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BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN
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Subject: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: JenEllen Date: 27 Jun 03 - 02:34 PM "Wow, it's been a long time since we've used this place....."(but with a wave of the magical Mudcat Wand, the place is sparkley clean and ready for party-goers). "I heard there was going to be chocolate, guacamole, margaritas, and daquiris arriving soon, so I thought I'd bring these cookies. Yes, they are, in fact, what they appear to be. I can't help it if the only cookie cutters I have are the "BIG DICK'S" cutters that my sister gave to me at my own bachelorette shin-dig. They aren't too obscene, because they also doubled as 'hatchets' for a Cub Scout meeting that I didn't know was going to be at my house. Here, as everywhere in life, it's all in the frosting." "That would qualify as something old, I guess. Something new? Well, what could be better than new love? Borrowed.....hmmm.....We'll just 'borrow' a couple of quarters from the till and punch up the jukebox. For starters: A-eleventyseven Stevie Wonder---For Once In My Life. Blue......jello in the pit, of course. And after the obligatory pint-n-yer-honor, I can kneel on the barstool and hiccup: If I leave all for thee, wilt thou exchange And be all to me? Shall I never miss Home-talk and blessing and the common kiss That comes to each in turn, nor count it strange, When I look up, to drop on a new range Of walls and floors, another home than this? Nay, wilt thou fill that place by me which is Filled by dead eyes too tender to know change? That's hardest. If to conquer love, has tried To conquer grief, tries more, as all things prove; For grief indeed is love and grief beside. Alas, I have grieved, so I am hard to love. Yet love me--wilt thou? Open thine heart wide, And fold within the wet wings of thy dove." (congrats Mortee and Allan!) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: MMario Date: 27 Jun 03 - 02:38 PM carefully sorting the "hatchet" and "big dick" cookies out onto seperate platters - sorry - they were making me nervous mixed in together like thatCan anyone tell me what Morti's favorite colour is? Or Failing that, Allan's? or both? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Allan C. Date: 27 Jun 03 - 02:49 PM I do hope this isn't designed to be purely a bachelorette party because I really could use an opportunity to duck in out of the heat and to suck down a pint or two. Mario, thanks for sorting the cookies. I felt the same way. Unless I am mistaken, Morti's favorite color is purple (the color of chocolate undoubtedly being second) and my own is/are blue or varying shades of it but I also very much like wearing bright red. (I like chocolate too but rarely eat any other than semi-sweet.) We differ also in our metalic tastes in that she prefers things that are silver and I like gold - or more accurately, brass. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Liz the Squeak Date: 27 Jun 03 - 03:55 PM Yes, purple features pretty heavily... and I'm sure she'll LOVE the cookies - in fact, I want one of those cookie cutters please!!! (seriously!!) This could stand to be the longest running bachelor/hen night in history as they aren't actually doing the deed until next year, but my motto has always been 'never put off until tomorrow what you can do today, because if you like it, you can do it again tomorrow!' I've got a nice easy drink of sloe gin here.... lots of ice, cut with a little soda to 'fluff' it up a little..... Now then, what about a song.... Maids when you're young? LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: MMario Date: 27 Jun 03 - 04:04 PM she threw her leg over me, hey ding durham down! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Morticia Date: 27 Jun 03 - 04:09 PM Oh boy......do I get to stay drunk til the wedding? Yes, purple is my favourite colour.....that and electric blue....pass me one each of those cookies *EG*....if we have blue jello in the pit, does anyone have a suggestion as to what we should do with the 45 gallons of lime that just arrived in a tanker? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: MMario Date: 27 Jun 03 - 04:10 PM Stir in some Tequila and drink it? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Micca Date: 27 Jun 03 - 04:37 PM MMario, bear in mind that Purple( as Morty means) is the colour of the foil on a wll-known brand of British Chocolate!!! Cadburys Dairy milk (ask her about her encounter with a 1lb bar of it ,in her pram when she was about a year old, (there are pictures) which led to her mother not speaking to me for a month) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: catspaw49 Date: 27 Jun 03 - 04:40 PM Hey There!! Hi alll.....looks like a great party going here and............What the fock is that? ........ Geeziz, I ain't eatin' no dick cookies.....Won't be happenin'......What else we got here? ..............Uh, the Hostess Snowballs with the peanut on top is a cute touch.......kinda' got that "boob feel" too....maybe later...............Who brought the friggin' clams? Doncha' think that's a bit much? Y'all are sick, ya' know that? Mario, get off your ass and get me a Jack and Coke huh?........I'll be over here iff any of you ladiws would like to sit on Ol' Spaw's lap...Spaw do a trick for you!....What the hell..Lemmee have a few of them clams............. Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 27 Jun 03 - 04:48 PM Kin I have one of them chocolate guacamole margaritas Jenn mentioned?? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Homeless Date: 27 Jun 03 - 04:55 PM well heck, if chocolate is her favorite color, these are the treats I'm supplying. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Stilly River Sage Date: 27 Jun 03 - 07:15 PM Are there any ducks, cats, geckos, etc., at this shindig? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 27 Jun 03 - 07:58 PM QUACK |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 27 Jun 03 - 10:31 PM "It walks, it talks, it crawls on its belly like a reptile!! It was found three miles from sea, three miles from land, and they don't know whatizzit!! The professors dunno whatizzit, the gummint don't know whatizzit! No-one knows whatizzit! Step right up and figure it out folks, whatizzit? Take yer hands out of your pockets, son, don't fiddle with the unemployed..." Better hand around those hatchet cookies, MM -- the other ones just cause trouble!! :>) A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: rangeroger Date: 27 Jun 03 - 10:57 PM Blue Jello? Far Out! I'm going for the bellyflop from the highdive again. Seems like years since I've done one. Here I go. AAAAAARRRRROOOOOOOOOOOO!!! SPLAT!! That one was for Angus. Can I have a pint of the Vile Black Stuuff and a shot of single malt? Now who the hell is getting married? rr |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: JenEllen Date: 28 Jun 03 - 10:37 AM Geez, maybe I should have said they were 'tommy-hawks' cookies? Sounds more butch? Hey, it worked for the CubScouts.... Liz, m'dear.....If you PM me your address, I'll send you the whole collection of them (serious, there are three or four different sizes) they should be put to good use! Chocolate guacamole margartias, Mike? Don't you mean a chocolate guacamole margarita flavoured daquiri? Noreen can make one of those, I'll bet. Spaw.....eeeeewwwwwww *bg* So what if it's a friggin' year early. It'll take that long to find somebody willing to crawl into the cake. After Joe's bachelor party, it's sure as hell not gonna be ME anymore! Who knew frosting burns could sting like that? SRS, maybe Sorcha will be along soon with the Glitter Go-Go Hamsters? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 28 Jun 03 - 10:39 AM I second the motion, guys!! Toasts and songs to you both! If thou must love me, let it be for nought Except for love's sake only. Do not say I love her for her smile--her look--her way Of speaking gently,--for a trick of thought That falls in well with mine, and certes brought A sense of ease on such a day-- For these things in themselves, Belovèd, may Be changed, or change for thee,--and love, so wrought, May be unwrought so. Neither love me for Thine own dear pity's wiping my cheek dry,-- A creature might forget to weep, who bore Thy comfort long, and lose thy love thereby! But love me for love's sake, that evermore Thou may'st love on, through love's eternity. A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Stilly River Sage Date: 28 Jun 03 - 11:45 AM I'm not in a rush to have wildlife inside the tavern--just wanted to know what to look out for as far as where to put food and set drinks, where to put ones self (sitting) and where to put ones feet if there's any dancing at this party! ("Ones" is already possessive--does it need an apostrophe?--"one's"). SRS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Allan C. Date: 28 Jun 03 - 12:02 PM Note to SRS: "Ones" is a plural as is used when speaking of counting by ones or by twos. Yes, an apostrophe is needed when using the possessive form. However, after a pint or three, who would care? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 28 Jun 03 - 12:15 PM After a few pints, one's ones become less distinct than one's twos, due to the clear hardness of the intiial consonant in the latter. A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: SINSULL Date: 28 Jun 03 - 12:35 PM Hardness in the latter? Back to the cookies are we? G' Afternoon, all. The kitties have finally agreed to come out from their hiding places to eat and use the litter boxes. Seamus is sunning himself out back and conversing with the neighbors' dogs, so I can take a Tavern Break. JD on the rocks with a twist and a male genital cookie if you please. Been practicing "Those wedding bells must not ring out" for days now. "A shriek of woe; a glittering blade; A lurch, a flash, a dart! And like the lightening stroke, the blade Had reached her trembling heart..." A real showstopper, that one. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Morticia Date: 28 Jun 03 - 02:22 PM erm......who's trembling heart exactly? Coulnd't we sing Roll Out the Barrel or something.....well, anything really, that doesn't involve me having to shriek,duck or fetch the police? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 28 Jun 03 - 02:42 PM Yeah -- this is not a show that needs stopping, IMHO! A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: SINSULL Date: 28 Jun 03 - 03:26 PM Oh all right. I will save it for the Getaway. I have an overwhelming craving for a medium rare charcoal broiled burger with cheese. Who is on grill duty today? I brought some cole slaw and chips to go with it. And if I can't sing, I will drink - another JD please. Pay no attention to the large yellow dog at my feet. Kendall took off for Old Songs and left Seamus in my care. He wouldn't mind a burger with cheese as well. Careful Morty, he's drooling on your train. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Morticia Date: 28 Jun 03 - 03:38 PM I'm kinda used to Seamus drool.....bless him.I tried to get the grill going but I'm not really very good at it and I have black fingerprints on the back of my frock now.....what will happen if I just chuck some lighter fuel on these darn coals??? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,amergin Date: 28 Jun 03 - 03:51 PM seamus kennedy drools? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 28 Jun 03 - 09:44 PM Depends on whether the coals are hot or cold. Hot coals could do a Dog impression (Woof!) Jen - could I order a large glass (preferably Imperial Pint) of something flavoursome. Preferably malty with a hint of Fuggles hops and a chocolate afterbite. It will be nice to chill out with such god company. I brought the sack of courgettes, all ready washed for the "Best wedding cake decoration " competition. You just need to provide your own Bowie knives to do the carving. I'll just be passing time making Custard towers until the crowd arrives. When the beer is pulled could you send it around to my table? Just put it on my bill... Quack!! Gtd. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Matt_R Date: 28 Jun 03 - 11:08 PM Should I bust out Dylan's "Wedding Song"? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: MAG Date: 29 Jun 03 - 02:11 AM Wow, you guys, congrats! I lived with visions for my company Instead of men and women, years ago, And found them gentle mates, nor thought to know A sweeter music than they played to me. But soon their trailing purple was not free Of this world's dust; their lutes did silent grow And I myself grew faint and blind below Their vanishing eyes. Then thou didst come, beloved, To be what they seemed. their songs, their splendors, shining fonts All met in thee and from out thee overcame my soul, with satisfaction of all wants Because God's gifts put man's best dreams to shame. don't check me on that; I'm pleasantly impressed with myself for remembering the lines. Did you guys meet through the 'Cat or did you already know each other in real life? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Allan C. Date: 29 Jun 03 - 07:28 AM Damn! Are you trying to tell me this isn't real life? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: MAG Date: 29 Jun 03 - 11:16 AM (BG) well, er, until you meet face to face, there is something missing; n'est ce pas? I wish I had someone to love me, Somene to call me his own; Someone to sleep with me nightly, I'm weary of sleeping alone. -- learned off a Sally Rogers tape. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Morticia Date: 29 Jun 03 - 11:20 AM we have met face to face and believe me, there is nothing missing....someone pass me a cookie *G* |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Allan C. Date: 29 Jun 03 - 12:23 PM Hm-m-m. I was just remembering that "Sally Rogers" was the name of the character portrayed by Rose Marie on "The Dick Van Dyke Show"... Morty and I have had some of the most wonderful adventures together anyone could ever imagine. We are planning for our marriage to be the best adventure of all. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: SINSULL Date: 29 Jun 03 - 01:20 PM What's a courgette? And what does it have to do with cake decorating? I believe Seamus Kennedy only drools when playing the banjo. Seamus the golden lab drools on cue. Terri will make such a lovely bride - dog drool on her train and charcoal on the back of her dress. How bought a glass of red wine for contrast, Morty? This is after all the virtual reality party. Something old - a few Mudcat curmudgeons Something new - Lily Ani Something borrowed - you still owe me .30 towards the tip at the diner Something blue - the sky on your wedding day. Another JD here. I am getting sloshed and misty. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 29 Jun 03 - 02:00 PM A courgette is a baby vegetable marrow (also zucchini) used successfully in past lives for competition carving. The green of the uncarved skin contrasts nicely with the creamy flesh. A gentle curlicue here, a bold slash there.... Works of Art! Can I get mist now? Quack! GtD. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 29 Jun 03 - 02:31 PM A single malt to inspire a double-union. Congratulations. Since I am now seeing double, congratulations to all four of you, or us, or whatever....and another single malt, make it a double. A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Morticia Date: 29 Jun 03 - 03:01 PM You know, I have a feeling that if we have a courgette/zucchini carving competition, we aren't likely to end up with little brides and bridegrooms but something far earthier.....I also have a feeling that a lot of people here aren't actually allowed sharp objects. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 29 Jun 03 - 07:06 PM I offer you some of my favorite pomes. Here's the first one, which is sort of 'Catter: Little Bo Peep has lost her sheep And doesn't know where to find them. But they'll all, face-to-face, Meet in parallel space Preceeding their leaders behind them. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: SINSULL Date: 30 Jun 03 - 06:46 AM Early AM. Taking a break from the festivities to watch "Desk Set" and get misty over another perfect match - Tracy & Hepburn. Seems appropriate while we get ready for antoher week of partying. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 30 Jun 03 - 08:33 AM I'd like another one of those special drinks, please. They taste absolutely awful and keep me from getting too sentimental so that I can share anopeer shoem...sheer anosher pome. And they're really big and potent, too. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: MMario Date: 30 Jun 03 - 08:42 AM Any of them Hostess And there's a tray of Framboise Mammalia in the fridge for anyone that wants some cold tasty desserty stuff. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 30 Jun 03 - 05:20 PM Heresh anodder uf my faavoright pomes: There were two old maids of Birmingham And this is the story concerning 'em No, thash not appropiate fur a weddin. If you'll gimme another think, I'll drink of one that is. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Liz the Squeak Date: 30 Jun 03 - 05:35 PM bugger appropriate - it's not as if we were all blushing virgins now.... is it? Pure as the driven slush mate, that's us! Oh AllanC - don't know if anyone has told you yet, but I'm your adoptive mother now.... I get to be the Mother of the Groom on my special badge. Just call me occasionally, you know? LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Tinker Date: 30 Jun 03 - 11:24 PM Hmmmm..... I've been carving and balling a large watermelon. There is a large bowl chilling in Stoli in the refrigerator.... Last time I carved a melon it was to show some kids from Paris what a Jack-o-lantern was ( in July ) But I guess I'll just go with a basket of fruit flowers.... Mario, I'll take one of those Framboise... Oh and who has the chocolete molds to go with the cookie cutters???I'm thinking I'll hve to harass my sister-in-law and get some chocoletes put together... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 01 Jul 03 - 07:37 PM Tinker....um...surely you can do better than a watermelon, no matter how large it looks? This might get out, you know... or is it that carving leaves you no spare time for social interactions? A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST Date: 02 Jul 03 - 08:03 AM I was thinking the same thing, Amos; besides which, everyone knows a woman can't have a long term meaningful physical relationship with a fruit. don't hit me! OUCH!I think we may have plugged WAY to many things into the electric circuits though...I beleive we browned out half the East Coast! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 02 Jul 03 - 08:40 AM Dishgushten...balling a watermelon.... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Noreen Date: 02 Jul 03 - 10:30 AM More chocolate guacamole margarita flavoured daquiris coming up!!
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 02 Jul 03 - 11:19 AM |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 02 Jul 03 - 11:24 AM Hey Folks - I like the new Paint Job. Where did you find the Decorators??? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Noreen Date: 02 Jul 03 - 11:26 AM Was all JenEllen's fault! Who's walked off with the hosepipe? Every kitchen should have one... I need a drink- and I shan't lick it off the walls! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Noreen Date: 02 Jul 03 - 11:27 AM Any of them thar critters good at licking up? Ah... I spy a little yellow Pontefract duck... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: JenEllen Date: 02 Jul 03 - 11:32 AM MY fault? HRH the Guacamole Queen takes no responsibility for Daquiri Princesses use --or misuse-- of ordinary kitchen appliances! (Or in the words of one of my favourite Ducks "Quaaaaaaaack"!) Mudcat Alert: The cookie cutters are wending their way across the pond. Once again, let me state that HRH the Guacamole Queen takes no responsibil......aw, hell.....QUAAAAAACK! HRHJE |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 02 Jul 03 - 11:55 AM I believe, actually, that the protestations from HRH might be related to a certain similarity of Appliance Abuse involving a puree of tomatoes... . God knows what you can do wrong with a cookie cutter, even one that looks like a tomahawk! A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 02 Jul 03 - 12:19 PM the edges of them cookie cutters can be pretty sharp! some of them are sharp enough to cut linoleum - especially when they are tied onto the bottoms of shoes during a game of tag. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 02 Jul 03 - 12:30 PM Sounds like the voice if hard experience, MM ... but I am really not sure I want to know!! :>( A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: JenEllen Date: 02 Jul 03 - 12:54 PM MMario, I was gonna ask if you got busted, but that's an entirely different set of cookie cutters....*bg* I excuse myself of any responsibility ahead of time because of the directions on the lid of the box which include, but are not limited to, jello jigglers and bent cookies for "Over The Hill" parties (I suppose for decoration you have to substitute coconut shavings for chocolate jimmies?) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 02 Jul 03 - 12:59 PM 'S awright, duck -- get someone with a strong right hand to straighten 'em for ya! (Ducks and runs, pursued by teflon-coated rolling pin). A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: artbrooks Date: 02 Jul 03 - 01:56 PM Didn't I get an e-mail recently telling me all about a guaranteed treatment for bent cookie cutters? Or was that for something else? Is there any beer, or only weird stuff? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 02 Jul 03 - 02:01 PM well - the cooler behind the bar has mostly 'merican stuff - probably counts as wierd, but the Guiness tanker is parked out back - just remember to shut the valve off after you've drawn your |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: artbrooks Date: 02 Jul 03 - 02:20 PM 'Merican stuff...Ballard Bitter? Works for me!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 02 Jul 03 - 03:04 PM Hi Jen! There's been some really nice touches since my last visit! That green alligator green and purple sunburst finish on the ceiling REALLY adds something - and as for those hatchet shaped cutouts in the lino! Well they are a touch of genius!!! I can see that we will be getting some imaginative courgettes once the truck arrives! Have you got any good romantic music on the jukebox these days? You know the sort Chuck Berry - My Dingaling; Tie my Kangaroo Down, Sport; On top of Old Smokey; Help!..... Pour me a large pint of Ginger Minge and I'll have a browse. Quack! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 02 Jul 03 - 05:13 PM Do'n use no stinkin' blender...I brought a cement mixer. It's outside, help yourself. ('Sokay, I got most of the cement out.) I will now recite my pavorite foem: I am Jesus' little lamb He has made me what I am He will wash me white as snow What a dirty job for little Jesus! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 02 Jul 03 - 09:55 PM Mario, is there any Polygamy Porter around? The stuff that says "When one is not enough" and "Bring some home for the wives?" Yeah, Mario, it's a real beer, and pretty good too. Ya got any? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: MAG Date: 03 Jul 03 - 02:35 AM Maybe we should all bring our local microbrews to the next gathering ... where ARE the happy couple hiding out? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Allan C. Date: 03 Jul 03 - 03:10 AM MAG, we are in our respective corners, waiting for the bell to ring. *G* |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 03 Jul 03 - 08:50 AM brings new meaning to the phrase 'going to the mat'if it's a real beer it should be in the Frigidaire |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 03 Jul 03 - 08:57 AM Guess no-one can hear me if I whisper... I said: If it's a real beer it should be in the Frigidaire marked "Real Beers " - probably on the top shelf. If it isn't there - reach through the sub-space tesserect cleverly disguised as a light fixture at the back of the second shelf and rummage around. The guy that sold it to me said it was connected to the warehouses of every REAL brewery in the world(s) through L-space. seems he knew this librarian into micro-brews.... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 03 Jul 03 - 09:06 AM Thanks. Tak. Gracias. Obrigado. Danke. Merci. Grazie. Etcetera. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 03 Jul 03 - 10:32 AM A subspace TESSERACT? Keeewwwwwllllll!!! A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 03 Jul 03 - 10:44 AM Hey, Amos, don't you know that you can git anything you want at the Mudcat Cafe?? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 03 Jul 03 - 11:21 AM HAYZUES, Amos! considering the queston was asked of someone who spends a large percent of his life time-traveling; in a virtual tavern; said tavern being mutable in location, decor and size - of COURSE we have sub-space tesserects! How the heck else would you want us to do it? Anything else could cause dangerous anomolies in the continuim |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 03 Jul 03 - 11:25 AM Anything else could? It may have escaped your attention, my dear colleague, that this entire virtual edifice is BUILT of dangerous anomalies in the continuua. All of them! Trans-continua anomalies of the most unsettling and harmful sort!! If Homeland Defense ever finds out what goes on in these Taverns, Ridge will join the Democratic Party from an overwhelm of anomalous discontinuities! A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST Date: 03 Jul 03 - 11:34 AM aw heck - we haven't had a dangerous anomoly in here since 'Spaw tried to go through "The Door" - well, unless you count the various explosions during the Christmas/New Years party... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Morticia Date: 03 Jul 03 - 12:14 PM actually, I think the anomalies went away when we persuaded Sinsull to stop feeding them..... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Noreen Date: 03 Jul 03 - 02:45 PM But who invited the Tesserects and the Anomalies? Are they on the bride's side or the groom's side? Look like trouble makers to me... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 03 Jul 03 - 02:52 PM Must everyone and everything take sides? Can't we all just get along together? This is a wedding celebration, not a sporting contest or a fight! Come, let's reason together and admit that we all can get along while recognizing the strength in our diversity. Yes, I think that...why is everyone going to sleep??? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,amergin Date: 03 Jul 03 - 02:54 PM i dunno raipaire...in some families weddings are a good time to brawl... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST Date: 03 Jul 03 - 02:58 PM My darkling drear I luck you, I need shoes to be nine, together foot and foot we'll troll until the bend of lime. To the apple let us chasten, to be harried by the beast -then I'll tast the asp of my favorite bass and enjoy the bed at least! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 03 Jul 03 - 03:22 PM Here's one on the Jukebox! Whisky is the one thing sure people's gonna make But when they get you on the Mudcat Tavern You done seen your mistake All night long and I couldn't get away All night long and I couldn't get away Break my neck and I couldn't get away Couldn't get away and I couldn't get away Oh go A-noma - 'noma Go on Amomaly Go on Anoma, my true love Have a little jubilee (With Apologies to Uncle Dave Macon) Quack! (Ducks and waddles) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 03 Jul 03 - 04:01 PM My love is an anomaly So far from every known pattern That only the brightest of minds and the deepest of hearts Could ever see where it lies; Thus, we have found each other Far from statistics. Rejoice, rejoice! We are strange together! What hope! A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 03 Jul 03 - 04:41 PM And here's Doris Day Tesselate -elate Whatever shall be Will be..... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 03 Jul 03 - 04:43 PM The Future's not ours to see? if you Tesselate! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Noreen Date: 03 Jul 03 - 07:46 PM Amos, that's lovely!! Are the Tesseracts related to the Tesselates? At least the Tesselates fit in well, Rapaire... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 03 Jul 03 - 08:31 PM I always thought that tesselates were those things that women dancers in tawdry, smoke-filled bars wore. You know, the things they can twirl around by muscular action.... As for fightin' and generally raising a ruckus, smashing furniture, and stuff like that -- feel free, but I don't want to get involved. One war is enough for anybody, and these days I want to limit my wars to the boud type. Y'all chose up sides, Anomalies vs. Tessarects, and I'll just sit here and watch. And drink. I'll let you know if/when the cops come. If they do, I'll try to catch them in a non-linear space/time/gravity paradox -- perhaps an ultra-Klein bottle -- and watch to see what happens if or when they approach the blue event horizon limit. Will they stretch to infinity? Will it be gory? Or will they silently and swiftly vanish away? Good name for a group, that, Blue Event Horizon. Sounds like an even better Festival name. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 03 Jul 03 - 08:37 PM Oh, yeah, I was gonna say, as they say in Kentucky, 'tain't much of a weddin' without one or two fights.... Rules: no guns, no broken bottles, no knives; no brass knuckles; no life preservers, no blackjacks, tire irons, lengths of pipe, or saps; no eye-gouging; no ears bitten completely off, and gentlemen and ladies will assist in cleaning up by courteously returned any teeth knocked out to the person they knocked them out of. If you're going to knee or kick a guy in the crotch, please be considerate of his SO. And have fun, fun, fun! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 03 Jul 03 - 09:25 PM Thanks, Noreen! A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Noreen Date: 03 Jul 03 - 09:28 PM In dance the matrons of honour, all tesselated... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 04 Jul 03 - 10:27 AM Oh, what the hell! No, it's not what you think!! You have a dirty mind!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 04 Jul 03 - 12:55 PM It's God's way of saying "F*** You" to George Bush, right? A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Allan C. Date: 04 Jul 03 - 02:00 PM What I want to know is how one of those cookies made it all the way out there! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 04 Jul 03 - 05:38 PM Maybe even God likes the cookies at Morti and Allan's wedding. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 05 Jul 03 - 11:14 AM Let's face it - God, Yaweh, Jehova, Zeuss, Odin, or whatever he calls himself these days, invented the shape in the first place. He's probably just showing off! Quack! ZZZZZZZSSSSSTTTTBANG!!!!!!!!!!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Liz the Squeak Date: 06 Jul 03 - 06:33 AM Well if that is so, it shows that God, Yaweh, Jehova, Zeuss, Odin, or whatever he calls himself these days is probably a girl.... a girl with a really WICKED sense of humour..... I mean, given the chance, would any bloke have wanted to give himself the 'last chicken in the shop', the 'sausage on a plate', the 'flibberty flobberties', the purple pudding' or the 'dead baby bird' look? LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 06 Jul 03 - 07:15 PM Door of fridge opens..... small head peeks out.. Quack! Well - there was a close miss. Good job I recalled the 4th dimension subspace anomaly in the icebox! Will someone pour me a pint please! GtD. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 08 Jul 03 - 03:36 PM HELLO THERE???? Where has everyone gone?????? Am I back in the Tavern???? Oh Bog! - I seem to have fallen through some subspace wormhole into something that looks like the Tavern, maybe in a universe where people never evolved, maybe just after closing time? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: MMario Date: 08 Jul 03 - 03:58 PM *crawls out from under the table* What is that gawdaweful quacking? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 08 Jul 03 - 04:01 PM *urp* Seems to be a slack time in the party - guess I'll go home for a bit and wait for the mail and my ultra-secret package that's suppossed to be arriving any time soon. But first - another Pint beertender! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 08 Jul 03 - 04:07 PM Yay for ultrasecret packages!! I think.... A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 08 Jul 03 - 05:03 PM Hot diggedy! With Mario receiving the Ultra Secret package the Allies are certain to win World War Two!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 08 Jul 03 - 05:05 PM I think I'll keep MY ultrasecret package tucked away for now , thanks! Quack! Now where did I put that pint down?... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Morticia Date: 08 Jul 03 - 07:19 PM I've been without ISP since Friday...a cruel and unusual punishment that defies the Geneva Convention and has left me bereft.....well, except for the quick 10 minute check in at work yesterday....I've really missed you all and may I please have a pint of Old and Nasty? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Noreen Date: 08 Jul 03 - 08:12 PM A woodworm creeps along the bar, carefully avoiding the eagle-eyed(?) yellow duck and asks: "Is the bar tender here?" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: MAG Date: 08 Jul 03 - 09:32 PM Yah, I'm up for some company, too ... I did our "Terrific Tuesday" program at work today since one of the invited guest mucicians was in the hospital -- emphysema and congestive heart failure .. QUIT, all you smokers! A tall cold gin and tonic, please ... oh, self service ... then I'll produce a bottle of Tanqueray oh hell, here's the lime juice; I'll just make it a gin gimlet, on the rocks ... then see if I can find my way to bed. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Roger the Skiffler Date: 09 Jul 03 - 03:46 AM So, you wait for me to go on holiday and have a party without me! Never mind, better late than never, you'll have to settle for some Lipsi honey and duty free Metaxas as my gift. Although I live in Ascot I don't wear top hat and tails, hope cords and an old T-shirt are OK, I'm a conscientious objector in the fashion wars. What's the next hymn: Amazing Grace to the tune of House of the Rising Sun? Just let me tune my washboard...(I'm acoustic today, left the twin-tub at home)and kazoo and...[enforced silence a result of having several cookies stuffed in mouth by music-lovers]. RtS (mumble mumble) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 09 Jul 03 - 05:52 AM Hey Worm... You want to watch out for duck eyed little hawks! I'm feeling generous today, cos it's my birthday! JJJEN - give the worm a bottle of Mexican Beer on me! Just take the cap off - he'll jump in by himself! Quaaacckkk! GtD. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 09 Jul 03 - 08:23 AM Is Little Hawk duck-eyed? That could explain a few things! Y'know the best thing about this place? Everything goes on Bert's Platinum Simmolion Card! So someone order up another tanker of Guiness... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 09 Jul 03 - 10:40 AM Hey - if that's right, I'll have a tanker of Guinness too, and one for the Worm! 'Hic!' |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST Date: 09 Jul 03 - 10:43 AM WHAT AMINUTE! I thought it was MRS. duck's b'day? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 09 Jul 03 - 11:01 AM Nope GUEST - definitely mine, but nothing to do with this thread! Have a Tanker of Guinness, I've nearly finished mine! Qaukc! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST Date: 09 Jul 03 - 11:26 AM aha-HICK! I see...Mary Garvey lead me astray... Is it true that you will be custard juggling at the wedding reception? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Morticia Date: 09 Jul 03 - 11:42 AM actually Geoff said he was going to be an Usher and go around saying 'ush at everyone..... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 09 Jul 03 - 01:31 PM Perhaps I need to do some practice! Let me see.... Big Bowl * Greeatt tin of Custard Powder * Gigantic Wooden Spoon * Dash of water (can we get some of that here Jen?) * ..... ..... ..... Right, Mix it - dash more - whoops, too much, a dash more water. -Stir it up... Getting there! Very close! Right that's about it. SQoosh - One Ball. Throw it up in the air - Allez OOPp... Right - SQoosh - Second Ball. Throw it up in the air - Allez OOPp... Catch first ball. Lob it somewhere... Where did that second one go? Aieeee, got it! Grab the third ball makings, oh bum, the first one's back again, sling number two quick, catch number one and throw nuber threee..... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 09 Jul 03 - 01:32 PM Whoops Jen... I'll see if I can find a mop and a cloth to clean down GUEST... Now where did I put that tanker of Guinness????? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 09 Jul 03 - 04:03 PM I think I'm having an identity crisis...due to content filter when I have my cookie I can't get to the forum - and when I don't I'm not *me*. and I can get to the ip address - but it won't recognize my cookie! oh woe.... I think I may head back to 1585. Life was so much simpler then...grovel a lot, do what the Queen says, and life is sweet... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 09 Jul 03 - 06:50 PM MMario - the identity crisis is due to the Guinness. You definitely need your contents filtering if you drink that stuff! Quack! GtD. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Noreen Date: 09 Jul 03 - 07:32 PM You're still *you*, MMario, I can see the sunburn peeling from here! (Sorry- mine's all peeled off from the previous weekend- very fetching, innit?) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 09 Jul 03 - 07:41 PM I know how to ush! "The bride's right and the groom gets left!" See? But what do you do when, like here, everyone is friends of both??? (Even more complicated in some areas, where those attending could be both friends AND relatives.) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: MMario Date: 09 Jul 03 - 09:21 PM peeling (what little there was) is long done... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Liz the Squeak Date: 09 Jul 03 - 09:47 PM Worse than that are the logistical problems of setting out the formal table settings remembering that Cousin Diane doesn't talk to her mother Eileen, who hates her niece Alison's boyfriend Gary, who won't sit with anyone except Alison and her brother Shaun, who won's sit anywhere because he'll be at the bar all night until the fight starts. Add the grooms' family to that and you're in for a happy night of fisticuffs! LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Kelly Date: 10 Jul 03 - 12:02 AM Are daughters of the groom invited to the party? ;) *Brandishes two bottles of Cuervo Gold* |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Allan C. Date: 10 Jul 03 - 02:01 AM Glad to see you here, Kelly! (For those who don't know, Kelly is one of my two daughters.) She will most definitely be at the actual wedding and other associated festivities. Sufficient bail money has been set aside for her, for Morticia, for JenEllen, for Liz, for catsPHiddle, for Noreen, for... Hold on a moment! I'm not totally sure there is enough money in the coffers to sponsor these women who are sure to be locked up (plus who knows how many more!) and there is certainly not enough to begin to post bond for the men! This may result in an entirely different meaning for BYOB!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Catherine Jayne Date: 10 Jul 03 - 03:00 AM Nice to meet you Kelly and welcome to the family!! Allan.....best get Micca saving up bail money too....especially if the list is going to increase somewhat!!!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Morticia Date: 10 Jul 03 - 03:05 AM Hi Kelly.....how lovely to see you here, and brandishing tequila yet......I can see we are going to get on *G*! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 10 Jul 03 - 04:06 AM HEY - anyone remember that bloke who came to fix the ice box in the fridge? You know - the one who fitted the tesseract beerfinder! I'm sure he said something about a transmutation gubbins as an optional extra. If you are going to need so much cash, it might be worth the investment to convert some lead to gold! Go for the ReverseBarleycorn model. [John Barleycorn, John Barleycorn makes a man into an ass. He turns your gold to silver, And your silver into brass] Or maybe you could find that Potter kid you barred for being underage a couple of years back. He may still have that Philosophers' Stone he was trying to flog for a pint of Riggwelter! Quack! GtD. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Noreen Date: 10 Jul 03 - 07:49 AM Hey, I like the idea of that tesseract beerfinder (ReverseBarleycorn model), Geoff. If I bring along an ass.....? And does Bert's Platinum Simmolion Card give Cashback? That would be useful for the bail moneys. Hi Kelly! (BTW the worm says thanks for the Mexican beer and the tanker of Guinness- and please can he try the Cuervo Gold now?) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 10 Jul 03 - 08:40 AM Bond and/or bail money? Police? Not problems at all. It's been arranged that everyone entering will be tagged with a Fourier-Poincare Multitemporal/dimensional Place-Flow Router. Smaller than a bit of dust, this device utilizes topological locii in such a way that Hesperis-Pith fuctions interact mobically with Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle, dimensional "flow" being restricted and "channeled" through multi-mentational gateways. Expressed in low and vulgar terms, you can not only think your way out of jail but do so with the drink of your choice in your hand. For more discussion of this, see your local topologist. Use the credit card and gold for booze and good times, dammit! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 10 Jul 03 - 09:05 AM wouldn't it be cheaper to just buy a third world country and hold the wedding there? Make you own laws - that way no bail! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 10 Jul 03 - 09:06 AM If you can't get 'em to agree whether or not "Guinness is good for you," how are you gonna get 'em to agree on LAWS, fergodsake? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 10 Jul 03 - 09:26 AM ushing when there are relatives and friends of both sides is simple. After the immediate family is seated you just alternate sides! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: JenEllen Date: 10 Jul 03 - 10:22 AM BYOB? I love it....Guess I'll have to plan on that as my carry-on... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 10 Jul 03 - 10:25 AM Okay, I think I get it...I sit on the right, for instance, and my wife is seated on the left. But what if I want to sit with her?? And what about a couple with kids? Or a polygamist/polyandrist? And what do we do about multiple personalities? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST Date: 10 Jul 03 - 10:25 AM Bring your own Bail? makes the whole trip planning thing a bit more expensive - but a wise move... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: JenEllen Date: 10 Jul 03 - 10:34 AM Wise move, sure. See, in this part of the country, you can always rely on your valiant and trustworthy horse to just come to the jail window when you whistle. You tie your lasso, one end around the bars and the other around the saddle horn, give him a swat on the ass and "wah-lah"---no more jail. But I doubt they'll let me take a horse on the plane.... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 10 Jul 03 - 10:48 AM Those topologist sure seem to have a bunch of funny shapes. Must be an occupational hazard, eh? A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Allan C. Date: 10 Jul 03 - 12:22 PM We'll also have a "special" place to where the pedantics can be 'ushed. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST Date: 10 Jul 03 - 01:16 PM pedantics should always be 'ushed (In my opinon) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: pixieofdoom Date: 10 Jul 03 - 02:52 PM If we start a collection now, we might have enough bail money by May. If not, I vote that the happy couple plus immediate family get first dibs! Or we just hold the wedding in a jail? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: JenEllen Date: 10 Jul 03 - 04:51 PM Okay, then what'll it take to get me adopted? *bg* I have my own piranhas..... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Allan C. Date: 10 Jul 03 - 04:54 PM I doubt anyone in the jailhouse will care what you are wearing, JenEllen! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: JenEllen Date: 10 Jul 03 - 05:05 PM Oh, the piranha-toothed wit! LOL So long as you're not planning on that traditional "frosted cupcake" look that most weddings have.....Then again, if we FROST our cupcakes, we might be able to arrange for early release! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Catherine Jayne Date: 10 Jul 03 - 05:14 PM Thats a grand idea Pixie but that means I would have to marry your lovely great uncle before the happy couples big day!!!!....I'll start saving now!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Liz the Squeak Date: 10 Jul 03 - 05:21 PM OI!! I resent that remark - I've never been locked up in my life (apart from that time I got trapped in the can here, but that was purely an oversight on Spaw's part - he forgot where he put the key to the leg irons....), and I don't intend getting a night in jail for anyone here (except maybe Skipjack, but we'll gloss over that...)... besides, what would happen to Bratling? As Godmother, Morty (OK, stop laughing!) could have custody of her..... What do you mean, you want to rethink the whole 'Godmother' thing? LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 10 Jul 03 - 06:10 PM I dunno, Liz -- look at it as a New Experience -- a "try anything once" kinda thing -- except for the private piranha bit....which probably belongs over on the Thingie thread! :>) A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Micca Date: 10 Jul 03 - 07:08 PM " They're in the jailhouse now, they're in the jailhouse now I told them over again to quit drinkin' whisky, lay off of that gin They're in the jailhouse now" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Tinker Date: 10 Jul 03 - 07:58 PM Goin' to the jailhouse and they're gonna get mar-air-arried.... I better start puttin extra funds aside now. I've convinced the hubby I have to jump the pond and make the festivities, but I don't think dragging the kids over to post bond is gonna go over real big, not to mention the cost of it all... Perhaps I'd better make sure my better half doesn't find this particular thread... Let me just open another bottle of Cock of the North... Anyone else want a wee dram?? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 10 Jul 03 - 08:24 PM Well, I knew a gal named Morty She was short, but she was sporty, She hooked up with the best guy in the land! Well, the vile stuff started flowin' And Morty started showin' And the celebratin' just got out of hand! They're in the jailhouse now They're in the jailhouse now, Because they told the oldest magistrate That law and order would have to wait, Oh, they're in the jailhouse now! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Morticia Date: 10 Jul 03 - 08:37 PM Bravo, my Amos......any chance of you showing up to this gig? Tink, I'll have one of those North of the Cocks and to hell with the bail money....we can always sell the virtue of the assembled congregation......that should raise enough to buy a pint to bribe the on-call copper with.....otherwise it's a file in a banjo time.... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 10 Jul 03 - 08:42 PM Ach, Morty, I'd give my eye teeth if I still had 'em -- wore 'em out from too many insertions of boot. But I will be there in spirit me duck! And that's no little thing! :>) Love, A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Catherine Jayne Date: 11 Jul 03 - 03:36 AM Which is the nearest jail then....Doncaster (known as Doncatraz..probably not reccomended!), York, Hull, The Wolds??? Do we know how much bail is set at these days......Micca says he will need to get a second mortgage or a rather large loan!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 11 Jul 03 - 04:15 AM Mortie - I once tried the Hacksaw hidden in a banjo trick.... The bastard just sawed the neck off the banjo! Quack! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rapparee Date: 11 Jul 03 - 08:50 AM Azkaban, maybe? Chateau d'If? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 11 Jul 03 - 11:15 AM PIRATES! Pirates off the port bow! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 11 Jul 03 - 01:46 PM Quick - ask them if they know that Henry Morgan bloke - maybe we can get a discount on a barrel of Rum? Quack! GtD. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST Date: 11 Jul 03 - 01:52 PM Doesn't he put all those funny spices in it though? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 11 Jul 03 - 02:11 PM MMario: Steady on there, Mister Lookout! This hyar be a Tavern on land -- it has no port, nor any bow. But here's a shot of rum, and you can take a bow. As fer those Pirates I think they're a baseball team dropped by to congratulate the Groom on his Home Run. A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Micca Date: 11 Jul 03 - 02:15 PM THERES NO PORT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Bloody hell, has anyone told Morty!!! she WILL be Miffed!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 11 Jul 03 - 03:01 PM But I was just in the Tavern with Kat O'Nine and Smitty and there were Pirates! Honest. And I didn't even drink out of that flask of Micca's! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 11 Jul 03 - 03:05 PM Oh---THAT tavern!! Is it onthe Port Bow, then? Or is that a local gesturew for asking for a drink? "Please, barkeep, another glass of your excellent Jerez!" "Nay, an' you not offer a Port Bow you'll see naow drink from me!! This be a mannered place, now!" A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 11 Jul 03 - 04:17 PM I better cut back on the drinks - I keep getting the oddest flashes...Are you SURE this tavern isn't on the ocean? I could swear we're rocking... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 11 Jul 03 - 05:35 PM When the sea's in your blood, it is likely to show up anywhere, lad! :>) A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Catherine Jayne Date: 11 Jul 03 - 05:39 PM No sea in my blood but I am getting a tad worried about the port shortage......will there be enough for my nightly infusion??!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: katlaughing Date: 11 Jul 03 - 05:51 PM So sorry, I got all mixed up with the boyos in the Giant Squid thread, Loooooooong John SLiver's Haunt needed a drink and next thing I knew we'd shipped out to sea with me wenching as Kat O'Nine. Didn't mean to step on any toes, esp. when I'm not even dancing! Anyhow, I was waiting 'til the Blessed Event to come in this Tavern, BUT it seems that'd be a long dry spell if I do, so...a long, tall kewl one of sumptin' wet, please, barkeep, to drink, to drink(!) and if any of you'se who're shy of the marital knot are feeling a little green around the gills, step on over to the plank and come aboard the Ship's Tavern. Plenty of good wishes for the besotted couple there, too! luvyakat |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,Loooooooooooooooong John Sliver Date: 11 Jul 03 - 05:54 PM Ah, lasses, ye'll be needing some port in a storm, alright! But it's better by half ta have a storm in port, where ye can have the port in the storm. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 12 Jul 03 - 06:17 PM LOOOOOOOONG John - watch out for these lasses! You haven't seen their Port Holes ;¬) Quack! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 12 Jul 03 - 06:41 PM Now, Geoff, don't be giving Long John none of their lip, y'hear??? We be talking about decent upstanding wenches, none o'yer round-heeled cabin doxies here!! A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: artbrooks Date: 12 Jul 03 - 06:56 PM Well, hell...here I take a week off to do meaningful things and this place has gone way downhill...about time! Has anybody given thought to a Mudcat/Mudchat wedding simulcast? We could all get on line at once and throw virtual rice... Anyway, I saw that big tanker of sticky brown stuff parked outside...but is there any real beer? Cats! Did you drink all the port? {{reaches into tesseract in back pocket and pulls out a gallon bottle of Sandiman's}} Care for some of mine? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Liz the Squeak Date: 12 Jul 03 - 07:21 PM Amos, you don't know us very well do you......?! LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 12 Jul 03 - 07:59 PM Dear Liz: Well, I am not saying I do and Iam not saying I don't, but if I did -- which I am not saying, mind you -- I would be too much of a gentleman to discuss what I know -- or would know, that is, if I did, which I probably don't....and that Sandeman's looketh most inviting just now.... A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Morticia Date: 12 Jul 03 - 08:05 PM ( in a small and rather weak voice) Did I mention I get sea sick on the merest whiff of a sailors jacket? Could someone please pass me a bucket.....and something fortifying.....perhaps a small port...like Grimsby? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 12 Jul 03 - 11:53 PM Ah, there there, Morty -- tradition is on your side -- all sailors know it's any port in a storm. A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Liz the Squeak Date: 13 Jul 03 - 03:38 AM Amos ~ Did you actually say something in that statement, or did you not? And as for upstanding? That costs extra. LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Catherine Jayne Date: 13 Jul 03 - 08:45 AM moi???? drink all the port....I'd like a large one.....how about southampton or felixstowe?? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 13 Jul 03 - 09:49 AM LOL, Liz!! Wot I said was wot I meant, I think... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: artbrooks Date: 13 Jul 03 - 02:01 PM \ / \__/ Big port for Cats. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Catherine Jayne Date: 13 Jul 03 - 04:10 PM Cheers Art!!!............best pour a couple more...one for Morty and one for Pixie! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Liz the Squeak Date: 13 Jul 03 - 06:51 PM Oh, I see, ignoring me now are you? Where's mine? Vintage please - a nice Grahams 1980 would be good. Well anything as long as it's over 16! LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Catherine Jayne Date: 13 Jul 03 - 07:06 PM 1980...must have been a good year...the year I was born!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Liz the Squeak Date: 14 Jul 03 - 04:46 AM For port it was OK, but it was a crappy year for corks. LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 14 Jul 03 - 11:08 AM put another nickel in the nickelodean! I hear there are some neww platters in the old juke box...wonder what the titles are? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: MAG Date: 15 Jul 03 - 01:48 AM Well, we could be cynics and play Teresa Morgan's Wedding Song, but that's only for first time arounders -- for the starter marriage types. Er, this isn't the first for youse guys, is it?? Ducking and diving, MA (In a previous life I worked in a little library across from St. Michael's in Chicago -- yes, the one that's now a TV set -- and one very cynical guy on staff actually went out into the middle of the street when there was a wedding and yelled, "Fool!" at the departing car ...) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Liz the Squeak Date: 15 Jul 03 - 12:06 PM Anyone done 'don't get married girls, for marriage is a curse'? I wish I could remember the tune... and the words.... and I wish I'd remembered it about 13 years ago...... LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amergin Date: 15 Jul 03 - 01:28 PM welll you could always do this one.... You Were Always On My Nerves....lol |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Allan C. Date: 15 Jul 03 - 02:05 PM MAG, to answer your question: No, not the first; but definitely the last. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Noreen Date: 15 Jul 03 - 02:23 PM DON'T GET MARRIED GIRLS (Leon Rosselson) in the DT Liz- MIDI there too. Brilliant song, but I'll refrain in the circumstances! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Liz the Squeak Date: 15 Jul 03 - 05:37 PM AllanC - refrain means don't do it!!! Hoist by your own petard there mate! LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 15 Jul 03 - 07:20 PM Always wondered about a petard - is it short for pet aardvark? Quack! GtD. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Amos Date: 15 Jul 03 - 07:27 PM Actually, Geoff, it is a primitive cannon for blowing open city gates. With a penchant for misfiring and blowing the gunny sky high. A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MAG at work Date: 15 Jul 03 - 09:00 PM Ah! I have just found "Every Little Thing She Does is Magic" by Sting on the jukebox. Let 'er rip! Oh, and here' Raitt's version of "Let's give 'em something to talk about..." what else is good on here?? hmmm |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: MMario Date: 17 Jul 03 - 10:40 AM c'mon - this place needs to pick up a bit! According to the announcement - we only have 10 months, 4 days and about 23 hours before the big event. That's barely enough time to wish 'Spaw a Happy birthday, let alone celebrate these Nuptuals! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Liz the Squeak Date: 17 Jul 03 - 05:42 PM Best be putting the sprouts on to boil then..... LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: MAG Date: 17 Jul 03 - 09:08 PM Oh, and here's Aretha's "Doctor Feelgood" -- are you Brits familiar with our first lady of soul music?? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Rustic Rebel Date: 17 Jul 03 - 10:57 PM What's all those bells ringing? Hey Looooooooooong John, your not a midget by any chance are you? Kelly, where are you with that tequila? You are my kind of person, woman. I just happen to have a few plums here with me, care to share a shot or three? This looks like a fine party in here but what's MMario doing under the table over there? Rustic |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 18 Jul 03 - 08:38 AM just inspecting the fit between the floorboards. *hic* Don't want dust mice to get their tails caught! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 18 Jul 03 - 04:26 PM *gets up, removes 1,762 dust mice from clothing* Well - I must take my leave - Her Majesty Elizabeth is arriving shortly in Warwick, and I must be present... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST Date: 24 Jul 03 - 01:28 AM Someone died on the way to the alter. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 24 Jul 03 - 07:57 AM died? heck no! But even this crowd needs to take a breather once in a while...or a short rest and vacation in the NYCFTTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Allan C. Date: 24 Jul 03 - 08:13 AM There are other things happening around here, you know. Besides, I'm usually too busy packing to post to this or to any other thread very often. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Morticia Date: 24 Jul 03 - 12:01 PM The altar bit is next year....this is just the pre-party, to the pre-party.You have to have stamina to get wed around these parts. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: GUEST,MMario Date: 24 Jul 03 - 12:16 PM a cast iron stomach and esophagus probably doesn't hurt either! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Geoff the Duck Date: 24 Jul 03 - 05:49 PM And a pretty long memory - to recall why you arrived in the first place! Quack! GtD. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Liz the Squeak Date: 25 Jul 03 - 04:37 PM why am I here? LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Goin2the Chapel TAVERN From: Morticia Date: 25 Jul 03 - 06:30 PM Everyone's got to be somewhere? Thank you Spike Milligan and goodnight. |
