|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Rapparee Date: 13 Feb 04 - 11:20 AM When you look at anatomical drawings and even dissected bodies, notice how convoluted the innards are ("guts" in medical language), all twisting and turning like the worm of a still. And the body produces heat. So, why is it hat we can't drink wine and pee brandy? |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Amos Date: 13 Feb 04 - 11:28 AM Wot -- an' waste perfickly good brandy? Give the Lord SOME credit for brains, after all!! A |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Rapparee Date: 13 Feb 04 - 11:36 AM Who said we were going to waste it??? |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Dead Horse Date: 13 Feb 04 - 05:40 PM I do believe it has something to do with the other internal processes, which are, on the whole, remarkably like the brewing processes for lager........... Need I say more? |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Liz the Squeak Date: 13 Feb 04 - 06:25 PM That's why the Aussies call it XXXX - they aren't allowed to write PISS on the tin. LTS |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Dr Will C U Now Date: 14 Feb 04 - 08:17 AM That reminds me. Will all patients please remember to flush the loos TWICE, as it has to be pumped all the way to the kitchens. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Morticia Date: 14 Feb 04 - 08:46 AM yeuuuch......who do I have to sleep with to get out of here? |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: GUEST,Nurse Ratched Date: 14 Feb 04 - 11:24 AM I will be coming round the ward once a week. I will bring my prod, my stick and my handcuffs for those difficult patients. anyone found with a red breast or peeing brandy will be sent to my room for special attention. Nurse Ratched |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: John MacKenzie Date: 14 Feb 04 - 04:21 PM I don't want to sleep with the female patients. I want to stay awake with them, it's much more fun!! John |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Liz the Squeak Date: 14 Feb 04 - 08:38 PM Nurse, the screens, he's doing it again!!! LTS |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: lady penelope Date: 14 Feb 04 - 09:50 PM There'll be a charge for it, you know........... TTFN Lady P. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: GUEST,Nurse Ratched Date: 15 Feb 04 - 12:05 AM I went in to get him but he doesn't have a photo or profile. so I looked for someone wearing a name tag Giok - with no success. I have polished the hypodermic and have plenty of bandages ready - hang on - I'm off to ward 13 - think I just saw him! |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: John MacKenzie Date: 15 Feb 04 - 05:50 AM The profile has been exorcised to protect the innocent denizens of Mudcat. Mummy Mummy, why can't I see my face in the mirror? John |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: freda underhill Date: 15 Feb 04 - 06:19 AM there's a few Dorian Grays in here... but John G Mac.. looking in the mirror and seeing nothing.. do you have transylvanian forebears? what is your secret? and are they giving you Johnny Walker intravenously? fred |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Morticia Date: 15 Feb 04 - 06:37 AM Why is Giok allowed four bears? I was only allowed one and even then Liz made fun of it cos it only has one eye and that's crossed... |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: freda underhill Date: 15 Feb 04 - 07:37 AM Once upon a time, there were three bears.. Hair bear, Can't bear, and Fore bear. Hair bear was so hairy that people found him scary. Can't bear was so intolerant that he became a radio jock ..and fore bear decided to become a professional golfer.. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: John MacKenzie Date: 15 Feb 04 - 11:15 AM Sorry, nix on the Johnny Walker. it's not real whisky. Now a nice drop of Highland Park, that's another matter. Nurse, where's the cannula? John |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Liz the Squeak Date: 15 Feb 04 - 07:00 PM Argh... still suffering from plague and now... HALF TERM!! I've got a touch of the limpits coming on, I can tell.... LTS |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: John MacKenzie Date: 16 Feb 04 - 03:59 AM Sorry Liz, no sympathy on the impending Limpit invasion, it is after all a self inflicted woe. John. [Coat time again methinks!] |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: MudGuard Date: 16 Feb 04 - 04:18 AM Self inflicted? Manitas inflicted ;-) |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Ella who is Sooze Date: 16 Feb 04 - 04:38 AM Well, I hope all our convalesants (SP) are doing well and are not too bored! Take is easy, mind the limpits and I hope Cat is not going too crazy in hosp! Be good whilst your under the doctor ;-) Regards Ella |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Dr Will C U Now Date: 16 Feb 04 - 03:41 PM Right you lot. The treatment room is free, so who's first for the lager enema? I have a crate of Fosters just waiting for some asshole to enjoy. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: John MacKenzie Date: 16 Feb 04 - 05:04 PM Andy, I believe that Liz was involved too! John |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: MudGuard Date: 16 Feb 04 - 05:09 PM John, are you sure? ;-) |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: GUEST,Nurse Ratched Date: 16 Feb 04 - 05:21 PM where is that man? i have my little black bag, my restraints... and i hear a strange laughing from across the hall.. this time I'm going to get him and modify his behaviour.... by the time I've finished he'll be barking for mercy.. Nurse Ratched |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Liz the Squeak Date: 17 Feb 04 - 04:56 AM MudGuard - I distinctly remember being there at the time.... and I've got the scar to prove it! Next time you're over.....? LTS |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Dead Horse Date: 17 Feb 04 - 09:48 AM Let's have a competition to see who has the longest, most gruesome. (a la *Jaws*) Scar! You bunch of preeverts. Scar! |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: MAG Date: 17 Feb 04 - 11:07 AM serious? I've got one from abdominal surgery at age 2. It grew with me. not that gruesome, but pretty wide at this point. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Rapparee Date: 17 Feb 04 - 11:20 AM I've got three: one is on my right leg, where a fellow Boy Scout tried to cut it off with a corn knife (a sort of bolo or short, heavy machete) quite a few years ago, one in the middle of my tummy from when I was born, and one over my right eyebrow from when my mummy dropped me on my head when I was little. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Catherine Jayne Date: 17 Feb 04 - 11:22 AM I have 3 little one on my knee which will soon be accompanied by about a 12inch scar from the surgery I am having in 3 weeks. I have a 6and a half inch scar on my arm from a previous surgery..... |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: MudGuard Date: 17 Feb 04 - 11:54 AM cats, are there still any original parts in you? ;-) |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Chief Chaos Date: 17 Feb 04 - 12:51 PM I should have visited the ward when I had a chance! The HMO short changed the doc on my sinus medication so they switched to a generic which spiked my blood pressure by about 45 pts. along about the same time I had a severe sinus infection (Lord knows I'd have rather been dead). So anyhoo, the doc puts me on a second med which immediately causes constipation and other side effects (let's just say the misses wasn't happy with my performance and leave it at that). By about the fifth day the body says sod this! and things progress the way they normally ought. Needless to say I'd have rather been elsewhere when the breakthrough occurred! (I Know, I know, I know....too much information!) So I'll just toast your continuing recovery and check in once in a while to see how Ya'll are doing. By the by...anybody know where I can get some Mental Floss? |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Liz the Squeak Date: 17 Feb 04 - 07:00 PM You need more than mental floss Chief..... try a full bottleinfrontofme. It's a day in therapy tomorrow - Limpit and I are building Castle Aaargh in Lego. I'm sure there's a law against cruelty to parents.... LTS |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Stilly River Sage Date: 18 Feb 04 - 12:51 AM I'm back, after a week away. I haven't read the posts, just gone straight to the end. Just hook me up to the Chardonay, I'll rest a little, read up, and send some witty ripost to the ongoing conversation. It's good to be back! SRS |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: MudGuard Date: 18 Feb 04 - 03:18 AM Limpit is cruel to you? Is she trying to steal YOUR Legos? ;-) How is your limp, btw? |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Catherine Jayne Date: 18 Feb 04 - 03:51 AM Limpit can't get anywhere near the Lego....have you seen Liz when she is in full building mode??!!! Nurse...I need more Gin in my IV!! |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: John MacKenzie Date: 18 Feb 04 - 03:59 AM Lots of people like to be left alone when they're erecting something! John |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: The Fooles Troupe Date: 18 Feb 04 - 04:15 AM rapaire re scars "one over my right eyebrow from when my mummy dropped me on my head when I was little." Hmmmmmm....... |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Dave Bryant Date: 18 Feb 04 - 05:24 AM I have a 10" vertical scar down my tummy more or less centred on my navel - I'm glad it didn't go any further south ! This was the result of having a long chunk of colon removed (because of diverticulitis) about 10 years ago. They also removed my appendix because they had to move all my internal plumbing around so much that the place which it would have ended up would have meant that no doctor would have made a correct diagnosis of appendicitis. One of my friends told me "You shouldn't have much of a scar - it's all keyhole surgery nowdays". It's just a pity that the keyhole would fit that ceremonial key they use to to give people "The Freedom of the City of London". |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: MAG Date: 18 Feb 04 - 11:39 AM Well, I gotta have a chest x-ray today because I'm still sick (three weeks now). I wouldn't have even bothered calling the doc except I worry about my voice. Can I have Hennessey in my virtual IV? |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Chief Chaos Date: 18 Feb 04 - 01:56 PM Hello, hello, hello Doctor Chaos is making his rounds in his motorized pillcart with the goose horn and noddy dog on the back. In his Doctors smock over scrubs, huge cigar, bushy eyebrows, bushy mustache and circle glasses bent over and chasing the nurse out of the ward. I've got to make rounds to pay for my malpractice suit. A lady came to see me and said "Doctor I seem to have gained a little weight". I sent her home with some horse pills. She came back and said they gave her the trots. Another woman came to see me and said "Doctor I seem to be gaining a lot of weight." I sent her home with some diet pills. She came back a month later and said that she'd gone to a bank to open a new account and came back with twin baby boys, doctor what do you think of that? I said what a great bank, I usually only get a toaster. At the trial the judge looked at me and said "do you know anything about medicine?" I said no, but if you hum a few bars I'll fake it. He looked back and said "What must your parents think about you?" I said Judge I'm just a Doctor if you want to know what they're thinking you should ask a psychiatrist. If this trial goes on any longer I'm just going to have to take the fifth, and speaking of fifths, don't mind if I do! If you need me I'll be in the babery checking on the nurses, I mean in the nursery checking on the babies of course. Just squeeze the duck and I'll know its for me! |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: kendall Date: 18 Feb 04 - 02:12 PM Well, Jeez, considering all these ailments, I probably wont qualify for a bed. All I have is a rebuilt heart. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Stilly River Sage Date: 18 Feb 04 - 03:56 PM I will pass on enumerating my various and sundry scars. Being a pasty-white Scandinavian none of them shows up now anyway. Liz, if any of those Legos are left on the hard cold floor in the dark this ward is going to light up with the curses of any poor Mudcatter who steps on them! Kendall, it took you long enough to wander over here. I agree, you're probably too healthy to join this group of malingerers. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: MAG Date: 18 Feb 04 - 05:54 PM I guess I'm one a' them mal things too; my doc said I had a persistent virus and sent me home with this little inhaler that makes me cough stuff up. I don't want to cough on anybody, though I'm probably way past contagious, so I'll trot on -- er, stroll on -- to another thread. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Liz the Squeak Date: 18 Feb 04 - 07:10 PM Well I got some new glasses today. Instant result, my headache has gone! Stupid thing is, the prescription is weaker than my previous one, so I guess I was just getting lazy. Hook up the champers in the ol' IV there, I feel an infarction coming on! LTS |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Walking Eagle Date: 19 Feb 04 - 12:32 AM Does chemo nausea count? The worst thing is, the stuff they give me to keep me from getting sick MAKES ME SICK! Gives me one huge headache! Nuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrsssssssssssssseeeeeeeeee! I'll take some cranberry juice in my IV and some Chevas Regal. OOHHH and a back rub while you are at it! |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: Dave Bryant Date: 19 Feb 04 - 07:18 AM There's a great song that Sic Transit sing about a guy who's got every ailment - except that "Hypochondr-i-ay I sure ain't got". It's written by Clive Lever so I'll see if I can get him or Don Thomson (Wyziwyg - with a z) to post the lyrics. |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: GUEST,Hypomaniac Date: 19 Feb 04 - 07:32 AM i'm lying on these sweaty sheets my lymph glands are a drainin the morphine drip is in my mind and angels are a rainin my torso has been sliced in two and stitched back up a little i want to sleep but here comes nurse with instruments down her middle her bony finger prods my arm she straps a cord around and when i wheeze a little gasp she says shut up don't moan Nurse Ratched through this bleary daze i while away my weary days and long to be upright and tall and never feel your evil maul but then i squeeze that morphine drip my god i think she's had a sip...... aaaagh.... |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: GUEST,bleary and weary... Date: 19 Feb 04 - 08:05 AM who is this damned nurse ratched i thought? a figment of Ken Kesey's imagination? I see her coming towards me.. is she real or is this the morphine? An authoritative voice spoke in my head. It said that the screenwriter Bo Goldman who created her for 1 Flew Over Cuckoo's Hernia said his first encounter with nursing was with a labor and delivery nurse who attended his newborn brother. "She was terrifying. She was huge and scary. ... She was obsessive about sanitation. The baby was always clean. The blanket was always clean and everything had to be clean." Some images are hard to shake. Nurse Ratched in "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest," said the voice, has become almost synonymous with the disciplinarian medical professional—a nurse whose unyielding worldview and sadism, when unchecked, could provoke a homicidal meltdown in her emotionally regressed patients. To bring the character from Ken Kesey's novel to the screen, Goldman based Nurse Ratched in part on his imperious mother-in-law. "I always thought of [Nurse Ratched] as a nurse second and a control freak first," Goldman said. "She was a terrifying woman, an emasculating and castrating creature." "I think that every lawyer is a criminal and in any doctor there is a sadist," he said. "In every nurse—never mind Florence Nightingale or Mother Teresa—is a sadist's accomplice." ...this bed is uncomfortable - my limbs are aching.... where is my teddy bear? dreary and teary.... |
|
Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward From: GUEST,Nurse Ratched Date: 19 Feb 04 - 08:26 AM I am looking for Giok, with my cranial saw in hand. I find in this hospital some ignorant patients who do not understand that I am good for them. there is no use resisting, you must comply. I provide the following reference from Professor Hernia Hesse, of Harvard: "History will show that women who procured stature and power in society have always struggled to keep their position, and those who tried to topple these women from their lofty perch were, more than likely, always men. It is the same in Ken Kesey's novel, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, in which the character, Nurse Ratched, struggles to keep her self-constructed domain together after an opposing enemy, named McMurphy, fights to pull power from her by causing a revolt. In the end, Nurse Ratched wins the battle between her and McMurphy by having him lobotomized, but does she really win the age-old battle of male versus female by suppressing him? Another question is: Why do readers see Nurse Ratched as an evil and conniving woman for trying to save her own self-constructed domain? Feminist critics point out that Kesey's portrayal of Nurse Ratched is degrading because they truly believe she represents the negative personification of the female struggle for power. However, there is a need to look at Nurse Ratched from a different point of view and reveal the positive qualities that Kesey is trying to portray in women through Nurse Ratched. If we analyze the sexist language used to describe Nurse Ratched from a positive female perspective, we would notice that the control and power she uses is to maintain order in a chaotic environment that the men have created in her self-constructed domain. Though the men on the ward see her as a dominating dictator, as readers, we need to take a leap of faith in order to understand that her dominating attitude is a calculated move to maintain order, which in turn, can be considered a positive character trait. Nurse Ratched is battling the males in order to gain respect, keep her control over the ward, and to show readers that a woman must defend and fight in order to succeed, which in turn, should be viewed as a positive character trait and not a negative one. " Professor Hesse is mistaken in only one point.. he seems to think I am a character of fiction, not a real person, aah, but then he was my patient in 1972... now he thinks ecerything is a work of fiction.... ha ha ha ha HA HA HAAAAA......................... N.R. |
