Lyr Add: As someday it may happen (G&S)

Subject: Lyr Add: AS SOMEDAY IT MAY HAPPEN (Gilbert & S...)
From: chico
Date: 29 Oct 06 - 10:58 PM

Politically incorrect warning:

(c e g a g a g c b a (no pause) g a g a g c g e (no pause) c d c d c d e f e, low g, d, low g, c)
  
      G7
  As some day it may happen that a victim must be found,
        C     C°     C      (repeat)
  I've got a little list--I've got a little list
  Of society offenders who might well be underground,
           C      C°                  D7              G
  And who never would be missed--who never would be missed!
  
               C                           Dm/F
  There's the pestilential nuisances who write for autographs--
        C/G                            D7/A
  All people who have flabby hands and irritating laughs--
        G               C                 G                 C
  All children who are up in dates, and floor you with 'em flat--
       E7              Am                   E7                  Am
  All persons who in shaking hands, shake hands with you like that--
      C°|Bbm                                               
  And all third persons who on spoiling tete-a-tetes insist--
          G°              G             D7             G
  They'd none of 'em be missed--they'd none of 'em be missed!
  
       7               C/E        G7              C
  He's got 'em on the list-- He's got 'em on the list;
               /E 7           F              C       G7      C
  And they'll none of 'em be missed--they'll none of 'em be missed.
  
  There's the nigger serenader, and the others of his race,
  And the piano-organist--I've got him on the list!
  And the people who eat peppermint and puff it in your face,
  They never would be missed--they never would be missed!
  Then the idiot who praises, with enthusiastic tone,
  All centuries but this, and every country but his own;
  And the lady from the provinces, who dresses like a guy,
  And who "doesn't think she waltzes, but would rather like to try";
  And that singular anomaly, the lady novelist--
  I don't think she'd be missed--I'm sure she'd not he missed!
  
  CHORUS.        He's got her on the list--
          he's got her on the list;
          And I don't think she'll be missed--
          I'm sure she'll not be missed!
  
  And that Nisi Prius nuisance, who just now is rather rife,
  The Judicial humorist--I've got him on the list!
  All funny fellows, comic men, and clowns of private life--
  They'd none of 'em be missed--they'd none of 'em be missed.
  And apologetic statesmen of a compromising kind,
  Such as--What d'ye call him--Thing'em-bob, and likewise--Never-mind,
  And 'St--'st--'st--and What's-his-name, and also You-know-who--
  The task of filling up the blanks I'd rather leave to you.
  But it really doesn't matter whom you put upon the list,
  For they'd none of 'em be missed--
  they'd none of 'em be missed!
  
  You may put 'em on the list--you may put 'em on the list;
  And they'll none of 'em be missed--they'll none of 'em be missed!
  
  (All same speed: (C°) high g f# f e d c b d lowg b c)
  
  [Ko-Ko's aria from The Mikado]

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: As someday it may happen (G&S)
From: Flash Company
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 10:30 AM

Never really used this one in my career as a parodist, can't think why, dear old John Reed always included an up to date reference in his performances as Ko-ko. However, I can never resist a challenge:-

There's the second string celebs with the black windscreens on their cars,
I've got 'em on the list, I've got 'em on the list,
And that TV presenter who has trouble with his 'r's'
He drives me round the twist, so put him on the list,
There are various football managers who all sing a sim'lar tune,
That they're sicker than a parrot or somewhere beyond the moon,
There's the government spin doctors who will rabbit on all night,
And try to prove that right is wrong, or even black is white,
And that most peculiar fellow, the tabloid journalist,
I've got him on the list, he must be on the list!

CH

FC