BS: i am the talk of the town

Subject: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: GUEST,Petra
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 12:38 PM

Hi all,

My man and I split up a couple of months ago on good terms. We had worked together in a small business in a small town for a decade. Since splitting up he has been living it up with all sorts of ladies and I have had to put up with people telling me what he is doing, who with, etc.. And I am talking about unpleasant stuff. I haven't asked anybody but folk keep on telling me.

I am thoroughly embarrassed, hurt, jealous, and my pride has been pounded. I have my own "love interest" but have been so discrete nobody knows.

This hurts.

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Once Famous
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 12:40 PM

Well that's just fine.

Let's everyone talk about it.

Maybe he should post here and talk about and we can find out why he's having more fun now.

I can't believe the need to air this shit out here.

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: GUEST
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 01:17 PM

Perhaps she wants to talk about it here because she feels among friends. Yourself excepted, of course.

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Amos
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 01:25 PM

Jesus Christ, Martin, you have all the sensitivity of a rusted bulldozer. You are a proper shithead sometimes, you know that? Slapping people around at every opportunity, and then bragging about how understanding you are. What a buffoon.

Anyway, Petra, of course it hurts.

But you will get through it. Feel what is there to be felt and then move on.

If your own discreet love interest started before the divorce, that is one of the reaosns you are vulnerable to his hijinks. If you are clear of secrets and aboveboard about things, then you become invulnerable, and if he starts a slander campaign you can sue him. Otherwise, put it in the past and get on with it.


That's my 2 cents. Thanks, Martin, for shutting up long enough for me to say it.

A

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Once Famous
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 02:55 PM

That's tremendous advice to this dame, amos. Maybe you should hook up with here and pull down your pants for her.

You are so sennnnnnnnnnnnnnnsitive.

if I'm a proper shithead, then you must be an improper shithead.

Your advise was worth 1 cent. Not 2.

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: GUEST
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 02:58 PM

Maybe you should talk to Hesperis for advice.

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Peace
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 03:07 PM

Dear GUEST Petra,

I went through a divorce a while back. I never told my 'side' of the story--and I never will. My ex confided her side of things to a girlfriend of hers who told a girlfriend of hers, etc. Soon, I was on everyone's shit list. When things settled down and people could see that maybe I wasn't totally to blame (there was no abuse, cheating or crap like that involved) they began to approach me to 'make up'. Basically, I told them individually and politely that I'd sooner drink liquid shit that speak with any of them, and it remains so to this day. Sometimes ya just gotta suck it up and ignore people. Do that. Brace a few who have to 'tell you' what your ex is upto. Besides, you have a boyfriend of your own, so what do your ex's activities have to do with you anymore anyway? Ignore them and move on.

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 03:18 PM

Similar situation with me..soon found out that my Ex had a new man in her life...from her (supposed) friends. True friends are loyal and trustworthy...and are few!
Like Brucie says Petra...move on...let people think and say what they want..it will all die a death and true friends will stick by you...if you have no friends from then...you didn't have any anyway...just hangers on.
Best wishes, Mike.

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Hawker
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 03:32 PM

Petra, just hold in your head the knowledge that one day soon someone else will split and then people will forget about you and talk about someone else! Time is a great healer.
Cheers, Lucy

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Peace
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 03:51 PM

Petra: A sure-fire conversation stopper is, "Thank you. I'll let him know you told me."

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Bert
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 03:52 PM

Don't worry about it. The time to start worrying is when people STOP talking about you.

Dust off your sense of humor, and laugh at 'em.

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Peace
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 04:00 PM

"I am thoroughly embarrassed, hurt, jealous . . . "

Sounds a bit strange to me. What right do you have being jealous? Don't YOU have a boyfriend? Like, is this a 'cake and eat it, too' type thing?

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Peace
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 04:01 PM

Anyway--have a good life. I'm outta here.

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: GUEST
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 04:19 PM

The two of you broke up. He has a right to do whatever he wants to whomever he wants. It's none of your concern anymore so forget him.
Stop crying and get control of your life. You sound rather pathetic.

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Once Famous
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 04:20 PM

Some good sex will help make her forget.

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: SINSULL
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 04:40 PM

Petra,
You don't have to "put up with" anything. When the gossips start, tell them gently but firmly that you and he are no longer together and have moved on with your lives. End of discussion.

Interest will die.
SINS

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: *Laura*
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 05:01 PM

I am so impressed with your maturity and sensitivity Martin - it rivals that of the people I spend most of my time with.
Fellow college students.

:-p

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Once Famous
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 05:04 PM

I'm glad that you are impressed Laura.

College students tend to have a lot of fun. there are other ways and times to take life seriosuly.

Mudcat isn't it for me. It's my college campus, I guess.

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Wolfgang
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 05:52 PM

A sure-fire conversation stopper is, "Thank you. I'll let him know you told me." /Brucie)

I'm not sure I could do it in a similar situation, but the thought alone doing it makes me grin. Good advice.

Wolfgang

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 05:55 PM

Not that I wish to malign sufferers from what must be a terrible affliction but, have you ever been checked out for Tourette's Syndrome Martin?
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Once Famous
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 06:01 PM

Yes, and everything else, also.

Totally healthy.

Have you ever been checked out for whining? embarrassing easy? offending easy? nightmares of yourself in a porno movie? why you are uneasy when you see a female genitalia?

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: GUEST
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 01:02 AM

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand - martini in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming

"Woooooo hooooo ......WHAT A RIDE!"

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Peace
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 01:09 AM

I did something like that at the Mariposa Folk Festival (in around 1970 (?)). Was going from one floor of the hotel to a lower floor one evening--lotsa playing going on; jamming, etc. Anyway, I had a fairly full glass of scotch in my right hand and I tripped. Tumbled down about six stairs and landed sitting on me arse with the full glass of scotch still in my right hand. I look up, and standing there was Joni Mitchell. I said, "Hi, Joni. Remember me?" She replied, "Yes I do Bruce, and you haven't changed a bit." (Sorry for the thread drift, but GUEST'S post reminded me.)

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Teresa
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 01:21 AM

Hahahahahahahahaha. That is funny, brucie. I could see myself in a similar situation. :)

As for the rest of this thread, I can't help gently pointing out that the responses sound like a cross between Jerry Springer and Dr. phil. :)

Teresa

Teresa

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Cluin
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 02:55 AM

ROFLMAO brucie

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Dewey
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 03:32 AM

MG,

I agree with Amos, your post goes beyond insult, vulgarity and plain talk. Was that it's purpose?

Maybe you should start a new F-you thread. We could call it Martin Gibson's F-you thread, because he really does't give a m**** f***** s***** about yours feelings.


NICE TO BE AMONG FRIENDS :-)

AMOS, LOOKS LIKE YOU ARE A GENTLEMAN!!!

But this will probably turn into a profanity thread for my having mentioned anything unflattering about MG here!

Dewey

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Dewey
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 03:37 AM

Actually, I am not a very good reader, Perhaps MG is right. this isn't a very good place to post all that sort of stuff.

Dewey (who can't make up his mind)

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Once Famous
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 10:45 AM

Dewey, Cheatem, and Howe

Dewey, are you the founder of this law firm? Just asking.

I'm so sorry that you are so sennnnnnnnnnnsitive. I was responding to a moron who warrants the worst.

don't let us guess what all your *****s mean.

I hope that you make up your mind.

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Blissfully Ignorant
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 12:02 PM

I've beeen the talk of many towns, for many reasons. It stops bothering you once you realise that the people doing the talking are spineless, gossip-mongering leeches who are so pathetically unfullfilled in their own lives that they have to feed off other peoples. Just grin widely, fix them with an amiable stare, and tell them to f**k off. :0)

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: GUEST,drastic solution
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 12:19 PM

you say you live in a small town..

so just exactly how many bullets
and cans of gasoline would it take
to stop the local gossips and rumour mongers
upsetting you any further..????

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: GUEST,Petra
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 12:25 PM

Thanks folks.

I had a read through but just missed out any references to Martin Gibson, and concentrated on the rest !

I love the advice to say " I'll tell him you said that." Yes, I will use that.

Also, yes, I am being a bit pathetic. At the moment I am going through lots of phases and the feelings come in waves. I go from pathetic to strong and happy, with a lot of different stuff in the middle !

I understand why you could say I have no right to be jealous, but I am not sure jealousy has to do with rights. In fact I wonder why we feel jealousy at all, but it is something that eats away at us all at some point in our lives. I want to be honest about saying that I do feel it, whether I have a right to or not.


Anyway, I do feel a lot better today and the comments have helped.

Thanks

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: gnu
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 01:55 PM

Apologies if this has already been said but I don't have a lot of time right now to read the whole thread.... if that guy hasn't the discretion to preclude numerous rumours ("all sorts of ladies") and, if that guy is actually living it up with "all sorts of ladies", you are a hell of a lot better off without the rutting pig. The talk will soon curtail his tail to the sluts he deserves. You will always have more dignity than him or anyone he ends up with.

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Peace
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 02:37 PM

Petra,

That was me who made the 'no right to be jealous' remark. It was somewhat inappropriate on my part, and your response that 'rights and jealousy' don't have to understand each other is only too true.

I think what I should have said is that maybe you should just forget the guy--and I know that is an equally stupid thing for me to say. Kinda like, "Go stand in the corner and don't think of a blue bear"

Hell, if he's out diddlin' any and everything he can get his dick into, why do you think you ever needed someone like that, huh? Move on, girl, and stop your clandestine love affair--announce it and get your life together.

Best to you,

Bruce M

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Alba
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 03:25 PM

oh and Petra ma Dear,
When the next Gossip wagger comes at ya.
I'd suggest this reply..:>)
" Is he really, well good. I told him he needed to get some experience, he bored me senseless in that department. Hope he doesn't bore the others like he did me and learns something while he's at it!"
Just hold this thought, you have found A new man to have a relationship now. The Ex on the other hand is having to go around an awful lot of Women trying to replace you...big grin....
Take care darlin, this will pass.
Blessings
Jude

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 03:49 PM

You could say 'Well he certainly needs to practice'
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: GUEST
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 03:55 PM

Or you could say that you decided enough was enough when he contracted genital warts.

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: gnu
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 03:58 PM

Didn't think that one through, did ya ?

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: GUEST
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 04:02 PM

yes.

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: gnu
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 04:05 PM

I beg to differ. Think again.

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: GUEST
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 06:19 PM

Hes a guest. He dosent have to think again. A garg of the pits

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: GUEST
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 06:23 PM

We're all "Guests" if we come in through the emergency server.

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: GUEST
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 06:26 PM

Yes, no and maybe

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: GUEST
Date: 14 Jan 05 - 08:47 PM

Three recommended responses to these volunteer informers:

Oh, did I ask you about that sort of thing?

What in world would make you tell me that sort of thing?

What in the world would make you think I'm interested in that?

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: open mike
Date: 15 Jan 05 - 01:35 AM

he should be the one em-bare-assed
it sounds like he is making an ass
of himself--i certainly hope he is
practicing safe sex or it will come
back to haunt him and everyone else
he is screwing around with...glad
you are safely out of that loop!

i have heard that if you "sleep"
with someone you are in effect
doing it with everyone they ever did
it with! that encourages safe practices!

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: GUEST
Date: 15 Jan 05 - 05:11 AM

That last bit's certainly a sobering thought Mike, quite made my toes curl.
Giok :~/

Subject: RE: BS: i am the talk of the town
From: Peace
Date: 16 Jan 05 - 02:48 AM

. . . and with everyone THEY ever did it with, and that THEY vever did it with and that . . . .