BS: Banana-peeling 101

Subject: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: GUEST,Locus
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 06:19 PM

Okay, so what is the best way to start peeling a banana?

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Barry Finn
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 06:26 PM

with one hand on each end, then bite the middle. Says Chong the Chimp

Take a sharp thumb nail & score the banana from top to bottom, 3x. Says Barney Babboon

I'd like to know what you plan on doing with the peeled banana before I offer up any more advice?

Barry

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Mr Red
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 06:39 PM

Orangutans actually peel from the other end to most humans (ie the end without the stalk). Maybe they know something.

Get yer fill of them - the most popular banana variety is Cavendish - it was preferred when it's preecessor succumbed to a rolling blight. Now Cavendish is susceptable to a fugus which stunts their growth. There is no known cure and it is taking over fast.

So why don't they just breed a new variety?

Well I will tell you - banana plants (not trees!) are propagated vegitatively - they are infertile - seeds are as numerous as hen's teeth. So breeding is expensive and slow to non-existent.

The most likely result is the demise of the banana as we know it.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Little Hawk
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 06:42 PM

Hold the banana firmly in your right hand. Using your left thumbnail, pierce the skin of the banana at the base of the stem and twist the stem sideways with your left hand. The skin will break, allowing you to pull down the peel on one side with your left hand. Pull peel 1/3 to halfway down. Use right hand to pull down other sections of peel to same point. Eat upper part of banana. Follow same procedure down until banana is finished. Discard peel.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 06:44 PM

Apply to Christchurch Unversity where an ex-policeman will produce a validation for a degree level course based on police procedures and avoindig black-letter law on the subject.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 06:48 PM

You're supposed to peel them?????????

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 06:53 PM

The banana as we know it has demised here - only rich folks can afford it since 95% of the banana crop was destroyed by Cyclone Larry earlier this year. They are now around $12 to $14 a kilo, instead of around $4.

The growers outside the tropics were getting lotsa' money (as were the middlemen) for their product, pricing bananas out of most folks' grocery baskets. Fast food shops & cafes were leaving banana smoothies off their menus due to the cost.

Fortunately I had lotsa' bananas in my freezer as I buy the old bruised ones lotsa folk don't want, peel them & freeze them for use in my weekday porrige & Sunday smoothies. By just using them for smoothies, I have eked them out.

Recently I saw some at $10, but I still have stocks! This seems to imply that one day the buckets of old 'nanas will be back then YUM, banana porrige!

sandra

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Kaleea
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 07:28 PM

Little Hawk, you forgot the salt & pepper!

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: John O'L
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 07:43 PM

Orangutans actually peel from the other end to most humans (ie the end without the stalk)

So orangutans peel most humans from the end with the stalk?

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Amos
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 07:46 PM

Ain't no orangoutang 'peeled to me anyway, not from either end, no how.

A

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: bobad
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 09:07 PM

In case you were wondering.

FOOD AND DRUG ADMINISTRATION
FOR RELEASE FRIDAY, MAY 26, 1967

Was it all a hippie hoax?

A laboratory apparatus "smoked" dried banana peels for more than three weeks and never did get high, the Food and Drug Administration reported today.

"The Bureau of Science has made an analysis of the smoke obtained from several recipes for dried banana peel and concentrated banana juice," the FDA said. "There were no detectable quantitieg of known hallucinogens in these materials."

The FDA began the laboratory test after its Bureau of Drug Abuse Control received reports that dried scrapings from banana peels were being smoked for their hallucinogenic effect.

The FDA's "smoklng machine" consisted of a series of tubes and retorts which trapped the smoke. The chemical components of the smoke were examined by ultraviolet and infrared spectrophotometric procedures.

Small amounts of known hallucinogens were introduced during some tests to determine whather the substances could be detected in the smoke. The added hallucinogens were recovered and identified. But none was found in the tests of banana peels alone.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Bill D
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 09:14 PM

since I usually eat only half a banana...(usually on cereal)...I make a slit just below the stem...maybe 3" long. Fold the stem over to expose the top ½ of banana....remove that piece.....replace cover to preserve bottom half until tomorrow. Try THAT, Chongo!

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 09:26 PM

I saw a movie once of a woman and a banana and, well, never mind.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Q (Frank Staplin)
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 09:41 PM

Remember the old song? "I like bananas- because they have no bones."

I prefer the small, 'lady' bananas but they seldom appear in our markets. They are very popular in Hawaii.
Genetic modifications on the Cavendish, or use of one of the other 300 varieties, ensures that bananas will be with us as long as humans continue to eat them. Squash that urban legend, and remember that the "New Scientist" is not a scholarly journal.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: mack/misophist
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 10:03 PM

At the present time, no replacement for the Cavendish banana is planned. The growers - who are the ones most involved - are convinced the job is impossible without genetic engineering. They don't think people would buy them and refuse to waste their money creating them. There are a raft of other banana types but the standard table banana seems to be doomed.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: GUEST, Topsie
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 04:59 AM

When I was a child there was a fashion for inserting a pin through the banana skin at intervals in order to cut the fruit inside (then remove the pin). You could then 'amaze your friends' by peeling the banana, which would be ready sliced.

mack/masophist - I like the idea of a raft made of different types of bananas.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 07:00 AM

A similar trick was with an apple - you used a needle and thread then peeled the apple.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 08:52 AM

We tried the same thing with a pineapple, a big needle, and fishing line.

Didn't work.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 01:57 PM

I've found that a Delta bandsaw equipped with an eight-tooth-per-inch blade makes short work of even the most stubborn banana.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: fat B****rd
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 02:48 PM

Totally comprehensive, Little Hawk. That's perzackly how do it.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Bill D
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 03:27 PM

"Delta bandsaw equipped with an eight-tooth-per-inch blade "

gee...I have only a 4 tooth per inch blade. It makes banana puree, though....

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: GUEST,Jack Campin
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 04:25 PM

I once read the surgical protocol for emergency treatment of acute priapism.

There are two successive things to try: first, stabbing a very thin-bladed knife directly downward through the glans on each side of the urethral opening, and if that doesn't work, making lengthwise incisions in each side of the spongy tissue on the underside of the penis.

If you have a Swiss Army knife or similar on you, demonstrating this on a banana is a great way to liven up a flagging conversation during the fruit course.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: frogprince
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 10:14 PM

I walked down the Sunset Strip with a Navy shipmate just after"Mellow Yellow" turned up on the airwaves. There were at least a couple of supermarkets with specials on bananas posted prominently. I always wondered whether the point of the song was to see how many silly hippies could be conned into smoking bananas, or if it was to see how much the paranoid anti-hippies would freak out about a new drug menace. Maybe a little of each?

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: GUEST,Lowkey
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 11:33 PM

I work in a predominantly male environment. scene dining room with around forty hungry males noisily eating, enter one of about three females on board. She picked up a banana and very slowly peeled a strip off, turned banana round and peeled another strip off, noise level drops considerably. Peeling process is repeated until banana is fully exposed, quite quiet now. woman then gently licked the banana, absolute silence. She then very very slowly put the banana into her mouth, looked around the dining room and suddenly bit the banana in half. Loud gasps all round.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Oct 06 - 01:15 AM

The problem with Little Hawk's otherwise detailed instructions is that when he goes to use his "right hand to pull down other sections of peel", the bananna will fall to the floor because the right hand is what is firmly holding on to the bananna.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 11 Oct 06 - 06:30 AM

No more bananananas? (I know how to spell it, just not when to stop)

How will Sex Ed classes demostrate the correct ways of wearing condoms now? And will it make a more realistic expectation for the girls in the class?

Or is that why the Fundies are phasing out sex ed in favour of abstinence - because of the lack of banananananas?

And does anyone actually eat those bananananananas after sex ed classes have finished with them?

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 11 Oct 06 - 08:00 AM

"phasing out sex ed in favour of abstinence - because of the lack"

No - Kenny the Carrot is prepared to act as a, pardon the expression, 'stand-in'...

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 11 Oct 06 - 09:28 AM

Is there any subject which mudcat can't drift round to sex in short order? Not that this is a bad thing....

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Peace
Date: 11 Oct 06 - 11:21 AM

Fuck the banana. Listen to this.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 11 Oct 06 - 04:33 PM

Do what to the banananannaa?

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 11 Oct 06 - 08:19 PM

Orang-utans do it the right way. Much easier, unless the banana is over-ripe.

Mind, the only time I ever handed a banana to an orang-utan, he removed the peel, ate it, and handed the fruit to the keeper. I don't know if he was taking the best bit for himself, or being nice to the keeper.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Oct 06 - 09:26 PM

Way to go, Guest! ;-) I was wondering if anyone would catch that.

(You can actually do it either way around...and chimps can do it using their feet too!)

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 12 Oct 06 - 08:12 AM

Liz, can you really do spell banana, or do you just prefer it longer?

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 12 Oct 06 - 10:01 AM

Q admonished us, in part:

Squash that urban legend, and remember that the "New Scientist" is not a scholarly journal.

What's with the "New Scientist"?   It has not been mentioned before Q said the above.

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: GUEST
Date: 12 Oct 06 - 10:06 AM

He meant Nude Scientist.

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 13 Oct 06 - 05:56 AM

Nude scientist? Please, no... please tell me Micca hasn't done it again....


Oh dear God, it'll take forever to erase THAT image!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Banana-peeling 101
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 13 Oct 06 - 06:49 AM

Perhaps someone could suggest another inage to wipe that from your mind....


:-)