BS: Evil Mystery Guest

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: SINSULL
Date: 05 Feb 01 - 06:48 PM

My cats scratch! No nekkid here.

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: hesperis
Date: 05 Feb 01 - 07:52 PM

i'm only ever nekkid if it's really warm in here! (And that means sweltering for you who don't know me that well... which is pretty much everybody!)

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Snuffy
Date: 05 Feb 01 - 08:05 PM

I am Spartacus

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Seamus Kennedy
Date: 06 Feb 01 - 12:28 AM

Damn, Snuffy, You beat me to it!

No, I'm Spartacus.

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Feb 01 - 02:39 AM

NO! I AM SPARTACUS!!! CRUCIFY ME! DO IT NOW!

But I am not the Evil Mystery Guest...

As for Hesperis' definition of a "really warm" room...that's when the candles start melting...and they haven't been lit yet. That's when the budgie gives up trying to cool his wings by doing the raised shoulders bit and suddenly falls off the perch and lands with a soggy thud on the carpet....to chirp no more. That's when the hamsters go on strike and demand little fans for their cages. That's when...well, you get the idea.

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 06 Feb 01 - 02:47 AM

"I AM NOT AN ANIMAL"!

Sorry, I knew I should have avoided this thread!

Rick(also not Spartacus, although I thought Jean Simmons was a babe)

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: LR Mole
Date: 06 Feb 01 - 09:49 AM

Yas, but is the dog spotticus? I had a dog once who was potticus, and pot something else.Poinsettia, I think.

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Bill D
Date: 06 Feb 01 - 01:34 PM

if this is an EVIL MYSTERY GUEST

what is this? Evil Mystery Guest

. .
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
v

...why, the lesser of two evils, of course...

No...please..I'll go quietly

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: SINSULL
Date: 06 Feb 01 - 02:36 PM

OUCH!!! Bill, that hurt.

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: hesperis
Date: 06 Feb 01 - 02:54 PM

Ok, George! I demand a duel...! Spaghetti to the last!

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: artbrooks
Date: 06 Feb 01 - 08:37 PM

What's an Orillian?

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: catspaw49
Date: 06 Feb 01 - 11:14 PM

an Orillian is a moderately rare sub species which we seem to have been able to capture and colonize here at the 'Cat. They are identifiable by their frozen brains, an unusual state of affairs but natural to an Orillian. Even existing in this state, they have strange powers not granted to or wanted by those of us who are normal, or at least have an IQ higher than that of a kumquat.

Their thinking processes, dulled by the sub-zero temperature of their brains, tend to lock in on strange things such as analyzing the meaning and symbology of Dylan lyrics and establishing tabernacles for the worship of psychotic astronauts. Most also have a fascination with oddities and hobbies which are often outlandish, such as saving and mounting for display their toenail clippings from early childhood and well into their adult lives.

Feed them Italian dishes served by zombie waiters named Ron and you will have no problems with them at all.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Feb 01 - 11:44 PM

Spaw, there is no waiter at La Mezzaluna named Ron!!! In fact there is no waiter at all there...but several very attractive waitresses with tresses to be proud of. It's your lousy luck that you are wasting away in Ohio, slowly perishing in the miasma of your own vile bodily essences, when you could be relaxing in the lovely surroundings of La Mezzaluna.

You're right about the oddities and hobbies, however, we have many, and have not admitted to all of them by any means as yet. Stay tuned.

Art - An Orillian is a proud resident of Orillia, the community from which Gordon Lightfoot "sprang", if I may use that term. It makes Buffalo, New York look like a hole. Of course, most places do... (Grin!) It's in Ontario, Canada.

Hesperis - Spahgetti duel is it? Okay, but I refuse to award the victory to the one who eats slowest this time, because I would definitely lose. We'll have to see about new conditions.

Back to Spaw - Dear friend and esteemed colleague, you will be delighted to know that as I walked into the local Sunoco station yeserday to pay my bill I heard wafting over the speakers the familiar strains of "Ground control to Major Tom..."

I knew at that moment the calm satisfaction that comes to one living in, dare I say it, a superior civilization, a civilization that frowns upon public displays of flatulence and phalluses longer than the owner's forearm being dangled over bridges into formerly pristine waterways, a civilization that has the good taste and decency to forbear from using the seven common mundane curses, except when they are fully justified by extremely vexing circumstances...indeed...a civilization we call CANADA. Yes, CANADA, home of the Tim Horton's Donut Shop, Red Rose Tea, Resdan, the Maple Leaf flag and all the other things that really make life worthwhile, tidy, and decent.

"Ground control to Major Tom..."

Ahhhhh....

Beautiful, just beautiful...isn't it?

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: wysiwyg
Date: 07 Feb 01 - 12:03 AM

Didn't we have a link to the Orillia Chamber of Commerce site once? Or did I just go find that on my own? Wait, surely I bookmarked it--

Dang! I deleted it but kept Casper, Wyoming and Ithaca NY!

Are there signs for Orillia like there are for Wall Drug, BTW?

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Feb 01 - 12:05 AM

"Wall Drug"???

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Rich(bodhránai gan ciall)
Date: 07 Feb 01 - 12:09 AM

I think this is getting to be another one of those threads that would best be served if we all ignored it and let it die, but of course I'm gonna end up refreshing it in order to say that I think this thread should die, because I'm just to obstinate to leave well enough alone and even though I of course have that last ditch option of hitting the clear entries block, I know if I had enough common sense to do that I'd have enough common sense to just not have typed anything to begin with and I was doing so well in my recovery from run-on sentences until now, but as you can see I've relapsed again oh damn you evil mystery guest................................!!!!!

Rich

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Amos
Date: 07 Feb 01 - 12:12 AM

The problem with the property of distributed blame is that most people run it from the inside out, taking that native sense of responsibility and projecting it onto their versions of all the kewpie dolls in the environment. This leaves them not responsible because the responsibility has all been passed around to the doctors, stars, athletes, neighbors, younger folks, older folks, off-color folks, Protestants and Lunarians around them. Makes for a funny kind of mindset which gravitates toward rigid solutions such as sitting in front of evil boxes in the living room having their brains sucked out.

Slowly.....

A

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: catspaw49
Date: 07 Feb 01 - 12:18 AM

You sure of that Mezzaluna stuff Hawk? I mean like you may only think you're enlightened since you've never heard of Wall Drug in South Dakota. Rumor has it that a zombie Ron is waiting for the chance to again return some glasses to a pretty woman and this time that OJ is in for it!

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 07 Feb 01 - 12:39 AM

Art, an Orillian is a devotee of the works of George Orill.

Glad I could be of help.

Rick

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Kim C
Date: 07 Feb 01 - 09:46 AM

I been out sick so it ain't me but I am Svetlana, Princess of Antioch. :)

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: SINSULL
Date: 07 Feb 01 - 09:49 AM

Red Rose Tea??? Is that where that crap comes from? Explains a lot.

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: wysiwyg
Date: 07 Feb 01 - 03:00 PM

Spaw, where is it that the Wall Drug signs start, do you know? What's their radius?

Somebuddy with more time than I have at present, please tell the Orillians more about this cultural icon, and the sign thing.

Wall Drug has a website now too, but it isn't as outrageous as the place actually is. It's at www.walldrug.com, of course.

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: artbrooks
Date: 07 Feb 01 - 10:00 PM

Hummm...sounds like being an Orillian is about as weird as being an Antiochian.

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: flattop
Date: 07 Feb 01 - 10:12 PM

Explains what SINSULL?

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: ddw
Date: 07 Feb 01 - 11:19 PM

There's really no such thing as an Orillian — they're just Torontonian social climbers....

david

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: wysiwyg
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 12:33 AM

And lo, they turned up at hoity-toity Toronto parties and raised their eyebrows during overheard intellectual discourses and drawled rahther languidly, "O Reeely???" For they were a wastrel, wenching lot, (one might say a dozey lot would they but acknowledge their dark English past). And they knew not of what they spake, but even so, thus, for a time, were they able to hide their shameful iggorance among the multitudes of their betters...

And such were called from the first, from the veriest first of times, O-reely-ans, and the word through all the land was that they had come from a heathen, ondogly wilderness called Orillia....

~Soozapaloozawottadooza, a Bbm prophet, in The Word According to the Hoobie Dooby

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Sorcha
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 12:42 AM

I guess EMG doesn't really want to come out and play. 76 messages, and it hasn't really responded, esp to the 20 Questions thing. Oh well.

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: wdyat12
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 03:01 AM

EMG sounds like a food additive Sorcha, but I'm sure that this person is not malicious, just having a good time on Mudcat. wdyat12

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: wdyat12
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 03:03 AM

I am. wdyat12

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: GUEST,EMG
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 07:42 AM

I am Midchuck.

The interesting thing is, I can't prove it.

Never thought of that.

I'll probably get a cookie on this computer today, so EMG will die. But the thread probably won't.

It also occurs to me that Mudcat may reject my attempt to register as Midchuck because it's already in use. In fact, it probably will.

Suggestions for a alternative name? Dumbchuck?

Peter.

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: jeffp
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 08:56 AM

Don't worry, Midchuck. I have identical cookies on 3 computers - 2 at work and 1 at home. It's no problem at all. Wherever I go, I know who I am.

jeffp

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: JedMarum
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 09:26 AM

I suggest you use "Midchuck Upstairs"

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: JedMarum
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 09:29 AM

... that way, if you continue to use both computers, your namw will tell us something about your location. It'll also tell us, according to your first post - something about your attire!

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: wysiwyg
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 12:02 PM

Nekkid Truth would work for me.

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Sorcha
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 12:24 PM

Rockchuck

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: SINSULL
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 12:41 PM

Mid Upchuck???

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Jeri
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 05:54 PM

Midchuck, just reset your cookie on the new computer. You can have the same cookie on different computers, but Max discourages multiple registrations.

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Little Hawk
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 07:05 PM

"the naked truth is still taboo whenever it can be seen"

- Bob Dylan

Oh, Susan...the phrase "Oh, really, Orillia?" is actually a popular one here, as it is the official name of a comedy revue that does regular public performances in this town. They are a pretty funny bunch, and they normally satirize the local political and social situation in Orillia, which, God knows, deserves to be satirized. Some pretty bizarre things happen here from time to time. I pray that Spaw never moves here, or it may get even worse!

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: GUEST,Blind Drunk in Blind River
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 08:03 PM

SINSULL - ???

What the flip do you mean .."Red Rose Tea??? Is that where that crap comes from? Explains a lot."

Red Rose tea is the best man! It rocks! Well, I mean if tea could rock it would, eh?

You useto get these little animals statures in every box of REd Rsoe tea, and they were cool. I had about 50 of them when I was a kid. I stole them from my sister, and I used to set them up on the fence and shoot at thme with my BB gun. Neat-O!!! I special liked popping the squirrels and the skunk.

You don't, like, get those with any of them fancy stupid herbal teas or anything,now do you, eh?

If you take about 50 Red Rose tea bags (which don't cost too much) and you can, like, put em in the bathtub in real hot water and, like, have a tea party, eh? You just dump in a few bottles of Rye, and Rum and Vodjka and stuff like that and stir it up good, eh?

You can ghet wasted just by sniffeing the fumes, man!

You can also do it with ice water, and then it's, like, iced tea, eh?

Either way is totally DECENT. I gotta get some Red Rose tea for the weekend, man.

See ya.

- BDiBR

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: SINSULL
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 08:13 PM

I like the tiny little tea leaves in Tetley. Red Rose is a staple in NY diners. It is brought to your table in bag form along with a luke warm cup of water. Nasty stuff. I did not mean to offend. My "It figures" simply meant that only crappy tea would grow in the Canadian climate.It was a feeble attempt at humor. I avoid herbal teas except when the local Genovese gives away a thermos mug with two boxes. Then I buy peppermint. I brew my tea in a pre-warmed pot and allow it to steep for exactly 1.5 minutes. Serve it with lemon and a touch of honey.

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: hesperis
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 08:24 PM

LH - why did you admit to Red Rose Tea coming from Canada?! The stuff's crap. It's worse than crap! It's REALLY BAD CRAP, probably made from rabbit poop. This could give Canada a bad name...

SINS - I don't know if the tea actually grows here. They probably import the really cheap end bits of REAL tea companies' leavings, and repackage it. Maybe they even import rabbit poop and repackage it as tea, who knows?

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: GUEST,Blind Drunk in Blind River
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 08:24 PM

Hey, man, no offence taken, eh? If ya wanna spice up the peppermint stuff, take a cup of Kalua and a bunch of whipped cream and put in a blender, eh? Then mix it 50/50 with the peppermint tea and drink shots of the stuff. Chase it with ice beer.

I figure the only way my life could get any better is if I had a key to the liquor store and the beer store afterhours. Maybe I shoudl get a job there as janitor! Geez, there's an idea, eh? I'm gonna check it out.

And if, like, Shania could visit on weekends too, eh?

and if I won the lottery.

And if I had a new 4 x 4.

And another snowmobile. ONe wiht a jacuzzi in the back.

What the hell, you only live once, eh?

- BDiBR

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: GUEST,Blind Drunk in Blind River
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 08:42 PM

Hesperis -

I said it before, and I'm, like, sayin it again...you are a LOSER! MAJOR LOSER! You hate beer and you don't like Red Rose tea. Geez! Whaddya do for fun?

I seen your pitcher, and you're, like, good lookin, eh? But your still a loser.

Your not gonna meet cool dudes with a loser type attitude, eh?

Who ever heard of importin rabbit poop, eh? Like we don't have enough of our own? Jeez, gimme a break!

That LH guy is a loser too, but at least he likes Red Rose tea, so he can't be a complete loser I guesstimate.

That's when you estimate, but it's a guess. Guesstimate! Funny, eh?

Go have a flippin cup of tea or a beer and get real.

- BDiBR

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Bill D
Date: 08 Feb 01 - 11:18 PM

cheap tea is cheap tea,,,"Orange Pekoe & Pekoe & cut black tea" means the small, outer leaves and the floor sweepings!....The choice leaves are the larger leaves from lower on the plant...

I have brewed loose tea for 40 years, and have tried most ways to get 'good' tea....Only thing is, I NEVER pollute it with milk. 'Maybe' a little sugar or lemon...depending

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: SINSULL
Date: 09 Feb 01 - 09:41 AM

jUST HAD A HORRIBLE VISION: mIDCHUCK, STARK NAKED AND SITTING ON HIS COMPUTER TITTERING WHILE bIGCHUCK SITS ON HIS SHOULDERS AND DRINKS BEER. bIGCHUCK IS IN JEANS AND A t-SHIRT; NO TITTERING.

Midchuck? Tittering? You? Spaw will titter before you do.

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 09 Feb 01 - 11:46 AM

Dear "Blind Drunk..." Your message may be pure "Canadian Hoser" but I'm afraid your (almost) perfect spelling has given you away. You are no mystery, but pure Orillian, through and through.

Now which one are you?.....ahahh, I think I've got it figured out!

Rick

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Little Hawk
Date: 09 Feb 01 - 05:47 PM

Rick - There are some guys a lot like him in Orillia, so you could be right. They tend to hang out at the Blue Anchor, and they used to be found at the Top Hat Bar & Grill till the place closed down (big drug bust!). Then too, they might be found at "The First" aka the Atherley Arms Hotel...Orillia's prime and perhaps only strip joint.

I drove a taxi for 6 months in Orillia and met quite a few people similar to BDiBR. Some were sober, most were not.

It's a creepy feeling knowing that BDiBR may be walking the very streets of my home town.

- LH

Hesperis - you are dead right about Red Rose Tea. It is probably the worst brand of tea ever foisted on a comatose public anywhere, but it has come to be indentified with Canada, because of a long series of silly TV adverts. I suspect, however, that it is made elsewhere, probably in Asia.

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Sorcha
Date: 09 Feb 01 - 06:02 PM

I don't think Tetley has much flavor, but it is better than Red Rose......yes, we can get that stuff in Wyoming. Orange Pekoe/Pekoe cut is just a cut above, but Twinings is the only half way decent tea we can get here.

(BTW, I really like "Upchuck" if Max would let us have multiple cookies)

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Little Hawk
Date: 09 Feb 01 - 06:44 PM

And can you believe that in those ads they claimed that Red Rose Tea was "only available in Canada"?

Gad! They must have been lying. Who would ever have suspected that TV advertisers would be untruthful???

I don't know if I am going to get over this easily.

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Evil Mystery Guest
From: Sorcha
Date: 09 Feb 01 - 06:51 PM

Hawk, it's OK, stay cool, don't blow your cookies.....calm, man, calm. You may be consoled by the fact that there is nothing worse than Instant Tea......and I admit to drinking the vile stuff, both hot and cold.