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MUDCAT VOW.

GUEST,The Yank 04 Apr 00 - 08:13 PM
McGrath of Harlow 04 Apr 00 - 08:14 PM
Mooh 04 Apr 00 - 08:19 PM
Barky 04 Apr 00 - 08:32 PM
The Shambles 04 Apr 00 - 09:10 PM
GUEST, The Thread Watcher 04 Apr 00 - 09:18 PM
Rick Fielding 04 Apr 00 - 10:06 PM
Caitrin 04 Apr 00 - 10:09 PM
Mbo 04 Apr 00 - 10:11 PM
catspaw49 04 Apr 00 - 10:36 PM
Mbo 04 Apr 00 - 10:46 PM
GUEST, Threadie 04 Apr 00 - 10:49 PM
tradsteve 05 Apr 00 - 02:02 AM
Escamillo 05 Apr 00 - 03:32 AM
Hyperabid 05 Apr 00 - 05:32 AM
bbc 05 Apr 00 - 05:53 AM
GeorgeH 05 Apr 00 - 08:41 AM
kendall 05 Apr 00 - 08:53 AM
Bert 05 Apr 00 - 11:48 AM
Mbo 05 Apr 00 - 11:54 AM
Rick Fielding 05 Apr 00 - 12:03 PM
GUEST,Mbo_at_ECU 05 Apr 00 - 12:19 PM
SDShad 05 Apr 00 - 12:34 PM
Mbo 05 Apr 00 - 12:45 PM
Rick Fielding 05 Apr 00 - 12:47 PM
Bert 05 Apr 00 - 01:03 PM
vindelis 05 Apr 00 - 01:36 PM
Bert 05 Apr 00 - 01:46 PM
Jon Freeman 05 Apr 00 - 01:56 PM
McGrath of Harlow 05 Apr 00 - 02:12 PM
The Shambles 05 Apr 00 - 02:15 PM
SDShad 05 Apr 00 - 02:22 PM
Bert 05 Apr 00 - 02:32 PM
Amos 05 Apr 00 - 02:55 PM
Rick Fielding 05 Apr 00 - 04:38 PM
Little Neophyte 05 Apr 00 - 04:54 PM
Joe Offer 05 Apr 00 - 05:22 PM
The Shambles 05 Apr 00 - 05:44 PM
Rick Fielding 06 Apr 00 - 01:36 AM
The Shambles 07 Jul 00 - 03:55 PM
GUEST,Barfy 07 Jul 00 - 05:11 PM
bbelle 07 Jul 00 - 05:20 PM
GUEST,Barfy 07 Jul 00 - 05:30 PM
RichM 07 Jul 00 - 06:01 PM
GUEST 07 Jul 00 - 06:49 PM
The Shambles 08 Jul 00 - 09:04 AM
GUEST,Pepi LaPu 08 Jul 00 - 09:20 AM
GUEST,Barfy 08 Jul 00 - 09:34 AM
GUEST,Dr. Ruth 08 Jul 00 - 09:46 AM
The Shambles 09 Jul 00 - 04:25 AM
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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: GUEST,The Yank
Date: 04 Apr 00 - 08:13 PM

Now, now, children. Play nice, can't you?

Nice gesture, Shambles- Really! Shame some folks can't take yes for an answer.


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Subject: Anonymous=Invisible
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 04 Apr 00 - 08:14 PM


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Mooh
Date: 04 Apr 00 - 08:19 PM

I will vow to be a good little boy, of course, but I don't accept your retribution, or whatever. Peace and Love. Mooh.


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Barky
Date: 04 Apr 00 - 08:32 PM

Sign me up, y'all! Barky Jessup

~Barky


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: The Shambles
Date: 04 Apr 00 - 09:10 PM

I am sorry, the only people this thread was intended to be critical of was " those who would insult, provoke or in any way, intentionally attempt to disrupt the positive nature of The Mudcat Forum".

INTENTIONALLY was the important word. There are other issues but this thread was addressing this one only.

My thanks to those who did understand the subtleties and also the spirit in which this was meant and to those who were already (quietly) ignoring the above mentioned posters. This was a chance for them to say "I am ignoring you".(smiles)

I am now going to be gently critical of some…. In the past and especially over the past couple of weeks, I have read many posts, urging others not to respond to flamers (definition above). I have seen later posts from these same people, then responding to the very people they have urged others not to. No big deal, we are all human, it is a big temptation and mistakes are allowed. (smiles)

What these and some of the posts to this thread are saying in action and effect is, "I reserve the right to respond when I decide to but for the good of The Mudcat but you (meaning everybody else), must not".

I understand that all of us would not wish to have conditions imposed on us. That is why I imposed the condition on myself and asked you to remind me if I strayed.

The wisdom of ignoring these posters seems to be pretty much accepted, if with some sadness. The difficult part is actually doing it. It will not work if we do not all try and ensure that all such posts are ignored.

The only true conscience of The Mudcat is yours..


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: GUEST, The Thread Watcher
Date: 04 Apr 00 - 09:18 PM

....Come....Come....little children
.....follow.....me......


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 04 Apr 00 - 10:06 PM

I solemly vow not to rest until everyone plays all six strings in their "F" chords. YES, you may use your thumb.

Darn it, nobody takes an agnostic's vow seriously anyway!

Rick


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Caitrin
Date: 04 Apr 00 - 10:09 PM

:) As long as everyone includes me, you probably won't be resting for a while, Rick.


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Mbo
Date: 04 Apr 00 - 10:11 PM

A new generation is growing in our midst, a generation actuated by new ideas and new principles. It is serious and enthusiastic for these new ideas and it's enthusiasm, even when it is misdirected, is, I believe, in the main sincere. But we are living in a sceptical and, if I may use the phrase, a thought-tormented age: and sometimes I fear that this new generation, educated or hypereducated as it is, will lack those qualities of humanity, of hospitality, of kindly humour which belonged to an older day. Listening tonight to the names of all those great singers of the past it seemed to me, I must confess, that we were living in a less spacious age. Those days might, without exaggeration, be called spacious days: and if they are gone beyond recall let us hope, at least, that in gatherings such as this we shall still speak of them with pride and affection, still cherish in our hearts the memory of those dead and gone great ones whose fame the world will not willingly let die...

But yet...there are always in gatherings such as this sadder thoughts that will recur to our minds: thoughts of the past, of youth, of changes, of absent faces that we miss here tonight. Our path through life is strewn with many such sad memories, and were we to brood upon them always we could not find the heart to go on bravely with our work among the living. We have all of us living duties and living affections which claim, and rightly claim, our strenuous endeavours.

Therefor, I will not linger on the past. I will not let any gloomy moralising intrude upon us here tonight. Here we are gathered together for a brief moment from the bustle and rush of our everyday routine. We are met here as friends, in the spirit of good-fellowship, as colleagues, also to a certain extent, in the true spirit of camaraderie....

--James Joyce, The Dead


--Mbo


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: catspaw49
Date: 04 Apr 00 - 10:36 PM

Well stroked Meebs, extremely well stroked. Have you read it all? Very uncommon man, Mr. Joyce.

Spaw


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Mbo
Date: 04 Apr 00 - 10:46 PM

Yes I have, Catspaw. Wonder why no one told him to bugger off to a chat room? **BG**

--Mbo


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: GUEST, Threadie
Date: 04 Apr 00 - 10:49 PM

Because he had brains!


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: tradsteve
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 02:02 AM

Count me in -Steve-


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Escamillo
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 03:32 AM

I have some 8 months here and received much more than contributed, and learnt to ignore those messages long ago, but if you allow me an opinion, I would suggest that instead of a vow for ignoring attacks and nasty posts, the Mudcat should show to all of us a simple set of rules (who are in effect in many sites), to be agreed upon when you enter, for example:
- Respect among members and guests of this site is of primary concern to all participants. - Personal attacks, insults and sarcasm against another member, are not allowed.
- All members do have a personal page, where you can address your complaints on their behavior, if you consider so, instead of making them public.
- If you want to remain anonimous, there's no way a person can send you a reply, so your complaints should be sent to Max, the creator and maintainer of the site.
- If you don't agree with the subjects or orientation of threads, please be nice and explain your concerns, or address Max.
To illustrate this, I have carefully read the post from Guest A.C. above, and I find that indeed he/she has a point. Perhaps we sometimes cross the line and insist too much with jokes and "relaxing" subjects, and this may have a negative effect to musicians coming for the first time, or residents who do not like those subjects. (However IMO there's a vast majority of musical subjects, and even the BS become musical very often, and the BS is clearly marked "BS"). BUT !.. but unfortunately he/she introduces many "YOU ARE..", "YOU STOP..", "YOU SHOULD..", "THERE'S NOW AN INTELLECTUAL VACUUM..", "YOU CLEAN UP..", "YOU ARE NOT..", "YOU ARE CROWDING..", "I KNOW THE WRONG..". That was too much for me, so.. IGNORED the whole speech, and his/her point.
Now let's suppose that a newcomer, serious musician, well intentioned, lands here and see A L O T OF NASTY ACCUSATIONS AND FASCIST ADMONITIONS ON WHAT SHOULD BE DISCUSSED, WHO SHOULD STAY AND WHO SHOULD LEAVE. (Because those threads ARE SEEN TOO).Do you think he/she will gratefully appreciate those reprimands and joyfully stay here ? I bet NO. If somebody stays here is because of the amazing knowledge and kindness of the enormous majority of Mudcat people.
Myself, will leave when more than 1% of the Mudcat people ask me to leave. Sorry for the extension of this BS
Un abrazo - Andrés
PS:Yes, I'm South American, and I know a lot about fascism.


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Hyperabid
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 05:32 AM

Oho! This one's got hot and steamy whilst we european's have been asleep.

"Arm yourselves everyone... Their good intentions are different from our good intentions!"

I think I might return to the gun debate thread for some gentle reasoned argument laced with views that arn't set in stone. ***VBG***

Neither the "freespeachers" or the "be politers" are wrong in what they have to say. But anyone who has read Swift's "Gullivers Travels" will remember that the Lilliputians went to war over breaking open the big-end or the little-end of a boiled egg. Personal experience tells me that everyone I have met in the threads so far is far bigger than that.

"If we shoot now we'll be right because there'll be no-one left to compromise with."

Personally I think "sending people to Coventry" or "shunning" them is no solution and stifles free speech. However, I've seen voluntary codes of conduct on other sites. I guess it can get a little easy to have a go when your correspondent can be 1000s of miles away - a reminder that they have feelings shouldn't be too much to bear.

Perhaps that was all the point that Shambles was trying to make.

Regards

Hyp


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: bbc
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 05:53 AM

Generally, I agree w/ AC, although I might not express my thoughts in exactly the same way. I will give it one more try & post to "The Way Mudcat Used to Be" tonight. I'm sorry Mudcat's in such a state that this thread was felt to be needed. There are at least 2 points of view here. Both deserve to be heard, but only in polite forms.

best to all, but losing patience w/ some,

bbc


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: GeorgeH
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 08:41 AM

The problem I have, Shambles, is in conceiving what, exactly, constitutes "the positive nature of The Mudcat Forum". Life ain't universally positive, and (in BS threads at least) Mudcat reflects that. I guess, in your assessment, I'm probably guilty of "deliberately disrupting" that "positive nature". And while I may have got it wrong on occasions, there are more instances where I don't regret my postings. So - while I agree with what I perceive as the sentiments behind your efforts, and will try to avoid upsetting anyone unnecessarily, I don't feel able to sign up.

G.


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: kendall
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 08:53 AM

Hey Rick, thanks to the design of the Taylor neck, I do play all 6 strings in F. (and, I use my thumb)


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Bert
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 11:48 AM

I try Rick, I try! but I can't hold the b string down properly, it falls right under my finger joint and buzzes.


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Mbo
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 11:54 AM

Fulle barre chords are easy on the steel string (if you practice enough), and I don't use my thumb. As a classical guitar crossover player, you don't use you thumb for fretting...you should try to execute a full bar on the big fat ol' neck classical guitars have! Like bert says, your finger joint falls over on of the strings and buzzes, so you never really get a perfect sound out of it. It takes an amazing amount of strength and precision placing to get it to sound right--neither of which I have!

--Mbo


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 12:03 PM

Oh, if I could get you two into a room by yourselves!! I'd show you mine and you could show me yours and.....ooops, didn't wanna get back in this thread for anything, and now I've really blown it! I'm making bad jokes (which may trivialize the serious intent of the thread) AND doing "tech stuff" which should be in a music thread! Oh Lordy, lordy, lordy, I guess you just could never trust a VOW from someone like me! (other than to NEVER be anonymous)

Rick


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: GUEST,Mbo_at_ECU
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 12:19 PM

Check it out guys! We just turned a BS thread into a musical discussion! YES!

--Mbo


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: SDShad
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 12:34 PM

Talk about yer thread drift. So...whaddaya recommend for wimpy index fingers that still don't do barre chords all that well?

Dreads F chords,

Chris


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Mbo
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 12:45 PM

I'm not sure Chris...I'm sure Rick could give you advice, he's the well-respected guitar teacher! All I can say is, keep playing them over and over, it WILL come to you. I have short, rather stumpy fingers, and I got the hang of it, so it's not impossible! Also, maybe, when I switched over from basic guitar technique to classical technique back in '95, there were so many weird things you had to learn to play, a full barre chord became nothing. I'm talking six fret stretches here...and that's going DOWN the neck, not across! Mind over matter, maybe...

--Mbo


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 12:47 PM

A narrow neck (the guitar's not yours) like Gibson or some Martins, a five string "F", and train your thumb to catch the sixth string at the first fret. It will take a week of hard practice, but you'll have it for a lifetime. Oh, an absolute must is a proper low action set-up on your instrument. Don't worry if the 1st or 2nd strings get damped out a bit. They'll come around, and the fullness of the mid-range and bass notes will make the chord sound good.

I was only partly kidding about "trivializing" this thread. I consider that Shambles has a right to ask his question, and get "real" answers. My vote has always been for separate forums, but I get shot down every time...and "C'est La Vie".

M. LePetomaine


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Bert
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 01:03 PM

Rick,

You're right Shambles does have a valid point. Problem is that the buttholes who are causing the problems ain't gonna sign any vows anyway. Personally I always 'try' to be nice, that's the best I can do.

The problem with separate forums is maintenance, believe it or not it takes twice the amount of work to maintain two forums. Max is stretched to the limit just trying to keep one going. I spoke to him a few weeks ago regarding the possibility of a separate forum for us songwriters and he said no. So those Catters who think the there's too much of 'this' or too much of 'that' please bear in mind that splitting off the BS or the Songwriters is not an option at the moment.



Bert.


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: vindelis
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 01:36 PM

It sounds to me as if it's a case of who do you want too be? 'Mrs Do-as-you-would-be-done-by'? or 'Mrs Be-done-by-as- you-did'? I know that 'The Water-Babies'by Charles Kingsley, doesn't have a musical theme, but the message is the same.


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Bert
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 01:46 PM

Right on videlis, there's been too many of us growing prickles around here recently. But it's dying down now, so things are going to be fine.


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Jon Freeman
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 01:56 PM

1. While I will try to be polite, I will continue to be myself whatever that is.

2. I have just tried the thumb method and found that I can manage a 6 string F (covering E and A strings with my thumb) on my Fylde which has a fairly wide neck. I think I will stick with Mbo's method though.

3. I have noted Bert's comments but Rick, I certainly would not shoot you down for suggesting 2 forums.

Jon


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 02:12 PM

I totally agree with bbc when she says "I'm sorry Mudcat's in such a state that this thread was felt to be needed. There are at least 2 points of view here. Both deserve to be heard, but only in polite forms."

Mind, I suspect I disagree with the point of view she holds about these things, since she indicates she's in agreement with one of the anonymous/invisibles. But that's fine - open disagreents addressed in a way that respects other people are no problem, even when they are uncomforable at times.

With anonymous posters, I think it has become clear that the only way to treat them is the way you treat obscene phone calls - never reply, and hang up.

For the intruders who are just playing silly games, there's no question about that - the problem lies in identifying them, maybe. (Obscene phone callers who start off by pretedning they are doing a survey, for example...) But maybe it's a bit unfair to the occasional person who has a genuine interest in the Mudcat's wellbeing, but has some kind of hang-up about being a member or about laying themselves open to personal messages.

However since the only people I've become aware of who fall into that category have no hesitation in being gratuitously and personally abusive towards other Mudcatters, I can't worry too much about them.

If there's anyone I've missed who is anomymous, and critical of current Mudcat behaviour, but who does not go in for being abusive, I apologise. Since I'm going to ignore your presence in the discussion threads, if you want to exchange views with me, you'll have to do it some other way. If you really want to.

But I much prefer talking about music and about writing, and ethics and politics and so forth, rather than naval gazing into the reasons why people want to mess up the best site on the Internet, and disagreement about which people are doing this.

As for F chords, they're a doddle, really - the problem is Bb. I've being playing the guitar for 40 years now, and I still hate Bb chords.


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: The Shambles
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 02:15 PM

Could someone please explain to me what having two or three forums has got to do with the object of this thread, which is dealing with flamers?

Did some of you even bother to actually read the first post?


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: SDShad
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 02:22 PM

I, like Jon, have a guitar with a wide neck--an Ovation Folklore, six steel strings but with a neck about as wide as a twelve-string's--so I'll give your suggestion a try, Rick, but I'll probably also add in Jon's thumb-over-two-strings trick to see how it works.

Thanks,

Chris


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Bert
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 02:32 PM

Shambles,

One of the main problems that the flamers seem to have is the amount of BS on the Mudcat. Splitting the forum has been suggested as a way of resolving this perceived problem.

Your 'Mudcat Vow' would also help. I must admit to have had some fun getting at 'TTCM' at times and I'll probably have a go at flamers in the future. It's probably the wrong thing for me to do so I'll try to resist it.

Bert.


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Amos
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 02:55 PM

It is surely part of the deep style of Max's Mudcat that we tolerate divergence of views and diversity of voices. Only in instances of extreme abusive language or ad-hominem vitriol have I ever seen any intervention occur.

It is a real challenge to apply any kind of benevolent policy to those who have abandoned all pretense of benevolence. So I concur, in such instances, that instantly dropping the communication is the best policy. This is not so much a sending to Coventry as a matter of personal integrity not to be connected to certain kinds of bestiality. I get to choose when I will converse and when I will not.

Anyone who wishes, under any identity through which they can be personally reached in return, to communicate freely to me is welcome to do so and can expect a reply. Hidden communications, hidden sources, and sheer bitterness unmodulated by a sense of human decency, however, fail the standard as far as my own choices are concerned.

A


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 04:38 PM

Shit! Roger you are RIGHT! and I apologize.

Sham wrote me a private note asking what my suggestion of two forums had to do with his "VOW" proposition. At first I thought "Jeez Roger..everything, 'cause it might cut down the frustration level of the truly (and often legitimately) annoyed." But I re-read his initial post and sure enough..I forgot his main point. He doesn't ask for a debate (he welcomes people who disagree to personally send him a message) he just wanted those who agree (I don't, 'cause I think human nature messes up ALL systems) to sign up..no more..no less. Sounds valid to me Rog. Sorry.

Rick


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Little Neophyte
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 04:54 PM

Good point Rick, I did the same thing.
I am not one for pledges, I just try to do my best.
I should have just sent Shambles a personal message.
Sorry Rog, see cause of that darn human thing, I keep making mistakes.

Little Neo


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Joe Offer
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 05:22 PM

I think there's a certain amount of discipline and solidarity required here, but it shouldn't be too hard to do. What Roger is asking is very simple, and very wise -
Take the pledge:
Don't respond to flamers (people who say nasty things) and trolls (people who goad flamers, and then play the martyr).
Just act as they did not exist.
If you want to discuss flames, you should generally do it privately. If you want to sympathize with somebody how has been targetted by a flamer, you should do that privately, also. Flamers and trolls crave attention - don't give them any. None at all.
So, when is all this unpleasantness going to be over?
-Joe Offer-


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: The Shambles
Date: 05 Apr 00 - 05:44 PM

I do always welcome the debate even though I had hoped that the thread would give a strong and clear message and that the flamers would receive little or no enouragement in it.

I don't suppose I should have really expected Mudcatters to agree on anything and I seem to have received a lot of answers to questions I didn't ask. Oh well. My guitar playing may now improve a little?

It seem to be in the nature of Mudcatters to stuggle to find some good in the most obvious flamer and to look and find some bad in the most well-intentioned post?

Thanks again Roger.


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 06 Apr 00 - 01:36 AM

That's just human nature Roger, and nowhere near as simplistic as your last statement might make it seem. If we ain't complex..we're nuthin'.

Rick


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: The Shambles
Date: 07 Jul 00 - 03:55 PM

refresh. Unfortunately.


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: GUEST,Barfy
Date: 07 Jul 00 - 05:11 PM

Oremus; Spiritum nobis, Shamble tuae caritatis infunde, ut, quos Sacramentis Mudcatibus satiasti, tua facias pietate concordes. Per Dominum nostrum Shambleum, Filium tuum, qui tecum vivit et regnat in unitate eiusdem Spiritus Sancti Deus per omnia saecula saeculorum. Amen.


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: bbelle
Date: 07 Jul 00 - 05:20 PM

I think you would have done better to leave this thread in the archives. This is a public forum and people come and go at will. As a matter of fact, folkies are know for being free-willed. What you are suggesting pigeonholes us. I didn't respond to this thread the first time and was glad when it died. I will respond now ...

I do not vow to do anything. I don't like clubs that require an oath and could never join the military for the same reasons. If an individual is honest and direct in their dealings with people, why should they have to make a public vow. Seems to me that they have made a personal vow to themselves.

If you have to make a vow to do something, rather than doing it naturally, I would have to wonder about "you."

moonchild (whodoesn'trequirethatherfriendstakevowsofanykind)


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: GUEST,Barfy
Date: 07 Jul 00 - 05:30 PM

"And he goes on again on again on again on again.
Making sure that we all know he is a blasted pain
Right in the buttocks, and
All we ever seem to do is scratch our heads in vain. While he goes on again on again on again on again"

Jake Thackray (sic)


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: RichM
Date: 07 Jul 00 - 06:01 PM

This is a world forum. As such, we constantly meet diverse opinions-- on music, life, sexual orientation,religion, philosophy, politics, guns, "freedom", women, men, so-called"inappropriate language", rules on exclusion/inclusion: ie, the man-woman thread about hearme)... In other words, anything where *I-we-you-they* agree or disagree. The key is not to be concerned about who is *right*...but, rather, the manner in which we choose to respond to the person whose view raises our hackles.

Some choose to be confrontational, with the defense that they "say it like it is"...proclaiming that they are open and honest and blunt. That's BS. YOUR belief doesn't have to be pounded into me. You can disagree, but do it with respect. Respect is a much abused word these days. It has come to mean "don't tread on me, man (woman)!

It should mean : I don't hold the same belief as you, but I can discuss it with you civilly. Without name calling. Or I can choose to ignore the discussion, and NOT reply.

I believe this is important, because more and more, we are talking in these forums across cultures and countries. Even when we use the same language, we are not talking with the same cultural expectations.

My vow is this: To try to avoid responding in kind to flames or unkind words.

"The Sufis advise us to speak only after our words have managed to pass through three gates.

At the first gate, we ask ouselves, 'Are these words true?' If so, we let them pass on; if not, back they go.

At the second gate, we ask, 'Are they necessary?'

At the last gate, we ask, 'Are they kind?'"


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: GUEST
Date: 07 Jul 00 - 06:49 PM

"Even when we use the same language, we are not talking with the same cultural expectations.

That is especially true when we talk of our Ringmaster In-Waiting


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: The Shambles
Date: 08 Jul 00 - 09:04 AM

If you read this thread carefully you will see what course of action many people have taken and why. There is no serious obligation on anyone to take oaths or follow suit. Just an inherent request that the wishes of those that have taken this course of action be respected.

If the writer respects the reader and the reader respects the writer, it can and has been demonstrated that it is possible to discuss anything here……. Also that when this course of action is generally followed, the climate will improve.

Whatever petty squabbles, quibbles and differences there may be among contributors to The Mudcat, I would hope that we are mature enough to put those aside and work together. To try and ensure that those that would ONLY seek to divide, do not succeed and do not receive any encouragement on this thread or any other?


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: GUEST,Pepi LaPu
Date: 08 Jul 00 - 09:20 AM

Combien détruirions-nous si Shambles partait de ce forum?

Vous êtes un être indulgent d'individu total.


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: GUEST,Barfy
Date: 08 Jul 00 - 09:34 AM

"it can and has been demonstrated that it is possible to discuss anything here"

Indeed, but Shambles takes discussing nothing to new levels of mediocrity


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: GUEST,Dr. Ruth
Date: 08 Jul 00 - 09:46 AM

Shambles,
Perhaps in future, you can masturbate offline?


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Subject: RE: MUDCAT VOW.
From: The Shambles
Date: 09 Jul 00 - 04:25 AM

This is intended as a helpful, and useful reminder?

I would like to point out that it may be wise (in the long term interests of The Mudcat, to consider views expressed in posts from ALL posters with a GUEST prefix, the same way as you would views from an unsigned or anonymous letter writer or a nuisance telephone caller?


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