BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!

Subject: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 May 08 - 11:08 PM

For the many Mudcat men who may be feeling a bit left out at this point. A bit unappreciated. A bit bereft.

Yes...this is the thread where you can let it all hang out and tell your tales of male bonding round the campfire, beating drums together in the deep woods, exchanging stories of past affronts and challenges to your dignity and your manhood, plumbing the depths of your emotional hurts in a safe and supportive group that won't laugh at you, then running naked through the trees together, peeing outside against trees and boulders, howling at the moon, and getting in touch with your inner cavechild together! Yessiree.

Go to it.

I trust that the moderators will make sure that no womenz stray into this all-male thread.... ;-D

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: GUEST,Jack the Sailor
Date: 07 May 08 - 11:20 PM

Glug!
Glug!
Glug!
Glug!


Burrrruuuppppp!!

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Wincing Devil
Date: 07 May 08 - 11:22 PM

Who bringing the S'mores®?

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Amos
Date: 07 May 08 - 11:23 PM

You men need to answer up to your commitments and face your true Selfs is whut I think.

A

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: frogprince
Date: 07 May 08 - 11:38 PM

Damn right, L.H.; who wants to get naked in a group that includes womenz???

All through high school, college, and Navy years, I experienced male herd showers without giving it any real thought. Then (too long a story to get into) I found myself in nudist settings. A few years further on, I wound up working in a foundry for a year or so. Driving home without taking a male herd shower was out of the question. Quite a few of the bunch acted like total baboons in the showers. Surrounded by this, and nearly blind without my glasses, I was taken off guard by how uncomfortable I felt. To top it off, I don't know how anyone could go through the process without occasionally losing his grip on a bar of soap. If I did, I would squat, not bend over, and retrieve the soap as quickly as I could. I was soon informed that I was suspected of being "queer" for my shower room behaviour. At least no one threatened me physically over it; but how do ya win in some situations?

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Big Mick
Date: 07 May 08 - 11:47 PM

We must have campfire songs...... I am going to suggest (as Charley Noble once did) a rousing chorus of:

MALE BONDING SONG

(Words & Music by Bill Gallaher © 1995
From The Last Battle
CD BGM 1002)

  

  G                                      C 

  When we learned, it was a shocking re-ve-lation 

        D                                         G 

  That somehow as men we simply hadn't grown;

                               G7                 C 

  So we looked at all you women, and your pride in feminism,

            D7                               G 

  And we started up a movement of our own.

         C  D  G         C            D 

  Now we are men, and proud to be men;

       G           C              D 

  We meet every Sa-tur-day at three;

                G                         G7 

  And we ex-plore with great per-sis-tence,

        C 

  Our mas-cu-line existence,

             D                                           G 

  Beat our drums, and run off naked through the trees.

  

  Chorus:

  G                                                C 

  Oh, we all go running naked through the trees,

      D                             G 

  As naked as a jaybird, if you please,

                                 G7 

  Oh, we throw off all our wrappings,

               C 

  And with private parts a-flapping,

        D                                     G 

  We all go running naked through the trees!

  

Yes, every weekend we all meet deep in the forest,

Where we beat our drums and fashion spears from trees;

And with our faces painted, we all get re-acquainted

With our atavistic masculinity.

For we are men and proud to be men,

We meet every Saturday at three;

And we flaunt with great pretension

Those long penile extensions,

As we all go running naked through the trees...



I guess we spent too long pretending we were something we were not,

While we hid our inner turmoil and our strife;

You thought we had a bed of roses though we stood with runny noses,

Pressed up hard against the window pane of life.

Now we are men and damn proud to be men,

We meet every Saturday at three;

And if you think it's just depravity,

You don't know what it's like to be,

A man gone running naked through the trees (It hurts!)...

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: frogprince
Date: 08 May 08 - 12:29 AM

Ohmygawd, what if she saw my peepee...

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: GUEST,Jack the Sailor
Date: 08 May 08 - 01:03 AM

Time for beans!!

mmmm beans mmmmm

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: GUEST,Jack the Sailor
Date: 08 May 08 - 01:08 AM

Cards anyone?

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 08 May 08 - 02:25 AM

OK, just nobody piss in the fire again!

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: catspaw49
Date: 08 May 08 - 02:57 AM

Aw geeziz..........bonding round the fire my ass......................just fuck y'all......I don't do circle jerks.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: eddie1
Date: 08 May 08 - 03:00 AM

Just got this in an e-mail this morning:

BBQ RULES
We are about to enter the summer and BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity, as it's the only type of cooking a 'real' man will do, probably because there is an element of danger involved.

When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:

Routine...

(1)The woman buys the food.
(2)The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
(3)The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - drink in hand.

Here comes the important part:

(4)THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

More routine...

(5)The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
(6)The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another drink while he deals with the situation.
>
Important again:

(7)THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

More routine...

(8)The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.
(9)After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.

And most important of all:
(10)Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
(11)The man asks the woman how she enjoyed 'her night off.' And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women...

Eddie

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Amos
Date: 08 May 08 - 03:06 AM

Damn, who let that fuzzy-headed broad into the thread?


A

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 08 May 08 - 04:05 AM

We could let Megan join us.
Come on in Meg, get your kit off.
After all I know how nice you look in pink, I have the photo's as proof!


G

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Victor in Mapperton
Date: 08 May 08 - 04:16 AM

I saw enough of that on Brokeback Mountain. And you know what that lead to !

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: John Hardly
Date: 08 May 08 - 05:46 AM

did one of you guys borrow my darning needle?

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 08 May 08 - 06:18 AM

UhOh! Darn it!

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: artbrooks
Date: 08 May 08 - 08:19 AM

The last time I did any male bonding around a fire was when a group of us were putting out a small brush fire, and finished it off in the traditional manner. Of course, there weren't any "ladies" peekin'...

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 08 May 08 - 08:32 AM

5

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Bill D
Date: 08 May 08 - 08:46 AM

Hmmm...I see (or rather, I DON'T see) Little Hawk standing on the sidelines, letting everyone else pretend that they know what the heck one does to 'bond'...(other than the super glue idea).

Myself, I don't think I have ever even contemplated putting out a campfire with 'processed' beer.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 08 May 08 - 08:54 AM

Boy, this is really heart-warming, isn't it? Such a response since last night. Wow. There's enough material here to keep a men's psychotherapist busy for years. Ooooo-weeee.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 May 08 - 09:02 AM

Well, I gotta go now. Gotta teach a bunch of women about shooting guns this afternoon.




























(Really!)

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Peace
Date: 08 May 08 - 10:16 AM

. . . and not ONE mention of sheep?

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Big Mick
Date: 08 May 08 - 11:05 AM

No sheep, but Bossy the stump trained cow is just around the corner......

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Peace
Date: 08 May 08 - 11:12 AM

Yeah. Heard the one about the French Foreign Legion and the camel?

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Amos
Date: 08 May 08 - 12:10 PM

In actual male-bonding expeditions, I don't think dirty jokes are part of the ritual. They are symptomatic ofmen who have lost their centers and are still trying to recover their balance within, you see.

A

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 08 May 08 - 12:12 PM

And that would include, oh, about 99% of the men out there, right?

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 08 May 08 - 12:44 PM

You're kidding, right? Why, I haven't even dared open that other thread... ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: artbrooks
Date: 08 May 08 - 12:53 PM

Nah, LH...only the ones who ain't vet'rans and REpublicans....

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: PoppaGator
Date: 08 May 08 - 01:05 PM

Fuck that campfire; you guys can come over to my house to watch sports on TV. Don't forget to bring beer!

The wife is off to the beach this afternoon for a four-day weekend with her girlfriends. Hornets & Spurs tip off at 8:30 Central. I'm open to suggestion for what to watch Friday evening and Saturday afternoon, but I must insist that we watch Game Four of New Orleans at SanAntonio on SAturday night.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: gnu
Date: 08 May 08 - 01:56 PM

Now yer talkin! As long as we can watch hockey too. I AM a Canuck, so, it's, like, required, eh? Ya Know?

BTW... LH... I dunno about you Uppity Canadians, but down home in The Merrytimes, we usually dress up fer the woods. Parka in the winter and a Bug-Me-Not in the summer (with gloves or fly dope).

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Amos
Date: 08 May 08 - 01:56 PM

Who let that bossy broad into this thread?



A

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 08 May 08 - 01:57 PM

Yes, those scars just last and last, don't they? ;-) And what would highly paid therapists do without them?

Just wait. There is an only-Chimps thread coming up shortly too.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: gnu
Date: 08 May 08 - 02:07 PM

A... what bossy broad?

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Big Mick
Date: 08 May 08 - 02:25 PM

Women aint allowed.....*****spit*****scratch****......in this thread, so she got herself deleted. She was jes whinin' about some old shit anyway. Would someone pass me that beer? We are out of milk and I need something to wet my Cheerios........***urp***poot

***BRRRRRRAAAAAWWWWWMMMMMMPPPPPPPHHHHHH***

Someone pass me a napkin......and the roll of toilet paper....

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Amos
Date: 08 May 08 - 02:35 PM

Well, all right, boys. So answer up. Are you honoring your commitments and being true to your Inner Warrior, Wizard, Child, Spirit Animal, Elder and Higher Self?

A

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: PoppaGator
Date: 08 May 08 - 02:44 PM

gnu:

I'm willing to tune in to hockey, and learn all about it, provided yuo bring some good Canadian beer FROM CANADA ~ not that wimpy-ass waterd-down stuff they make for export to the States.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 May 08 - 02:56 PM

Git it yerself, Mick.

I went to an all-male high school and then almost immediately went into the almost-all-male Army. In high school I was in the band, because it was the ONLY co-ed activity.

Hanging around in stinkin' gym locker rooms or playing with girls? There's a choice there?

I'm gonna go teach women about guns now.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: gnu
Date: 08 May 08 - 04:00 PM

PG.... you name it and I will bring it. And, I will teach you all about REAL hockey. We'll start off with You Tube videos of Don Cherry, former coach of the Boston Bruins and the biggest mouth you ever loved to KINDA hate BUT love. Sheeee-it. We might just catch the end of a game after watchin "Grapes".

As for beer... you name it and I'll bring it. Of course, and I am goin out on a limb here, but, I drink Canuck Bud myself. It keeps me hydrated (>;-) and my head up when I'm comin over my own blueline eh.

As fer that there roundball, I love watchin it too. 'Cept that there rule about not bein able to check a guy tryin to score on yer net. Not bein able to even block him just ain't right. I mean, if ya can't knock him on his ass, what sport is there in that?

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Max
Date: 08 May 08 - 04:19 PM

OK boys, pony up. You think this fire burns by itself. We need 15 MB/s of firewood and the matches cost a quarter, not to mention the stones for the pit we had to dig with a shovel I bought in the general store, my horse is thirsty and don't get me started on the beans, plus all this time I'm spending and the land that I had to buy to put you all up, and Mick wants toilet paper? What do you think this is the 4 seasons?....

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Peace
Date: 08 May 08 - 04:24 PM

Don Cherry could teach the world how to dress. Tasteful and elegant.

Mick's a wimp. Toilet paper. Shees. Save a tree. Wipe yer arse on an owl!

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Peace
Date: 08 May 08 - 04:30 PM

Most people would kill to actually own a jacket like this one . . . .

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 08 May 08 - 04:39 PM

Is that a quarter each your lordship sir?


G

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Willie-O
Date: 08 May 08 - 04:39 PM

Firewood don't come in megabytes Max. Everybuddy knows you get it by the chord.

Although I would urge that no one take the "firewood" reputation of 70's Gibsons literally....and Ovations don't burn right....

W-O

Apparently I'm batchin it tonight since the wife's got yoga--guess I'll throw a chicken on the fire and open another brown bottle.

Mick I don't know about your multi-coloured belching thar--not your most manly effort and didn't you used to save that code for your references to "The Fair One" as I recall? Distinctly suspect.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: artbrooks
Date: 08 May 08 - 04:41 PM

Save the owl - use the tree. Cacti are good for that, too.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 08 May 08 - 04:42 PM

Jeezus, Peace! I was nearly blinded when I opened those links to the Don Cherry wardrobe. Did you know that he is Shane's biggest hero?

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: gnu
Date: 08 May 08 - 05:03 PM

He is THE biggest hero. That is a male bonded! Bigger than BillBoy, in my estimation.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: topical tom
Date: 08 May 08 - 05:20 PM

Hey, guys, heard this one:

                        Can you make a u(ewe)turn?
                        No, but I can make her eyes bulge.

   Now, pass the beer and let's sing some limericks!

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: JohnInKansas
Date: 08 May 08 - 05:28 PM

Slumping economy: It's a guy thing

Men are losing jobs in this downturn, while women make gains

By Peter Coy
Business Week
updated 1:05 p.m. CT, Thurs., May. 8, 2008

They eat from the same dishes and sleep in the same beds, but they seem to be operating in two different economies. From last November through this April, American women aged 20 and up gained nearly 300,000 jobs, according to the household survey of the Bureau of Labor Statistics. At the same time, American men lost nearly 700,000 jobs. You might even say American men are in recession, and American women are not.
...

So do we know who "the enemy" is now? (probably not without reading the whole article)

John

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: gnu
Date: 08 May 08 - 05:28 PM

I have had periods like that. But, not like that. The third period is the best, of course.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Peace
Date: 08 May 08 - 05:31 PM

THANK GOD! A woman! Finally get to stop talkin' about jock straps and talk about tits instead. Hell, where I come from, harass is two words.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 08 May 08 - 05:35 PM

Sports supports supports sports.

G

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: gnu
Date: 08 May 08 - 05:53 PM

Well now. The thread isn't gonna read proper if the posts from the females get deleted. Of course, now that I know they will be deteted, I shall turn my remarks specifically to the gentlemen who have posted... to wit.... Peace... yeah... tits eh!

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: gnu
Date: 08 May 08 - 07:26 PM

Gentlemen?

Well, lets at least fire up the barbie, char some mammal flesh and drink copious quantities eh?

And then watch the big screen At Poppa's with whores devoirs and Dagwoods.

Unless youse really do wanna frolic through the woods in yer... I'm with Spaw.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Tweed
Date: 08 May 08 - 07:40 PM

Hawrgs, all Canadian men ain't confused like you are they??
I listen to the Vinyl Cafe (a thinly disguised ripoff of the great Keillor) on NPR and there's another Canook show they run on Saturdays and all these hosts seem either too nice and decent or just f*cked up somehow.
What the hell is going on up above the borderline??

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 08 May 08 - 08:10 PM

No, Tweed, they are confused in other ways than me.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Bobert
Date: 08 May 08 - 09:09 PM

Yo, Tweezer... I think it's all that camp fire smoke... Them Canooks fight over the choice seatin' logs downstream from the smoke... I donno myself??? Seems like the safest spot would be on the other end of the fire... And I oughtta know seein' as I've spent a life time knowing which end of the fire to be on....

But nevermind that...

What I wanta know is this....

Ahhhhhhh, danged if I know... See, ya made me loose my consentration.... Now ya feel better???

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 May 08 - 09:17 PM

Okay, the gals are gone and guns are locked up. I can have a drink now.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Bobert
Date: 08 May 08 - 09:18 PM

Here's to ya, Rap...

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 08 May 08 - 10:15 PM

My son-in-law is really into the men's movement crap. He's an asshole. If he's a typical men's movement guy, I'll have no truck with it, thank you very much.

Anyway, I've got several acres of my own woods to wander around naked in any time I want.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: GUEST,lox
Date: 09 May 08 - 12:34 PM

Lox, stalking a deer with a bow and arrow in his hand (ok just indulge the fantasy alright) overhears the sound of LH squealing like a pig ...

... Damn ...

... I told him this was a bad idea ...

... Meanwhile peace just rocked back and forth on the porch, banjo in hand, a slightly creepy smile on his otherwise expressionless face ...

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 May 08 - 12:57 PM

Kill the pig! Kill the pig!

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: topical tom
Date: 09 May 08 - 01:08 PM

Singing that was a very good rhyme;
   Sing me another one, just like the other one,
   Sing me another one, do ooo.

   There once was...

   (What can I say? I love the three s's-singing, suds, and sex, not necessarily in that order).

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: PoppaGator
Date: 09 May 08 - 01:27 PM

BWL, you have my sympathy. I couldn't imagine being even halfway related to anyone who takes that shit seriously. I thought that mycommon-law son-in-law was an asshole, but he's not that insufferable.

I'm in Hornets withdrawal this morning. I suppose it was inevitable that the Spurs win one at home, just as Dallas did in the first round, so I'm not too worried ~ yet.

The plus side is that I put a little more time into my guitar-picking after watching that tough loss than I had been doing of late. Turned the tube off right at the final buzzer instead of obsessively watching every possible post-game show, then SportsCenter and maybe even the wee-wee-hours rebroadcast of the game.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Amos
Date: 09 May 08 - 03:58 PM

Well -- I am not sure what "that shit" consists of, PG, but those I know who participated in The Mankind Project came away from their initial weekend deeply moved and dramatically changed by the experience -- more forthcoming, more honest, less assertive, and more in communication than they had been when they went in.

So whatever they did it must have been some good medicine for 'em. According to those who was there, these changes were typical for over 90% of the attendees, about thirty in number for one weekend retreat. But it wasn't in the woods, it was at a camp site with cabins and bunks.

Dunno about running naked, nobody said anything 'bout that.


A

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Tweed
Date: 09 May 08 - 04:07 PM

What was wrong with 'em to begin with Amos? Were they all insane or crazed abusive people or what?

Hmm...the google ad down below says "Hung Men in Speedos"....
bizarre..

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Bonzo3legs
Date: 09 May 08 - 04:46 PM

Male bonding is for queers.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 09 May 08 - 04:48 PM

Spookie Men's Chorale

We are the spooky men
We dream of mastodons
Practice a serious handshake
And we can grow beards if we want to...

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: PoppaGator
Date: 09 May 08 - 05:01 PM

Amos, you almost got me to apologize and make a retraction; then I read the next couple of posts and changed my mind back again.

I think Tweed is onto something in asking "What was wrong with 'em to begin with?"

In my experience (or in my opinion, anyway), people who bubble over with enthusiasm over some supposedly revelatory new-age ritual are folks who were excessively clueless beforehand, and then rose to a level of awareness (both self- and other-awareness) that I would consider to be no more than "baseline," or simply normal, for an unspoiled independent adult. As always, of course, YMMV.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 May 08 - 05:36 PM

Iffen you guys all lived in the REAL West when Men are Men and women wear pants too, you wouldn't be runnin' around nekkid beating drums. Nope. You'd be out doin' what REAL men. You'd be hitchin' up yer gun belt, pulling yer hat down a tad to shade yer eyes from the noonday sun, loosenin' yer gun in yer holster, and moseyin' out inta the street to deal with




















yes, dear. I'll get right to it. Yes, I know the lawn looks awful. Right away dear.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Donuel
Date: 09 May 08 - 05:47 PM

In college the dead drunks got no mercy. None of that shaving cream trick on sound sleepers could compare to "male bonding".
The guys who took Ludes and drank were oblivious to being stripped and having their dick super glued to another guy's dick. When size would not allow, glueing dick to ass cheek was next best.

It really was a public service...

Those guys never took Ludes and drank again.






This legend is 100% untrue and was cut from the movie "There's something about Mary'.



...which is also untrue.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 09 May 08 - 05:56 PM

Thank God for the Atlantic Ocean...

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: GUEST,Gingganggoolygirly
Date: 09 May 08 - 06:53 PM

For you boys having trouble getting your fire to stay aflame.

Some help from The Girl Guides


There now, see how much warmer you're all feeling? ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Tweed
Date: 09 May 08 - 07:31 PM

Hey, those girls is bonding!

google ads: Double Seat Briefs!

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: GUEST,Androgynous joe clone
Date: 09 May 08 - 07:32 PM

To John in Kansas

It's part of the recession. They know they can get the chicks for less!

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Skivee
Date: 09 May 08 - 10:38 PM

Burp, fart, belch, poot,braaaaat, poot, standing piss.
Thank for letting me contribute to the free flow of ideas in this post.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 09 May 08 - 10:55 PM

LOL! Well, I started this thread not because I have much, if any, interest in male bonding (Gaaaaahhh!), but just as a spinoff joke from the women only thread...and then see what happens.

I must say that it has proven to be a rich subject which draws plently of response. Yes, McGrath, you should definitely thank God for the Atlantic Ocean. Get down on your knees and say three Hail Harry's at once, mate. ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 May 08 - 05:21 AM

The US was a different place in the days of Hairy Arse Truman.


G

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: bobad
Date: 10 May 08 - 08:19 AM

When does the flatus ignition begin?

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 10 May 08 - 08:27 AM

There was a Japanese group - can;t remember their name - which was internationally reputed to be 'cheeky, outrageous' etc.

Their big stunt was doing just that bobad. Somebody brought them out to Australia, and the crowd just laughed at them, and some of the crowds even did it too!

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 May 08 - 10:50 AM

Leave us now honor the Frenchman Le Pétomane, professional farter and entertainer, who was really Joseph Pujol (June 1, 1857 - 1945). It is said that he could reproduce the sounds of music instruments, animals, and at one time reproduced the sounds of the 1906 San Francisco Earthquake. While in the Army he entertained his buddies by sucking up water and then squirting it several yards, a feat that I doubt is even in Spaw's repetoire.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Amos
Date: 10 May 08 - 10:58 AM

Now there's a male I would be very careful about bonding with.

A

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: gnu
Date: 10 May 08 - 11:38 AM

Lord dyin Moly Joseph! I'll vote for that fire now. After near summer-like weather, it's about 6C, 30kph and rainin. All the small stuff is soaked and the big stuff is runnin with sap. Pass me the gas can... I'll get er gowan... here... hold my beer.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 May 08 - 11:44 AM

Scout water, as we called it back in my Boy Scout daze. "A good Scout can start any fire with one match, as long as he has his Scout Water with him."

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: gnu
Date: 10 May 08 - 11:58 AM

Hey Rap! Throw some a them 22s in the fire when the lads ain't lookin... liven things right up eh?

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Amos
Date: 10 May 08 - 01:02 PM

Effin' eedjits. Take the bullets off them shells afore you do that, weisenheimer. You gonna put somebody's eye out, and then everybody will be sorry...


A

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 May 08 - 01:04 PM

Shucks Amos, real men don't do that.

G

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: John Hardly
Date: 10 May 08 - 01:16 PM

"While in the Army he entertained his buddies by sucking up water and then squirting it several yards"

One can only imagine how one might discover this ability. You realize, of course, that this means that he could propel himself in water without use of his arms or legs?

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: gnu
Date: 10 May 08 - 02:55 PM

Effin' eedjits? Lad. Ye gotta understand what a wood fire does ta lead before brass before ye call me an ass. Now, an unopened can of beans... that could put yer eyes out.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: GUEST,Ed T
Date: 10 May 08 - 07:00 PM

East Coast Canada bonding/the fishing trip:

A campfire around the camp, a guitar and a harmonica (canoes and fly rods in the back), plenty of black fly goop, a few jugs of mini-brew beer (substituted by local XXXX moonshine), bushnman's coffee brewing, and a donair (pita bread, onions, tomato, and donair sauce a' wait'n) on the spit.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Amos
Date: 10 May 08 - 07:03 PM

IF you say so, Gnu. Throwing shells int he fire is not sompn I ever experimented with, to tell the truth. I had my reasons for this...



A

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: skarpi
Date: 10 May 08 - 09:56 PM

hmmmmm neehhh its not enought space for all my feelings in here

so I just go out and run naked around the house roll me over in the grass over the dew witch lay on the grass , and then the fairy queen her self
will come and kiss me :>)

We Vikings think that we get a good future if we do this , so go ahead
all, and try it ? you ´ll never know .


its a free world is it not ? or am I wrong , hmmm I could be .

ATB Skarpi Iceland

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 May 08 - 11:23 PM

Skarpi, I come from Viking ancestry and I tried that. I ran naked and rolled around in the grass (it had been recently watered, because being in high desert country we rarely have dew). The Queen of the Fairies didn't kiss me, but golfers hit me with golf clubs until the police came. I tried to explain but they still put me in jail. Finally the judge (who was a friend of mine) had a mental examination done and since the examination showed clearly that I barely had enough of a mind to feed myself much less have a disturbance he let me off with a warning.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: John Hardly
Date: 11 May 08 - 06:01 AM

gotta admire stark naked honesty and self-evaluation like that. And they say men aren't introspective.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 11 May 08 - 06:13 AM

Did any of them golfers get a hole in one, Rap?


G

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: skarpi
Date: 11 May 08 - 06:44 AM

hæ Rap , I hope you did on the night time ?

runnin naked should be done on night time ? about 5 in the morning
ATB Skarpi

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 May 08 - 08:43 AM

Oh. Around 5 in the morning, huh? Not at 10:30 in the morning while a golf tournament is in session. Okay, I'll try it again.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 11 May 08 - 10:04 AM

I bet that took balls, Rap.

G

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 May 08 - 01:14 PM

100! 100 posts of utter bollocks. Well done, lads.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Amos
Date: 11 May 08 - 01:14 PM

Rebonding and rebounding in one fell foop!!

A

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: gnu
Date: 11 May 08 - 05:04 PM

It doesn't have to end here.... I am confident there are countless posts of pure and utter bollocks amongst us if we just give it our worst! Or not. Whatever.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 11 May 08 - 05:09 PM

OK, let's start a thread called Mudbollox, for men only. that should upset those womenz that gripe about not being able to post on menz threads.
Do we complain about not being able to post on their threads, about menstrual cycles?
WE DO NOT!!
Yet we suffer from them too. Well THEY make sure we suffer anyway :)


G


It may be time to build a bomb shelter.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Peace
Date: 11 May 08 - 06:15 PM

If I'm gonna end up in a bomb shelter, Giok, it's gonna be with a bunch of women, NOT a bunch of guys. No offense.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 11 May 08 - 06:24 PM

None taken Bruce, and I hope you'll not be upset when I mention the fact, that you're not my sort of girl either.

G

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: frogprince
Date: 11 May 08 - 06:24 PM

And I hate (but not too much) to tell ya, but I'd rather stroll naked down the beach with one woman I know than run naked through the woods with every male in this "place"!!

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 May 08 - 06:34 PM

Well, hell yes, FP. Fewer thorns on the beach, to mention the least thing.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Peace
Date: 11 May 08 - 07:09 PM

Run naked down the beach? Sheesh. Listenin' to most guys talk, yer gonna bang the shit outta yer knees if ya do that!

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 May 08 - 07:14 PM

Actually, I don't plan on running naked in the sun or anywhere else. I did that in my younger days, and only then because her father came home early.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Peace
Date: 11 May 08 - 11:42 PM

LOL

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Phot
Date: 12 May 08 - 09:38 AM

What say I bring my Discovery over Stateside and go drive the "Lions Back"? Type "Moab the crash" into Y Tube and watch the sprightly decent of a Jeep driver who got it just a bit wrong! How the hell they all walked away I'll never know!

Pass the beer! Wassail!! Chris

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: gnu
Date: 12 May 08 - 09:47 AM

Phot... the technical term for that is "tight asshole".

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: PoppaGator
Date: 12 May 08 - 09:57 AM

By the way, how do we KNOW that everyone posting to this thread is indeed male? There's no telling what some people might be hiding behind their psuedonyms.

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: PoppaGator
Date: 12 May 08 - 11:19 AM

Are we gonna allow leenia's interjection to remain?

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Amos
Date: 12 May 08 - 12:22 PM

Well, see, if this were real male work, we would not fear spies or underhanded wimmins, because we would be strong and centered in our manly manliness.


A

Subject: RE: BS: Male Bonding round the fire - Men only!!
From: Phot
Date: 12 May 08 - 12:29 PM

Gnu,

I prefer.....

      Ssssshhhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittt!!

Wassail!! Chris