Folk cyberflashing

Subject: Folk cyberflashing
From: Jack Campin
Date: 11 Feb 26 - 10:06 AM

This is a grotesque story.

Eliza Carthy's experience with a compulsive cyberflasher

Eliza posted that on her own FB timeline. Police being a chocolate teapot as usual.

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: The Sandman
Date: 11 Feb 26 - 01:11 PM

Disgraceful

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: Manitas_at_home
Date: 11 Feb 26 - 01:45 PM

The perpetrator was prosecuted the other day. He hAd several victims in England and Scotland so I expect there was a lot of liaison over different police forces but they got the job done.

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 11 Feb 26 - 02:06 PM

He was given a 12-month sentence suspended for two years on Monday after admitting sending images of his genitals to the singer and another woman with the intention of causing distress or humiliation.

And this kind of sentence is why he keeps doing it.

Meanwhile, she should have blocked him the first time it happened. She should have turned off her phone. Not kept it in her bedroom. Mute it at night. There are many ways to stop his access, many of them inconvenient to the recipient, but once she had the screenshots of his unsent messages or a couple of the man in action, use those to turn him in to authorities then block him, and move on.

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: Helen
Date: 11 Feb 26 - 03:50 PM

At the top of the page which Jack Campin provided a link for, also has a link to BBC article by Nicola Goodwin

'He sent me reams of naked photos': Victims of cyberflasher speak out


How does he keep on getting away with these crimes?

And in the article, Eliza Carthy said that she had to keep her phone on during the night because she is a single parent and has been caring for her father.

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 11 Feb 26 - 04:22 PM

In which case, she can set her phone on Do Not Disturb and put in exception numbers that can get through. (My phone is programmed to automatically be in Do Not Disturb from 11pm to 7am, but my kids, ex, and the neighbors on each side and across the street are the exceptions.)

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: Helen
Date: 11 Feb 26 - 04:48 PM

[Oh, all you tech-savvy wizards! I salute you. :-D ]

Good idea.

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: Jack Campin
Date: 11 Feb 26 - 06:44 PM

Asking people to do weird and inconvenient things to avoid an attacker is blaming the victim. What next, move house, change her name and carry a gun? She has a life and a career to get on with, and an ailing father to support. And we all know how well blocking phone numbers doesn't work.

The police could have got the attacker's ISP and phone provider to silence him. They didn't. They didn't do their job.

The offender seems to have been mentally ill and not in control of his actions. That doesn't let the police off the hook. Their remit is protecting the public, not just dragging people into court.

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 11 Feb 26 - 10:37 PM

No one is blaming the victim here, Jack. Being proactive in preventing the crap coming through—that is something someone else should have showed her how to do if she didn't know how to set her phone herself.

The slap on the wrist that this guy got is offensive and inadequate. He deserves some jail time.

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: Helen
Date: 12 Feb 26 - 01:31 AM

Karma has kicked in a bit. According to that BBC article, some music organisations are refusing to let him perform at their events.

This has triggered some disturbing memories of experiences I have had in my younger days. Luckily I managed to get out of them without negative consequences. Three of the experiences occurred on trains where there was limited chance of fully getting away from the potential perps, but it turned out ok. I think my spidey-senses kicked in and forewarned me of possible trouble. Even after all these years I still remember and re-experience that sense of powerlessness and terror and the only saving grace for those emotions is my lucky escape in each case. There but for the grace of God...

One of the lovely, gentle older men in our (now-defunct) music session group said one day, with no explanation or context, "Woman can be really vulnerable sometimes". I said "yes" and thought of those experiences. I suspect his wife may have been subjected to something unpleasant.

I suspect the reason I stopped being targeted over time is that I turned into an unattractive old woman - and that I am a loud-mouthed troublemaker who takes no $h1t from anyone. There are silver linings to some things in life. LOL

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: The Sandman
Date: 12 Feb 26 - 02:07 AM

The slap on the wrist that this guy got is offensive and inadequate. He deserves some jail time. quote
The jails in the uk are full.

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: The Sandman
Date: 12 Feb 26 - 02:27 AM

The reason for this situation, is because of court backlogs, long prison sentences, and not enough prisons being built.
I would suggest some form of public humiliation for offenders like this, Bring back the stOcks?

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: The Sandman
Date: 12 Feb 26 - 02:36 AM

No one is blaming the victim here, Jack. Being proactive in preventing the crap coming through—that is something someone else should have showed her how to do if she didn't know how to set her phone herself. QUOTE
boloney,
in the real world no one blames a victim of flashing, for going outside their house. you are also clearly ignorant of the uk jail situation

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: Helen
Date: 12 Feb 26 - 09:39 AM

The Sandman, SRS was making a technical suggestion to make life easier by avoiding contact from the perp on her phone while maintaining contact from the people in her life who mean a lot to her.

This is not victim blaming in any way, shape or form. It is a useful and helpful tool which she and others could use.

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 12 Feb 26 - 10:26 AM

Dick is entirely into personal attacks, he's not reading with any common sense. Like the jails in the US aren't packed full. Sentences are still handed down.

Someone needed to give Ms Carthy some assistance if she was receiving these nauseating and persistent messages, if she didn't know how to block them herself. And he belongs in jail.

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: GUEST,johnmc
Date: 12 Feb 26 - 11:05 AM

The Queen has been relating how as a young woman she had to fend off a bloke on the train.
I think it involved kneeing him, but the memory of the trauma has lived with her.
To her credit she invoked it to support women.

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 12 Feb 26 - 11:14 AM

When you say Queen I think of Elizabeth II, but are you talking about Camilla? Didn't know that.

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: GUEST,johnmc
Date: 12 Feb 26 - 11:54 AM

Camilla, fairly recently. It was well reported at the time.

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: Backwoodsman
Date: 12 Feb 26 - 01:15 PM

SRS is right. In this day and age when the world is full of crack-pots, it makes absolute sense to take whatever steps are available to protect oneself from personal attacks and abuse

On SM, e.g Facebook, and most, if not all, modern mobile phones, there’s a ‘block’ facility which prevents unwanted contact. It’s a pity we don’t have the same on the PM system on this forum.

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: Helen
Date: 12 Feb 26 - 01:37 PM

The Queen. Yes, of course. I automatically think it is Elizabeth II and forget that Camilla now has the title. (Note: I don't think I would want to cross her in a fight. I know who would win. LOL)

I just looked through my phone - I only use about 5% of available tech on mine so it is all uncharted territory for me - and found the setting called Quiet Time which fits SRS's tech method. You learn something new everyday. (Note: Although I use mine as a dumb phone not a smart phone, it is the cleverest phone I have ever owned. It was a hand-me-down from Hubby when he upgraded to an even smarter phone.)

Note to self: don't send PM's to BWM. :-D

I only ever had one not-so-nice PM here. I ignored it.

Subject: RE: Folk cyberflashing
From: Backwoodsman
Date: 12 Feb 26 - 02:14 PM

LOL Helen! ;-)