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BS: Tavern Rites of Spring

alison 25 Mar 01 - 06:46 AM
Amergin 25 Mar 01 - 12:03 AM
hesperis 24 Mar 01 - 07:46 PM
Lonesome EJ 24 Mar 01 - 03:46 PM
Morticia 24 Mar 01 - 03:39 PM
Lonesome EJ 24 Mar 01 - 01:34 PM
Micca 24 Mar 01 - 01:16 PM
SINSULL 24 Mar 01 - 11:56 AM
Lonesome EJ 24 Mar 01 - 12:32 AM
hesperis 23 Mar 01 - 08:21 PM
Morticia 23 Mar 01 - 07:01 PM
Micca 23 Mar 01 - 04:59 PM
Morticia 23 Mar 01 - 03:52 PM
MMario 23 Mar 01 - 03:04 PM
Morticia 23 Mar 01 - 03:04 PM
hesperis 23 Mar 01 - 02:54 PM
Micca 23 Mar 01 - 02:16 PM
Morticia 23 Mar 01 - 02:12 PM
SINSULL 23 Mar 01 - 12:27 PM
Ella who is Sooze 23 Mar 01 - 11:47 AM
Micca 23 Mar 01 - 11:42 AM
Ella who is Sooze 23 Mar 01 - 11:33 AM
SINSULL 23 Mar 01 - 11:08 AM
Ella who is Sooze 23 Mar 01 - 11:01 AM
SINSULL 23 Mar 01 - 10:54 AM
Ella who is Sooze 23 Mar 01 - 10:09 AM
GUEST,Matt_R 23 Mar 01 - 10:05 AM
Ella who is Sooze 23 Mar 01 - 10:05 AM
MMario 23 Mar 01 - 10:01 AM
GUEST,Matt_R 23 Mar 01 - 09:52 AM
alison 23 Mar 01 - 09:47 AM
Big Mick 23 Mar 01 - 09:42 AM
Ella who is Sooze 23 Mar 01 - 09:00 AM
GUEST,Matt_R 23 Mar 01 - 08:45 AM
GUEST,micca at work. 23 Mar 01 - 08:41 AM
alison 23 Mar 01 - 08:37 AM
SINSULL 23 Mar 01 - 08:31 AM
GUEST,Matt_R 23 Mar 01 - 08:25 AM
Ella who is Sooze 23 Mar 01 - 05:19 AM
GUEST,Crocus Thighs 22 Mar 01 - 11:59 AM
SINSULL 22 Mar 01 - 11:39 AM
GUEST 22 Mar 01 - 11:18 AM
SINSULL 22 Mar 01 - 09:55 AM
alison 22 Mar 01 - 09:46 AM
SINSULL 22 Mar 01 - 09:38 AM
alison 22 Mar 01 - 09:31 AM
GUEST,micca at work 22 Mar 01 - 07:32 AM
Matt_R 22 Mar 01 - 12:39 AM
hesperis 22 Mar 01 - 12:24 AM
alison 22 Mar 01 - 12:00 AM

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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: alison
Date: 25 Mar 01 - 06:46 AM

er.... Mick........

I've got the funniest sensation that we're being watched.......

ARRRRGGGHHHHHHHH

we ARE being watched.........

alison runs off to hide over here

yep you've guessed it.. follow the clicky to the next installment.......... *grin*


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Amergin
Date: 25 Mar 01 - 12:03 AM

Bacchus took Micca into the olive groves? What was he doing to the poor man? on second thought I don't want to know.....


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: hesperis
Date: 24 Mar 01 - 07:46 PM

(New thread, please, this one is getting long...)


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 24 Mar 01 - 03:46 PM

Get the video camera. Damn! Lookit that. Didn't know your back could bend that way.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Morticia
Date: 24 Mar 01 - 03:39 PM

Oh man, do you know how many times I have had to carry Micca, as drunk as a carrot, out of olive groves???Oh yes, of course you do, you're Bacchus, you put him there in the first place. While we're here ( and is he getting heavier or is it just me?) you might want to know that your sacrifice has just run off with a nymph and that last bolt of lightening scorched all the leaves off the grove where Alison and Mick are being 'educational'.Should we tell them or should I go get the video camera?


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 24 Mar 01 - 01:34 PM

OK, this lightning matter is becoming serious. Lifeguard says everyone out of the wine vat! Here, I'll get Micca's right arm if someone can grab his left. One..two..three...up you go, lad.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Micca
Date: 24 Mar 01 - 01:16 PM

"Toga or not Toga
that is the question ?
wHether it is knobblier in the mire
to suffer the bolts
an brickbats of outraged deities
or take up arms
against a tub of grape juice
and by so doing
Vintage.....hic... "
and subsides into a drunken stupor at the side of the tub.
clutching an amphora, and muttering
" you are my scumble,,,my only scumble...


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 24 Mar 01 - 11:56 AM

Lavender Blue Dilly Dilly...sorry Bacchus. You inspired me.

THWACK!!!!!

Damn Zeus! That was my last toga. All I have left now is a polyester pants suit.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 24 Mar 01 - 12:32 AM

Bacchus, wearing snorkel and mask, emerges from grape juice, now died a sort of regal purple from head to toe

I've been down there over an hour digging the pistonoid, workmanlike movements of your feet, and i have to say I'm damned impressed, especially in the middle of my back where Big Mick stepped on me. You are all to be commended. Anybody want to borrow the snorkel?

Now where's that danged virgin? My juice-proof watch tells me it's quarter til sacrifice o'clock! But you know, I don't like the look of those thunderheads building up around Olympus there. I believe my step-Dad Dr Zeus might be cooking up a few lightning bolts for my guests.

RRRRRRuuuummmmbllle


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: hesperis
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 08:21 PM

Nothing even remotely alcoholic is comparable to Scumble.

Very cool, Morty! Unfortunately, I just can't do the blues. (It doesn't work... I'll tell Jande about this thred though. She can do the blues.)


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Morticia
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 07:01 PM

Not compared to Scumble, it isn't.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Micca
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 04:59 PM

Morty, isnt STROOOOOOOH!!!!! enough??


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Morticia
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 03:52 PM

Ahhh, the stuff that's made of apples......mostly. He can't have that in his hip flask, it would eat it.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: MMario
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 03:04 PM

Micca - where did you get some of Nanny Ogg's cider?


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Morticia
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 03:04 PM

I just made it up on the spot, Hesp.....feel free to add on and/or use, just as you like :)


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: hesperis
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 02:54 PM

Morty - where did you find that? Or did you just write it? I love it!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Micca
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 02:16 PM

Ella, it is actually Rum flavoured " death on wheels" of the kind that you dont swallow, you take it in your mouth and it evaporates, straight into the head....WOW!!!! ask LtS, and assorted others that have tried it.
Sins, that is the invocationfor a very different spring festival... do you think Matt could do a Sgt Howie ?????


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Morticia
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 02:12 PM

A more up to date translation for the blues singers amongst might more closely resemble the following:

Woke up this morning, found my virgin child was gone
Woke up this morning, found my virgin child was gone
The Dark Lord come on in and ravished
That little child of Persephone

Don't you hate it when that happens,wearer of green shoots done got my girl?
Hate it when that happens, wearer of green shoots got my girl?
Guess it's reasonable compensation
For being Lord of the Underworld


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 12:27 PM

Micca - we couldn't find a maiden. Matt will have to do. And Ella - that's the wrong chant. Turn to Page 356. You've lost yourself in the sea shanties again.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 11:47 AM

Rum..........yum rum yum rum yum!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Micca
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 11:42 AM

Sins, you forgot the bit about" Come Kore, Maiden come, bring Holy hours of thy most Holy Spring.....and so long as there is no Savlon in the offing (ask Liz the Squeak) will retain my kilt...The falsk always contains some strange and Outlandish alcholic beverage, at present it is Stroh rum, (60% by Volof Alcohol, 120 proof UK, 160 proof US)


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 11:33 AM

I thought you were reading out the contents of your medicine cabinet

E


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 11:08 AM

OK Now. Pay attention. While Matt is off brushing his teeth, let's start the incantaions. Didn't want to scare the poor boy with all that "eater of raw flesh" stuff. Don't want to tie him down if we don't have to. Shame he doesn't drink...Oh well. Here goes:

Dionysou thymiama styraka

Kiklêskô Dionyson Eribromon, Euastêra, Prôtogonon, Diphuê, Trigonon, Bakcheion, Anakta! Agrion, Arrêton, Kryphion, Dikerôta, Dimorphon! Kissobryon, Taurôpon, Arêion, Euion, Hagnon! Ômadion, Trietê, Botryêphoron, Ernesipeplon! Euboleus, Polyboulos, Dios kai Persephoneiês Arrêtois lektroisi teknôtheis, Ambrote Daimon Klythi, Makar, phônês, hêdys d' epipneusoon amemphês Eumenes êtor echôn, syn euzôoisi tithênais.

I translated it for the blues singers among us
To Dionysos With storax incense

I summon Dionysos the Loud Roarer, He Who Cries Eua, Firstborn, Two-Natured, Thrice Born, Bacchic One, My Lord! Wild One, Unspeakable One, Secret One, Two-Horned and Two-Formed One! Ivy-wrapped, Bull-faced, Martial Reveler, Thou Pure One! Eater of Raw Flesh, Lord of Biennial Rites, Bearer of Grapes, Wearer of Green Shoots! Good Councilor, Frequent Councilor, Child of Zeus and of Persephonê When They joined in an ineffable Union, Thou immortal Spirit! Hear Thou, Blessed One, my voice, and gently breathe Thou upon me Kindheartedly, with Thy fair-girt Nurturers.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 11:01 AM

was wondering what that annoying little tickle was at the back of my throat was.... LMAO...Sorry.. bout that...

LOL.....OOOOOO Matron


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 10:54 AM

This from the guy who sucks his own toes!!!!!Somebody make sure he brushes his teeth before the ceremony. Just our luck to get nail clippings in the jell-o.

Oh dear gods and goddesses, Micca!! Put your kilt back on! Your getting little black curly hairs in the ambrosia and I'm scheduled for a dental check-up tomorrow!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 10:09 AM

you havnt had it in forever....

ooooooOOOOOOOHHHHHHHH....

Where's Spaw when you need him...lol


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,Matt_R
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 10:05 AM

C'mon Mario!! It's one of the world's most perfect foods!! MMmmmmm I could go for some right now. Haven't had it in FOREVER!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 10:05 AM

HURL Bluuuuarghhhhh Heck heck

Gawd... Alison is getting all the fun...

Sulk...

lol

Ella


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: MMario
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 10:01 AM

*gack!*


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,Matt_R
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 09:52 AM

I will ONLY eat ambrosia if it consists of marshmallows, pineapple chunks, mandarin oranges, and sour cream!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: alison
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 09:47 AM

oh goody goody.... we're off to the grove..... again!!!

I like nights like these.... lol.............


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Big Mick
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 09:42 AM

The biggest Mick you have ever seen sheds his breeches and does a double back flip into the tub..........

It is my understanding from THE FAIR ONE that there is grape juice to be licked here, as the Keeper of the Sacred Fertility Rites, and given where this type of activity may lead, I must insist on initiating all such activities............with the females that is..........You, the hairy one, you are outa here..........MattR, I am sorry but this could lead to the loss of virginity and we need you for finale........Right lad, FAIR ONE, could you get the lad some of that ambrosia?????.........Thanks, m'love, and I will meet you in the Oak Grove in a minute for some private instruction............


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 09:00 AM

grabs micca another amphora, sinks it into the wine slush, picks out a few bits of non descript, undescribables and hands him a few more drops....

Would prefer it if Micca left his kilt on... hem hem... afterall, what's the old saying.... better to leave some things to the imagination? *grin*

Hey.. Micca... what's in the flask, and can I have some... will it make me glow in the dark?

E


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,Matt_R
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 08:45 AM

Not my own! Geez Sins, let's not get gross here!!!

Hey Micca, shouldn't you have the kilt off and waving it around??


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,micca at work.
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 08:41 AM

A short ,fat, gnomelike figure wearing a kilt with a fitted hip flask (with "Biohazard" labels on the outside of the flask) is seen wandering around measuring up and muttering," site for the "Sargeant Howie Memorial barbecue"and "how much Whicker will I need?" and " Is "Summer is icumen in" in the DT" " Bloody Greeks, Neo-pagans,get in everywhere, and what about the Eleusinian Mysteries, no one wants to give them ago... and this Plonk Nouveau isnt bad...can I have another amphora please..."


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: alison
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 08:37 AM

Right Ella.... you started it.....

don't you realise that I (and Harpy)are undefeated jello wrestling champs........

a VERY slimy Fair One does a graceful leap across the tub.... rugby tackles Emma..... and both disappear into the goo


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 08:31 AM

Typical! Now it's deteriorating into a food fight. There you go Ella - you look elegant in ambrosia. HEE HEE her mascara is running.

Uh Matt? This is an orgy. You're supposed to be sucking on someone else's toes! How do you do that anyway?


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,Matt_R
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 08:25 AM

Toe-sucking! YE-YES!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 05:19 AM

Ella the Spritely,

Joins in the grape squishing and treads on Bacchus.

Chucks a messy handful of mush at Alison, prods Matt and throws grape goo at Sinsulls new toga.

:)


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,Crocus Thighs
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 11:59 AM

Oh my, Sinsull! I do apologize. I think all that centaur chatter brainwashed me...my small brain, mind you...heh heh. Spring fever and all.

Very bad poetry, I must say. Though technically speaking, it is a limerick...well done. ("Perhaps you are forgiven your earlier trespass," she said, wiping off the rim of the wineskin with her sap-sticky skirt...)

Nothing to drink YET; arrived in bumpy weather to sunny Clearwater, Florida. Very nauseous and dizzy and head-poundingly sick last night (good thing I DIDN'T drink on the plane!)

Much better today. Off to a small pagan gathering at a nudist camp in nearby Land o' Lakes tomorrow and Saturday!

Do I get points for REAL merrymaking with nymphs, sprites, satyrs and bacchae???

Will report back soon...eat your hearts out, but in a good way, and I shall do my best to make myself worthy of your festivities...

Peg, aka Crocus Thighs


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 11:39 AM

Peg - How the hell much have you had to drink? I am female and heterosexual. And watch the furry-groin cracks! I am freshly waxed for the festivities!

There once was a tree sprite named Peg
Who drank lilac wine from a keg
She sucked it and swilled it
Then three times refilled it
Out-guzzling Spaw, Cletus, and Reg.
You want bad poetry? I'll give you bad poetry!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 11:18 AM

Bad poetry???

Hey Sinsull, I spent a lot of time on that!

Write your own odes to Bacchus, you complaining, ungrateful little satyrical wine-swilling furry-groined cloven-hooved deflowerer of nymphs, you!!!

(Peg, aka Crocus Thighs, stomps off in a tree-spritely huff and takes all her aphrodisiac damiana wine with her...)


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 09:55 AM

I just sat on the edge and splashed. I already lost one toga to grease, red wine, and... well, no need to go into details.
Someone want to rummage around in that mess and see if you can find Bacchus. I haven't seen him in a while and we don't want him to drown.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: alison
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 09:46 AM

how did you only get your toes covered? ...... most of the rest of us fell over when we tried to do the lambada.... we're completely plastered in the stuff........


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 09:38 AM

MMMM Toe sucking! There may be hope for this party after all.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: alison
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 09:31 AM

*groan*................ lol

Hey LEJ... is the rumour true?.... you know the one about there not being any water to rinse this off.. so we have to lick each other clean??????


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,micca at work
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 07:32 AM

Could a one legged grape treader from Bordeaux be said to have one foot in the Graves????


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Matt_R
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 12:39 AM

Joy! Splat.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: hesperis
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 12:24 AM

I am sober now.

Just in time for more fun! *squish!* go the grapes...


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: alison
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 12:00 AM

WEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Splllllllllllllaaaaaaaaaaaaaassssssssssssshhhhhhhhhh....

I love jello-wrestling, but this grape squishing is good fun too.....

lets all link arms and dance Zorba the Greek ..................


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