BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Apr 04 - 08:05 PM

No. Germans usually call dachsunds "dachles" (dah-k'lz), which is an affectionate term. When a German says "frankfurter", he means a human being from Frankfurt. When an American says frankfurter, he means a hotdog. When a German says "weiner" (vee-ner), he means either a sausage or a person from Vienna! I am sure that German Baptists venerate dachles almost as they would sacred objects.

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: 42
Date: 25 Apr 04 - 07:28 AM

Do they call weiner dogs frankfurters in Europe?
j

and do Baptists across the sea have more respect for this molehill of a breed?

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: GUEST
Date: 24 Apr 04 - 05:05 PM

scootertrash
But baptists DO honor weiner dogs

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: dianavan
Date: 23 Apr 04 - 05:21 PM

They'll eat anything! My mother has a wiener dog that recently ate the end of a bic lighter. We wondered why he was coughing until we found the mangled lighter. He's O.K. now.

This is her 3rd wiener dog. The first one died while white water rafting. The dog was tied to the raft when the raft tipped over. All the people were saved but the little dog went down the river with the raft. His name was JoJo. Her second was Joey and this one is called J.J.

Me and my brothers (we're all in our fifties) admit to being jealous of the little creatures. We feel like we have been replaced by a wiener. I'm not a Baptist but I don't honour them either. My mother honours them but she likes sex and dancing too.

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: GUEST,Valdy
Date: 23 Apr 04 - 05:01 PM

Almost anything organic is worth nosing, except maybe a skunk. I am gratified that people are at last recognizing the grievous wrong that has been done to my kind by the Baptist congregations. Every dog has his day, and we intend to have ours. We don't demand to be worshipped, only served in a way befitting our unique contribution to the world. In other words, we should always be supplied with a soft cushion or couch, fresh water, respectful service, and unlimited amounts of delicious food. I wish to stress the final point. Unlimited amounts of delicious food!

Valdy (proud to be a Dachshund)

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: 42
Date: 23 Apr 04 - 04:41 PM

but...is it really worth "nosing"
j

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Amos
Date: 23 Apr 04 - 04:24 PM

Or want to dance!

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: dianavan
Date: 23 Apr 04 - 04:16 PM

Little Hawk - They might honour the Dachshund but never the weiner dog. Weiney is a bad word and might make them think sexual thoughts.

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: el ted
Date: 23 Apr 04 - 04:46 AM

Hi brucie.Ellen you hve sussed me, I am hovering for those all important 100th posts.

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 23 Apr 04 - 04:42 AM

I thank you for your explanation Little Hawk, now in what context is ' honor ' meant.
eric

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 22 Apr 04 - 10:47 PM

A weiner dog is Mother Nature's noblest creation (with a little help from human beings)...the Dachshund! Your typical weiner dog is short and long at the same time, which is very cosmic. He's "a living contradiction, partly truth and partly fiction, takin' every wrong direction on his lonely way back home". He is both comical and courageous. He is ready to die by gluttony at any available opportunity, and would rather sleep than do almost anything at all...except EAT! He believes that stolen food always tastes better than one's own food. He believes he's getting a raw deal, and missing out on the action. He regards all rodents as totally expendable. He knows that sitting up is so irresistible that you will definitely give him the roast turkey if he just does it long enough. He knows that the nose knows all that is worth knowing.

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Apr 04 - 10:09 PM

How can you resist????

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 22 Apr 04 - 09:38 PM

What the fucking hell is a WEINER dog anyway ???????????

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Peace
Date: 22 Apr 04 - 09:08 PM

Hi el ted.

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Peace
Date: 22 Apr 04 - 09:08 PM

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Peace
Date: 22 Apr 04 - 09:08 PM

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Peace
Date: 22 Apr 04 - 09:07 PM

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Ellenpoly
Date: 22 Apr 04 - 12:30 PM

Oh, don't "interesting" us, el ted! You're just hovering here so you can count coup..xx..e

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: el ted
Date: 22 Apr 04 - 10:35 AM

Interesting.

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Ellenpoly
Date: 22 Apr 04 - 03:55 AM

Okey Dokey... I can see I'm wasting my time here. I'll leave you to your goats and weiner dogs, and go hover over at the last thread site...sigh...xx..e

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: GUEST,Seamus Kennedy
Date: 21 Apr 04 - 06:27 PM

Anything to prevent Ellenpoloy killing a perfectly thread!

Seamus

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Strick
Date: 21 Apr 04 - 05:21 PM

Madness has an internal rational all its own.

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Peace
Date: 21 Apr 04 - 04:41 PM

Shatner couldn't have said it better.

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Apr 04 - 04:37 PM

Thank you, LH. I'm proud to say that I'm humble about it.

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 21 Apr 04 - 03:38 PM

That is so cosmic! Rapaire, you are a brilliant man.

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Apr 04 - 03:13 PM

Amazing. The title to this thread makes sense, well, sort of sense, in almost any permutation!

Why don't weiners honor baptist dogs?
Why don't dogs honor baptist weiners?
Why don't honor baptists dog weiners?
Why don't baptists dog weiner honors?
Honors dog baptists. Why don't weiners?

and many others! Truly inspired!

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Ellenpoly
Date: 21 Apr 04 - 09:31 AM

Sage words from one who knows goats a bit too intimately LH...but at least the kitties of the world are again safe..xx..e

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 21 Apr 04 - 09:04 AM

Sheer persistence is the only answer, Ellenpoly. Persist beyond all reason, and one day yours WILL be the last post.

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Ellenpoly
Date: 21 Apr 04 - 05:34 AM

Oh Maaaaannn! So close to killing a thread and I lose out to a GOAT! Story of my life, guys..xx..e

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Peace
Date: 20 Apr 04 - 07:30 PM

I will come up with the million. But, if the guitar case isn't waterproof, the ink on the bills will run. What is plan B? Little Hawk is talkin' turkey. I am talkin' goat.

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 20 Apr 04 - 05:48 PM

Aww, fer Chrissakes! This is the kind of thoughtless BS I expect from Raptor when he can't find anything useful to do...

One million dollars???? YOU gotta be kidding. I know I've got good credit around here, but that's ridiculous. And I am not going to Tallahassee merely to satisfy your perverted cravings!

Let's talk turkey here. How about ten bucks and a few free Dylan tapes?

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: 42
Date: 20 Apr 04 - 05:43 PM

I've got your goat! Put $1 000 000.00 in unmarked bills in your guitar case and throw it off the Tallahasee bridge at midnight tuesday.

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 20 Apr 04 - 05:36 PM

Bruce, I gave the goat the most explicit instructions. I hope she has not gone astray. She may have been diverted along the way. Maybe we should have an APB put out on her by the highway patrol in Manitoba and Saskatchewan.

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Ellenpoly
Date: 20 Apr 04 - 04:30 AM

I'm very excited...I think I killed this thread! If so, I can retire on my laurels and forget about being the last on the other thread...please???..xx..e

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Ellenpoly
Date: 19 Apr 04 - 05:17 AM

Mmmmm CHOCOLATE Chicago Weiner Dogs!...xx..e

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 18 Apr 04 - 09:00 AM

Baptists may not honour weiners but they sure do honour my dog....everyone honours my dog..my long nosed long tailed terrier. No-one has the option but to respect and honour my dog!!! It is so special

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Peace
Date: 17 Apr 04 - 07:27 PM

Love those chocolates. Better than sex (for all I know).

Little Hawk, at risk of trivializing this otherwise serious thread, WHERE IS THE GOAT?

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: steve in ottawa
Date: 17 Apr 04 - 03:17 PM

The only good things that came out of that war:
-Dolly Madison ice cream (for the States) and
-Laura Secord chocolates (for Canada)
I think we got the better deal :-)

Anyone watch "Spellbound"? It's so weird to hear foreign words given American pronunciations. My favourite: foyer. Creme de menthe also startles me.

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 17 Apr 04 - 02:49 PM

Sometimes I use American spelling, sometimes British spelling. Why? Well, why not?

honour = honor
neighbour = neighbor
Loo-tenant = Lef-tenant
etc....

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Peace
Date: 17 Apr 04 - 02:37 PM

In eighteen-fourteen we took a little trip . . . .

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Apr 04 - 02:36 PM

Because, even though Canadian, LH spells correctly.

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Cluin
Date: 17 Apr 04 - 02:26 PM

A more important question is... why did LH spell honour that way when he opened the thread?

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: dianavan
Date: 17 Apr 04 - 03:36 AM

John - you mentioned the black, hairy thing under GW's arm. It was a Scotty. According to Donuel, Bush dropped him on the tarmac. The dog died a few days later as a result of his injuries.

I think it was an omen.

Maybe we should send him a wiener dog for solace. I think it would fit his image.

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Bill D
Date: 16 Apr 04 - 10:31 AM

did you hear about the Russian Wolfhound they wanted to breed with this cute little female weiner dog? No luck....he wouldn't stoop so low...

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: GUEST,Oscar Meyer, a proud Weiner Dog!
Date: 16 Apr 04 - 10:19 AM

I am a Dachshund, and I want to put in my two cents on this very important subject. I have long been upset by the lack of respect accorded to my species in most Christian churches and congregations. While it is true that many Christians like Dachshunds and keep them as pets, no Dachshund has ever been made a priest or a minister. We have been shut out of participating in an equal fashion. We are discouraged from singing along during hymns, although we dearly love to join in and have excellent voices. We are not allowed to mark territory or engage in normal social practices within churches either. The horrible truth is that Dachshunds are still being subjected to brutal corporal punishment for doing things as ordinary and inoffensive as marking the lectern! This shows extreme insensitivity, in my opinion, and is unconscionable. It is time that we "Weiner Dogs" attained the stature that we are due in the Christian community.

Oscar Meyer, the Third, of Dinsdale Court

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Jerry Rasmussen
Date: 16 Apr 04 - 07:14 AM

Did Freud really wear a slip?

Jerry

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Ellenpoly
Date: 16 Apr 04 - 06:09 AM

Mmmm Chicago Weiner Dogs! Yum!..xx..e

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 16 Apr 04 - 04:50 AM

Old jokes huh!
What's the difference between a street trader, and a dachshund?
One bawls out his wares on the street.
While the other wears out his *****

John

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: Seamus Kennedy
Date: 16 Apr 04 - 01:10 AM

Our dachshund has brass testicles. We call him Sparky.

Seamus not Kendall's dog

Subject: RE: BS: Why don't Baptists honor weiner dogs?
From: SueB
Date: 16 Apr 04 - 01:02 AM

Refering back to previous thread drift,

Why aren't dogs allowed in the White House?

'Cause they pee on all the Bushes....