don't just do it to delay traffic |
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Subject: RE: Misleading signs From: The Fooles Troupe Date: 26 Oct 04 - 08:03 AM Ahh Mr Red, I seem to remember similar road signs that said 'Down Slow' |
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