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BS: What do you want on your gravestone?

GUEST 30 Nov 04 - 12:07 PM
Rapparee 30 Nov 04 - 12:08 PM
Pauline L 30 Nov 04 - 12:21 PM
Clinton Hammond 30 Nov 04 - 12:27 PM
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Dead Horse 30 Nov 04 - 12:41 PM
Mooh 30 Nov 04 - 12:49 PM
Schantieman 30 Nov 04 - 12:53 PM
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Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull 30 Nov 04 - 01:07 PM
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alanabit 30 Nov 04 - 01:18 PM
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Clinton Hammond 30 Nov 04 - 01:35 PM
Little Hawk 30 Nov 04 - 01:43 PM
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Justa Picker 30 Nov 04 - 01:56 PM
Peace 30 Nov 04 - 02:01 PM
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Subject: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 12:07 PM

When the time comes and death grabs ya buy the short n curlies, what do you want on your gravestone to leave your mark in history?

I'd have

"Gone for lunch"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 12:08 PM

Still thirsty.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Pauline L
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 12:21 PM

Something that Martin Luther King said in one of his last sermons (?): In my life, I have tried to love my fellow man.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Clinton Hammond
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 12:27 PM

"He's Not Here"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Sorcha
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 12:39 PM

Nobody Home


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Dead Horse
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 12:41 PM

He went peacefully in his sleep,
not screaming like his passengers!

(OK, I stole it, but it fits)


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Mooh
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 12:49 PM

Don't want me or my family to waste our money on a gravestone, a plot, or any other of the trappings of a burial. All I want is a cheap cremation and my ashes spread over one of my favourite places, near both my Dad and my sister. My happiest days were and are spent there, and I hope they always will be.

Don't put no gravestone on my grave. Thanks anyway.

Peace, Mooh.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Schantieman
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 12:53 PM

I want to be buried in a wood with an oak tree planted on top of me. If anyone wants to put anything on the tree, that's up to them - I won't be around!

Steve


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 01:05 PM

No grave or marker for me, thanks. Cremation and scattering.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 01:07 PM

dunno, not really thought about it.
How about="jOhn from Hull-Dead"?


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Cod Fiddler
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 01:07 PM

I told you I was Ill! (Spike Milligan)


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Deckman
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 01:16 PM

My daughter has threatned to put the following on my stone: "Dad went through life an hour early". CHEERS, Bob


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: alanabit
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 01:18 PM

"Sorry, wrong place mate!" I am going to be cremated.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Bill Kennedy
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 01:22 PM

how about 'No Forwarding Address'

I'm with the rest of the cremated/scattered crowd


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: ToulouseCruise
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 01:28 PM

a date sometime in 2090 or so... I think that would make me 122 yrs old... sounds like a record

B


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Clinton Hammond
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 01:35 PM

Or...

"This is a waste of space"

Or

"Reserved"

Or

"Yer standing on my nuts"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 01:43 PM

To paraphrase Clinton Hammond's:

"I'm not here."

Anyway, I'm not planning to have a gravestone.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Toenails John
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 01:47 PM

....Fell asleep on (date)
MAN is he gonna be pissed off when he wakes up


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Chief Chaos
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 01:50 PM

I don't believe you guys have missed two classics:

"What a Long Strange Trip It's Been"

and

"It's worse than that, I'm dead Jim!"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Justa Picker
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 01:56 PM

"He gave to worms and maggots what he refused homosexual men all of his life."


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Peace
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 02:01 PM

Body going to a medical school. Don't care what they do with it.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: grumpy al
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 02:34 PM

I want to be buried at sea, with the proviso that my Ex Wife has to dance on my grave.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Clinton Hammond
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 02:37 PM

Here here brucie!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Catherine Jayne
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 02:42 PM

Im going to be cremated and my ashes scattered in woodland. I want people to plant a tree adn have a party, tell a joke, sing a song and play music. Its not a sad time, its a celebration of my life adn life in general and to see me off on the next leg of my journey!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Geoff the Duck
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 02:45 PM

Somebody else's name....
Quack!!
GtD.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: The Walrus
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 03:04 PM

My first thought was

"Not Just aAnother Suburban W*nker"

but a better (and more accepable) version might be:

"Bits of him live on"

(I've got a muliple doner card - eyes, heart, lungs, liver and whatever else they can salvage - Don't just bury me, break me for spares!)

As for the funeral, I'll go for my family standard; a conventional funeral to say 'Goodbye' the a party afterwards to celbrate the life remembered (I've got money set aside for a barrel).

Walrus


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Scooby Doo
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 03:18 PM

My body is going for medical research so there wont be a funeral as such.But there will be a fine party for everyone to enjoy in my local where ever that will be.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Ebbie
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 03:34 PM

My Work Here is Done
Hi Yo, Silver!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: the fence
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 03:38 PM

"Late again"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,John O'Lennaine
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 04:11 PM

When I was a teenager my mother used to say my headstone should read:

"He meant to do it"

If, why I die, (if I haven't already), I have done it I would like "He did it", and if not, "Still working on it Mum"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 04:30 PM

On Bambi's grave: "The Buck Stops Here"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,amergin
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 04:39 PM

I'm not going to be buried...I'm going to be stuffed and used as a coat rack.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 04:48 PM

Great idea!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,amergin
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 04:52 PM

Maybe they can cut out a portion of my stomache...to be used as a shelving area for all of the william shatner cds...


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Joybell
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 05:12 PM

All you lucky people who got their bookings in early. As I've mentioned before, when we rang them, the medical school here told us "No more donations until after the new year". Still trying to figure out how they know when we're gonna go?

Amergin, A tripe sheving unit. Now you don't see that every day.

If I was to have a gravestone, which I won't (I'll try to hold out until next year) I'd have rather liked:
"Just tell them that you saw me"
From the song of that name. Of course it's not very funny and I do like funny. Maybe the way I sign off at the time of my passing over would be the go. For now it's
                           Cheery-bye, Joy


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: skipy
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 05:21 PM

What ever headstone protective coating they have developed in 500 years time!
eh! perhaps not then!
Skipy


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Bobert
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 05:24 PM

Well, danged...


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: HuwG
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 06:51 PM

"Didn't get up this mornin'..."

;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Chris Green
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 06:57 PM

After a particularly cack gig the other night - "This beats the shit out of playing in Dudley". :)


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 07:02 PM

I've always said that I wanted to be encased in a cylinder of plastic, like a starfish in a biology lab. Encased standing, clothed in some obnoxious thing, both hands raised to about chest level, palms towards my body, middle fingers raised. An eyebolt in the top of the cylinder.

Then they can just drill a hole and stick me in, corking it with a neat cylindrical stone. Therefore, in the future, if anyone says, "Gee, I wonder what he looked like and thought of life?" they can uncork the grave, put a hook into the eyebolt, yank me up, and find out the answers.

(Actually, my driver's license states that anything that's needed can be used -- and my wife knows that. I really don't care about a stone, but if they have one I don't want one of those dinky, silly flat things. I want something that the caretakers have to mow around. And having made the things, I want it done right if it's to be done at all.)


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Shanghaiceltic
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 07:03 PM

Medical science can have my body but whatever bits not used need to be buried.

'Rest in Pieces'


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 07:23 PM

When I'm dead, I'll definitely be stuffed...


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 07:39 PM

1. Died on (insert date)with great reluctance
John Ireland


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: JennyO
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 09:04 PM

200. I thank you.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Joe_F
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 09:06 PM

He got around to everything eventually.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Jeep man
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 09:11 PM

"HE DONE HIS DAMNDEST" JEEP


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Blissfully Ignorant
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 09:16 PM

'It's warmer in Hell'


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: mack/misophist
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 10:25 PM

No epitaph. No stone. Cremation sounds good. Just dump the ashes in the trash. Best would be to drop the body into the middle of a big wilderness and let the animals have it.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: katlaughing
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 10:25 PM

Next?


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: freightdawg
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 10:50 PM

Rats, Geoff. You beat me to it.

My second choice, "Old Pilots Never Die. He Just Landed At The Wrong Airport"

Of course, my headstone is going to be so big that is just the beginning of what I want written on it.

(snigger, snigger)

Freightdawg


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: open mike
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 11:39 PM

IF YOU DO WANT TO DONATE YOUR BODY TO MEDICAL SCIENCE
you need to make prepartaions well before the time.
find the nearest medical facility and find out whqat
their policy is. My parents donated thier bodies and
it was a great feeling to know they were able to help
future medical students.
Some have restrictions on travel time, transportation,
etc. and the people around need to know what arrangements
have been made .


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST
Date: 30 Nov 04 - 11:57 PM

Justa Picker - you're warped!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Justa Picker
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 12:56 AM

Nice of you to notice. :-)


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: chris nightbird childs
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 12:58 AM

"Let yr spirit burn, 'n they'll still smell the smoke when yr gone"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 02:48 AM

Good night, Gracie.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Seamus Kennedy
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 03:47 AM

I've made arrangements to leave my body to medical science (U.MD) but if I did have a headstone, I'd like "Dig me up quick! I'm not dead." Or: "Seamus Kennedy, the World's Greatest Hide-And-Seek Player."
Or:" Seamus Kennedy - died of Narcolepsy. Oh shit! Wait! Dig! Dig!"

Seamus


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Crystal
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 04:35 AM

Hmmm.
I'd have a flat one with "Memorial dancefloor" on it.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 05:04 AM

On the whole I'd rather be in Philadelphia. [ WC Fields ]


eric


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 05:18 AM

I always liked the Derek brimstone line:-
If I should die, think only this of me
In some corner of a foreign field lies...
a plagiarist.

Its a depressing thought alright, a lovely sunny morning like today and the party goes on without us - no one much noticing that we've checked out, and won't be coming back. Like Keats said, here lies one whose name was writ in water....

Like a lot of people here I've left instuctions, I don't want any kind of funeral. People have a chance to say nice things about you when you're alive. that's when it counts.

someone once wrote that Dickens wept over Thackeray's grave, but when they were both alive the and competing with each other, the boxing gloves were off.......an unpleasant side to us a species!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Ellenpoly
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 06:11 AM

So why exactly are you asking this, huh? Do you know something I don't know? Huh? Huh?

I have no intention of being buried. I want my body to be eaten by my friends.

If they refuse, I'll let the medics have me.

Anyone want to sign up now for my brain? It's been only lightly used, and should be quite tasty with a little marinara sauce.

;-D

..xx..e


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: kendall
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 06:11 AM

I KNEW IF I LIVED LONG ENOUGH THIS WOULD HAPPEN


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: muppett
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 07:01 AM

Beneath this sod lies another


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: JennyO
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 07:41 AM

All this talk of dying and gravestones reminded me of a poem - maybe a quote from it somewhere might be apt.

Reincarnation - Wallace McRae

What does reincarnation mean?"
A cowpoke asked his friend.
His pal replied, "It happens when
Yer life has reached its end.
They comb yer hair, and warsh yer neck,
And clean yer fingernails,
And lay you in a padded box                        
Away from life's travails.                

"The box and you goes in a hole,
that's been dug into the ground.
Reincarnation starts in when
Yore planted 'neath a mound.
Them clods melt down, just like yer box,
And you who is inside.
And then yore just beginnin' on
Yer transformation ride.

"In a while the grass'll grow
Upon yer rendered mound.
Till some day on yer moldered grave
A lonely flower is found.
And say a hoss should wander by
And graze upon this flower
That once wuz you, but now's become
Yer vegetative bower.

"The posey that the hoss done ate
Up, with his other feed,
Makes bone, and fat, and muscle
Essential to the steed.
But some is left that he can't use
And so it passes through,
And finally lays upon the ground.
This thing, that once wuz you.

"Then say, by chance, I wanders by
And sees this upon the ground,
And I ponders, and I wonders at,
This object that I found.
I thinks of reincarnation,
Of life, and death, and such,
And come away concludin': Slim,
You ain't changed all that much."


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 09:13 AM

JennyO -- a friend of ours does that recitation at our sessions occasionally. Love it!

Since I can't dispose of my body by slow oxidation in the treetops (I'm afraid of height, anyway), I'm also opting for cremation and scattering. But since I've spent so much of my life studying New England slate gravestones, I really want one as a marker. I'll probably carve it myself if I can't get one of my favorite (living) carvers to do it. Haven't a clue as to what I want on it, though.

Best line I've run into in my meanderings through old graveyards is on the markers for TWO different women in York, Maine -- "She lived desired and died lamented." Probably can't get much better than that!

Linn (the thanatolithologist)


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Ellenpoly
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 09:27 AM

Speaking of old gravestone markers, here's one from my local cemetary which always catches my eye in my regular rambles:

"He Had a Love Affair With Death"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 11:04 AM

He died first:

"Stranger, note as you pass by
As you are now, so once was I
As I am now, so will you be
Prepare for Death and follow me."

And his good friend, next to whom he'd purchased his grave and with whom he'd had a falling out just before he died, passed away and had this as his epitath:

"To follow you I'm not content
For I know not which way you went."


Why not buy a large field somewhere, a sunny field bordered by mountains and the seashore, and turn it into the Mudcat Memorial Field? Graves and gravestones, scatterings, a mausoleum (you want it, you build it), a couple of pubs, picnic tables, gardens, nooks for private moments alone or with others, places to place and sing -- British Columbia, Washington, or Oregon come to mind as places that might have such a place available.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Flash Company
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 11:18 AM

How about:-

I'm a Celebrity, get me out of here!

FC


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Cluin
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 11:22 AM

"Just another dead fucker"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Megan L
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 02:00 PM

My aunt has "you love me best who are happy for me"

some old ones
Here lies the father of 49 he would have had more but he didnt have time.

Here lies Ann Mann she lived and old maid and died an old mann.

here we lie back to back my wife and I and when the final trump shall trill if she gets up then i'll lie still.

Mine "so thats what that button did"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: akenaton
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 03:54 PM

"I have no connection to Huntington Life Scieces"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: beadie
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 04:19 PM

I'm rather partial to the epitaph that Peter O'Toole claims to have appropriated from a note sent to him by his dry-cleaner, . . .

    "it distresses us to return a piece of work uncompleted."



Personally, I'll be cremated, . . . I don't want to unnecessarily take up good fairway.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 05:55 PM

Ship your ashes to me, beadie, and I'll sprinkle them on the 2nd fairway of the Highland Golf Course -- actually, I'll just dump them over my back fence and you'll be in the rough, but what the hell -- most of the golfers around here seem to spend an eternity there.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: harpgirl
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 06:14 PM

WAIT!!! I have to tune my autoharp first!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Big Mick
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 06:24 PM

"Look, he's moving"

Mick


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 07:12 PM

What do I want on my gravestone? Chutney. Or maybe some good salsa. I never eat gravestones without something spicey on them. If there's anything more bland tasting than a gravestone, I don't know what it is.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Chris Green
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 07:15 PM

After having seen "The Vanishing" how about "Dig! Now please!"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Ebbie
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 07:23 PM

This is an outrage! Don't you know who I am?


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Snuffy
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 07:48 PM

I like the one for the village postmistress:

Here lies Martha Jones, spinster and
For forty years postmistress

returned unopened


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Joe_F
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 10:07 PM

George Orwell said that if he were a woman, he would like

Stand close around, ye Stygian set,
With Dirce in one boat conveyed,
Lest Charon, seeing, should forget
That he is old and she a shade.

He said it would almost be worth being dead to have that written about you. I feel the same about this one from Mencken's Quotations:

Here lies Sir Jenkin Grout, who loved his friend, and persuaded his enemy; what his mouth ate, his hand paid for: what his servants robbed, he restored: if a woman gave him pleasure, he supported her in pain: he never forgot his children: and whoso touched his finger, drew after it his whole body.

Mencken also quotes the following by Byron:

Posterity will ne'er survey
A nobler grave than this:
Here lies the bones of Castlereagh:
Stop, traveler, -------.

There is also something to be said for the end of a famous poem by Goethe:

Warte nur, balde
Ruhest du auch.

Be patient: soon you will rest too.

In the real world, tho, I expect to follow my mother to the Boston University School of Medicine.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Peace
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 10:37 PM

Count Dracula

1236-
1458-
1527-
1703-
1823-
1995-


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: mg
Date: 01 Dec 04 - 11:51 PM

stop right where you are and say a prayer to get me out of purgatory. mg


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 02 Dec 04 - 04:41 PM

A number of years ago (I've got the clipping somewhere in my files), a pub was selling final resting places in the brick wall of the pub and under the brick floor.

Jay Smith still owned The Press Room at the time, and I suggested the idea to him. I wanted the spot behind the painting above the bar or maybe a plaque under my favorite bar stool (even though I spend most of my Press Room time holding down a chair in the session/singaround corner).

I know I'd like to have all that conviviality and music around my final resting place.

There's a guy in Boston who has a grave warming ceremony every year. He has a piper lead the parade to the cemetery, then he lies down on his plot for a few minutes, and then everyone retires to the local pub for a pint.

Linn


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 02 Dec 04 - 04:57 PM

Well, I got a few ideas on this...

How about: "What are YOU lookin' at???"

Or: "On Vacation till further notice"

Or a button. A red button. No explanation. When the person pushes the button a panel opens in the gravestone and a fake tommygun pops out and blasts 'em with blank cartridges!!! Then my voice says, "Oh! Sorry about that... I thought it was the North Side gorillas comin' to collect."

I wanta be buried as close to King Kong as I can manage, but I ain't goin' till I'm good and ready!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Pogo
Date: 02 Dec 04 - 09:17 PM

I would have a gravstone laid on the ground

On one side it would have " Please Turn Me Over "

And the other side would have " Thanks...I needed that "

{O)


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Paul Burke
Date: 03 Dec 04 - 04:47 AM

This is widely runoured to be authentic:

Here lies the bones of Elizabeth Moore
Born a virgin, died a whore.
She was aye a virgin at seventeen
A remarkable thing in Aberdeen.

But I want:

He never realised that it's never too late
until it was too late


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Tannywheeler
Date: 03 Dec 04 - 02:43 PM

I intend to be cremated, after they've taken anything healthy enough to be useful to anyone else. If there's any kind of a memorial that my family puts up it should read:
   "Throughout eternity to thee
    A joyful song I'll raise;
    But, oh -- ETERNITY'S TOO SHORT
    To utter all thy praise."
This is the last verse of a poem by Addison (remember paradox in high school Eng. Lit. class?) the whole of which is a hymn in the Episcopal Hymnal(1940 & '82). One of my favorites.    Tw


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Cluin
Date: 03 Dec 04 - 03:37 PM

"I've got Oreos down here..."


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: beadie
Date: 03 Dec 04 - 04:21 PM

Thanks for the offer, Rapaire.    I'll tell the Missus that she won't have to dust my urn every week.

. . . I'd much rather fertilise the fairway (or the rough) than occupy a six by three foot chunk of it with an obstacle in the form of a gravestone impeding the ball's trajectory to the pin.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,stevi
Date: 03 Dec 04 - 05:32 PM

they say that when yer go yer cant take it with you ! if its not their when ive gone ime coming back!

stevi


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Cluin
Date: 05 Dec 04 - 01:48 AM

Being dead sucks


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 05 Dec 04 - 03:55 AM

I don't know about anybody else but I'm finding this current crop of macabre postings and intimations of mortality......well a little unnerving. On blokes on about what to do with his instruments when he's dead , and this one.

Come back sir jOhn with his dead cats, etc


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 05 Dec 04 - 10:40 AM

Cliun - How do you know that for sure?


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Cluin
Date: 05 Dec 04 - 02:37 PM

Coz it'll be on the gravestone.

Y'know, written in stone an' all that?


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Peace
Date: 05 Dec 04 - 07:33 PM

Get it written using the futhorc alphabet and really screw 'em up. (And put the birth/death dates to 1,200 years ago.) Drive someone nuts after you're gone.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 05 Dec 04 - 08:01 PM

Oh, I see... :-)

I've been thinking of putting a photo of Martin Gibson on my gravestone, so as to scare away potential grave-robbers. (Not that there'd be any point robbing my grave...)


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Kendall
Date: 06 Dec 04 - 08:11 AM

I knew if I lived long enough something like this would happen


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: mooman
Date: 06 Dec 04 - 08:16 AM

"Impermanence" or just plain blank will do me fine.

Peace

moo


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Amos
Date: 06 Dec 04 - 08:40 AM

Anonymous Guest


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Art Thieme
Date: 07 Dec 04 - 01:36 AM

HE KNEW WHAT FOLK MUSIC IS (and M.G. didn't!)


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Cluin
Date: 07 Dec 04 - 01:58 AM

On a grave in the East Dalhousie Cemetery, Nova Scotia:
Here lies
Ezekial Aikle
Age 102
The Good
Die Young.


In a Ribbesford, England, cemetery:
Anna Wallace
The children of Israel wanted bread
And the Lord sent them manna,
Old clerk Wallace wanted a wife,
And the Devil sent him Anna.


A widow wrote this epitaph in a Vermont cemetery:
Sacred to the memory of
my husband John Barnes
who died January 3, 1803
His comely young widow, aged 23, has
many qualifications of a good wife, and
yearns to be comforted.


Epitaph for a loving husband, by his widow:
Rest in peace - Until we meet again.

From Shropshire, England:
Here lies the body of Martha Elias
Always busy, but not very pious
She lived to the age of threescore and ten
And gave to the worms what she refused to men.


In Devon, England:
Here lie I, by the chancel door,
Here lie I, because I'm poor,               
The farther in, the more you pay,
Yet here lie I, as warm as they.


One from a graveyard in Sargentville, Maine:
Sacred to the memory of Elisha Philbrook and his wife
Beneath these stones do lie, back to back, my wife and I
When the last trumpet the air shall fill,
If she gets up, I'll just lie still.


From Kilmurry, Ireland:
This stone was raised by Sarah's lord,
Not Sarah's virtues to record,
For they're well known to all the town,
But it was raised to keep her down.


In a Silver City, Nevada, cemetery:
Here lays Butch,
We planted him raw.
He was quick on the trigger,
But slow on the draw.


A lawyer's epitaph in England:
Sir John Strange
Here lies an honest lawyer,
And that is Strange.


Someone determined to be anonymous in Stowe, Vermont:
I was somebody.
Who, is no business
Of yours.


Here lies the body of an atheist...
All dressed up and no place to go


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,daylia
Date: 07 Dec 04 - 07:20 AM

Two Beings clothed in Light saying "She is not here".    :-)


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Donuel
Date: 07 Dec 04 - 12:23 PM

"I thank my parents without whom I would have never come this far"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,JTT
Date: 07 Dec 04 - 01:02 PM

I think I'd like something like:

"For sale or rent, 300-year-old gravestone. Owner still alive and can't be bothered storing it."


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,The Original Web Geek
Date: 07 Dec 04 - 01:10 PM

Mr. T Ate My Balls


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 07 Dec 04 - 01:16 PM

So do you believe in re-incarnation???
These two guys were talking in a hotel I was in.....One asked the other what he was doing there and he told him he was in London for the
"Conference on Reincarnation".
He said "I have paid £5500 altogether to come from America and stay at this expensive hotel, just for the conference".
The man he was talking to said..."That is a lot of money"
To which the American man replied "Well I thought, what the heck man You only live once!!!!....................
Best wishes.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Dec 04 - 05:46 PM

Well, the fact is you DO only live once as the specific role you are playing in this life....regardless of reincarnation. So it makes sense either way.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Chris Green
Date: 07 Dec 04 - 07:07 PM

There's a story about a bloke in Yorkshire whose wife died. He wanted on the gravestone under her name "She was thine". He went to see the grave and the mason had put on the stone "She was thin." So he rang the mason and told he'd left the E out. He went back the following week and it read "Eeee, she was thin!" :)


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Juan P-B
Date: 08 Dec 04 - 06:57 PM

My Missus is as houseproud as they come so when I go I'm gonna be cremated and have my ashes scattered on our front room carpet

Then there was they gay who died - His loving partner had him cremated then mixed him into a Vindaloo Curry just so that he could tear his arse up one last time

Juan P-B

PS - Nice to see Martine Gibbon is still getting up peoples snotters!!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: kendall
Date: 09 Dec 04 - 11:16 AM

On a stone in Tombstone Arizona:

He called Bill Smith a liar.

and:
Here lies Fred. He's dead, there's no more to be said.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Mingulay
Date: 09 Dec 04 - 11:18 AM

WHAT, NO ENCORE!!!!

or

THIS IS A GRAVE SITUATION.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,DOC ROGERS (DOCROGER@MAINE.RR.COM)
Date: 23 Oct 05 - 02:47 PM

Your original message says that you are one of (if not the only) people still SINGING this song.
I am impressed out of my mind!
I didn't think anybody still knew this song.
As for the male singers referenced as having sung and/or recorded the piece, that is begging the question. The lyrics hardly conduce a male speaker (though I have to admit that my devotion to the song has persuaded me to sing it every now and then).
thanks for your note &
best regards &
keep on keepin on
doc


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Peace
Date: 23 Oct 05 - 02:48 PM

Was kinda hoping for

b. 1947- d. 2057


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Mr Red
Date: 23 Oct 05 - 04:07 PM

"If you can read this YOU ARE TOO DAMN CLOSE"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: bobad
Date: 23 Oct 05 - 04:25 PM

You can have your body turned into a permanent work of art.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Firecat
Date: 23 Oct 05 - 05:18 PM

When I eventually go (hopefully not before 5 January 2084, my 100th birthday) I'd like a process I read about in the paper. First the body is dipped into liquid nitrogen, then is gently shaken so it becomes a powder. A magnet is used to get rid of any metal (fillings, false joints etc), and the powder is put into a coffin made of potato or maize starch. This is buried and a tree is planted in the soil above the coffin. After about a year, the coffin has biodegraded and turned into compost. A plaque shows who is being grown on.

The plaque should read either "She grew on people, now something's growing on her", or "Now, weary traveller, rest your head, For just like me, you're utterly dead".


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Peace
Date: 23 Oct 05 - 06:27 PM

Sounds like a plan. What's it cost?


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Oct 05 - 07:15 PM

Actually, I want to be encased in plastic, like those starfish and things in a high school biology lab. I want to be standing up when this is done and the plastic made into a cylinder.

A hookeye should be placed in the plastic, and a hole drilled to accomodate the cylinder. On top will be a cylindrical gravestone giving my name, dates (birth and death, not all of those girls), and a few facts about me -- my Nobel Peace Prize, a list of my Grammys and Oscars, etc. The epitath will read "Still thirsty!" or "Returned to Sender" or something equally short.

BUT! When folks in the future wonder what I looked like, all they have to do is pull out the gravestone, hook a derrick or wrecker or whatever to the eyebolt, and hoist away! Up I'll come, looking as natural as the day I was put into the plastic.

My eyes open, mouth in a nice smile, both middle fingers upraised....


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: gnu
Date: 23 Oct 05 - 08:26 PM

Get off me!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Peace
Date: 23 Oct 05 - 08:29 PM

"What do you want on your gravestone?"

The bodies of my enemies. That would be nice.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Joe_F
Date: 23 Oct 05 - 09:09 PM

inanimate

inaminute

--- Joe Fineman    joe_f@verizon.net

||: Sexual morality is properly a department of hospitality. :||


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Stephen L. Rich
Date: 24 Oct 05 - 05:10 AM

It should say, "After a lifetime as an entertainer you'd think that I'd be used to this by now."

Stephen Lee


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 24 Oct 05 - 05:27 AM

Gone fishing.

eric


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Janie
Date: 24 Oct 05 - 10:27 AM

"27 years in therapy....
Almost cured"

or

"Never voted for a winning candidate in a major election"

(both from Matt Groenig's "Life in Hell"

Janie


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Black belt caterpillar wrestler
Date: 24 Oct 05 - 06:27 PM

I think I would like -
"For Sale Gravestone. Owner no longer needs as has recovered."


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: bobad
Date: 24 Oct 05 - 06:52 PM

Another epitaph at Boot Hill ;

Here lies Lester Moore
No Les no Moore


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: LilyFestre
Date: 24 Oct 05 - 07:52 PM

Beloved Wife, Friend and Mother

Michelle


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Noddy
Date: 25 Oct 05 - 11:44 AM

Vacant, Available for long lease.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: NH Dave
Date: 25 Oct 05 - 02:04 PM

Born 19NN, Died 2065.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Joe_F
Date: 25 Oct 05 - 09:40 PM

Peace: "My grave's no bad: they've put intill't / Twa o the Sassenachs I killt. / I'll kill them again as soon's the horn / Toots on the Resurrection morn. -- Hugh MacDiarmid"

--- Joe Fineman    joe_f@verizon.net

||: His sunburn will finally unburn, But he's burned in the moonlight for keeps. :||


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Chief Chaos
Date: 26 Oct 05 - 01:52 PM

After a pretty bad accident with a bus I came up with the following:

Here lay the remains of old Dave H.
Killed by an oncoming bus
He should have listened to our add
And left the driving to us!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: lady penelope
Date: 26 Oct 05 - 03:00 PM

Yes I rather fancy the liquid nitrogen thing for all the bits that neither usefull nor wanted. I don't want a grave stone as such, but a wooden plaque grown into a tree with the words "I ain'tnt dead" would amuse me no end.........

TTFN Lady P.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: WFDU - Ron Olesko
Date: 26 Oct 05 - 03:31 PM

Back in 10 minutes


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T
Date: 26 Oct 05 - 03:35 PM

I want an emergency exit, so I can leave whenever I choose.

There is a country graveyard with a stone which says

"Here lies Emily Smith, spinster of this parish, and our postmistress for forty years......Returned unopened".

Don T.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: 42
Date: 26 Oct 05 - 04:29 PM

a picnic.

j


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST
Date: 26 Oct 05 - 07:14 PM

VACANCY


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Dave Earl
Date: 27 Oct 05 - 02:55 AM

Was it Spike Milligan who said he wanted :-

See, I told you I wasn't well.

??


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 27 Oct 05 - 08:08 AM

Spike Milligans epitaph is " I Told You I Was Ill " but they wouldn't allow it in english, so it's written in Irish gaelic.

eric


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Chief Chaos
Date: 27 Oct 05 - 02:58 PM

Lady Penelope - Just don't go borrowing too long. Sometimes they don't come back.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: MMario
Date: 27 Oct 05 - 03:08 PM

No trespassing.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 27 Oct 05 - 03:10 PM

jOhn from Hull, 1967-2067.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: MMario
Date: 27 Oct 05 - 03:11 PM

plan on dying young then John?


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 28 Oct 05 - 07:32 AM

I found this epitaph in a book by Ed Cray, it's from the 17th century,

If one must die as oft as breath departs,
Then he must often die who often farts,
And if to die be but to lose one's breath,

Then death's a fart, and so a fart for death.

eric


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Donuel
Date: 28 Oct 05 - 04:51 PM

If you donate correctly there should be nothing left to bury.

Who knows, some crack pot may invent organ tatoos that could really freak some doctors out one day.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Firecat
Date: 28 Oct 05 - 08:20 PM

Not sure on the price of the liquid nitrogen thing, but hopefully it will become the norm.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,TheBanjoist
Date: 29 Oct 05 - 05:52 PM

I will be taken back to the Rez and placed on my elevated burial bed and covered in my buffalo blanket. In a couple of years what's ever left of my bones will be crushed and mixed with the ash of all my dogs and we will be put in a river that goes to the sea...Then we will be forgotten.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,lotta dust
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 02:56 AM

there are three i want the first one is actully my name

"here lies Lotta Dust"

"ouch your standing on my head"

"here lies John Yeast pardone me for not riseing


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: MuddleC
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 05:42 AM

'Standing room only' (train/bus conductor)

'life's a bitch, -but now I've died' (biker)

'dam, -it was the red wire' (bomb disposal)

'scythes sharpened while you wait'

'wake me in the morning'

'jus' when I wuz getting the hang of it..'

'now will you stop sending those tax demands?'


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Mr Fox
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 07:21 AM

I'm sure His Bobness won't mind if I nick a quote from one of his songs:

The bottles are done
We've killed each one
The table's full and overflowed
And the corner sign says it's closing time
So I'll say farewell and be down the road.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: *daylia*
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 07:31 AM

ON SABBATICAL

*BE RIGHT BACK*


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 08:46 AM

"Out to lunch. Please leave message."


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: lady penelope
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 01:09 PM

"I can see right up your nose......."


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 01:11 PM

Vacancy. Call for information.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Cluin
Date: 22 Nov 05 - 11:53 AM

I tried and tried and tried...

And this is the thanks I get?


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Gervase
Date: 22 Nov 05 - 12:01 PM

Lichen and birdshit, the same as everyone else, I suppose.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Ebbie
Date: 22 Nov 05 - 08:35 PM

'Look for me in the Mountains- I am not here.'


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST
Date: 22 Nov 05 - 10:25 PM

"He came, he saw..said it could have been better"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST
Date: 23 Nov 05 - 06:17 PM

DANCE HERE


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Toni_Init!
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 06:48 PM

Well...This sucks!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,punkfolkrocker
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 10:12 AM

the head on a spike

of the little drugged up speeding boy-racer shite

who'll probably have run me down and killed me..


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Donuel
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 02:05 PM

due to creamation, you are breathing me now.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 02:40 PM

No gravestone! No grave!

Just cremate me and deliver my ashes to "Her Majesty's Revenue & Customs" with a note saying "I hope you are happy now. You've got the lot, you Bastards.

Don T.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 04:40 PM

"Your opinion means diddly to me."


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 04:47 PM

I am going to be buried at sea, so all the people who have said they would love to dance on my grave are welcome to do so.
Giok


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Amos
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 05:59 PM

"AHJ -- 1945 - ????

"He Ain't Daid Yet!!!"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Sep 07 - 12:02 PM

How about, "What are YOU lookin' at?"

I liked Timon's motto on his grave:

"Timon the misanthrope am I below.
Go and revile me, stranger, only go."


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Genie
Date: 27 Sep 07 - 04:04 PM

Well, since I want my body to be used for medical research at some university, I guess what the 'inscription' should be is:

"This WILL be on the test."


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Sep 07 - 04:05 PM

What? All of it??? What if some local Dr Frankenstein makes off with your brain and uses it for some unholy purpose? ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,MarkS
Date: 28 Sep 07 - 12:00 AM

Just see that my grave is kept clean.

(After all, this is a music site)


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Catherine Jayne
Date: 28 Sep 07 - 03:48 AM

Just reread this thread and I still stick by what I said years before!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Bill the sound
Date: 28 Sep 07 - 09:20 PM

This is a cenotaph
I wont be here for years yet


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Mad Jock
Date: 29 Sep 07 - 07:46 AM

AVAILABLE FOR LONG TERM RENT.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Euan
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 06:36 PM

"He Lol'd in life, he Lol's in death"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: skipy
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 08:06 PM

Bird shit?
Skipy
What would you do if a bird shit on your windscreen?
Well, I'd never go out with her again!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: aussiebloke
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 03:54 AM

A parking meter, showing 'expired' should do the trick, or I'd be happy with the simple words 'Kids liked him'.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: bankley
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 07:14 AM

hopefully ,not a lot of bird shit...


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Folk Form # 1
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 03:42 PM

Roland Kirk, the jazz musician, said that when he died, he wanted to be cremated so that people could smoke his ashes and get high. Inpractical, when you think about it. Ashes don't burn as they've already been burnt. Still nice thought, I suppose.

On Yeat's grave, it quotes one of his own poems:

Cast a cold eye
on life, on death.
Horseman, pass by.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,sinky
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 03:57 PM

went to heaven and all i got was this lousy gravestone


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Rowan
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 04:58 PM

Live and love life!
You're a long time dead.

Cheers, Rowan.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: topical tom
Date: 05 Dec 07 - 01:08 PM

If in life you held me dear, play some folk and bluegrass here.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Geordie-Peorgie
Date: 05 Dec 07 - 02:52 PM

Aah'm only stopping for one drink!!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Amos
Date: 05 Dec 07 - 02:56 PM

"He Never Believed Bush" would do.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Mark Ross
Date: 05 Dec 07 - 03:15 PM

"MARK ROSS
FOLKSINGER
MORS ANTE SERVITIUM,*
ILLEGITIMI NON CARBORUNDOM**
TAKE IT EASY, BUT TAKE IT!"


*Death Before Employment
**Don't Let The Bastards Grind You Down

Mark Ross


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: autolycus
Date: 05 Dec 07 - 04:58 PM

If Imhave one, perhaps,

    HOW VERY INTERESTING THAT WAS

   a quote from The Goon Show.


One I remember from long ago,


    here lies the body
    of Jonathan Blake
    who stepped on the gas
    instead of the brake


   Ivor


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Alec James
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 08:58 PM

Thanks Anyway


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: olddude
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 09:06 PM

Eternal rest at the best Hot Dog Stand ever.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Joe_F
Date: 29 Aug 08 - 09:02 PM

First you go to hell, then your body rots, and then you die.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: olddude
Date: 29 Aug 08 - 09:09 PM

I read that some celeb had
"I told you I was sick"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Ed T
Date: 29 Aug 08 - 09:19 PM

A beer stien, right on top.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: bobad
Date: 29 Aug 08 - 09:25 PM

A button which, when pressed, blows a raspberry AKA a Bronx cheer or an unvoiced linguolabial trill.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: vectis
Date: 30 Aug 08 - 12:49 PM

On a Sussex grave
"He was never dull"

Not a bad epitaph.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Lizzie Cornish 1
Date: 30 Aug 08 - 02:24 PM

From olddude:

>>I read that some celeb had
"I told you I was sick" <<

It was our beloved Spike Milligan, Dan...greatly missed over here in the UK. He was just the funniest man. Suffered terrible depression in his life though, often locking himself away for weeks at a time, but when he came back to us, he made us cry with laughter. He was one of The Goons, along with Harry Seccombe, Peter Sellers and Michael Bentine. He was all around, everywhere, in my childhood...and he was still there making my daughter laugh, so many years later.

If only we could have him back again! Still, we sell loads of books about Spike in The National Trust shop, so he's still very much loved and far from forgotten about.


I told you I was ill

Spike Milligan on Room 101

The Goonshow - What Time Is It Eccles?


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Aug 08 - 06:51 PM

I have no desire to have a gravestone. As soon as I'm done here I'll be busy dealing with the next thing anyway, so why worry about gravestones?


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: mg
Date: 31 Aug 08 - 02:52 AM

I don't know if I said this or not..someone else said it long before...she never had any fun (substitute great accomplishments) but she had state benefits....mg


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Flo, Kayla and Emily!!
Date: 10 Nov 08 - 05:52 AM

What do you mean im dead?!!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Dani
Date: 10 Nov 08 - 09:21 AM

"86"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Donuel
Date: 10 Nov 08 - 09:51 AM

Human nature being what it is...

just 5 words


DO NOT LICK THIS STONE !














(A small three foot lime stone/marble marker will have been marninated in a mixture of X and LSD for two months. Small side drilling holes will insure total absorbtion. A small wishing well type roof will be erected to keep the rain off the stone and the bottom of the stone that is beneath the earth will be coated with poly urethane)


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: goatfell
Date: 10 Nov 08 - 09:54 AM

in very small letters 'YOU ARE STANDING N MY BALLS' or as Spike Milligan says ' I TOLD YOU I WAS ILL'


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: frogprince
Date: 10 Nov 08 - 11:25 AM

Lady Penelope's "I can see right up your nose......." triggered one other possibility I hadn't thought of before: in fairly small print, "Nice panties!".


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Justin Urqhart
Date: 10 Nov 08 - 01:48 PM

"Justin Urqhart. He spoke his mind and few liked it".


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Lizzie Cornish 1
Date: 10 Nov 08 - 02:19 PM

"Uh Oh!"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: George Papavgeris
Date: 10 Nov 08 - 02:28 PM

I'd like young couples on my gravestone... Then I can be a dirty really old man!

But WRITTEN on the gravestone, I want the following:

"Now that I am silent
One thing above all I regret:
Not singing those songs
That nobody has written yet"

But more realistically, I'd be happy enough if they spell the surname right!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: George Papavgeris
Date: 10 Nov 08 - 02:29 PM

Of course, there's always

ARE WE THERE YET?


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Cluin
Date: 10 Nov 08 - 02:32 PM

"Fortunately, I keep my feathers numbered for just such an emergency..."


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Big Mick
Date: 10 Nov 08 - 02:36 PM

He was a Union Organizer,
With the blood of workers in his veins...

Paraphrase of a line from Bill Gallaher's "The Ballad of Ginger Goodwin".

But not too soon..

All the best,

Mick


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Ed T
Date: 10 Nov 08 - 04:03 PM

Was it all worth it?
I'll get back to you on that.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Nov 08 - 06:47 PM

How about a blank date of death?


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Melissa
Date: 10 Nov 08 - 06:51 PM

if you can read this
you're facing east


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Justin Urqhart
Date: 10 Nov 08 - 07:36 PM

I certainly wouldn't want the mods, on this site to visit my final resting place and read my headstone. Unless it's nice, sweet and to their liking, off it comes !

No problem, proves fact & truth hurts.
    You're starting to learn, Justin. Of course, I would imagine that in your grave, you'd be a permanent resident with a proven identity. Can't say the same for your presence here.
    But I suppose if you post David Duke shit in the cemetery, you'll get deleted there, too.
    -Joe Offer-


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Gurney
Date: 10 Nov 08 - 09:30 PM

'Oh. Sorry, false alarm.'
Won't have one anyway.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Genie
Date: 10 Nov 08 - 09:39 PM

Ah, yes, Mick -- not too soon!

I want mine to say "1942 - 2042" or something like that.


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Jayto
Date: 11 Nov 08 - 02:32 PM

"Oh God uhm you look pissed."

I heard that when WC Fields was on his death bed a man approached him and noticed he was reading the Bible. He asked him about it knowing he had never been religious. He asked what he was doing. WC never looked up and replied "Looking for a loophole."

I guess seriously I would want how much I love my kids. That is all that really matters to me so I would want it forever in stone. So everytime they visit my sight I could tell them in a way that I love them. I have accomplished alot in music. Music was my one love forever until I held my 1st born. After that music took a back seat and has for 10 years now. I can't imagine not being able to tell my 3 kids that I love them. So when I go out I want it on my stone so they can at least read it everytime they visit and know I had it put there because I could no longer say it but my love for them remains eternal.

Ok off the mushy stuff lol


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,Guest from Sanity
Date: 12 Nov 08 - 02:50 AM

I might be dead..but I'm ahead of you!


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: GUEST,The black belt caterpillar wrestler
Date: 12 Nov 08 - 07:57 AM

"If you don't like the progressive problems associated with becoming older, consider, you are looking at the alternative".


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Nov 08 - 09:26 AM

Here Lies You Know Who

1945 - Good Lord, he's still out there!
(And he's still thirsty.)


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: goatfell
Date: 12 Nov 08 - 02:16 PM

Who are you looking at?


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Nov 08 - 02:53 PM

Post No Bills


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Peter the Squeezer
Date: 14 Nov 08 - 04:54 PM

In times (long) past, all the old cinema organists used to have thier own signature tune, so that when they came up on the lift from the pit, the audience could tell who was playing.
It has become a sort of tradition, that when one of these old timers passes on, at the moment of committal during their funeral, somebody will get on the crematorium chapel organ, and play thier signature tune as the coffin dissappears.
Some years ago, the body of one of these dear departed musicians was thus despatched to the strains of ...




wait for it ...






it's good ...





"Smoke gets in your eyes"


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Subject: RE: BS: What do you want on your gravestone?
From: Ed T
Date: 14 Nov 08 - 05:26 PM

I voted for MacCain/Palin...and did not get better!


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Mudcat time: 14 May 12:11 PM EDT

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