Lyr Add: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle

Subject: ADD LYR: Cat in the Kettle
From: Roger in Baltimore
Date: 19 Dec 98 - 12:51 PM

A friend in Texas send me this link. It is a parody of Harry Chapin's Cat's in the Cradle. It is a wav file, I believe, and takes a while to load at 28.8bps.

I have noted the lyrics.

Cat in the Kettle

Did you ever think when you eat Chinese
It ain't pork or chicken but a fat Siamese
Yet the food tastes great so you don't complain,
But that's not chicken in your Chicken Chow Mein
Seems to me I ordered sweet and sour pork,
But Garfield's on my fork,
He's purring here on my fork.

There's a cat in the kettle at the Peking Moon,
The place that I eat every day at noon.
They can feed you cat and you'll never know,
Once they wrap it up in dough, boys,
They fry it real crisp in dough.

Chow Lin asked if I wanted more,
As he was dialing up his buddy at the old pet store.
I said not today I lost my appetite,
There's two cats in my belly and they want to fight.
I was sucking on a Rolaid and a Tums or two,
When I swear I heard it mew, boys,
And that is when I knew.

There's a cat in the kettle at the Peking Moon,
I think I gotta stop eatin' there at noon.
They say that its beef or fish or pork,
But its purring there on my fork.
There's a hairball on my fork.

Sorry I have no attribution. Someone went to some extent to make a production number of this.

Roger in Baltimore

---

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I moved this message here from another thread on the same topic.
-Joe Offer-

Subject: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From:
Date: 31 Mar 99 - 04:45 PM

anybody know who wrote/recorded this?

CAT IN THE KETTLE
To the tune of: The Cat's In The Cradle

Did you ever think when you eat Chinese
It ain't pork or chicken but a fat Siamese
Yet the food tastes great so you don't complain
But that's not chicken in your Chicken Chow Mein
Seems to me I ordered sweet and sour pork
But Garfields on my fork
He's purrin' here on my fork

There's a cat in the kettle at the Peeking Moon
The place that I eat every day at noon
They can feed you cat and you'll never know
Once they wrap it up in dough, boys
They fry it real crisp in dough

Chou Lin asked if I wanted more
As he was dialin' up his buddy at the old pet store
I said not today, I lost my appetite
There's two cats in my belly
And they want to fight
I was sucking on a ROLLAID and a TUMS or two
When I swear I heard it Mew, boys
And was when I knew

There's a cat in the kettle at the Peeking Moon
I think I gotta stop eating there at noon
They say that it's beef, or fish or pork
But it's purrin' there on my fork
There's a hairball on my fork

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: catspaw49
Date: 31 Mar 99 - 06:02 PM

Alistair...Got your e-mail with this and I'm dragging folks in to hear it and all are cracking up. Played it over the phone for several too. Whoever does it , does it well!

Thanks Alistair

catspaw

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: Alice
Date: 31 Mar 99 - 06:07 PM

must be Weird Al or one of his cousins... brilliant

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: katlaughing
Date: 31 Mar 99 - 06:35 PM

Ptthhew! This is Heyokah. I've taken over kat's "pewter" to lodge a protest on behalf of ALL Siamese EVERYWHERE!! And, other less attractive cats. Dogs, too? NEVER! They stink, have rude personal habits, and might actually be good in Chinese food! I always say the only good dog is a cooked dog!

This song violates our right to live nine lives! How are we to do that inside somebody's belly, with someone else we don't even like?!

Furthermore, it ruins the reputation of those establishments which we like to patronise because they don't feature unknown meat in their ethnic dishes!

And, he says, looking down his long, Siamese nose, blinking his crazed and crossed blue eyes, "If you all don't stop making these sort of snide songs about the most intelligent and beautiful species on the planet, then I just may have to pull katlaughing's plug! Bye, bye, 'pewter. Bye, bye Mudcat! Ahahahaha (evil laugh)!

In Purrfection, I am,

Heyokah, Lord of the Seventh Realm & Grand Pubbah of the Lesser Knowns

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: Arkie
Date: 01 Apr 99 - 12:14 AM

Hey! another food song.

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: AlistairUK
Date: 05 Apr 99 - 06:03 AM

catspaw: I thought you might appreciate it. Sorry that I didn't reply sooner but I have been away for easter and only got back today. Terrifically suntanned and ready to take on the world. So come on "Pud 'em up....pud 'em uuuup"

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: AlistairUK
Date: 05 Apr 99 - 08:45 AM

Also but really strange, I have absolutely no idea who sent it to me (though I did check it for viruses)

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: Neil Lowe (inactive)
Date: 05 Apr 99 - 09:21 AM

I think it runs the risk of being offensive to some people. I, for one, would not have posted these lyrics.

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: AlistairUK
Date: 05 Apr 99 - 09:42 AM

well Neil see my xenaphobia thread...just whack me around the head for being a hypocrite.

now let's see if I can write a parody about dogs...hmmmmmm

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: Alex
Date: 06 Apr 99 - 01:49 AM

I wanderd into a biker bar onetime which had Kareoke. One guy sang the song straight unil he got to the line "What I'd really like, Dad, is to borrow your car keys" which he sang as ' . . borrow your Harley , , " - it still rhymed,

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: campfire
Date: 10 Sep 00 - 11:25 PM

Someone just e-mailed me this video of the parody - check it out!

Cat In the Kettle

campfire

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: oggie
Date: 11 Sep 00 - 11:32 AM

Thank you campfire for brightening up an otherwise miserable day!

All the best

Steve

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: GUEST,rabbitrunning
Date: 11 Sep 00 - 11:46 AM

Oh, my! That's hilarious! I will be giggling for hours, now.

Thanks!

;D

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: Giac
Date: 11 Sep 00 - 12:00 PM

Campfire, that's great! I don't have cats to offend, but my Chihuahua-mix thought it was pretty funny, 'til I told her that Alistair was considering a dog parody.~;o)

Giac

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Sep 00 - 01:38 PM

cat - the other white meat

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 11 Sep 00 - 05:11 PM

I live in St. Paul, Minnesota, an area that experienced a big influx of Southeast Asians (mostly Hmong, but also Laotian and Vietnamese) in the years after the Vietnam War.

When Asians first started coming here, one of the rumors that frequently circulated about them was that they ate cats and dogs. It was a story that had some plausibility. Many of them came from a culture where they literally lived in handmade huts with dirt floors, cooked their food over a campfire, and were illiterate even in their own language. (The missionary who invented the now-standard way of writing the Hmong language died just a few years ago.) When they first came here, they didn't understand such things as fishing and game laws, and there were a few notorious cases of people running afoul of the law for possessing enormous numbers of game fish, or for hunting songbirds. But they are mostly highly law-abiding people, and broke the law only out of ignorance. To them, hunting and fishing seemed a logical way of being self-reliant and not depending on charity or welfare.

The rumors alleged something far more sinister however. They were accused of stealing and eating people's pets. As far as I know, none of these rumors was ever substantiated. But they were hurtful.

Today, our Asian population has done an admirable job of assimilating. We now have Hmong doctors, lawyers, you name it, even a member of the St. Paul School Board (Neal Thao), and he is not the first. As far as I know, the ugly rumors are a thing of the past, at least in Minnesota, but the song "Cat in the Kettle" immediately reminded me of the bad old days.

I don't mind you making fun of Harry Chapin or Garfield, or even cats or cat-owners in general, but the idea of a Chinese restaurant serving cat cuts a little too close to the bone (sorry) for my comfort.

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: rabbitrunning
Date: 11 Sep 00 - 08:03 PM

Actually, in some parts of the world, dogs are a perfectly acceptable meat source, and jokes about cats being served in restaurants are multicultural. (Have you seen Sweeney Todd?) I grant you, this song isn't in the best taste, but some of the funniest songs I know are gross, and parody, by it's very nature, is rife with stereotype. Don't give the silly thing more power than it actually has.

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: The Lighthouse
Date: 12 Sep 00 - 12:18 AM

There's another tune to "Only The Good Die Young" by Billy Joel called "Only Eat Egg Foo Yung". Have to post sometime.

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: Lepus Rex
Date: 12 Sep 00 - 02:09 AM

Jim Dixon, I sort of agree with you there, and sort of don't. Like rabbitrunning, I'd say that they DO eat cats in parts of East Asia. But it does seem like Asians are 'safer' to target with a slur or an ethnic joke than, say, Blacks. And like others have said, *I* wouldn't have posted this crap.

In the town where I work (about a half hour North of you, Jim) it's pretty common to hear people use racial slurs like 'chink,' 'jap,' or 'gook.' Just recently, you may have heard about some Hmong boy scouts that came up here from town (StPaul?), to camp Ajawah, I think it's called, in Linwood. On a hike from Linwood to Forest Lake (about 10-12 miles), they had cars swerving at them, were threatened, had racist obscenities shouted at them, and were shot with paintball guns.

I don't think a single person was arrested for these crimes, and the public 'outrage' seemed to die down pretty quickly.

If I would've been on that road, you can be sure that I'd have intervened. And if these boys had been white, I'm sure someone else would have stopped the attacks, or at least made a phone call. To the police, for instance. It's all pretty depressing...

But, back to the song, I do think things like this may encourage ignorance about Asian cultures, and give fuel to dickweeds like the guys I mentioned in the boy scout story. But I also believe that almost 100% of Mudcatters know better than to take a dumb parody of a Harry Chapin song to be anything more than a dumb parody of a Harry Chapin song. So... Dumb song. :)

---Lepus Rex

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: Lepus Rex
Date: 12 Sep 00 - 02:13 AM

If you see any extra apostrophes up there, ignore them... I put them in strange words when I'm tired.

---Lepus Rex

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: Joe Offer
Date: 12 Sep 00 - 02:30 AM

Humor is a funny thing....
There are times and situations where "borderline" humor like this works OK, and other times when it falls flat on its face. We have a big Southeast Asian immigrant population here in Sacramento. When the immigrants first arrived, there were all sorts of rumors and jokes about pets disappearing and ending up on the dinner table. It was very clear that the jokes were based on bigotry, and I got sick of them very fast.
At about that time, an acquaintance visited me from Florida. As we were driving along, he told me one of those dog-eating Asian jokes. I was tempted to stop the car then and there and tell him to find his own transportation. I didn't do that, but I did tell him very firmly that I was offended by the joke.
And yes, I'm offended by this song. It's clever, but it expresses something that is closely entwined with very hateful prejudice. I can tolerate most things - but I have a hard time dealing with intolerance.
-Joe Offer-

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: Jeri
Date: 12 Sep 00 - 10:24 AM

...or misplaced apostrophes? ;-)

It's quite normal to look at cultural differences with a sense of humor, but can be a bad thing if it's meant hatefully. It's hard to determine a person's intentions/motives just from song lyrics. I'm not convinced this isn't an urban legend. I know people eat dogs in some places, but I've never heard of a culture incorporating cat cuisine. What about bugs? In many cultures/countries/places, people eat bugs. It seems weird to those of us who don't eat bugs. And if someone from a non-cheese-eating culture wants to make fun of mine in a song about people who eat microorganism-infested, fermented, mostly-dehydrated products from cow squeezin's, I'll probably laugh along with them.

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 12 Sep 00 - 02:59 PM

Jeri: Sure you can laugh NOW, but can you imagine yourself living as a cultural minority in a country where the majority was willing to harass you, discriminate against you, and irrationally accuse you of despicable crimes, in part because they THOUGHT people of your kind ate "cow-squeezin's," even if you didn't? Do you think it would still be funny THEN?

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: catspaw49
Date: 12 Sep 00 - 03:13 PM

Well there goes Garrison Keillor and Prairie Home Companion. I can't abide anyone so insensitive to Norwegians. Thanks for pointing this out.

Spaw

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: MMario
Date: 12 Sep 00 - 03:14 PM

gee - I live in a country where people will make fun of me , despise me and discriminate against me because :

1) I eat meat

2) I don't eat meat

3) I am overweight

4) I am underwieght

6) I am too tall

7) I am too short

8) I dress funny

10) my hair is too long/too short

etc etc etc etc. If we avoid every subject that may offend anyone, there isn't going to be any conversation or communication left.

NOTE: I am not trying to trivialize anything here, but INTENT DOES need to be taken into consideration.

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: catspaw49
Date: 12 Sep 00 - 03:16 PM

Mario, I'm POSITIVE that Garrison is making fun of Norwegians.

Spaw

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: rabbitrunning
Date: 13 Sep 00 - 01:15 AM

One of the best "dogs as food in Chinese restaurants" comedy routines I ever heard was told to me by the waiter in a Chinese restaurant. He's also the guy who explained that the dogs which are part of some Asian/Pacific cuisines are not the same dogs that are kept as pets (except during famines.) I have no idea if cats ever actually show up on a menu on a regular basis anywhere.

So you're probably safe, Spaw.

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: L R Mole
Date: 13 Sep 00 - 11:15 AM

Anyway, imagine the jokes they tell about us.

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: Grab
Date: 13 Sep 00 - 02:22 PM

Jeri, cats were served in restaurants as "roof rabbit" in Holland during the German occupation, but this may be a necessity thing rather than from any kind of culinary experience.

Not Chinese, but a story from a colleague when he got back from working in the boonies in India. Apparently the hotel would serve chicken curry every day, no other dishes, and after a couple of weeks they were a bit bored of this, so they asked the chef if he could do something else. That night, they got a curry made of something other than chicken, but no-one could identify it. They asked the chef, whose only answer was, "Don't worry, is not chicken, is not chicken." They hadn't a clue what it was - best guess was either dog or goat.

Oh, and the Chinese language has the word "gwailo" for Westerners, which carries a strong negative charge - roughly similar to calling a Chinese a "Chink".

Nothing wrong with parodies - in the end, everything gets parodied. Next thing, we'll be saying that the Monty Python lumberjack song is insulting to Canadians. There's also plenty of jokes about British cooking - I've seen Greg Proops do a routine where he produces a book called something like "Scotland's greatest cooking", which is about 1/2 cm thick, and there's things along the lines of "A quick guide to English cookery - take your food, boil the crap out of it for half an hour, and serve lukewarm". Or is it only acceptable to do parodies if it's your own culture you're parodying?

Grab.

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: Wincing Devil
Date: 13 Sep 00 - 03:44 PM

As a cat lover, let me say this:

HI-FREAKING-LARIOUS!
Some people need to go to the library and check out a sense of humor!

Wincing Devil >;-( There is no such thing as an ugly cat. (http://www.ILoveMySphynx.com)

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: mousethief
Date: 13 Sep 00 - 04:35 PM

Apparently according to some, you can laugh about anything you like -- EXCEPT stereotypes.

I have no problem laughing about people other than me, because (1) I'm sure they laugh about me, and (2) I don't think they are inferior or worse than I am because they are different.

Ultimately the only thing humans laugh about are ... humans. If we laugh at animals it's because they remind us of humans.

If we never said anything that might possibly offend somebody, we'd never say anything. And I hate mime.

O..O
=o=
click me

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: Wesley S
Date: 15 Sep 00 - 11:30 AM

I don't know if this will open up a whole new can of worms but many years ago here in Texas the health department was checking out the Enchilada special at a Mexican restuarant. What they discovered was a large quanity of dog food cans in the dumpter. El Rancho Fido was eventually closed. I hope I can find a song in this eventually even though it might offend someone, somewhere.

I've always wondered if the health department was tipped off by the customers that were chasing cars after dinner. Or was it the fire hydrant outside..................???

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From:
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 06:54 PM

well im not cool i just found this song the other day ....i found a cd and it had it on it....i think its hilarious!!! i really hate cats they are losers not cool....i really hate cats so i think me and the chins would get along since you know you have to kill the cat to eat him....i dont think i would eat a cat but the thought of the cat being dead is hilarious....cats suck!

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: bob jr
Date: 31 Aug 02 - 04:26 AM

i dont think its funny at all. borderline racism never makes me laugh . guess i need to work on my sense of humour.

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: GUEST,Sarah
Date: 20 Jan 03 - 06:51 PM

Borderline racism?? Some of you skids really need to learn to take a joke!! This is funny stuff...actually the guy who wrote it came to our Church's General Conference. He performed it and several other hilarious songs. He's really good!! I can't remember the name... I'm leaning towards the Micheal something area though. If I can remember I'll make sure to let ya'll know so you can check out his other great songs. Great guy. He meant no harm in the song. He has several cd's out and does performances all over the country. I had the wonderful opportunity to meet him. Really great guy...

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: Cluin
Date: 20 Jan 03 - 08:23 PM

yadda yadda yadda...

This is a song by one Bob Rivers. He does tons of these sorts of parodies. Others include: Oops I Farted Again, Free Ballin', It's In His Piss, Bitchy Woman, Heavin' On a Jet Plane, I'll Be Stoned for Christmas, Martha Stewart My Dear, Whiney Sappy People, Back In a U.S. Made Car...

A sense of humour is needed to listen, but the shtick does get tiring fairly quickly.

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: GUEST,Sarah
Date: 20 Jan 03 - 09:52 PM

It's also done by Mike Williams...a christian comedian...he has a website www.christiancomedian.com His cd's and books and everything can be bought there and it tells all about him.

Subject: RE: ADD LYR: Parody of The Cat's In The Cradle
From: GUEST,fox4zero
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 12:06 AM

When I read all of the mostly humorous preceding contributions, all I could really think about is how much I hated the original lyrics!!!

That song always made me feel so damn guilty about all of the similar
sins I committed in the raising of my children. I came home from work tired and cranky and was attacked at the door by 4 loving daughters, and my response was to tell the to "ease off and let me unwind a little". What an unappreciative shit I was!

I love all of the parodies, racial and gustatory, because they demean the pain of the original lyric.

Larry Parish